I feel an explanation is required as to why I've decided to leave writing for AFF preferrably soon as I finish one last story (Across the Milky Way), so here it is if any of you are curious. 

This isn't really a sudden decision or an unexpected one, but rather something I have been considering for a long time and comes about as a result of the place I am in my life right now, and what I would like to get out of my own life. Right now, I'm in university, and these are some of the most important years of my life - and the ones where I'm supposed to be having my "most beautiful moment in life". Now, don't get me wrong - I love writing. I love telling stories, I love creating worlds, I love putting the human condition under a microscope and figuring out why people are the way they are. But fanfiction just isn't cutting it for me anymore. I want to play in a sandbox of my own creation, rather than with a bunch of Korean celebrities who don't even know I exist. I feel tired writing fanfiction more often than not, because I feel like I'm doing something that just no longer interests me, but I have to do it, because the people reading what I write expect something. And that is a totally unpleasant feeling for me, and makes me stressed, upset, and unhappy. For the sake of my own mental well-being, I'd rather not be doing something I don't enjoy, especially when this is something I have total control over stopping. 

Moreover, I know I need to handle my time wisely in this stage in my life. There are so many opportunities out there, good grades I need to get, school I need to pay attention to, that fanfiction is just a completely unnecessary distraction. I love KPop, but I don't want it to consume my life. I tried that for a few months, and it was, quite frankly, the worst decision I ever made. It was stressful, it prevented me from doing any of my schoolwork, it made me miserable and tired and unable to pay attention in class, and I didn't do anything but sit in my dorm room with my laptop, wondering why I was wasting my time on something that wasn't even giving me any pleasure. Appreciating the music is already more than enough for me. 

Things have also changed in my life since I started this account. I fell back into dancing, something that I want to commit a lot of my free time to. I found a group of friends on my university who I love spending time with. I fell in love and have a wonderful boyfriend whom I want to spend time with. I have a life to lead, and fanfiction just isn't part of it. 

The people around me are doing so much with their lives, too. My best friend filmed a short film over the summer and is pursuing multiple film projects and writing a screenplay. I mean, who knows if he'll ever achieve anything with it, but he's doing something, all the time. He's putting all his creative energy into something that he loves and actually putting something out there in the world. I have friends who are directing plays, writing novels, trying and trying and trying to achieve something in the creative industry. And I know very well that in order to succeed in that department, I need to start putting in effort now, or it's going to be too late someday. Fanfiction is just a distraction from the things I need to do - I tell people I have all these original ideas for my own art but I never do anything, and then I write fanfiction and say I'm "practicing". It's time I start to grow up and actually do something with my life. 

It wasn't all bad being on this website, not at all. I met some great people who encouraged me, gave constructive feedback, and supported my writing. Most of my stories will remain up - Lights Gone Out for sure will be taken down as barely any of it was posted in the first place, and I don't need the temptation to return - and should I chose not to continue Across the Milky Way, I will add an outline of how that story was meant to end. Thank you to all of you who became my friends here even though I didn't really do much to put myself out there; you made my time writing here a great experience, and I will still be here to contact, and to lurk around your wonderful writing. Thank you especially to those of you who were there when I needed someone to talk to. Thank you to my readers who stayed around and read what I put up here; your compliments always made my day. 

And thank you to EXO - you were the ones who got me on this site. 

Today after I decided to go through with this decision, I felt so much lighter, and it was a nice feeling. A really, really nice feeling. So here's to the next chapter of whatever happens. 

See you all, someday, somewhere!

~Else