The sky must be lonely.

Clanking steel railings, intercom blasting off reminders, security guard wandering around, keeping everything in place, all of it makes up an unpleasant music to one’s ears.

The train station is bustling with commuters, filling in the waiting area, rusty steel benches full of students chattering about their day, suppressed squeaks, businessmen in suit, old ladies from work, some civilian wanting to go home before dark, Luhan leans against the wall, neatly pressed skirt a bit ruffled.

Familiar black hair showcases one pretty nape, Luhan stares until he reaches his friends, immediately joining the conversation. The fluttery feeling is back that Luhan has to tear her eyes away as if looking is a crime. She places her palm to her chest, feeling the fast thumping heart under the soft cotton of her blouse, and then she breaks into a small smile.

It happens almost every day.

--

She’s running late, the teacher pulled her for help. Being the class representative, Luhan has obligations in school and one of which is delivering activity notebooks to the faculty room. Mr. Cha asked her to help organize the ledgers, Luhan couldn’t say no.

“Ugh, I’m running late!” Luhan hastily climb down the stairs, cheeks flushed, bangs matted against her forehead, long brown hair swaying from left to right, skirt riding up as she moves, boys couldn’t help but take a small peek of what’s hidden under and she’s too oblivious to notice. Luhan sneaks a glance to her wrist watch, 7:45pm.

Three steps until she reach the flat form, she catches a familiar mop of black hair, tan skin barely covered by the white school uniform. Luhan’s breathe hitches, her lips forms a smile but was quick to tug it in a frown, people might think wrongly of her.

The train arrives few minutes later, Luhan slants her eyes to the side whenever she gets the chance, trying to make the most of the stolen moments she hold precious inside her heart.

Zip. The metal door automatically opens, the people rushes inside before they miss the train. Luhan sighs, she’s got to go. “Bye,” Luhan mutters to no one, eyes watching the tall figure longingly until their eyes meet in a split second.

Luhan splutters unattractively, the back of her hand fast to cover and flushed cheeks. Crap! She is the first to look away—but the pull to angle her eyes back is a little bit too much.

Staccato heartbeats.

That guy… he’s still looking.

--

She’s been covering her face with the book she personally bought for that purpose. Luhan feels so shy every time she steps in the flat form.

The train arrives.

What happened last week—it gives her heart a tight squeeze.

--

A few stops left, Luhan has to endure the rush. The train is particularly full this day, students mostly. Luhan tries to avoid getting pushed as much as she could but getting enough space to breath is next to impossible inside the train when it’s rush hour.

“E-excuse me,” Luhan squishes her small form against the clashing body, “Excuse,” she moves forward, uniform drenched in sweat, muttering apologies and excuses as she pass by.

One bulky man nudged her aside as she tries to reach for the less crowded space, hitting her shoulder with great impact. Luhan trips on her feet and nearly stumbles to down if it wasn’t for a hand who immediately grabbed her arm, hauling her back up. “Are you alright?”

When their eyes met, Luhan beats herself mentally for blushing. Luhan stutters incoherent words before springing out something comprehensible to average human intelligence, “I-I-I'm okay, I’m fine. I’m fine!” she took a step back and flapped her hands to emphasize her words making it more convincing. Her heart goes dugeun dugeun again, Luhan calms it down the best she can.

“You sure?” deep brown orbs looks so pretty Luhan is just centimeters away from swooning. “Hey,” he lands a hand over Luhan’s shoulder, light touch surprisingly burning against the cotton of her school uniform. The latter chokes a breath, hand immediately covering her stuttering lips.

What to do? The pulse in her ears is too loud she couldn’t hear anything other than that. What to do?

Her saving grace was the abrupt stop of the train, intercom booming through the speakers, giving instructions as the train stops over another bustling station; Luhan gets off without second thoughts only to realize her big mistake.

She is two stations away from her stop.

--

Luhan prefers sitting alone in a corner, watching the world move in every second, enjoying the small piece of heaven life offers her, smiling secretly as that guy drops a coin for a can of Royal. He bends down to pick it up, clicking the tin cap to open it, then taking a swig until he’s satisfied with his thirst.

Does he like drinking orange flavored soda juice? Luhan wonders more about the guy with pretty nape and set deep brown eyes. Luhan gulps the lump forming at the back of as he finishes his drink, crumpling the can then throwing it to the garbage can. How can someone look so cool while drinking soda? Clearly, he isn’t human! Luhan stuffs her knuckles to and decides to look away. Her face is steaming hot.

A suppressed squeal slips from .

Jongin chuckles at the back of his hand, cute.

--

“Ah, that last question though!” Chanyeol’s face involuntary scrunches comically just by remembering his grueling time aiding his brain from the Algebra exams, “How did you solve that, Luhannie? I’ve been drooling over my papers while raking the formulas I studied last night.”

Luhan chuckles, “You use sine cosine over the calculator, dummy. ‘Cher asked us to bring calculator for a reason, you know.” Chanyeol slaps a hand over his face, dragging it down as Luhan laughs more. He realizes his mistake.

“I thought its mental calculation! Baekhyun said—ah, that idiot, he tricked me!” they both settle themselves in a bench while waiting for the train, back uncomfortably resting against the rusty metal. It wasn’t as crowded as yesterday or the other day as it is currently, perhaps because it is already past rush hour and Luhan is hours late than usual, thanks to Chanyeol for making her wait. “He told me using calculator is cheating!” Chanyeol has his puppy eyes staring at Luhan, both hands clamped over the smaller’s boney shoulders and Luhan couldn’t help to pat Chanyeol’s hair with her free hand, lithe fingers sliding just enough to cup Chanyeol’s cheek, “Just do better next time, okay? I’ll teach you so don’t worry.” she says and Chanyeol beams so bright.

“Yes, yes! Thanks a lot, Luhannie!” Chanyeol pulls her for a hug, nose digging to her hair, not forgetting to compliment how nice she smells. Luhan slaps his chest playfully.

One can of orange flavored soda clanks on the floor and rolls down just under the bench, one clenched fist, one constricting chest.

--

Luhan looks around, fall passed as quick as winter dries out of snow and now its spring—she can’t find him through the crowd.

Though she sees him one day… holding out an umbrella for a girl.

--

Luhan sips slowly from her small box of banana milk, eyes peeking through her lashes as she watches that familiar guy standing along the crowded train. His long legs seem to go on forever and his hair seems longer than before. From his side, Luhan can make out a small form—the girl from before.

They’re talking, laughing with each other.

It hurts.

She rips her eyes away and pushed the dreadful feeling boiling inside her chest. Of course, he’s not single. It’s just Luhan thinking of it that way. What’s wrong with being selfishly hopeful of something near impossible? Luhan is stupid for being blind and dreaming unattainable things.

Luhan smiles bitterly with her trembling lips.

Her phone chimes from her side pocket. Chanyeol beeped her, ‘sis! I’m bringing Kyunghee home. Is it alright if you go somewhere for a while? Pleaseeeeee!!!!’

She can already imagine Chanyeol pouting at her while rubbing his hands. He always does that when asking something from her.

Sure, twins do each other favors, right? <3

--

The stars shines particularly bright tonight and the moon is giving out its full glow. There are no clouds curtaining the night sky. It’s so pretty.

Luhan slips his bag down on her side, soft brown locks swaying with the wind and the lamp post barely illuminates that part of the park. Crickets barely make any noise and the rustling trees aren’t a threat to disrupt the serenity of the place. Luhan loves spending her time here—mostly when she wants to think.

Chanyeol rarely ask her favors, it is Luhan who snoop various request from her twin brother. He buys her napkins in broad daylight, protects her from suitors, do her laundries even when all she does is lie on her bed and read magazines. Giving small time of happiness to her brother isn’t enough to compensate from all the things he did for her.

“I’m happy he has Kyunghee,” she says, looking up at the sky. Somehow, it calms her heart and clears her mind. “She makes him happy—“

Happy?

Luhan slides her hand to her chest, fast beating heart thumping steadily against her rib cage that it might come out if she doesn’t calm it down.

Happy?

Flashbacks flooded her mind. Those smiles, that genuine happiness evident in his face as she talks to him inside the train…

Happy?

Is that guy… happy?

If he is indeed happy… why would Luhan herself in between them? If you love someone, you should wish for his or her happiness and that is what Luhan plans to do. Also, that guy doesn’t know who she is or if she even exist. There’s no point of dreaming to be with him… right?

Luhan blows air to her bangs and tucks her lower lip between her teeth. “This is so frustrating,” she muttered to herself. “And I’m thinking of Chanyeol and Kyunghee doing the thing—argh! I shouldn’t be wallowing in misery!” she grabbed her hair in frustration.

Luhan breathes puff of air, pulling her bag to her thighs. She looks up to the sky once again and watches the dark clouds gathering in thick black. It wasn’t there a moment ago, the stars are shining earlier and now, the clouds are looming up above that it covers the stars and Luhan worries her lips—a habit when she’s having an intuition, it’s going to rain.

“—oh crap!” as soon as she picked her bag and swung it back to her shoulder, Luhan gathered her feet and dashed to find a place to take refuge against the growing pitter patter of the rain. Droplets hits slowly against her as she run but in a few seconds, gone the gentleness and was replaced by the furious water droplets soaking Luhan wet.

It feels so cold.

She should’ve brought an umbrella but Luhan guesses it would stand useless against the rain this strong coupled by the wind.

Her legs brought her into the center of the park. Luhan was aiming to hail a cab home—forget about Chanyeol, but she lost her sense of direction the moment the rain started. Instead of the street filled with establishments and transportations, Luhan found herself jogging up the hill to the old abandoned Buddhist temple where people used to go when they wanted to pray.

The steps were steep and the stairway is slippery. Good thing Luhan reaches the top without tripping or falling down.

Luhan almost runs out of breath as she bends down to rest. The rain is still strong, probably stronger than earlier. Luhan slowly calms her beating heart and watches the slosh of water pouring from the roof. It’s dark with no lampshade to light the place. It terrifies her a bit.

She shivers at a particular strong gust of wind. Luhan found her nose itching, few droplets of water cascading from her hair down to her face. Then she sneezes loud, once and then twice.

Something rattles beside her.

Luhan shrieks, jumping on her seat. She immediately grabbed her bag for protection.

And then a small rectangular light pops out from the dark, illuminating a fraction of the being in the dark. Luhan’s breath hitches.

“A-Are you—oh,” Luhan shivers from the deep voice. The light moves and she held on to her breath, stomach swarmed by unwanted feelings.

Jongin looks at her with mouth partially open.

Luhan’s own trembles a bit that she has to cover it with her hand. She should also thank that there are no lights around, her reddening face is concealed.

Jongin scoots a bit, there was a flash of lightning and then strong sound of pouring rain. Luhan could make out the guy’s hair is damp, blazer was taken off and was resting on the floor, white button ups wet that it hugs his body. Luhan gulps and backs away to gain some distance from the guy until her body hits the wall of the temple. “Are you okay?” he shyly asked, awkwardly leaning back after noticing that Luhan puts a good distance between them. She’s afraid, he deduced.

She slowly nods, “The rain is strong,” she gathered her legs to her chest and hides her face from Jongin. The latter smiles a bit, tearing his eyes a bit from Luhan to watch the rain. “Yeah. The sky is crying so hard.” he said. “It must be lonely.”

Luhan says nothing but eyes him warily.

“This is my secret hideout,” Jongin said as he lowers his phone down but the light doesn’t fade, “I go here when I want to think. But I guess it’s no secret now that you’ve found it too.” he chuckles, eyes crinkling a bit as he scratches his chin awkwardly.

Luhan hiccups, scrambling in a hurry. “O-o-oh!!! I didn’t mean to—if you want I can—I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’ll go—“

Jongin laughs and the insect swarming inside Luhan’s stomach seems to multiply. She blushes when Jongin looks up to her, a flash of lightning made him so bright and handsome. Luhan thinks she’s dreaming, being this close—she used to watch him from a distance.

“It’s okay, really.”

Luhan stares at him.

Jongin smiles, wondering why she’s alone without her boyfriend, feeling mad that some guy would leave her alone at this godly hour, an irresponsible guy that pisses Jongin so much.

There’s nothing much to say. They stayed silent; the only sound echoing is the harsh rain against the roof and the occasional thunder that makes Luhan jump in shock. It was all dead silence when Jongin speaks again. “Your boyfriend, he didn’t walk you home?” The tone of his voice speaks something that Luhan can’t decipher, mad perhaps but he’s smiling a little in contrary.

“I don’t have one.” Luhan answers, lowering her head to avoid Jongin’s calculating eyes. She doesn’t have one; Chanyeol frights them even before they could talk to her. Luhan doesn’t mind at all because she has her eyes set on one person alone. “But I saw you one time, with a tall guy…” Jongin trails. The unwanted feeling gone in his chest as if a boulder vanished against his back.

Jongin doesn’t know if he’ll smile for feeling relieved or he’ll cry for feeling guilty of thinking wrongly of her. Yet he found himself smiling like a fool while watching the rain. He can feel Luhan’s eyes boring on him.

Luhan releases a shaky breath. Why is this guy—Luhan bites her lips hard. She thought he doesn’t notice her. Luhan thought he doesn’t know her existence. She’s happy. So happy that he knows her, that he looks at her, that he notices her.

“U-uhm, that guy—“ Jongin turns to face her, “T-that guy… he’s my twin brother.” Luhan looks everywhere but Jongin, blushing. She owes him no explanation but she really wanted to clear the misunderstanding…

“Oh,” Jongin puffs out softly.

The rain is still strong. The wind makes it colder. Luhan shivers again. Jongin noticed it and handed her something he got inside his bag, a white shirt. Luhan looks at him with confused eyes then Jongin smiles again. “Cover yourself, this shirt is dry. You can use it.”

The wind gushes again. Jongin sighs when she didn’t respond, he moves to grab Luhan’s wrist, handing her the shirt. Luhan can feel his cold hand, pricking her skin with the coldness. She looks at him and their eyes met—just like that one time in the train station. She widens her eyes and look away but takes a side glance at Jongin instead.

Jongin can feel his stomach twisting. He chuckles to himself. “Cute.”

Luhan splutters, holding tightly on the shirt. Jongin returns to his previous position but the smile remains in his lips.

They both waited for the rain to stop. The atmosphere is awkward, filled with secret glances and fast racing heartbeats. Luhan couldn’t be happier, even though they remain stranger to each other, she’s happy. Luhan is happy even though tomorrow… or the day after, he’ll be appearing again back in the train station with that girl walking beside him.

Jongin stands up from the floor. He dust the dirt gathered on his pants. The rain stopped and Luhan watches him arrange his things. He checked his phone first before pocketing it. “I should get going.” he said.

Luhan scrambles on her feet. She grabbed her bag and the guy’s shirt. She bowed to him three times while muttering alternating ‘thank you’ and ‘I'm sorry’. Jongin raises a hand to stop her but she bows once again with her arms extended to hand back the damp white shirt. “T-Thank you! Thank you!”

“It’s nothing,” Jongin places his hand inside both of his pockets coolly. “Just return the shirt the next time we meet.” Luhan freezes before raising her head to look at him one more time. She looks confused. “Give it back to me next time. You already know my hideout.” He smiles that one smile that makes Luhan’s heart leap out of her chest.

“B-B-But—but that girl might think wrongly if I give this shirt back to you!” Luhan blurted.

Jongin moves to fully face her. The sky is still filled with dark clouds and it might rain again but this time, the moon is shyly peeking from the clouds, lighting the place and Luhan watched Jongin’s face under the moonlight.

“I don’t think Hyoyeon would mind.”

Luhan clutches the shirt to cover half of her face and hesitates, “But isn’t she your uhm… isn’t she your…” she looks away only to hear that guy laughing. Luhan’s face scrunches in displease.

“She’s my neighbor.” Jongin said when his laugh fades, Luhan’s face reddens in embarrassment. “She won’t get mad if you return that shirt to me.”

“But I though…”

Jongin’s lips curves and his eyes crinkle, reaching out to pat Luhan’s hair. “I notice you too. You’re too obvious but I find it cute. Don’t worry, I’m pretty obvious myself but that girl from the train station is too oblivious to notice. Besides, she always looks down.” She lowers her head, lips tucked in between her teeth again. “I hope the next time we meet, she’s aware that I look at her too.”

When she says nothing, Jongin retracts his hand and turns his back, ready to leave. “I didn’t expect you to find me in this temple but I'm happy to get this close to you. Maybe I should thank the sky for crying.” Luhan smiles shyly at him even though Jongin can’t see it. She hugs the shirt to her chest. “We should get going.”

“Yes.” she softly answers. The fluttery feeling feels good for the first time.

Jongin wishes for tomorrow to come already. He wishes that it’s afternoon already. That girl in the train station, she’ll come and give back his shirt, a reason to keep her around. He smiles to the moon, thank you.

“My name’s Lu Han,” that girl murmurs out of nowhere.

“Kim Jongin,” he leans back, “and you’re always welcome to my secret hideout.”

They’re no strangers now.

--
will start updating Root Evil, Laugh (But don't weep, you look ugly), and others. also if some of you knows S Talks Back, i'll update that one too.
thanks for reading TT.TT
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