Loud voices of two man yelling at each other echo through the hallway. The neighbor doesn't want to interfere with their fight but it certainly is getting on their nerves.

"You should just quit that ing job!" The chinese boy said as he hold the tears in his eyes from falling down. His boyfriend of 3 years have been very distant lately with the excuse of work taking all of his time. Tao can't help but to doubt those words. He's probably tired of me and had someone else in his mind

"That ing job is the one that is feeding you right now! All that you've done is mopping around the house complaining about stuff you didn't have!" Chanyeol counter-attack Tao's words. He felt guilty uttering those words but right now his anger is taking over his common sense.

"The only thing I didn't have is your attention. Ever since you got the new position, you don't have a single second for me!"

"You need to understand! I-"

"You what!" Tao cuts off his boyfriend. "You don't need me anymore or something."

"If you keep not letting me talk, yes. I won't need you anymore." The brunette said with clenched fist, trying to hold his anger so he won't say anymore words that he will regret in the future. But right now, Tao is really ticking him off.

"Go on then! Go with your work! to that printer!"

"You're ing stupid. No one can with their work. Fix your brain up!"

"Well maybe! Maybe....." Tao paused, thinking twice whether to spill the things that he had in mind for a time now.

"Maybe what?! Finally come to terms of how ridiculous you are?" Chanyeol immediately spat at Tao.

"Maybe you could one of your coworker or something! Wait, maybe you already have!" The shorter male finally said.

"Wait, what?! What the are you talking about?" Chanyeol was antonished that now his coworker are involved in the fight.

"That's right. Maybe that's why you're at your office all the time! You're ing with them isn't it!"

Chanyeol was truly mad now. Tao has never involved other people into their fights especially since he thought that Tao knew that he'll never cheat on him. "Maybe I am!"

Tao paused at the reply. For weeks and end he had his doubt but he never actually consider it to be true. But now that Chanyeol himself have confirmed it, he feels so broken that the tears that he have held for long start to rain down.

"I would prefer to with them than with you anyway! Atleast they help me out with my works compared to you. They are better in bed than you anyway. You're just some lousy excuse for a hole that I can stuff my with." Chanyeol paused to take a breath but when he realized that Tao haven't said anything, he finally take a look at Tao's face that are now filled with hatred, anger and sadness.

Chanyeol knew he crossed the line. Those feelings on Tao's face isn't for him, it's for Tao himself. He knew that Tao has always been insecure with himself especially since his previous boyfriend left him because he found another man. Immediately Chanyeol regret all the words that he have said.

"Tao... I... I didn't mean that." He tried to make it up but Tao is too deep to be convinced.

"I knew it.... I knew it, channie... I knew it three years ago and I knew it now..." Tears now falls freely like they're measuring his pain. "Tao, I never-" Chanyeol tried to reason.

"How could someone worthless like me be enough for you... For anyone..."  He falls on his arse and buried his face into his legs. The sounds of his cries were loud even though they were muffled. Chanyeol immediately goes next to Tao and tried to consort him.

"I'm so sorry darling." He kissed Tao's hair. "I didn't mean a word that I said, please forgive me." But Tao is not convinced even by a little.

Tao lift up his face to look at Chanyeol revealing his swollen eyes. "Can I get some water please?" He said softly. Chanyeol almost jump to his feet. "Sure! I'll be back."

The taller quickly went to the kitchen to get some water for his partner. What have I said? No matter how mad I am, how could I have said that. Pouring the water into Tao's favorite cup, he thought of every ways of apology that he could do. However, when he returned to the living room, Tao was nowhere to be seen.

--

Once those words flies out from Chanyeol's mouth, Tao doesn't miss putting the blame on himself. Chanyeol is right, he had done nothing to make his boyfriend's life any easier. How did Chanyeol tolerate him before? Even himself wonder, Chanyeol must be a saint.

Asking for water was an excuse so Chanyeol can leave him alone. He need to get out from here, no, he need to get out from Chanyeol's life.

After making sure that Chanyeol won't be hearing him leave the house, he grab his jacket and motorcycle's key and run out the door.

To be honest, the young man have nowhere to go. Though he have been living in Korea for awhile, he never had a chance to make any good friends. The first person that goes through his mind is Yura, Chanyeol's sister. He know that Yura have always favor him over Chanyeol in term of relationship problem and she will cover for him.

"Right. Yura's." Tao said, setting on his destination, he took off ignoring the unpleasant feeling in his guts.

Thinking of the argument that he had with Chanyeol cause his eyes to become teary again. Is this the end of them? He really love Chanyeol, but I guess he deserve better.

His thought was cut off by the blinding light infront of him. Not realizing what's happening, searing pain devour his whole body and there's a loud ringing in his ears. He can hardly breathe when he saw what seems to be a car's tyre speeding away.

Suddenly, flashback of his life start to play infront of his eyes. Introducing himself to Chanyeol, their first date at the theme park, Chanyeol asking him to be his boyfriend in the middle of the heavy rain, Chanyeol making love to him, Chanyeol introducing him to his family, Chanyeol, Chanyeol, Chanyeol. And in that moments, he regret that their last moment would be fighting and arguing with each other.

"Cha.. chanyeol.... I.. I.. lov.. love you..." Tao said before finally giving in to the pain.

--

He just can't stop crying. He's crying so hard that he's having trouble breathing and snort are coming out from his nose but he doesn't care how he look right now. He'll be the ugliest man on earth if that could save his boyfriend's life.

"Chanyeol.... You should stop this... Tao would be sad to see you like this." Yura said. She, Baekhyun and Kyungsoo both have been waiting infront of the surgery room for a few hours now. Baekhyun and Kyungsoo was pretty mad to be interupted from their love making but immediately rushed to the hospital after hearing the news about Tao.

"I agree," Kyungsoo said. "You shouldn't be sad, Tao would be sad too then." The petite man tried to comfort his friend.

"It's all my fault! I shouldn't have just take some shift off for him... Why didn't I... Why..." Chanyeol continued to blame himself for the accident.

"Don't blame yourself, Chanyeol. How could anyone know that this will happen." Baekhyun have been friend with Chanyeol since elementary school and by far, he has never seen Chanyeol this broken.

Chanyeol is about to reply when the light turn green indicating that the surgery is finished. Not long after, a man came out from the room. They immediately rush to the doctor asking all sort of question rushly especially Chanyeol who looked like he about to get a heart attack.

"Sir, please calm down and hear me out. You might get the answer to some of the question if you listen." The man tried to reason with Chanyeol. Hearing him, Chanyeol calm down a bit and actually gave the doctor a chance to speak. Yura pats her brother's back trying to help him.

"He got 2 broken ribs and one of them puncture his liver. His head experience excessive bleeding that cause brain damage." Right there, Chanyeol feels like the world is crumbling on him.

"However," Chanyeol immediately put all his attention to the doctor. "We managed to patched up his liver and stop the bleeding in his head. While the broken ribs will take a while to heal, since it's still in position, it will be okay."

Chanyeol take a breathe of relief when he heard the words flew out of the doctor mouth.

"Now Mr.." The doctor look out the young man. "Chanyeol. This is Yura, Baekhyun and Kyungsoo."

"Mr. Chanyeol. You might want to sit down." He points toward the chair and Chanyeol quickly obeyed him.

After making sure that Chanyeol is steady enough to listen to the news, he continued. "Mr. Huang is in coma right now. We don't know when will he wake up but if he doesn't wake up within this month.... The chances of him waking up will go down by 5 percent."

Chanyeol's heart stop. "And if that happen, after 2 month you will have to decide whether we should.... let him rest forever." Without him knowing, tears start falling down.

Speechless, Chanyeol feel everything leaving his mind. "C-can I meet him?" He said, head down to the floor as if a heavy weight is on top of him.

"We'll be transfering him in a minute. You can visit him then, I believe you book him the whole room so you will not have time limit to visit."

"Thank you, doctor." Yura said, replacing the speechless Chanyeol.

The man nod and leave the room giving them some space.

Yura told Baekhyun and Kyungsoo to go home and rest first since they were here from the night while Yura herself is going back home to shower and bring some clothes for Chanyeol. In the end, Chanyeol was left all alone with Tao.

Sitting beside the bed. He looks at the scratches and wounds all over his boyfriend's face and body. It was a hit and run, we're still tracing the car but since the area is quite remote, there are no CCTV evidence. He clenched his fist from anger, nails leaving crescent marks in his palm.

If he could catch the person who did this to Tao, the person won't be able to pray before he take revenge on him. Which human would do this to another person.

He thought of all the moments they had together, how happy they were before. It started going downhill when he got promoted for his work, he had to work outstation often and came home at midnight most of the time. By then, he was to tired to even show his affection to his beloved one.

Quietly, he kissed every wounds he see on Tao's face, except for his lips which was covered by an oxygen mask. The last kiss landed on his eyes and the feeling linger around Chanyeol's lip. He would do anything to see that eyes open again.

For a few weeks he never left the hospital unless it's necessary. Baekhyun and Kyungsoo will bring homemade food for him once in awhile and Yura will bring him clothes every week. He ended up getting fired from his job but in a way, he's happy. That job created nothing but bitter memories for him. In fact, he believed that he should have quit earlier.

Tao's adopted family visited him but quickly leave again because of work and school. After they left, Chanyeol can't help but feel bad for Tao. All his life, he was either abandoned or was left alone by everyone he love. His family, his friends and even his previous boyfriend. How could such wonderful person received such a horrible misfortune.

On the day that mark 2 months of Tao being in coma, Chanyeol went to pray and bow for Tao's health. He bow and bow until his forehead is red and his waist hurting. When he returned to the hospital, his family and some of his friends are there.

The doctor immediately instructed everyone to goes to the waiting room to avoid crowding the patient. In the end, only Chanyeol, his parent and Tao's adopt mom is there.

"Hello everybody," The doctor spoke up first. "Today you will be making some important decision."

No one dare to speak up.

"You will have to decide whether Mr. Huang will continue being supported or not. Personally, I would recommend letting him rest as it will end his pain that he have been suffering for long."

"I... I agree." Chanyeol's dad spoke up first. He was never fond of his son being in a relationship with a man, but he know that Tao is a good person and he shouldn't suffer anymore.

"When I first saw him in the orphanage, no one is playing with him." Tao's mom suddenly said. "He was all alone playing with the toys. The guardian said that his parents dumped him when he was 6 infront of the house while it was pouring heavily." She wiped her tears.

"He have a fear of rain." Chanyeol said softly. "I asked him to be my boyfriend then, he was afraid as hell but he still smile and accepted me."

"Yes. He have a lot of fear, one of them is the fear of being alone." Tao's mom took a hold of Chanyeol's hand. Mrs Park rubbed her son's back. "He never said it directly but you can see it in his eyes, when I send him to school, when I put him to sleep, his eyes is begging me to stay and accompany him."

"But he'll never say it out loud." Chanyeol said and the old woman nod. "He'll keep it to himself, thinking that he will be an annoyance to everyone but he never is. Instead, he bring happiness into my life, because of him, it has been nothing but a bliss for me." Chanyeol wiped his tears and kissed both Tao's and his mom's cheek.

Slowly walking to the still body and never taking his eyes off him. He peck at every part of Tao's face, starting with his forehead, his eyes, his nose, his cheek and lastly, taking off the oxygen mask and leaving one last kiss on his lip.

"We should end his pain." Each words feel like a stone being throw at him.

No one spoke and just nodding as an agreement sign.

Seeing the decision, the doctor put a hand onto Chanyeol's shoulder and Chanyeol slowly pace away from his boyfriend.

Giving one last glance to all the people in the room, the doctor start to turn off the support machine. Starting with the oxygen machine,the green light turn red and the sound of the machine stop functioning echoes through the room. He then remove the IV drip machine from Tao's blood vessel.

He hesitant to turn off the heart pump machine. This machine will officially end this young man's life. There's 4 button for him to push and when he pressed the first and second one, he can't help but feel nervous. He slowly press the third one and Chanyeol looked like he's the one dying.

I guess this is it. I love you. I'm sorry.

Hello!

This is totally a bunch of words vomit. I wasn't planning for this to be this long, tbh. But I keep accidentally making it longer and now I'm suffering from it HAHAHAHA. Anyway, I had to split this in two because it's became too long. Maybe I'll post the next one in 2 days? Hopefully I'll finish writing by then! Sorry for the bad writing and I hope it's tolerable at least for you to read until part 2.

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