Donghae is used to waiting. He has done that for a while, sitting on the same place while he stares at the sky, marvelling on how beautiful the sky is at dawn or at the night where there are so many stars appearing.

He isn’t alone or lonely. He makes friends with his neighbours, ranging from old people to young ones and they all adore him. He plays with the kids, becomes a listener from teenagers who confide to him and even joins the elders in their talks sometimes.

Sometimes though, their times are up and they are gone just like that, and Donghae really is happy for them, but he feels lonely too.

--

Donghae often receives visitors, fans who leave him flowers, relatives who leave him his favourite food, or just the Super Junior members coming to talk in front of him in gibberish yet he still treasures that times even if sometimes it doesn’t make any sense.

Yet, he isn’t coming.

--

Donghae’s life, from when he entered SM dancing studio and encountered the overly-confident boy standing in the centre of the room, has been filled with that boy.

That boy, who later he learned the name of, Lee Hyukjae, is a sun to Donghae. Even if at early age where they did not understand love and harboured crushes on other people, they always have this special bond that other people cannot invade in.

Donghae sometimes ponders briefly, what makes Hyukjae is so special, so different from the other people?

And the answer comes as quick as the thought itself.

It is his smile, isn’t it? Then comes his kindness, then comes his sense of humours, and then Donghae loses count and Hyukjae’s everything becomes the reason. That’s why Donghae dubs him as the sun, because he shines so brightly and fills his life with vibrant colours.

Donghae always thinks that he always falls behind Hyukjae, that Hyukjae is so amazing and he is not, that Hyukjae will not look at him beyond friendship.

Who knows the day when Hyukjae kisses him after Super Junior’s 1st concert at the backstage comes, and Donghae then knows that Hyukjae sees him in equal terms as the boy in front of him turns into a blushing mess and blabbering that he likes him since forever and he hopes Donghae will date him.

(Donghae shuts him up with a kiss.)

--

Hyukjae finally comes. With a girl. Donghae sees them holding hands, the expression of affection that Hyukjae has directed to him in the past is now directed to the girl.

Donghae should have seen this coming because a person as wonderful as Hyukjae should not be bounded by a promise from someone who does not exist anymore and he does tell Hyukjae that he has to move on.

That doesn’t make it less hurt.

Hyukjae introduces the girl as his girlfriend, who is then bowing towards him in 90 degrees, a sign of respect that baffles him, because Hyukjae couldn’t have told her their history together, hasn’t he?

 “It’s been what, 5 years?” Hyukjae starts when he sees his girlfriend has left them.

Five years, Donghae thinks forlornly, five years of waiting here alone.

Hyukjae clenches his fist and kneels down, his hand stretches out and caressing the grey stone like he is caressing Donghae, and Donghae almost c