01/14/16 {An Unexpected Dream}
01/14/16
So last night, I celebrated Jongin's birthday. Bought a cake and lighted the candles as I sang happy birthday all by myself. My mom finds it funny why I did some lil' efforts for someone I never met in person, she said I was too crazy about him. Well, I am. I have always been crazy, duh. But so you know, the best people are crazy.
Anyway, I woke up by 6 in the morning today and was too lazy to go for class. My class during Tuesdays and Thursdays would start by 9 sharp and it takes a lot of time preparing and stuff and plus, I was totally not in the mood to go to class since I had a stomachache. Again. I told my mom I can't go for the morning classes and stayed in bed reviewing my afternoon notes. Attending the afternoon classes would be enough.
I was about to continue reviewing my Linguistic notes but then my eyes started to feel heavy again and so I ended up sleeping. Again.
Then I had the best dream ever.
Who would've thought I'd dream about Jongin? It was too amazing, too enchanting to be true! It felt so real. The dream I had this morning was too beautiful.
I wasn't sure why I was in a 'fanmeeting' whatever presscon for EXO'luxion concert but I knew that EXO was in there (that dream). I was even depressed about the thought of EXO coming back here in the Philippines, this time for a solo concert but I was totally shocked on why I was in there. I muttered a lot of 'What the s' for sure.
The room was big and there were bunches of camera flashes coming from photographers and a lot of reporters bringing portable microphones too! The vicinity was covered with maroon or maybe dark red curtains and the ceiling was creamy white. It was a press conference! I squealed upon the thought as my eyes wandered in every corner.
And there I spotted Jongin. About seven meters away from me on a higher platform.
He was wearing white, an elegant suit. Reminded me of what EXO wore last MAMA 2013. The other EXO members were blurry, but I could distinguish Chanyeol's hair because of his height. But above all, I could only see Jongin clearly and then again, it felt so real!
A loud ringing voice through a microphone suddenly filled the area, it was woman maybe in her thirties. She was calling the 'security staff' for a prompt picture with EXO.
I blinked, feeling a bit disappointed. And as I looked down, I saw myself wearing a security ID printed in bold letters. I was so sure that I even wore a white polo and black, formal pants. But then how did I even reach there as a security? That was funny.
I didn't care and strutted my way towards EXO. Obviously, sauntered towards Jongin's direction, particularly. He was alone, a meter away from s. I had a quick thought that this might be a chance. A chance. And I didn't care if this was a temporary dream or just a product of mere fantasies I had for three years.
I wanted to talk to him. It's fine if I couldn't touch him, I respect that, but I just wanted to look at him closely even just for two minutes.
And I actually did.
He smiled as he face me, not the sinister kind he would posses onstage but the genuine kind. His hair was medium brown, not waxed. He was really tall! I was only up to his chest. His complexion was bronzy and healthy. His jet black eyes seemed to sparkle glitters.
He outstretched his hand for a handshake and my eyes suddenly released involuntary tears.
I was not sure if I wailed as I took his hand offer. I held onto his big hands and I could hear him chuckling. I was really crying so hard and I tried not to squeeze my eyes shut, I was scared of waking up back to reality.
And then I felt his long arms wrapping around my frail shoulders in a warm embrace. I could feel his chin resting on my head as he tightened the embrace. It felt so warm, so true.
"I am a super big big big fan of yours, Jongin." I said between sniffs. His embrace loosened, he was trying to look at me as I spoke. I then realized that it was embarrassing.
"Thank you." His English accent was too cute. And his voice, oh his voice! His voice is just everything.
"Happy Birthday." I said softly, looking at him in the eye. He smiled once again. Was he smiling all this time?
I had a thought that it'd end with another bunch of 'thank yous's' but unexpectedly, he pointed far south of the room and I instantly trailed the direction.
I blinked rapidly upon seeing Hyoyeon from Girls' Generation clapping like an excited seal. My eyes went further around and I could see the press clapping as well. Everybody was!
It looked just like Jongin proposed to me and I said yes.
I mentally slapped myself for having the hideous thought ever and decided to bow as a formal 'thank you'. But then Jongin instantaneously wrapped his arm around my waist and carried me in a bride-style kind.
I was shocked of course! Like, totally! Everything seemed like an overstatement of my thoughts. Why would he even carry me? I covered my mouth with my palm to prevent myself from smiling too wide. I could hear him speaking Korean, seemingly giving orders to some staff.
And there I saw a long red carpet on the floor. A row of people wearing the same formal outfits just like mine on each side. They started throwing petals of yellow chrysanthemums all over the place.
Just how on earth and why? My eyes went into circles of big saucers upon the sight.
He was still carrying me as we walked on the red carpet. I gazed and he smiled. I laughed in return and wished that the moment would last forever.
But of course, it's just some fantasies from an eighteen year old girl who goes to college and dreams of meeting her ultimate bias just like that.
Before the dream ended, I whispered to him in the ear these words:
"I know that this a dream and you don't understand me too but I just wanted to say thank you for everything. Good luck! And I know you can do it. You are amazing. I love you, and I always will."
Our gazes met, our faces about five inches away and I smiled. I could clearly see his cheeks turning red. His ears too!
He then placed me down back on the ground, realizing that it was a taxi-dropping area. Everything happened too fast and I wished he would stay. But then, it was more than enough.
And I was sure, he struggled with English as he shyly said, "Let us meet again soon!"
He waved goodbye and I waved back. Everything was perfect.
Everything was so real.
I woke up, realizing it was already 8:30 in the morning. Paused and looked on the cream ceiling of my room.
I laughed, a tear rolling down my cheek in the process.
It's an arduous life, being a fan girl and all. Living in fantasies and spending much money on you idol's merchandise and albums. It's much like a sacrifice. But it's just one of the truest bliss I have in life.
And soon, one day, I will meet him. I definitely will.
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