I think almost everyone in LME would know about this heh

So there's this dude (we call him Pedo) whom I've known for the seventh year, like we used to be in the same primary school and we were also classmates so basicaly after we graduated most of us scattered everywhere but I'm still in really close contact with him because 1) we live in the same neighbourhood, and thus 2) we go to school on the same transportation.

So BASICALLY our relationship wouldn't have been so complicated but he's seriously acting very fishy lately
when I mean lately I mean for the past four years of highschool

Like I DON'T KNOW BACK IN PRIMARY SCHOOL HE WOULDN'T ASK ME WHY I WAS ABSENT OR LEFT SCHOOL EARLY OR GIVE ME KEYCHAINS JUST BECAUSE I WANTED THEM BUT THEN AFTER WE ENTERED HIGH SCHOOL WE BECAME REALLY CLOSE AND HE WOULD DO ALL THE ABOVE THINGS AND CONGRATULATE ME WHENEVER I GET A PRIZE OR SOMETHING AND SHARE ABOUT HIS DAY AND EVEN SECRETS okay he said he wouldn't mind if I shared that stuff with others but I still think it sounded like something people wouldn't want the world to know about so yeah I assume it's a secret

And then for somebody who gives no about things other than gaming, to watch K-pop videos when I ask him to, he earned my credits.

And WELL I JUST DON'T KNOW MAYBE HE'S ALWAYS BEEN NICE TO GIRLS BUT IT JUST DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT TO ME BECAUSE MAYBE I'M THE SENSITIVE ONE BUT THERE HAS HARDLY BEEN ANYONE WHO HAS BEEN CONCERNED OF MY MENTAL HEALTH 

Like UGH YOU KNOW he just gives me the "trust me //pats shoulder" feeling

Maybe because I'm pretty much useless and even though I told him a lot of stuff I wouldn't mind if he told others because we're not that close lel (we hardly talk to each other out of the transport van)

And I can't make conclusions because he has always been nice to me even before he got dumped by his girlfriend for being a busy prefect (I clap for her tolerance level) but you know

I'm probably feeling this because 1) I'm sixteen and desperate, if I don't date anyone by now I'm pretty much going to be a single lady; 2) I've honestly NEVER been treated this well by boys (not even that other dude even Pedo knew to ask about my health and he isn't even a gentleman like YOU ㄱ_ㄱ); 3) I just want to feel better for no reason lel

Some of my friends advised me to literally ask him if he really likes me and most of them suggested that I wait for a little longer (I'm already rotting from the wait it's FOUR BLOODY YEARS OF WAITING) and I seriously have no idea what to do I'm going to see him when school reopens and that's in TWO DAYS FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHASDVJLJERVIUBVIRTVKLFK

I don't even remember why I wrote this blog post in the first place OTL

I just want an answer to justify whether my guesses were right or I'm just being delusional over somebody who probably never looked at me as a crush, but how am I even supposed to ask him for the truth do I just go up like OH HEY FRIEND DO YOU HAVE FEELINGS FOR ME BECAUSE IF YOU DO THEN YOU GOTTA TELL ME