edited: 160323

Sometimes I wonder - not in the 'oh-what-tea-should-I-have-today', but the serious kind; the 'its-three-am-but-why-am-I-still-awake-thinking-about-this' kind - why I constantly say yes to Kim Jongin without a second thought, and as I stared at his blurry reflection from inside the quiet bar - Tuesday, it was quiet because we were drinking on a Tuesday - I could tell that he was waving his arms around exasperatedly, the waft of smoke from his cigarette circling around his form like a snake. He was enchanting, everyone who met him even once would tell you the same, but he is also quite exasperating to deal with, hence why he couldn't find too many friends his age, and older acquaintances would immediately think of him as a childish nuisance more than anything else. Not that he was a temper throwing toddler - to other people but me, unfortunately - but he had the tendency to think and act like he was way too cool and sleek for his own good. Sure he might have himself fooled, but other people - me included - could see right through his ridicuous little facade, and although it bothered a lot of people, it strangely did not bother me. 

With his move to the apartment building just down the road from mine the week following our first meeting in the height of summer, I had offhandedly asked him to watch a movie that I was going to watch alone regardless of his participation. He said yes without a second thought, and we saw each other every single day since then. It was strangely fast-paced, even from me, a Korean who grew up in New York City and is accustomed to the ridiculously fast relationships that come and go without a second thought. But I am well-versed in Korean culture, and a boy and girl meeting like so soon after they first met is not something that anyone is accustomed to, even in the increasingly westernised metropolitan capital city; Seoul. 

"Did you drink without me?"

"Did you really expected me to wait?"

And he grinned, that beautiful half-assed twirk of the corners of his lips, and I melted inside, without so much as a breath to prepare. He had plopped down in front of me and downed a shot of soju even before taking off his coat, his phone now firnly placed face down on the wooden table. His cheeks were pink with the cold, eyes almost as frosty as the air outside as he his lips off the excess alcohol. Another argument with the missus, no words needed to be said, but the steely hardness of his eyes did not go unnoticed, even with the smile that was forced on for my benefit. I nearly laughed out loud. 

"You might want to go easy on that, woudn't want SM Entertainment to kick out your skinny due to alcoholism" I said absentmindedly, nodding at his freshly poured shot of soju before hastily adding, "Well- not just yet, anyway. You have to debut and buy me eonugh drinks to last a lifetime before they could kick you out."

He snorted with laughter, rolled his eyes, took another sip of beer before turning his smoldering eyes back at me. "Look at me, they're not about to kick out Kim Jongin." 

It was my turn to scoff, taking another shot of soju in one - a little too quickly, honestly - and ran my fingers through my hair. "Oh how would they even live with themselves?"

"Exactly."

Looking as smug as ever, Kim Jongin leaned across the narrow table and brushed my chin with the tips of his fingers. I turned scarlet in the dark.

"The soup stains from earlier, you cow."

"What a darling. Thank you for waiting two hours before telling me."

"You-" He snickered in disbelief, shaking his head at my easy acceptance of his 'insult'.