“Your name..?”

“My name..?”

My name could be the sweetest thing to hear from your pink little lips. Just by the way you purse them together; I can already get all nervous. And those lips that are just about rightly placed on your flawless face, those lips that go together perfectly with your chubby cheeks and your eyes.. Those eyes that I fear may see through my forever: my past, my present and my soon-to-be. My soon-to-be that I very much wish is with you. Do you see that soon-to-be with you in it..?

Every morning, I would come here, sit at the same spot. Sometimes I would bring a book or two, or my iPod that randomly played those sappy love songs (I don’t even know how those got there) that I never thought in my life I would listen to. Occasionally, I would bring the hyungs. They would tease me a lot every time I brought them. It’s a good thing you never notice this. I glance nervously at you just to check if you’ve noticed, though. And thankfully you haven’t.

I would always order the same thing, good thing I haven’t ordered yet with you behind the counter. I wonder what would happen if that occurred. Will you recognize me? Will you say yes if I asked you out? Will you take my hand and together we’ll go out into the busy streets of Seoul and eat ddukbokki ? Will you accompany me to Insadong and buy calligraphy brushes or go to Myeongdong if shopping’s your thing? But I look at you and my thoughts get jumbled up. You’re so.. simple. Just the right amount of simple for me. Not too trying-hard, and not plain-looking. In my eyes, you stood out so much; so much so that you were the first thing I noticed the moment I passed by this place. You don’t even wear makeup when all the other female workers here wear theirs as thick as Hyukjae-hyung’s eyeliner.

But then again, what if you recognize me and end up being like the other girls? What if you didn’t like ddukbokki, or calligraphy, or shopping? What if you didn’t like me? What if…?

I’ll never know, I guess. I shrug the idea off as I go back to staring at you. But you aren’t around. I was pretty sure I figured out your schedule by now.. Where were you? My drama starts shooting tomorrow, I wouldn’t get to see you in a while.. Where are you right now when I need to see you the most? I don’t want to leave with a heavy heart.

I decide it’s time for me to go order. So while looking down, I make my way to the counter. I decide I should probably get cake because I feel so low.

“Which cake would you like?”

My head snapped up at the sound of that soothingly familiar voice.

“I recommend the Orange cake; it’s one of my favorites.”

You smiled while tilting your head to the side. My head started spinning and my heart was beating hard against my ribs; it even took me a while to comprehend what you just said. Did you just say Orange cake? And you say it’s one of your favorites? I think I just died; how can you be so painfully adorable? And how can it be possible that we prefer the same thing? Is this.. fate? Now I just sound like, Kyuhyun-ah.
“…”

You stare at me while I drown in the deepness of your eyes. Then I got back from my daydream.
“Yes, a slice of that please.”
I managed to squeak out an answer.
You made a little happy clap. You adorable thing. I think my heart just did a double flip.

“And a cup of cappuccino please.”

 It was such a wonderful spring Sunday morning and everything is just going nicely, I can’t even believe I’m actually talking to you.

“That’s all..?”

“Yes, thank you.”

I fish out my wallet and lay out the bills for my payment. And then, your voice came again.

“Your name..?”

Oh how sweet your voice was. Even lovelier than oranges, Sundays and springs put together. But how do I answer you..? You look at me like you’ve seen my whole being, but here you are, asking for my name.

And I will answer you with all my heart, like my whole being as well depended on that single answer, that answer that I hope will make all the difference in the world not only for you, but also for me. That my answer will be a step closer to that ddukbokki, or tea cups and calligraphy, or those bags of clothing.

“My name..?”

My name is forever insignificant but with you uttering it is just like I’ve become the most significant thing in the universe.

I scratch my head a little; how can I be so shy at a time like this? I stutter at my answer as I look straight at your becoming eyes, as if assuring me that it was safe to trust you my world because you are already part of it.

“My name is.. Kibum.”