You grogerly moaned to yourself

Who in there right mind would go to sleep with the blinds open in a building facing the morning sun, their just asking to be woken up at crazy times in the morning. Refusing to open your eyes you snuggle deeper into the muscular chest you woke up clinging to every morning, as the familer smell of man before a shower hit your nostrils you stretched, only then realizing just how entwined you'd become over night

Not only was he completely laying on your left arm, making it uncomfortably numb, his muscular leg was also partly draped over your own. His skin warming your tights to a searing tempture.

You suddenly realized why the sun was annoying you more then usual and the pounding in your head told you before you'd remembered anything of the night before,  Namjoons Birthday party had racked in over 30 friends all supporting expensive wines and sprits.

The shining bottles had all but disappeared by the time most of the guests had gone, and trust me when I say his friends expired no expense on the liquors that ended up being lined in rows on the expanse of kitchen work tops. 

And good god you where regretting being part of it.

Deciding it was safe it peak your eyes open you fluttered a heavy eyelid. Instantly deciding it was the stupidest idea you'd ever had in your entire life, and to your surprise the streak of light beaming into the room wasn't even resting on your face.

A loud wining sound escaped your lips even before you realized it was yours

the body you where rest on growned and wiggled into the duvey a little, the slight snoring growing louder as he settled back to sleep causing you to gently poke his side.

The steadily growing pain in your arm had gotten unbearable and the only way you where gunna escape to make breakfast for the three of them was to wake him up and subject him to the same pain of the hangover you where sure they'd both have too.

Smiling a little "I new saving this would come in handy" you thought to yourself, seeking to lesson the blow of waking up to the brightest world one had ever woken up too you slowly slid the hand that was resting on his chest down, across the soft skin off his abdomen and down further resting your fingers just above the waist band of his boxers, or not. Frowning in surprise you slid your hands down slightly further until being interrupted by a voice.

One that defiantly wasn't your good natured Boyfriend's, But one much deeper.

Your heart dropped to the floor as a face instantly popped into your consciousness, one that you'd seen many, many times before. Your eyes flung open in horror as the boyish face in your mind disappears, replaced by chin of the real person, his perfect cheeks lifting, two cute dimples pinching into his perfect skin

"ahhh..now that's a nice way to wake up" Namjoon mumbled, pulling you closer to him a bright smile stretching on his face as he embraced you. 

"..wait!" every muscle in your body tences as he pulls you closer to his form, thought it didn't make much of a difference, you woke up pretty much laying flat on top of him.

"no,no,no no no" you gasped in horror as you watch the dimples quickly disappear, his whole face furrowing in confusion as he too recognizes the voice of the person laying next to him, Namjoons eyes flick open as his jaw drops in complete and utter shock

Meting his eyes for the briefest of seconds was to much to bare as your head instantly drops, your hand snapping away from him as you realize just how close you'd come to blowing the only good thing you had in your life. Tears pour down your cheeks as your forehand rests on his chest once more, the pain of his weight holding you too him, forgotten. 

But what if..what if waking up next to him wasn't the problem, you watched as your tears patted onto his side, stinging your eyes, your head hanging low in silence there was no hope of getting up or even shuffling away from him, the blankness you'd felt when you woke up still blocked the blurry memorys of last night. That's when he asked the very same question you where so desperately grasping for "did we..??"

Only then did he realize how stuck you both where and practaly jumped into a sitting position, the thin fabric covering his dignity sliding off his toned thighs and heaping next to him in a silky pile,

"shi!" he hissed as he quickly raised a hand to grab hold of the cloth.

The next second a searing pain spread the whole left side of my face, making me cry out in pain, the sound mixing with the wet slap of his knuckles as they connect with my tear stained cheek bone.

"Oh my god, I'm So Sorry!" he screamed in my ears as he reached out to cradle my head, at that moment I wanted nothing more then to crawl into a ball and die, the only thing i was glad for was the fact he couldn't see my face my hair was clinging weakly to my moist and newly swollen cheeks. even if i could sneak back into our shared room Hoseok would see the red marks when he woke and twig something wasn't quite right, there was no hiding from it now.

I'd lose him, I'd lose both of them.

"are you ok?..I..I didn't mean it, it was an accident, Pl..Please talk to me" Namjoon stiffly uttered.

My whole body shook as i whispered "theres no going back from this"

I pushed myself away from his as forcefully as i could, thank full i was wearing an oversized t-shirt, even if it was his.

"hey hey hey" he said, pulling me back towards him sympathetically, i didn't resist.

My world had turned into a pain full blurr.and i new i proberly wouldn't be getting another hug until i dragged my whole life back to my parents house next week.

"you don't remember anything?" -he bend his head to speak to the Curtin of hair that was me " Not a thing.." i replied, the loud sobs that shook my entire body subsiding into a silent flow of liquid snot and tears. He took a deep breath and bit his lip, his arms tightening around me as he confessed "i remember a tiny bit..not everything but.." raising my head slowly I let him brush the hair away from my cheeks, almost surprised he wasn't horrified at my blotchy sodden mess of a face.

"like..??" i peer up at him.

"Well.." he looks away from me, sighing deeply as he continues "you stayed up to help clean up a bit before going to bed, by that time Hoseok was snoring in his room and I only had one friend over...he left pretty quickly after that and..we where alone and you..tripped on that bit of carpet you always trip over" he stopped and attempted to stiffel and sniff "i caught you..and..we where both ridiculously drunk"

"so we did?" the burning in your face was nothing to the pain surfacing in your heart at his words. "Wait, don't tell me any more, I can't take it"

"I have to go..he'll be up soon" fresh tears pooled in my eyes and spilled down my cheeks, when he raised a loving hand to gently wipe them from my cheeks I unconsciously flinched.

"I'm so sorry" pushing him away for the second time i quickly hopped off the bed.

"Wait!" he grabbed my wrist, "Don't go yet!" 

"I have too!" I sobbed 

"I'll tell him its my fault!"

shaking my wrist from his grip I quickly cross the large room flinging the door open, using all my will power to close it quietly behind me.

Looking back at his face wasn't an option right now..