I was in one of the hotel rooms in Singapore. I was here for the YG Family concert tomorrow and I had been waiting for Seunghyun to show up all day. I couldn’t believe he was late; I bit my lip and fought the urge to join the rest of 2ne1 for lunch. It had been a stressful couple of months for me and all I wanted to do was have dinner with my friend, whom I have not seen for so long. He had been away, filming for his movie Tazza and it was now finally out! Remembering that it topped the charts on the first day, I smiled slightly to myself. Good job, Seunghyun-ah….

Bored, I decided to browse the web. It made me smile a little to see the supportive comments my fans had left on my Instagram accounts and on the fan sites for me. It was nice to know that despite everything, there was still someone supporting me… Out of the corner of my eye, I couldn’t help but notice the trending article. Against my better judgement, I clicked on it to read the comments.

ROOKIE GROUP RELEASES PARK BOM DISS TRACK

#1 [+43,409; -42,167] This is injustice!! Park Bom Should be imprisoned for smuggling drugs!! If this was someone else, they would have been prosecuted! But I guess when you’re in YG, you can get away with anything. Park Bom, if you’d like some , ask GD.

#2 [+25,563; -12,128] Although everything Kemy said is the truth, I feel like she shouldn’t have released this song. She is obviously being disrespectful to her sunbae. I hope this doesn’t hurt A.kor in the future.

#3 [+13,409; -3,167] SO disrespectful. Park Bom, fighting!

Depression hit me again. I couldn’t believe how cruel some people could be. I turned off my phone and wiped away my tears. Nope, not going to shed anymore tears for those who don’t know me. Another surge of emotion hit me when I remember why I needed those drugs in the first place. I started crying again at the thought of her. We were teammates and just like that, one day she was gone… I fell out of my chair and started gasping for air as I remember her collapsing on the field, just like it was yesterday. I could feel my panic attack setting in again… Oh God, I need to breathe! BREATHE, PARK BOM!! I thought desperately to myself. It felt useless; my chest started getting more and more constricted as more memories started flooding in. The first time I met her, our in sync soccer plays, the jokes we used to share, the smiles, the laughs…

Why did you have to go?

“Noona? BOM NOONA!!!” Out of nowhere, Seunghyun immediately came over to my side and held me. “Sshhhh, it’s okay alright? It’s okay, noona. Everything is okay now, alright?” He tenderly wiped away the tears falling from my eyes as I sobbed harder into his chest. He held me for a few more minutes before I finally calmed down and felt the tightness around my chest lightening.

“Ahhh mianhe, Seunghyun-ah.” I said, wiping the tears off my face as I separated myself away from him. He stayed exactly where he was, his gaze soft and comforting.

“It’s okay, noona.” He said softly, biting his lip and looking at me cautiously. I hit him lightly on the arm, wanting to lighten the atmosphere. His expression didn’t change; I noticed that he was looking a little down himself.

“YAH! What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Let’s not pretend today, noona. I’m not that happy either today.” He said darkly, looking away.

I immediately softened. “Why not, Seunghyun?” I asked him, curious.

“Ahhh noona…” He sighed sadly, pouting at me suddenly. I giggled and poked his cheeks.

“Tell your noona what’s wrong.”

“It’s the movie.” He sighed, raking a hand through his hair. I couldn’t believe my ears. He had been so excited about filming this movie after reading the script and actually having a proper love interest for once. What had changed for him? I nudged him, prodding him to tell me more.

“When I go read the comments the people has left online, it makes me wonder why people go to watch the movie at all. At first, I took all the comments about me taking my shirt off…” Ahhhh…. I thought to myself. I immediately knew what this was about. “…I became caught up with wanting the movie to succeed that I promised that I would release topless selcas of myself. There’s nothing wrong with that of course but… I just…” he trailed off, scrunching up his chiselled face as he struggled to find the right words.

“As if all the attention is only focused on your body?” I asked him slowly. He nodded sadly.

He sighed again, looking deep in thought. “I want to be remembered as an artist, you know?” he began slowly. “I took this role because I thought that it would help me grow as an actor but after seeing the reaction, maybe I didn’t do the right thing….” Seunghyun admitted, his voice trailing off.

“Sometimes I wonder, will anyone ever take me seriously as an artist? Obviously, I am not a painter…” He paused, turning to took at me, “…or a sculptor.” He smirked at me as I snorted in response. I think we both remember that mess that he tried to pass off as a sculpture, which currently sits in Big Bang’s dorm because none of them had the heart to tell their hyung what a piece of it was. Fortunately for the 2ne1 girls, I however, did not have such reservations.

“However, I like to think that like Dali, when I shoot a movie or compose a new song, I am creating art. So I’d like to think that whether I act in a movie or rap in a song, I would be able to affect people’s lives; to be able to make them see and experience things differently. To have a new experience or an epiphany.” He finished, his eyes shining with a hopeful glint. He seemed so childlike right now but he was actually so wise. At times like this, I wondered why people would give him a stupid nickname like Bingu. No, he was not Bingu at all…

“Choi Seunghyun…” I said affirmatively. “You are a great actor and a great artist! You DO create works of art everytime you shoot a movie, release a new song or even attend a photoshoot; you ARE a work of art.” We both laughed appreciatively at my last statement. “Don’t let the excitement about seeing your body get to you, okay?” I said, his arm lightly. “Your fans are just erts who get excited about seeing ANY part of you!” We both laughed again.

“Doom Dada was… It was a magnificent piece of art. Very avant-garde.” I told him with a smirk. He grinned happily at me. “I’m sure people will notice your efforts and how good your acting is in the movie too, Seunghyun-ah. Don’t let that get you down; I heard Jiyong telling Chaerin how good your movie was. So don’t sulk around, arasso? I’m sure most of your fans will watch your movie and appreciate what a good job you did in the movie instead of just your abs.”

He smiled confidently as he looked at me in the eye. “You know noona, I was really apprehensive about taking off my clothes for this role but I never realised how much everyone admired my body! I must look damn good.” I rolled my eyes; so much for worrying about his concerns about his body.

I decided to mess with him a little bit. “Why don’t you let noona take a look at it, then?” I asked suggestively as I eyed his torso. He blushed and distanced himself away from me, which only made me laugh again.

“Aish, noona!!” He said, touching his neck self-consciously. I laughed again at him. “I feel bad now. I wanted to cheer you up but you cheered me up instead.” He said sadly, pouting again.

“Awwww chinca? You want to cheer your noona up?” I asked and he nodded. “Buy me some corn then. Don’t let Hwangsabu-nim find out though.” I added quietly. He snickered to himself and reach for a paper bag to his right. My eyes widened when I saw what he had in there.

He smiled lazily as he watched me smiling widely at him. “Ahhh noona… Why are you so predictable?”