so tired...

its been a long time since ive cried...haha...

and i cant believe its only been 3 days and my "boyfriend" and i are breaking apart already...i guess it really doesnt work out does it...? i want it to work out though...i want to be with him, even if it's through the internet...but am i dreaming? like im dreaming that one day i can become and idol and junhyung can love me?

haha....such a far fetched dream but i feel like im comparing my relationship with the right thing.

i love him.

i seriously love him.

yeah...its only been 3 months.

3 months and i can already say i love him.

funny right...?

but this is the way love works....it's always been this way.....

once he says he wanted to break up with me, ill be sure to delete him out of my life...like the other one....who was such a dear friend to me...someone i could never bear to lose because he knew me, he knew me like no other person...and yet, in the end, i still lost him...i lost him...and i regret it.

so now, im giving the power of hurting me over to my 3 days boyfriend....i don't want to break another heart anymore...i dont have a heart made of steel....i can't do it twice. 

im sorry for all the ranting...

the people who KNOW im in a relationship knew that i was happy...i was so happy that i couldn't stop smiling...even in my sleep...but now...i guess ill be crying myself to sleep huh??? haha...

yeah...maybe that's a good idea.........

in and out.

musicISme