AUTHOR · writerFairy

CHARACTERS · Illiana Parker (OC), Cho Kyuhyun, SJ (15)

STATUS · Ongoing

DESCRIPTION ·
Illiana comes back from Africa after two years, to be more responsible and care for her younger brother. She doesn't know much about the world anymore, because of lack of communication in the past two years. She meets up with her friend Suzy, who decided to go to a concert.

Kyuhyun is a famous K-pop idol from Super Junior. He wants to be loved and do his job good. He gets in trouble by doing something little that turns out to go big and viral because of his job.

When they meet, they wouldn't dream of falling for one another. But as soon as everyone finds out, the trouble begins.

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STORY TITLE (3/5)
I’ve seen some fics with this kind of title and it makes me think this is a fic about falling in love with a new neighbor.

 

DESCRIPTION, FOREWORD AND TAGS (9/10)
I love everything except posting the characters. I’d rather be mystified about the characters in the story.

 

 

APPEARANCE (10/10)
Beautiful. I envy her. T~T

 

CHARACTERISATION (8/10)
The characters are consistent but using first POV seems not fit with the story.

 

PLOT (9/20)
The story’s a bit cliché, but what totally downed me is that the story is too predictable. I’m just reading chapter 5 or 6 and I already know what will happen till the end.

 

CONSISTENCY/FLOW (7/10)
The flow is okay, it’s just it’s too predictable.

 

GRAMMAR, SPELLING AND PUNCTUATION (15/15)
The overall grammar, spelling and punctuation is okay.

 

STRUCTURE (4/5)
Some paragraphs are too long.

 

READERS’ RESPONSE (5/5)
She’s lucky her readers are not the silent type. How do I get them? T~T  

OVERALL ENJOYMENT (6/10)
Well, honestly, I didn’t enjoy it much coz it was predictable. If I was just an ordinary reader, I would’ve enjoyed this. But because I also write, I got a bit bored.

 

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TOTAL: 76/100

DATE REQUESTED: 28/10/14

DATE COMPLETED: 11/11/2014

REVIEWER: Cheska

COMMENTS:
I hope you don’t take this personally. Your story is good, I’m just not into cliché stories.

REMINDER
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