The night Kim Jongin kissed me changed may life, but not in the way I'd expected. He had given me a ride home from my best friend Jung Soojung's house, where we'd all been drilling one another on vocabulary for the PSATs. There we were, sitting in his dad's Buick outside the Palms bungalow apartements, where my mom and I live, when out of nowhere Jongin slipped his arm around me.

I don't know what got into him, but one minute he'd been defining the word alacrity, and the next thing I knew he was demonstrating it. He moved across the seat so fast that I didn't have time to react. Suddenly, his lips was on mine. Instinctively, I closed my eyes and he kissed me.

"Su, I . . . I think I'm starting to like you," Jongin whispered.

My eyes flew open in suprise. But instead of seeing Jongin, I saw Lee Min Ho sunbae, who's on my swim team, the Dholpins, and my physics class, too. He's also the guy I've been daydreaming about for weeks. "I'm the one you really want," Min Ho sunbae-in-my-mind said. I gasped and jumped away from Jongin, leaving him to kiss air where my face had been.

"Jongin!" I shricked, staring at him.

"Su?" Jongin said, looking sheepish. "Are you mad? What's wrong?"

"N-n-nothing," I stuttered, trying to collect my thoughts. I couldn't belive that Kim Jongin, my buddy since kidergarten, had just kissed me!

I put my hand on his shoulder. "Look, Jongin," I said gently, "I'm very flattered. You're a great guy. But we're friends, and I'd like to keep it at that. I've so much going right now, I don't have time for romance."

But Jongin didn't look convinced. "Su," he said, twisting a lock of my straight black hair around his finger, "you know what they say about all work and no play . . ."

"Maybe," I said, stepping out of the car, "but all play and no work gets you career dipping cones at the Dairy Queen."

Actually, I didn't say that, I didn't even think up this perfect comeback until the next day. What came out instead were my mother's word, words often meant for me.

"Your passion is misguided," I informed him, closing the car door behind me.

"My what?" I saw Jongin's lips from the question behind the window glass right before I waved and turned away.

I couldn't belive i had said that. Mom uses passion in a way that doesn't have anything to do with kissing. it has to do with enthusiasm and ambition.

According to my mom, passion, like money, runs out. So you have to be careful not to spend it carelessly. My father, for example, turned out to be a bad investment. He wasn't around long enough to see me turn two. i don't really remember him, but Mom said once she'd loved him so much her heart hurt. After he took off, she poured what was left of her passion into me.

I feit kind of bad saying what I did to Jongin, but I guess the kiss really caught me off guard. I turned again go back and apologize, but he was already driving away.

I stood for a minute outside our apartement, looking up at the stars and thingking about the fact that one of my oldest and best friends just kissed me. When did Jongin's feelings for me change, and why hadn't i realized it? I had felt nothing when Jongin's lips were on mine. But for some unknown reason just the thought of Min Ho sunbae's lips sent my heart racing. It was true what I'd said to Jongin. I never had had time for guys. Until now.

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