❛ 我们不都是这样 — lin nari
lin nari
profile information.
name
lin nari.
nicknames
hua (花 - flower) - given to nari by both her parents since birth. reason is because her mother (whom is korean) named her "nari" (나리) which translates to "lily".
birthdate & age
december 31, 1986. 29 years old.
birthplace & hometown
birthplace: taipei, taiwan.
hometown: jeju-do, south korea
hometown: jeju-do, south korea
ethnicity & nationality
ethnicity: chinese-korean
nationality: korean
nationality: korean
bloodtype
o rh negative (o-)
occupation
psychiatrist in seoul, south korea.
the exterior.
faceclaim & backup
primary: park seul
secondary: lee chaeeun
secondary: lee chaeeun
height & weight
160 cm. 54.5 kg.
appearance
nari has long straight hair that is naturally dark-brown. her hair reaches midway down her back and is uniform all around, so she does not have bangs. normally, she would part her hair equally down the middle, but off to either the left or right side if she's feeling a little fancy.
her physical flaws include scars (self-harming, which is included in "the story"). these are normally found in places that can be easily hidden, such as: her upper thighs and stomach. she only has one scar in a visible place (her left inner arm). this was caused when nari was 16 and got into a car accident. the bumper of the car had fallen off and ended up cutting her arm.
her physical flaws include scars (self-harming, which is included in "the story"). these are normally found in places that can be easily hidden, such as: her upper thighs and stomach. she only has one scar in a visible place (her left inner arm). this was caused when nari was 16 and got into a car accident. the bumper of the car had fallen off and ended up cutting her arm.
the interior.
personality traits
positive: alert, caring/understanding, hard-working, modest, realistic, and mature.
negative: dishonest, envious, short-tempered, reserved, destructive, and cowardly.
negative: dishonest, envious, short-tempered, reserved, destructive, and cowardly.
personality
there is a common belief that psychiatrists are social--nari seems to not fit into that common belief. as a matter of fact, nari never seemed to fit into anything. she was considered to be reserved and refused to communicate with her peers, so she never belonged in a "group". however, when she is at work and carries a badge of status, she seems to be an entirely different person. she is--for once--relatively social. she talks to her patients and understands them on a personal level. when dealing with patients and non-patients, she is quick to notice their body language and behaviors.
one large reason as to why nari is reserved, is because she refuses to step out of her comfort zone. for as long as she can remember, she spent her time reading textbooks and getting yelled at. she never had the time to have social interactions like many other children. thus, when someone wants to be a friend of hers, nari feels weird and kills the conversation. she despises the feeling of being uncomfortable and is afraid of getting emotionally attached to someone who, ultimately, leaves.
nari is a very structured person. she enjoys following a schedule and planning out her days. outfits, meals, destinations, and whatnot would be determined the night before. as being a psychiatrist goes, she follows protocol precisely and does not make a mistake. if she happens to make a mistake or does not follow her plans, she feels uncomfortable and gets unhappy. she is also hard-working and patient, believing good things will only come to those who try their hardest and wait.
if she were to get herself medically diagnosed, she would be said to have ocd (obsessive-compulsive disorder) and depression. nari would have to leave for work at least 20 minutes earlier because she has to lock the door 37 times. she has to turn off electrical appliances 12 times. the objects and appliances around her house and working area have to be aligned in what she claims to be "perfect". her diagnostic reports, letters, notes, etc. has to be checked 9 times before another individual can see. she is aware of these habits and fully understands what it would be diagnosed as, however she denies it; she denies that she suffers from depression and ocd, saying it's normal for people with high stress levels to feel that way. in simpler terms: nari can diagnose others but not herself.
she is a compulsive liar to others and herself. nari finds herself lying about her daily habits and her overall well-being. "yes, i am doing well. work isn't too stressful. i have been eating well and have made many friends." before, this was done so people would not pester her and pretend to care about her. now, this is done so she will slowly believe she is actually doing fine. however, her lies are slowly destroying herself physically and mentally.
likes & dislikes & trivia
likes:
- food, especially spicy things that are mouth-numbing.
- alcohol, as a form of solace.
- sleep, however she does not get much of it so she treasures it like gold.
- running, however only runs indoor on a treadmill.
- the smell and sound of rain.
dislikes:
- crowded and loud areas.
- messy/disorganized places.
- bright colors: yellow, orange, pink, etc.
- individuals who act cutesy/fake.
additional:
- relies on coffee and energy drinks heavily.
- as mentioned above, she does not get to sleep much. reason is becaue of her job and she suffers from insomnia.
- she has dated two guys before. both had ended because of her inability to open up and create conversation. her last relationship was 8 years ago and had remained single since.
- needless to say, nari is indeed a .
the conflicts.
family background
lin nari was born and raised by her chinese father and korean mother. she was raised in a low-income family, relying on government money to stay alive. therefore, she was raised to believe that money meant happiness.
the lin family moved from taipei, taiwan, to jeju-do, south korea, when nari was 3 years old. her mother renounced her korean citizenship, thus allowing them to stay there. due to government requirements, nari officially became a korean citizen when she turned 20 years old.
conflicting the loving couple facade her parents presented, they hated each other more than anything. they got into arguments daily over the silliest things and often times, this led to not speaking for days. her father would pack his bags and claim he's staying at a hotel for a few nights, but it was clear he had a mistress. it was a wonder why they never got a divorce and remained married 'til this day.
her family, specifically her mother, judged her for every little thing she did. she had high expectations from nari and wanted to raise her to be an intelligent, independent, and mannered lady. her mother believed in the system of being physical as a punishment, so she resulted to hitting her own daughter when things went astray. her mother would take her anger out on nari rather than loving her one and only daughter. when things got rough at work or she just finished a fight with her husband, she would yell at her daughter. "i yell at her so she will open her eyes and not marry a bastard-husband like him," was what she told herself.
her father was rarely home so he did not judge her as often as her mother would. when he was home, however, he would constantly compare nari to her older brother, eui-tae, and degrade her. not only did he degrade her as a person but he degraded her because of her gender, claiming women are "good-for-nothings" and "cannot achieve in their lifetime".
nari did, however, receive moments of happiness in her life. her older brother, lin eui-tae, provided her with what her parents never did. he gave her love and protected her. when he was around and heard his mother's loud voice, he automatically knew his sister was going to receive a beating. he rushed to wherever they were and covered for nari. when she was afraid and found herself walking into his room late at night, he stayed with her and comforted her until the sun shined. he was there for her when things got rough and always reassured her he was never going to abandon her.
connections
lin eui-tae : sadly, nari's closest connection is with her older brother, eui-tae. he spent 11 years (4 years college, 4 years medical school, and 3 years residency) to fulfill his dream of becoming a pediatrician. he now works at a hospital in busan, south korea. he is older by 6 years.
not only does she consider eui-tae her older brother, but she considers him her best friend as well. having been born first and spending her childhood with eui-tae, nari learned to depend on him. throughout her educational career, she seeked advice from her brother who was aiming to be a pediatrician. he understood the stress level caused by college courses and residency, so he looked out for his younger sister. with that said, he was always there for her when times got rough. eui-tae knows every nooks and crannies of his sister, including her depression. however, he is unaware of her habits of self-harming. he believes her when she claims her way of handling her depression is through healthy habits, like physical exercise.
compared to nari, he is carefree and happy. a natural-born einstein; he never studied and worked as hard as his sister. eui-tae was automatically loved and praised because he was a man who carried the family's surname.
the story
it wasn't uncommon for people to hear the amount of psychiatrists who were dissatisfied with their job. with the amount of data collected and statistics published, many are aware that the stress and suicide rates, especially in females, are slowly increasing in this medical profession. however, this was only a theory; no one has proven that psychiatrists and suicide has a correlation. lin nari was not an exception to this thesis.
a large amount of her stress was caused by her working environment. on a daily basis, nari received negative characteristics from her patients and coworkers. often times, she would experience moments of "burnout", or exhaustion, due to long working hours (12+ hours shifts). nari, similar to other psychiatrists, were more prone to feel patient-related burdens compared to other professions. so she not only understood and diagnosed her patients but she felt their troubles on a personal level.
other contributing factors that shaped her into who she is include: her family members, journey throughout high school, college, and medical school, high expectations, lack of sleep, and lack of social life.
other contributing factors that shaped her into who she is include: her family members, journey throughout high school, college, and medical school, high expectations, lack of sleep, and lack of social life.
many would beg to differ upon hearing that nari feels secluded and lost in life. how can a psychiatrist, who understands everyone's behaviors and emotions, feel excluded? how can a girl who had her entire life planned out since the age of five, feel lost? to answer those questions--nari planned her future so precisely she lost the satisfaction and enjoyment life contained. she indulged in textbooks rather than the beautiful nature outside her window. she spoke to teachers rather than her classmates. she purposely alienated herself for what she thought was "happiness".
To nari's dismay, as she got older, she realized money does not equal happiness. she understood the journey she embarked on was not happiness when she graduated from medical school. however, at that moment it was too late for her to change her ways and start a new journey. she developed a mental block that hindered her development. she missed so many opportunities in life that she regretted every action she had ever made. this resulted in negative thoughts and self-hatred. in addition to that, her stress levels from work overwhelmed her daily existence. she felt a larger desire to alienate herself from others, reminding herself she is unloved and unworthy. she seeks solace from self-harm and alcohol. oddly enough, a tingling sensation and warm blood comforted her more than anything.
key people
lin eui-tae : as much as nari loves and depends on eui-tae, he is a contributing factor to her misery. he is unaware of this, though. despite helping her immensely and aiding her through her troubles, his status and natural-born talents caused her to feel inferior. he was smarter and far more successful than nari will ever be. this caused constant comparison and ridicule from her family and peers.
mr. & mrs. lin : parents of nari. contrary to loving and nurturing parents, mr. and mrs. lin only provided shelter, clothing, education, and food for nari. they engraved a mental note in nari's life: "no medical job? you're a useless piece of ." when times get rough, images of her parents come to mind and the scars she created because of them. she blames her parents for who she grew up to be.
mr. & mrs. lin : parents of nari. contrary to loving and nurturing parents, mr. and mrs. lin only provided shelter, clothing, education, and food for nari. they engraved a mental note in nari's life: "no medical job? you're a useless piece of ." when times get rough, images of her parents come to mind and the scars she created because of them. she blames her parents for who she grew up to be.
the private words.
questions, comments, etc.
hello! please excuse any grammatical errors. this was written from 3-6am. i did go over it multiple times but i couldn't find any errors, so if you happen to stumble upon any, please let me know. also, if there are any parts/sections that need further elaboration, let me know. other than that, i would like to thank you for reading my application and i wish you luck on your story!
scene requests, suggestions.
n/a.
the passcode
goes here.
layout by juntaek · do not replicate
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