F2 - A New Chapter

Word: 2,7K

Rating: Mild Angst, Work safe

Note: This chapter is the one about Taekwoon leaving VIXX. Don't get confused. I was going to write more for the J Story. But 2 people commented on the F one, so I got an urge to write more for the F one instead. Loe.

Slowly everyone get used to their separate career paths: VIXX idol life, and Taekwoon's now solo artist life. For VIXX members themselves, time moves faster for them. Singing part got rearranged, people's responsibilities got re-adjusted, but still everything and everyday have to moved according to schedule. Schedules are made weeks, months, and sometimes are planned a year ahead, if it has to do with their future songs and concepts, and touring. Life goes on, needless of what tears are shed, and or how much hurt and disappointment people carry inside their hearts.

Taekwoon drops the two plastic grocery bags down onto the hallway's floor. He punches in the password to VIXX's dorm. It stays the same as before he left the group. The machine beeps its usual approval sound, and a tiny green light flashes to signal the Okay. He grabs the metal handle, twists it and pushes the door smoothly open. He picks up his 2 bags ands strides into VIXX dorm, the place where he used to live.

He wonders if the other five are home yet. He had brought some convenience store packed meals for them. People can eat all the restaurant food, or home cooked food they want, but there's always more food that they can crave. He has grudgingly become their food shopper without never volunteering for the job. When they crave something, they just oh so casually drop the name of the food around him, in hoping he'll pick them up for them. As if he has all the free time in the world. Hongbin even has the audacity to complain on VIXX fancafe chat that he saw Taekwoon eating ramyun alone.

What's wrong with eating alone? He's living alone, and even if he's still living with them, why does he have to feed anyone? They are all adults. Taekwoon huffs whenever he remembers about these whiny kids, and their ways of blackmailing him to buy them food. Nevertheless in the end, here he is still bringing them food. He's loosing more and more of his fighting spirit as he gets older. It seems much easier mentally to just give in.

"Jaehwan-ah? Wonsik-ah?" 

Taekwoon calls out random names as he enters an empty living room. He looks around and listens to any sound that give hints to anyone's presence. He hears the sound of a door open, and subsequently spots a box of fried chicken on the table.

"Hakyeon-ie, I'm here." He calls out the greeting before needing to see the other man's face. Hakyeon, chicken and couch go hand in hand. It has become a running joke.

Just as he guessed correctly Hakyeon appears in the hallway. "Taekwoon." He smiles and comes out to the living room. "You bringing food?" He asks right away as he stares expectantly at the plastic bags. He comes sit down on the couch, and reclaiming his spot.

"Yes." Taekwoon puts the plastic bags down, and starts bringing out the different containers to see which one his friend will like to eat.

"Jaehawn is at his musical, and Wonsik is probably out with his friend somewhere, or is holing up in the recording room." Hakyeon explains as he reclines against the sofa's back. The two youngest are busy with filming these days so they are rarely home at this time. Hakyeon has set aside one container but makes no move to eat it just yet. He must have eaten some chicken already.

The more busy Hakyeon gets, the more he favours the couch. Solo activities can be time consuming, and sometimes he even misses out on a group activities. He's usually tired when he's back at the dorm. Even if he complains that others go out to eat or going to a movie without him, he usually prefers to rest or sleep than going somewhere in his remaining free time. When he's full of energy, others are lazy or are stuck with schedule and school.

Hence, Hakyeon develops the habit of taking naps on the couch, or lazing around on it. It's where he can watch s moving around when he's resting. If he's napping, chances are he'll wake up if people are coming or going. It's a small way of keeping track of everyone, even if he only see their faces. Hakyeon and couch are a running joke, but it has become such a fixture in their lives. When Hakyeon was away for Law of the Jungle, the living room felt empty without his constant presence, and complaining about how tired he was. 

Taekwoon leaves for the kitchen to store the remaining food containers. When he comes back, Hakyeon cheerfully pats the seat beside him. Taekwoon keeps his face blank, and ignores Hakyeon's beckoning. He opts to sit on a nearby wooden chair. Just as he predicts, Hakyeon stretches his lips out to give him a stank face.

Taekwoon presses his teeth together to hold off a smile from appearing. He should tell the other man to stop making those ugly faces, but he doubts Hakyeon will listen to him. In fact he'll do it more, and puts them near Taekwoon's face as retaliation. It will be completely opposite of what Taekwoon wants. Hakyeon now switches to giving him a pointed glare. They know each other too well. 

"Are you staying? Jaehwan will be here soon." Hakyeon gives the remote on the table a push to steer it to Taekwoon's direction. He lies down, and stretches out his long leg taking up most of the couch's space. He takes out his phone and starts fiddling with it. 

"Sure. I'm done for the day." Taekwoon answers. He had accomplished what he could today at the studio. He doesn't feel that he can be anymore productive than that. He'll continue practicing for Mata Hari at home. He's very fortunate to be landed a role in such a prestigious play. It's a huge opportunity and a real honour. He has an electronic keyboard at home too for composing and practicing. He has the space for it, seeing as he's living alone. Although the others keep dropping by whenever they please.

At first, it was Hakyeon who dropped by the most to stare at him. It was perhaps a form of punishment for him leaving VIXX half way before their contract was up. Next it was Jaehwan who dropped by the most to ask him for advice. With Hakyeon having to miss many meetings during his busiest periods, it was up to Jaehwan to look after the younger dongsaengs. If it was dancing related, they could have asked Wonsik in regard to that. Anything else, Jaehwan felt it was his obligation to talk to them about, even if it was only to lend them an ear which they can rant to. Jaehwan in turn came to Taekwoon, who's older than him just as he did in the past.

Eventually everyone just starts dropping by, and being nosy on what he's up to. Or they are dropping by at certain time maybe in hoping to catch him eating ramyun or pasta so they can steal some. They just help themselves to Taekwoon's place. Many times he comes home to find the food inside his fridge missing, or someone leaving a bag of chip or cookie bar on his table for him; It's as if it's a trade to make up for the missing food. If it's sweet, there's a high chance it's Jaehwan who leaves it for him. 

He flips slowly through the different channels, not having any real interest on anything at the moment. Hakyeon continues fiddling with his phone. The clicking and clacking of keys, digital or otherwise, and the low murmur of sound coming from the TV fill in the comfortable atmosphere. Shortly later Hakyeon puts down his phone, and his eyelids slowly flutter down. His eyelashes fan down as he's falling asleep. Taekwoon pays heed to press the volume down to the last bar.

He can leave right now. He has no need to wait for Jaehwan or anyone else to come home. They'll eat the food regardless whether they see his face or not. There's also Hakyeon here who will tell them anyway. However he doesn't mind sitting still just a little bit more. It's comfortable and comforting; This peaceful silence, with a sleeping Hakyeon near him. It's good to see his formal leader resting. He has his couch, and plenty of food around him. A new day is still hours away.

Taekwoon's phone beeps and he gets startled. He takes his eyes off his sleeping friend's face, and takes his phone quickly out. He gets up and moves inside the kitchen, lest the phone's noises wake Hakyeon up needlessly. His lips stretch into a huge grin when he sees it's a new picture of Minyool, his baby nephew. His sister has been consistently sending him new pictures of Minyool. Even if he wants to visit his newphew everyday, it's not feasible since he doesn't live near his sister. These pictures keep him updated, and they never fail to bring a smile to his face, and brighten up his day.

"Taekwoon?" Hakyeon suddenly calls out his name. His voice is loud and a little panicking.

Taekwoon stops in his track of sending back a reply, and quickly walk back into the livingroom. "I'm here."

He answers back in a hurry as he reaches Hakyeon, who's sitting up on the couch and looking around widely. Hakyeon settles his eyes on him. He stares wide-eyed at him for a brief suspenseful moment, before his eyes soften. He looses his look of shock or surprise.

"What is it?" Taekwoon doesn't spot anything, or anyone in the room that should have alarmed his friend. He sits down on the couch and studies Hakyeon's face. 

Hakyeon closes his eyes for a few seconds almost tiredly. When he opens his eyes, the tiredness is gone or he has hidden them away. "Nothing." He smiles but it doesn't look honest. Hakyeon is the worst liar out of the six of them. "I was just surprised when I woke up and you were gone. Maybe I was dreaming."

"I see." He's skeptical that Hakyeon is telling the truth, but not everything needs or even can be explained to the minute detail.

"It's ah - ah." Hakyeon minces his words up as if he can read Taekwoon's mind. "I dreamt about you leaving before." Taekwoon's eyes turn thoughtful, and Hakyeon shrugs his shoulder as if to say it's nothing or not a big deal.

"Okay." Taekwoon responds.

"Really! Or maybe I was dreaming that you were still in the group." Hakyeon blabbers. "A dream like that would definitely give me surprise. Cause you know when I woke up, I would remember that you actually left." Hakyeon's smile slips a fraction, and his lips press together tight for a few seconds before smoothing them out again.

Hakyeon has always been a poor liar. Whenever he tries to tell a prank or hide his weariness, his real feeling always sip through the small cracks. Taekwoon's sharp stinging pain, which had gone away last month, is now returning back full force inside his chest. It hurts. He has had similar dreams. He would have dreams where he was still promoting with VIXX. They were normal everyday dreams full of ups and downs, but also full of laughter. He would wake up alone in his room, temporarily feeling hollow. However, ultimately he would be glad that he was in the present, and not the past. The reality carries more hurt than he had wished for. However, he had asked for it, and he will live in it with open eyes.

Taekwoon bites down his lower lips and he casts his eyes down. Like a coward, he's shying away from Hakyeon's own attempt at shielding his hurt. His mind is bleak, and he can't even utter the bare minimum of acknowledgment to his friend's excuse. Long seconds pass by while Taekwoon's mind is scrambling, and forcing him to say something, anything. It's the least he can do to not make things awkward again.

"I have had those dreams too." His low voice sounds louder in the quiet apartment.  

"Ah?"

"Yes, I would dream of doing group work with everyone as if I had never left. " Taekwoon reveals to his friends to stop the silence. Another part of him feels lighten as he lets out some of the thoughts, that has been swirling inside of him. "They all - seem so normal. Those dreams."

"Yeah they do." His friend voices his agreement. Another brief moment passes, then he talks again. "We can do without those kinds of dreams." He says sadly but gently.

"Yes." It's Taekwoon's turn to agree.

Whether those dreams are happy or sad, when they wake up, those dreams will inevitably make them having thoughts which they don't need to have. It's not good sometimes when he thinks too much, as he is often prone to do. He doesn't need dreams to give him more reason for pondering and driving him up the wall. Taekwoon lifts his head enough to put a loose arm around Hakyeon's back. Hakyeon's own two arms come around him and return the hug tighter. Taekwoon feels encouraged by Hakyeon's easy and immediate gesture, and his other arm comes up and around Hakyeon too.

He closes his eyes, and rests his face on Hakyeon's shoulder. The ache in his chest slowly subsides. Today once again, he's taking refugee in his friend's warmth and compassion. They sit quietly and taking comfort from the closeness, and this moment of understanding between them. After awhile, Taekwoon shifts to move away. He drops his arms but Hakyeon still has his arms snugly around him. He shifts his body again and attempts to back away. The hug is nice and all, but it's getting too long. This much affection should be enough for a week, or a month right? 

"Hakyeon-ie~" He urges his friend.

Hakyeon being Hakyeon, he only tightens his hold even more in response. He always does too much, even moreso if he felt his friend is slipping away from him. He admited this tendency on tv during the recording of The 4 Things show back in 2014. This is why Taekwoon is allergic to hugging or showing affection to his same age friend, or even teasing that require him to touching his friend. The overly affectionate man always return the attention ten fold. It's too much. Isn't a little bit of skinship at a time sufficient and a better amount?

"Let go." He thumps Hakyeon's back lightly.

"No!" His friend replies promptly and then laughs, as if he's pleased with his action, and Taekwoon's reaction.

"Arggg," Taekwoon groans loudly. He debates in his head whether he needs to do some drastic action to get away from this octopus.

His brain pauses as his ears pick up some faint sound. He and Hakyeon stay still as their ears recognize the smooth whoosh sound of the door being opened and then closed. Another person is coming home. Taekwoon desperately tugs on Hakyeon's arms again, and he tries to leans away even more. His persistent friend doesn't give up, and keeps holding onto tightly to his body. Taekwoon leans some more and he ends up leaning too far back; His loses balance. He ends up falling backward onto the floor with Hakyeon's heavy body dropping along with him, and on top of him. The impact takes some of his breath away.

He groans and in needed air. Hakyeon groans even more louder, since it was his own arms which cushioned most of the impact. His arms are still around Taekwoon's back, and his body is spread out on top of Taekwoon. Luckily the impact is minimum since Taekwoon's back wasn't that far away from the floor before he lost his balance.

It was Jaehwan who comes up next to them, and stands there looking down curiously. He makes no move to help them up, or helps Taekwoon getting out of Hakyeon's clutch. Doesn't he remember these prolong tight hugs are not Taekwoon's kind of thing? Taekwoon is already frowning before the younger even makes a comment. He can just guess already what Jaehwan will say with that smirk on his lips, and his too shining round eyes. 

Just as Taekwoon dreads, his dongsaeng doesn't miss the chance to spout some nonsense. "Ah what a lovely atmosphere. After all these years, my two hyungs' loving hearts still haven't changed." His dongsaeng proceeds to giggle as if he's telling the funniest joke in the world. He then ignores the daggers shooting out of Taekwoon's eye. He skips lightly away to the kitchen, while Taekwoon struggles to escape Hakyeon's renew death grip around him.

"No you can't kill him." Hakyeon screeches. "VIXX can't survive with only 4 members left."

Taekwoon releases a long weary sigh, as Hakyeon starts poking him preemptively as punishment. He hasn't even done anything yet!