Most of you probably haven’t noticed (or cared to notice), but I’ve been gone from this site since very early November. It’s strange to be back, and I’m honestly surprised that I was bombarded with private messages and posts about my sudden disappearance.

Before I start, I want to just say that I am so touched by the messages you guys left me. It feels unbelievably heart-warming to know that some people actually care about me, while others could even care less that I was gone from this site—most of you guys probably didn’t even notice.

So, first off, I’d really like to apologize. I selfishly left without a word, unintentionally making some of you worry about me (and I say some, not most, because most of my “friends” on this site don’t even bother to actually befriend me). With my friend commiting suicide, my family being evicted (again), having to move to a new city with entirely different people, my uncle being diagnosed with cancer (and we found out right before Christmas. Yay, right?)—2013 was not my year. In November I decided to leave this site because I figured no one would care anyways, and, seeing all these messages, I guess I was wrong. To some degree.

A few weeks ago, after being struck with another anxiety attack, I started re-evaluating my life. I also started thinking about ways to relieve my stress. I thought about this site and the people I’ve met and, now, I feel terribly guilty leaving you all without even a goodbye. Since finals just ended yesterday for me, and I have today off with no school, I now have some bit of spare time before I go out with my friends tonight; I decided to log back into this site.

I’m back for only a few hours right now, maybe, just to check things out, to go through the messages you guys left (which I will do after this blog post). I don’t plan to deactivate my account in case some of you want to still have access to my wall (but I won’t be able to see your wall posts; you have to have an AFF account to be able to see people’s walls) and stories.

Oh, yeah, on the topic of my stories, I feel terrible. I’m not at all great author—not even a good author—but I still feel bad about leaving them incomplete. I’ve always been the person to finish what I start, but lately I’ve been forgetting who I am.

I don’t want to get into a rant, because most of you probably won’t care anyway, so I’ll end it here. I know I’m forgetting to say some things, some important things. If I remember I’ll add it to this post later before I leave.

Thank you everyone on this site. I’ve had a lot of laughs with you guys, shared a lot of pain with you guys, spazzed a lot with you guys. I’m sorry for having left in November without a single notice. I’m sorry to, again, leave this site with unsaid goodbyes and unfinished stories. Well, that’s it, for now, I guess. Happy 2014 and Happy Lunar New Year.