~Jonghun POV~

when I opened my eyes, the sun was already up. I looked at Hongki who was still sleeping beside me. I smiled as I saw him cuddle my arm in his sleep. today was the end of our short vacation, sad as it was, we need to go back and work. I gently tapped him on the shoulder and said "hey, wake up now Hongkiah, today is our return to seoul, the plane will leave in a couple of hours and we still need to pack." then I got up from the bed but hongki held my arm.

"Don't leave me okay?" he said, somewhat still dreamy.

"of course I won't,.. you won't leave me also okay?" I replied, smiling at him who is somewhat awake now.

"Sure!!" he said as he jumped off the bed. funny and playful, he can be really. I smiled as I saw him rush out of the room to the kitchen.

after some time, we finished packing and went straight to the airport. we arrived just a bit earlier so, we still had time to have coffee in a cafe inside the airport. after that, we boarded the plane to seoul.

~Hongki POV~

the flight was long and tiring, but with Jonghun beside me, it was worth it. the vacation was one of the greatest that I had. when we reached home, Jonghun immediately went to his room to unpack and I went also to my own room and laid on the bed thinking of unpacking later. after a few moments, Jonghun came to my room and laid on my bed also.

"Yahh, what are you doing here?" I asked as I was looking at him.

"I want to stay here with you. I don't want to be left alone. so, don't leave me, arasso?" he said as he relaxed himself on my bed.

"yeah, I understand... I won't leave you." I said as I embraced him.

we then slowly dozed off. I feel a slow fading pain in my head, but dismissed it as my thoughts were filled with Jonghun...

~Jonghun POV~

the next few days, we were able to finish the album and all of us were happy upon its completion. I saw Hongki put all his efforts on the album and I was happy about it. we were clebrating with the staff and with my friend Seunghyun who came over and had a role on the album somewhat. as we were drinking soju while cooking the beef barbeque, I looked at hongki and noticed that he was rubbing his head. I wondered why, as I was about to ask him, he said "jonghun, mianhae, but I need to go somewhere okay?.. see you later.." and after he said that, he excused himself from the group and left. I thought of following him but I realized that if he wanted me to be with him wherever he wanted to go to, he would have asked me to go with him, so I left him alone and celebrated with the group.

~Hongki POV~

when I felt another sudden pain inside my head, I tried not to show it with the rest of the people in there. I saw jonghun looking at me so I bid goodbye to him and the rest and left immediately. I do not want him to be with me when I'll go to the hospital to ask the doctor once again about my recurring headaches. I don't want him to be with me when the doctor tells me what my condition is. so, after leaving the celebration of the album, I went straight to the hospital and waited for the doctor. when they asked me to go inside, they did some tests on me and after waiting for a while, the doctor asked me to go inside once again.

"I have a bad news for you hongki." the doctor said with a grave look on his eyes.

I felt nervous, what could it be? I stammered as I asked the doctor of what my condition is. he looked at me in the eyes and said

"the source of your recurring headaches is a small tumor in your hypothalamus. though small as it is, it is an acute tumor and operation is fatal. but if we don't operate, it will spread and it can also be the cause of your death. either way, I'm sorry to say it, but it will be the cause of your passing. I'm very sorry, but with the current medical techology, operation on this part and treatment is still considered impossible."

my world ended that night when the doctor told me about my condition. I wasn't able to move because of shock. I didn't even realize that there were tears that were falling in my eyes at that moment. suddenly, my world became so dark. I went home that night, not knowing what to do. should I tell Jonghun about this or not. I don't want him to see me struck with this illness and crippled at its effects in the future. I can't bear such pain and pity in his eyes. I wouldn't be able to have that. then I thought about leaving.. would it be the best solution? I kept thinking about it as I rode home. 

As I reached home, I went straight to my room and stared blankly in the darkness while sitting in my bed. I thought about what the doctor said again. then, tears came out of my eyes again. the pain that is swelling in my heart. my dreams, crushed once and for all. all this grief, brought by this disease that I have. and I can't even do anything to cure it. it hurts, really hurts, and there's nothing I can do but to suffer and suffer alone.

~Jonghun POV~

when I reached home, the lights were all closed. I wondered if he was home already. I went to his room, and there I saw him lying on his bed, perhaps he's already asleep. I laid next to him and I felt a sudden coldness, as if sadness were enveloping this room. it was strange. he faced me, I saw his eyes and they were swelling, as if he cried for too long. I asked him what's wrong, but he only replied nothing.

"no matter what happens, always remember that I love you Jonghun" he said, then he turned his back on me and slept.

that was wierd. something really happened to him. but I would let it go tonight. I'll just talk to him tomorrow morning I though as sleep slowly crept up with me. when I wake up the following morning, hongki wasn't beside me anymore. "he woke up earlier than me? that doesn't happen usually", I thought as I got up from the bed and went to the kitchen while looking for him. he wasn't anywhere in the house. that's strange. I kept thinking to myself as I took a box of milk from the refrigerator and started drinking it. while drinking the milk, I saw a paper in the table addressed to me. I took it and saw that it was hongki's handwriting. I read it:

Jonghun:

Mianhae, if I can't say goodbye to you personally, or if i can't face you when I said goodbye. It hurts me to do this, but I must. It pains me to stay. I must go. Live well without me okay? forget about me. I know you can. Be happy because that's what I want for you. I will always think of you, I will always remember you, when I look at the stars I'll think of only you, Because I Love You. Goodbye, my love.

Hongki

my eyes grew wide as I read the letter. I then rushed out of the house to go and look for him, I may not know where I should look for him, I still went out and looked for him anywhere, just to find him. what was wrong with him? I continually thought as I tried so hard to look for him but to no avail. I then called Seunghyun.

"hey, Jonghun, why did you call so early?" Seunghyun asked.

"help me find hongki!!" I said while running on the streets.

"why? what happened?!?" he asked me.

"he left and I don't know where to find him. try to look for him okay?" I said as I hung up.

we tried to look for him all day but he wasn't anywhere to be found. I sunk in despair. where could he be? what could he be doing now? I asked many questions in my mind, but only one thing came into my mind; He lied to me. he said he'll never leave me, but it was all a lie. and it hurts that I don't know where he is right now or why he left me. this lie I cannot bear. as I was thinking about him that night, tears fell from my eyes. I loved him, there was no one other than him, but he left me. the pain and the lie was very heavy to bear. the pain shot through my heart and it doesn't fade. "Hongki, come home, I'm waiting.".

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here's the next chap..... and sorry if it's taking me a while to update, I'm really very busy with school plus, my internet was so slow this past few days.....

hope you like my update... kekekeke..... and I'll try to update soon again.... ^_^