To my beautiful best friend, continue dreaming big & loving the night sky, 

Author's point of view: 

There are no words or actions needed to be said. There was no way of pretending like it didn't exist. There was no way avoiding that thought. You love him. That is all. You're love for that boy was more than anything you can imagine. He is the reason why you stay up at night thinking about him. His captivating smile. His crescent eyes. His deep voice that echoed in you head. His tall slender figure that strolls down the school hallways everyday during the week. You easily knew you were in love with Oh Sehun. There was no change in heart.

Late at night when the world was sleeping you would stay up and think about him. You wished every night that he would think of you too. He would think of you the same way you thought of him. You prayed to God and hoped for the courage to tell Sehun you loved him. You would crawl under your sheets for warmth. You would imagine him next to you telling you  everything would be okay with his deep sleepy voice. He would wrap his strong arms around your waist and pull you closer. He would bid you a goodnight kiss.

Reality was harsher then your dreams. It always has been. You would get out of bed in the middle of the night and walk out to your balcony to look at the stars. Every night you would wait for a shooting star and hope to make a wish. A wish that would change everything for you and him. 

Day by day it hurt you more. No words escaped your lips as you tried speaking to him. All you had was kind smiles and waves. 

"Hana." It was a cold Thursday morning at school. You were sitting with your best friend Hana Park in the college lounge at school. "Hmm?" She let out, still engrossed in her favorite magazine. She continues flipping through pages of endless fashion articles. "Can I tell you something?" 

"Yeah." She answers uneagier. She crinkles her nose at some outifit an idol was wearing. "Do you remember when I told you I had a crush on someone.." Your voice trails off. Hana looks up fixing her small framed spectacles on her face. "You mean Sehun right?" 

"Shhhhh." You whisper shyly. "Keep your voice down. I don't want his friends listening or anyone." Your gaze went to his group of friends; Yixing, Kai, Suho and Chanyeol who were sitting a few seats away from both of you. Luckily they didn't look back. 

Hana covers with the palms of her hands. She lets out a small chuckle. "I am sorry." She whispers back. You nod back and smile. "I am only letting it pass this one time. Next time you yell out I will tell Chanyeol about your small crush on him!" You blackmail her back. She closes her magazine and tosses it to the side. "What do you want to tell me about blue?" 

Throughout the years you and Hana made up code names for both of your crushes. It was an simple way to keep your crushes' names hidden from everyone else. It was also a great way to talk about them pubicly without anyone knowing. You two also had names for you enemies like trash, malificent etc. This wasn't the case though. 

"____________? What do you want to tell me?" Hana asks bringing you back from your own thoughts. She waves her hand infront of your face. "Earth to __________. Come on answer me bro!" A lump forms in your throat. You try to swallow hard. "I-I-" Your eyes begin to get watery. 

"What happened now?" Hana asks in annoyance. She sits back crossing her arms. "Did he wave at you or something?" 

Your close friends and family knew you were a very dramatic person. They knew that you would get emotional over the most simple things such as dog movies, or presenting in small groups of students. You were very dramatic and emotional. 

"Nothing." You take a deep breath. "I just give up." 

"You give up on what?" Hana asks leaning in. You now have all of her attention. "Fine then if you don't want to tell me then don't!" She grabs her magazine and flips the page.

"No!" You take the magazine from her hands and throw it in your book bag. Hana pouts. "It not that."

"Then what is it?" She leans her head to the side.

"I can't do it anymore." You lay your head on the table.

"Can't do what?" Hana asks unsure

"I can't tell blue that I like him. It is just so hard." You answer back.

"Why don't you want to tell him?" Hana picks on a few strands of your hair. She leans in and smells it. "I thought you made up your mind last week to tell him." 

"I did but now I can't." You slap her hand away from your hair. "He doesn't like me back. He doesn't feel the same way." 

"And how would you know that?" 

"Because!" Your voice becomes louder "I know he doesn't. I can feel it! I am not pretty or smart. I am not like those girls who like him. They are all tall and beautiful." 

Hana lets out a desperate sigh. "What makes you think he likes them? Maybe he get annoyed by them. You never know. You are prettier then all of them anyways."

You believe Hana is just trying to make you feel better. You think she is lying just to get your self-esteem up. You faintly smile at her. "I have no chance Hana. You can say all you want but I give up. He will never notice me no matter what. It just how my story ends." The end of the free period class ends before Hana can say anything. You pack up your stuff and bolt for the doors. You don't want to talk about it no more. It hurts too much. 

That night when you go home you look up at the dark sky. You sigh and let the endless tears stream down your face. No one wipes them away for you. You crawl under you sheets and embrace yourself tightly. You don't pray that night. 

"Hey you okay?" Hana asks taking her seat next to you at the usual table in the corner of the lunch room. "You still sad?" 

You shake your head. "I am okay. Don't worry." You lie to your best friend. Your gaze up from you lunch. Sehun walks down the cafteria holding his tray. He smiles kindly at the girl who walks up next to him. She has long blonde hair. Her eyes are as blue as the sea. Her smile is captivating. Her name is Jade. As much as you hate to admit it, they look good together. 

You continue starring at them. Sehun looks back at you and smiles. You blink a few time and your stomach turns upside down. You don't smile back. His smile slowly fades away. 

He walks over to his table of friends along with Jade by his side.

You look back down at your food for the rest of lunch. 

"_________? Right?" Chanyeol eagerly asks. He leans against the locker next to yours. You nod your head. "I am Chanyeol." he extends his hand. You shake it politely. "Nice to meet you Chanyeol." You smile faintly.

"I have heard alot about you." He utters out.

"You have?" You ask in confusion.

"Sehun talks alot about you." 

"He does?" 

He nods his head. Suddenly a smaller boy shows up and hits Chanyeol on the shoulder. "Yeol shut up!" He looks over at you with a cheesy smile. "The name is Baekhyun Byun." He reaches in and kisses your hand. You blush a bit. 

"Nice to meet you." You shut your locker. "I need to go." 

"What are you guys doing?" You turn to your left and see none other then Sehun approaching you and the boys. He has a stoic face expression. 

"Welll..." Baekhyun coughs. "We were going to tell her what you told us!"

"No you won't!" Sehun barks back. Your feet turn to jelly. What are they talking about? 

"Fine then but you tell her!" Chanyeol pulls Baekhyun under his arm. "If you don't then we will." 

Sehun rolls his eyes. 

"We will be leaving you two love birds alone." Baekhyun teases. He winks at you and walks off with a laughing Chanyeol. Are they teasing you because they know? Is this a prank? 

You and Sehun watch as Chanyeol and Baekhyun disappear down the hallway. Your palms begin to get sweaty. 

"Want to go walk somewhere else?" Sehun breaks the silence. You nod. 

You two continue walking in silence. You both reach the football field. 

"So how have you been?" He asks.

"Uh good you?" You look down at your feet. 

"Good too." He answers coldly. 

It becomes silent once again. You two continue taking laps around the field. 

Sehun coughs. "________?" He tugs your arm.

"Yeah?" 

"I need to tell you something." He looks down at you and moves closer to you. "It is really hard but just listen to me will you?" 

You nod your head nervously. 

"For the past year I got to meet you. At first I thought you hated me. I got to know you. And I really liked getting to talk to you." His voice trails off. "I don't know how to say this." He covers his mouth and laughs. You just look at him. 

"The more I talked to you, the more I thought of you.The more I thought of you the more I realized that my feelings for you grew. And know I know" He locks his eyes with yours. Your heart begins to beat faster and faster "I love you." 

He wraps his arms around your shoulders. He pulls you close to his body. Slowly you wrap your arms around him. "I love you too." He lets out a chuckle. You smile. If this is a dream please don't let me wake up. 

Late that night you sit back in your bed. You smile fondly. You still can't believe that he went up to you and said I love you. Your grab your pillow and hug it tightly. Your phone rings. You grab your phone. A smile spreads across your lips. 

"Hello?" The voice booms over the speaker.

"Sehun?" You prop up from your bed. "Why are you calling so late?" 

"Look at your window." You sense he is smiling. 

"What?" You looks over at you balcony. 

"Just go to your balcony." He hangs up. You walk over to your balcony. You open the doors and walk out. Sehun looks up at you. He smiles with his eyes. "Hey _________!" He waves. 

"What are you doing here?" You ask quietly "You might wake up my parents!" 

"I just want to see you!" He bickers back. He jumps up to the tree. You watch as he carefully lands on the porch of your room on the seocnd floor. "See. I can do it!" 

You slap him across the shoulder. "What are you doing here?" 

"Like I said I just want to see you." He answers back. He looks up at the sky. "Wow it is so beautiful isn't it?" 

You look up at the sky as well. The stars are glimmering brighter then ever. The dark sky is now replaced with dark colors of blue and purple. "The sky is always beauitful." You whisper. Sehun nods. "The sky is more beautiful now that I am here with you."  "Cheesy!" You chuckle. You grab the small ladder placed in the corner of your balcony. and press it against the wall. "The sky looks better up there." You point to the roof. "Want to join me?"

"Wow the sky does look beautiful tonight!" Sehun exclaims. You fold your arms against you chest. "Told you." Sehun sits next to you.

"Do you always look up at the sky?" Sehun asks. He glances over at you.

"Yeah every night." You answer.  "The sky is what I admire the most. The night sky helps me feel better. It helps me reflect on everything. It gives me hope." 

Sehun smiles. "Me too." He slowly reaches in to hold your hand. You jerk a bit at first but after a few seconds you feel at ease. He wraps his long slender fingers around yours. You feel safe. and happy. The rest of the late night you lay under the night sky and talk endlessly about random topics. 

Dawn is about to break in. "Aishh I have to go home." Sehun scratches the back of his head. "My mom will get mad if I don't go home." 

"You don't have a curfew?" You ask raising an eyebrow. Sehun shakes his head. "I am as free as a bird." You laugh a bit. 

He grabs his phone and tucks it in his pocket. You take off his jacket. "Don't." He states "Keep it please." You nod and wrap it around your shoulders. You follow Sehun down the ladder back to your room's balcony. As you take your last step Sehun mutters your name.

"What?" He approaches you breaking distance between both of you. He leans in and closes his eyes. He pulls you closer to him and presses his lips against yours. No wonders can explain how you feel inside. The world around you stops. After a while you break the kiss. "Sehun you should get going." He pulls you in for a hug. "Hold on a minute." He rests his head on top of your head. 

You watch as Sehun waves goodbye. You smile and wave back. He smiles back at you and walks down the street. You watch as his lean figure disappears down the road. Dawn breaks in and you go back to your room to sleep or at least try. 

Two days pass and Sehun doesn't call. You text him but he doesn't respond. You call him from your home phone but he doesn't answer. His phone keeps sending you to his voicemail. As you sit back in the living room you hear someone knock on the door. You walk over to the door and open it. 

"Chanyeol?" You ask. He forces a smile but it doesn't seem so genuine like usual. "What are you doing here? Are you okay?" You press yourself agunst the door frame. 

"____________" Chanyeol calls out your name in a pleading voice. "I-I-" He struggles to speak out. He reaches in his backpack. He hands you a small brown leather notebook.  On the cover it has Sehun's name carved.  

"What's this?" You ask hesitantly.  You take a step forward and grab the notebook. "Is this a story?"

"No." Chanyeol struggles to answer. He wipes the tears falling down his roune cheeks. "Sehun...he wanted me to give it to you in case something happened to him." 

Your eyes widen. "What happened? Did he move?" You take a few steps back. Did Sehun ditch you for someone else? Did he move? The last thing that crosses your mind is that he moved. You heart beats fast. And your breathing becomes unstable. 

Chanyeol shakes his head. "No." Chanyeol answers. "I am sorry." 

"Chanyeol! Just tell me!" You hiss back unpatient.  

"He is gone ___________. Sehun left us. He is dead. He didn't make it." He looks down at you with flowing tears. 

You feel your insides ripping apart. "No! Tell me you are lying!" You scream out. "No no this isn't real! Please!"

Chanyeol grabs your shoulders and pulls you close to him. "You have to accept it. This is real. He left us." 

"But how?" You scream into his chest. Chanyeol wraps his arms around your shoulders. 

"I don't know." 

You burst out in tears. And cry for the rest of the day and night. 

A week passes. You come back from his funeral. Inside you feel empty. You lock yourself in your room and crawl in your bed. You remember all those times you had encounters with Sehun. You can still clearly remember the day you noticed him for the first time: he was walking down the hallway with his friends. He glanced over at you and a smile creeped on his lips. His teeth glistened infront of you.  You blushed and smiled back. After that day you couldn't help but admire his beauty. 

You would stay up thinking about your conversations with him at school.  Or think about his shy waves down the hallways. Everytime you thought about him it would give you butterflies.  You imagined cuddling with him or kissing him deeply. You would wish upon a star and hope he would do the same. 

But now it gone...

You wake up from your deep slumbers. You look over at tye digital clock on your nightstand; 12:34 pm. The night is quiet. And all you can hear is the crickets chirping. You swing your legs off the bed and slide into your comfy shoes. You walk out to your balcony and look up at the dark sky. 

The stars shine as radiant as the night last night with Sehun. Your heart aches in pain thinking about him. It has been more then a week since he left. You walk back to your room to grab his jacket. You cover your fragile body and smell his cologne.  It lingers. You press your head aginst it and shiver in fear. You walk around your room in circles,  you notice the leather notebook sitting vulnerable on the shelf. 

You slowly walk over to it and grab it. You remember Chanyeol telling you at the funeral something about Sehun wanting you to read it. You walk out to the balcony. You grab the ladder and set it up to go to the roof. 

You slowly climb it making sure you don't make any noise that can disturb anyone.  Once you reach the roof you sit back and open the journal to the first page.

________, 

You probably have this journal because I am not here anymore or we are married. Anyways I just want you to know that this is the story of us. I hope we can share this together.  

Oh Sehun

You turn the page and continue reading. The rest of night you continue reading through his journal. It breaks you inside badly. The night is still young and you get to one of his last journal entries:

____________, 

I can't believe it! I finally told you how I feel! And the best part is that you feel the same way! I am in love with you __________. I am so happy that I got tell you. You have made me the happiest person in this world.  Thank you.  

Oh Sehun

You wip away your tears and let out a small chuckle.  You imagine Sehun in his room writing this entry with a smile that reaches to his eyes. Somehow your heart feels at ease imagining it. You turn the page. 

______________, 

I am having surgery today. I am scared. I am afraid that I won't be there with you anymore. I am afraid that I won't wake up and I won't be back. I don't want to leave you. I am happy I decided to tell you my feelings before this. Because now I don't really know what lays ahead for me. Everything has become a blur. I guess the fault is really in our stars huh? 

I know that for you the road still continues.  It will continue even though at time you feel like you have lost it all. But not for me... I want you to promise me something. Promise me that if I don't make it, that you won't cry. Promise? I don't want you burdening over my death. Can you promise?  Promise me that even though you move on and find someone else that you will keep me in your heart? Yes? Don't forget about me. Please smile. Smile that it happened.  

I remember you telling me about your love for stars one day in biology.  Well guess what? I bought you a star. (The certificate is somewhere in the notebook be careful and look for it). Did you find it? I didn't know what to name it at first. But at the end I named it Sehun. I named it by name because I want you to know that no matter where you are or what time of day/night it is I will always be up there. I will never move. You can always look up at the sky and know that I will always be looking back at you.  I didn't name it after you because you are already a star to me. A star that shines brightly in my sky. 

If I don't make it I want you to know that I love you.  And I will continue to love you forever. I am not really good with romantic gestures of sayings but that is what I got to say. 

If I don't make it it just remember this; I am now dreaming of you.  I am staying up late to think of you forever. I no longer have to wish on a star for you to think of me. You don't have to either because I will be holding on tight to you for the rest of eternity.  I will continue dreaming about you and me in my room. I will be dreaming of you until tomorrow and for the rest of eternity. And it won't ever go away. 

Dream big ___________ and keep holding on. 

See you someday! 

Oh Sehun

You close the journal and place it on your lap. With the sleeves of your jacket you wipe away the endless tears that continue to roll down your delicate cheeks. No words can explain how you feel. Your emotions are all bundled up into one. You gaze up at the sky. You grab the journal and place it against your chest. You clutch tightly to it. 

"Sehun I promise. " You smile genuinely "I will continue holding on tightly to you.  I will dream of you until tomorrow.  And for the rest of my life." 

A stars shoots across the sky. It is your first time seeing a shooting star. You close your eyes.

I wish that wherever Sehun is he is thinking of you too. 

You heave sigh. And smile back to the dark night. "I love you too." 

Author's note: 

I am so sorry it is so long. I am also so sorry for my way of writing. I really . T.T

Anyways I hope you guys enjoy it! Please comment and tell me what you all think!  

The reason why I wrote this was because it is based on a dream I had. I just needed to write it out. Tell me what you guys think!  See ya! :)