~Soohyun’s POV~

“I don’t love you.” The words rang through my head as the girl I’ve loved for the past year walked away, her long brown hair blowing delicately in the wind. Her words stabbed through my heart. I couldn’t move, couldn’t speak. I could only stand and watch her walk away, leaving me out in the cold.

Slowly, I turned and walked back to the dorms where my friends and fellow group members waited. They didn’t know about Chae Min and me, nor was I planning to tell them unless things went well today. Obviously, I’m not telling them anything now.

I entered the dorm to find Kevin and Kiseop sitting on the couch watching a Korean drama together. (They were sitting oddly close to each other too…) “O-Oh! Soohyun!” Kevin quickly scooted away from Kiseop, his cheeks turning bright red as he moved. “You’re home finally. Where have you been?”

“I was just at a meeting. Nothing major.” I said, hanging my jacket on the back of the door. Before either of them could even ask what it was about, I was out of the room and down the hall.

It hurt not telling my group members and close friends about what was going on, but I needed the time to think. Even though I could trust them with anything, I just couldn’t bring myself to talk to any of them about Chae Min. It was my secret and my burden alone to bear. I didn’t want to add any drama or stress on the others. That was the last thing any of us needed.

I lay on my bed and stared at the ceiling. I couldn’t stop thinking about everything that happened in just a span of a few short minutes. We hadn’t been together the entire year I had known her. In fact, we had only been “dating” for the past couple of months. In secret of course, I didn’t want fans knowing about me having a girlfriend, and she didn’t want her family knowing about me. Something about them hating entertainers or something.

A light tap on my door shook me from my thoughts. “Who is it?” I asked, sitting up slightly.

“It’s Kevin. Let me in?” This is just great. One of the only members who knows I won’t deny him if he wants to speak. He was far too delicate to deny. Slowly I got up and opened the door. Kevin walked right in and sat in a nearby chair. “Soohyun what’s wrong? You seemed upset when you got home.”

“I’m fine, Kevin.” I lied, not looking into his eyes.

“You don’t seem fine.”

“I said I’m fine Kevin. I’d like to be alone right now though. So if you don’t mind…”

“Oh,” He sighed, and I saw small glimmer of sadness in his eyes. “Well okay, but dinner’s almost ready.”

“I’m not hungry. Eat without me.” Kevin stared at me for a moment, and his sadness had turned into a look of shock across his face. He knew I was one to never turn down a meal.

“Uh…Okay. Well…I’ll make sure to save you a plate for later.” With that, Kevin got up and walked away.

I sighed and lay back down on my bed. I closed my eyes and let sleep come over me and take away all my thoughts.

~Hoon’s POV~

I’ve spent nearly the entire day doing like I normally have recently, working out and playing sports with other guys in the local gym. Today I was lifting weights and toning my arms. Honestly it didn’t matter what I was doing, so long as it kept my mind off of him.

The gym seemed to be my getaway lately. It wasn’t that U-Kiss was having problems. Well, aside from small individual squabbles every now and again. (Which everyone has at one point or another, right?) No. That wasn’t a problem at all. The problem was having to see our leader, Soohyun, every day.

He wasn’t a bad guy. That’s not why I was avoiding him. Far from it.  In fact he’s so perfect it’s hard for me to look at him. His hair always seemed to fall in the perfect way. His deep brown eyes always had the most beautiful spark of life in them that made me melt whenever I saw them. Not only did he have perfect looks and a perfect body, but his personality was perfect too.  He was kind to the group and leads us well. When anyone starts to get distracted, he smiles and reminds them that we need to get focused and work harder. He makes a fantastic leader.

I had fallen in love with him and no one even knows. Even if our group tells each other everything, there’s just some things I would rather them not know. Not until I figure it all out for myself anyway.

I continued to work out until about 7pm. By then my body was more than exhausted from being overworked and I knew I’d pay for it later. It didn’t matter that much however. I’d survive.

When I came back home the others were staring at me as if they’d just seen a ghost, or God. “Are you guys okay?” I stood in front of them with a confused look on my face “You look like you just saw God.”

“We thought you may have been Eli. Apparently he and Kevin here had a little falling out.” AJ said. That’s odd. Eli and Kevin never fight.

“I’m sorry Kev, I hope everything works out.” He just shrugged and leaned back on the couch. Poor kid. He’s always so happy. I’ve never seen him annoyed like this before.

I walked into the kitchen and quickly ate the plate of food the guys had left for me. Then I noticed another plate wrapped up. Had someone not eaten yet?

Dongho walked in and grabbed a soda from the refrigerator. “Hey Dongho, what’s the extra plate of food for?”

“That? It’s Soohyun’s. He said he doesn’t want to eat. Weird huh?” With that, he walked back out.

That’s extremely weird. Soohyun never turns down food, especially nights like this when we have chicken. I picked up his plate of food and a pair of chop sticks and started walking to his room. Whether he wanted to eat or not, I was going to make sure he did.

I knocked softly on his door and waited for him to come open it for me. I didn’t get an answer the first time, so I knocked a little louder this time. “Soohyun, it’s Hoon. Will you open the door for me?”

He cracked the door slightly and looked at me. His eyes were slightly red and puffy, and his cheeks appeared tear-stained. “What do you want?”

My heart broke seeing him like this. His normally beautiful smile was replaced with a dull expression. “I-I uh brought you dinner.” I held out the plate to him. He looked down at the plate before looking at me.

“I’m not hungry.” He said. I forcefully held my palm against the door before he could shut it in my face. He glared, putting more force against the door trying to close it. Lucky for me, I was still stronger than him even though my muscles were still pretty worn out from earlier.

“I don’t care. You need to eat.” I pushed the door open and walked into his room. He stood nearby and just stared at me. “Sit.” He shook his head. This wasn’t like him at all. “Just… Eat a few bites of it, okay?”

He sighed. “I don’t want to eat.” I held the pair of chopsticks and sat the plate on my lap. Picking up a piece of chicken carefully, I held it out to him. He watched me for a moment and sighed. I thought he was going to get up and force me out. But instead, he did the exact opposite. He slowly ate the chicken off the chopsticks I held in my hand.

My heart pounded inside of my chest so hard I felt like it was going to burst. Why couldn’t he just take the chopsticks from me? He opened his mouth afterwards and I put more on the chopsticks. Soohyun continued to eat only when I fed him like he was a child.

Once he was finally finished, I sat the plate on the nightstand and tapped my hands nervously on my legs. He smiled at me slightly, making my heart pound even harder. I picked up the plate once more, got up and began to walk out of the room. “Hoon,” I turned hearing Soohyun say my name. His voice cracked slightly. “Thank you.”

I walked out smiling. “I’m always going to be there for you,” I responded and shut the door, leaving him alone. When I was far enough down the hall to think he wouldn’t hear me, I whispered, “because I love you.”