In our life, there will be a moment when we have this kind of thought. I used to think like that too. But, no matter what, life must go on. Once i told myself, "Sampai bila nak jadi macam ni? Sampai bila nak jadi takut dengan orang? Bila hang nak berubah? "

Sejujurnyalah, untuk orang yang introvert macam saya ni, memang susah kalau nak bercakap dengan orang. Tapi nak tak nak kena cuba la. Tambah lagi bila dah masuk universiti. Makin kita dewasa, makin banyak cabaran dia. Konflik dalam hidup ni benda normal. Memang adat dalam hidup manusia. Tapi, tanya balik diri sendiri. Sama ada nak lari dari konflik tu, atau nak selesaikan konflik tu?

Apapun, May Allah ease your mind. ^^ No offence okay? Maaf sekiranya ada terkasar bahasa. ^_^

I somehow got the same problem with you. I'm much older . I still feel scare and nervous even thou I had some experience working and all. I think everyone does feel it somehow at some point. Just maybe the level of it is different but I somehow felt that ours is kinda same from the description. I somehow hope that you'l finally find the courge to breakthrough . You can do it. Never give up no matter what. Just like me I keep on challenge myself.

being the oldest child is tough. your worth is in how you view your own life--not in how anyone else views it.

for some reason i feel that i totally understand this feeling...and worse...i struggle with my shyness and lack of confidence at older age(assuming you're 97er)...it's not easy for shy people or those with low confidence to go out and push themselves forward to engage in social world/finding job...maybe...get a friend to accompany you? you're still young so it's still not too difficult to start finding footing in growing that courage and definitely not to late...yet...it'll probably get harder the older you get so maybe you can start to take small steps to grow the courage little by little...maybe find some online job application if you want to get a job...or get a friend to accompany you...or simply ask for your parents help...first step will always be hard...but once you're through that step...it'll be better....good luck~

You are not useless, not at all. It might be better for you to get some work, or to go to college or Uni, but it is your decision at the end of the day. If you get to work or you go to study, you get to meet new people and have new experiences. They will shape your life decisions in the future. But you shouldn't do something just because someone tells you to. If you are interested in painting, for example, maybe take an art course. If you are interested in sports, maybe join a sports club. If you do something that makes your life more exciting, then you see new things.

To be honest, I don't think you've disappointed your parents. Sure, they would rather you have a good job and an income instead of being at home, playing all day, but you haven't disappointed them. If anything were to happen to you, if you were to be hit by a truck tomorrow (heaven forbid!), your family will still miss you and still mourn you. They just want the best for you. That's all it is. If you are disappointing anybody, I think you might be disappointing yourself, because you have higher standards for yourself.

Maybe, if you can, why not get some volunteer experience? Once a week, volunteer somewhere. Work with people, meet new people, talk to strangers. Maybe then you can understand new things and build your own confidence, because you will see that you are doing a lot of good work. It's just a suggestion.