equilibrium

of finite and desperate things.

--

Our days are numbered. We exist to disappear and we live to die. No matter how many writers try to romanticize death, it will always be what it is—death. So painfully so.

To think that one day, I will be nothing more than a memory, that I will exist nowhere other than in some stranger’s thoughts—that scares me beyond measures. I am doubtful that I can ever be the way I was, the way I was before I came to know reality. I guess that’s the thing about ignorance—it’s blissful.

Elsa, my dear, oblivion is near. Elsa, my dear, oblivion is destiny.

--

Sungyeol stares into space, fingers idly tapping unspecific rhythms on the wooden tabletop. Myungsoo sits across from him, thumbing through an old photo album, humming softly to no one in particular, certainly not Sungyeol.

Sungjong clears his throat. Contrasting the other two, Sungjong is anything but comfortable. The two turn to face him, mechanically and synchronized. All you have to do now is figure out which one is real. It whispers. Two maniacal grins are offered to him in return.

--

I have news from afar. My dearest Elsa, oblivion is nigh. Tonight, this very night, the distant planets align. Our doom is but a hairbreadth away, and we cannot do anything but watch from this void. I sometimes regret my decision to evacuate. Our home planet is being destroyed and we can do nothing but pray it won’t affect us. But with each passing moment, God becomes a little bit less real and I cannot believe in anything besides myself and you.

Elsa, my dear, I’m afraid that everything we love will be doomed. If only I could have saved one of our children, perhaps then we wouldn’t be so lonely. But misfortune knows no bound and we will always be victims to the cruel hands of fate.

Elsa, my dearest, oblivion is nigh.

--

Sungjong knows this place. He knows it so well, he could roam around with his eyes closed and not destroy anything in the process. But at the same time, this place is foreign. It is not his home, no, this is but a mere illusion. They are digging through his memories and surely this can’t be anything but a physical projection. They know too much, they are rummaging through his brain, they are trying to find It. But he won’t let them. No, this is humanity’s last chance, It is the only thing that can save them from oblivion.

Sungyeol smiles, tilting his head with a style of grace the real Sungyeol would never hope to possess. Myungsoo mimics Sungyeol’s tilt, but in the opposite direction. It’s calculated and precise and perfect—none of these traits belong to the people he loved. Both of them are fake. He hears It say. It is also living in his brain and it’s only a matter of time before they find It. He’ll be destroyed if they ever find It, but for now, it’s tucked away in a safe, secluded corner. But it won’t be hidden forever. It is only buying him so much time. For now, they do not know that he knows this place isn’t real. He tries his best to act like he’s comfortable. He knows that the aliens do not know what comfortable looks like, for all they know, his nervousness is normal. Sungjong swallows a lump when he notices something. It only lasted a slight second, but he felt the magnetic pulse. He definitely felt it.

Someone other than him had survived the wreckage. This is it. This is it, he thinks. Someone’s here, It whispers. Someone’s coming for us. Prepare yourself.

--

Elsa, dearest, something has happened. According to my calculations, Earth should have been destroyed seconds ago, but there it is, sitting still and peaceful. Someone has done something Elsa, and I fear that they are only adding onto the damage. While preventing oblivion is possible, it is only possible for so long. Soon, the song will be played and I fear its melody has just been tampered with. This will take a turn for the worst, Elsa.

For now, I can only watch. But soon, soon I promise, it will be over and we will have survived it.

--

A minute has passed since Sungjong had felt the pulse. He knows the aliens definitely cannot feel this, so it was meant as a message for the surviving humans. But for what? Will there be a riot? How many people have survived? Can they perform an unplanned simultaneous operation perfectly? Obviously something will go wrong.

Another pulse, two of them, this time. He knows this one. One pulse is undefined, two pulses is a code. They are breaking out. But how? Sungjong knows he’d arouse suspicion if he were to get up and wander around. But they don’t know that he’s the carrier. They can kill him and It along with him and they’ll never know it. It’s the safest thing for Sungjong to kill himself, but he can’t because without It, the humans will never win. Sungjong is conflicted. What if they start picking off the survivors? What if they find It or had a method of recognizing it all along? What if this is a trap and there are no other humans? Sungjong couldn’t risk breaking out without a clear message.

He shifts in his chair. Immediately Sungyeol’s and Myungsoo’s head snaps in his direction, mechanically stiff, but he keeps his eyes focused on the TV in front of him, pretending not to notice the slipup. His hand is positioned directly over his left shoe. He presses the hidden buttons on his shoe and feels the pulse go out of the room. He wasn’t sure if this was a trap, so he only sends out one. The aliens don’t move. He internally sighs in relief. He sends a specified wavelength and questions the operation and the identity of the survivor(s). He doesn’t get an immediate response and is suddenly panicked.

They are getting closer and closer to It. He can feel the mental prodding. It should only be a few more minutes before they find it and only a few more seconds then for them to extract It. Sungjong feels a response wavelength.

3 survivors must escape with It intact.

--

Isn’t it funny how the very thing that can save humanity is the very key to its demise? I wish I would have never created It. Elsa, dear, you had warned me and if only I had listened then. There are soldiers trapped on earth now, no doubt, fighting against the aliens. But destruction is inevitable. Oh, Elsa, I cannot live knowing that I am the person who had caused Earth’s destruction but what can I do now? I should have saved all the people I could have, I know, but our resources are limited and this void can only hold us so much longer. Earth needs to be destroyed for us to live. It’s selfish, but it’s reality.

Elsa, please don’t look at me like that. I know you resent me every day for creating It, but the government had wanted It and I had been foolish to believe we can control such a power. We never did find anyone compatible with It, huh? Too bad. It would have been a great weapon.

--

Sungjong feels It trying to break out of the confine Sungjong had put it in. It was a mental barrier Sungjong had learned to erect, but it will only keep the prodders out for so long. They already know he has it. They definitely know since he would be the only one with so many layers of protection raised. Sungjong just hoped that the others had half a brain to do the same, not to protect It, but to protect themselves.

Sungjong releases another pulse and patiently (as patient as he can currently be) awaits a reply.

You won’t escape without my help. It says, clearly angry about the way Sungjong had confined It. Stop calling me It. I have a name. The professor had given me a name before he vanished. Sungjong wants to tell It to stop talking, to stop drawing attention to itself, but he can’t verbally communicate, not while the aliens are scrutinizing his thoughts and his physical self.

I know this thing, whatever it is, will find me. But we’ve got time. You need to sync with me. You are 98% compatible, you must do it and we can save humanity. Sungjong knows It is lying. Sungjong isn’t compatible with it at all, in fact, the only person they found that was compatible with It had died when they tried to sync them. He was a mistake, you know it. I told them that he and I were not compatible but they insisted that he was a perfect match. Your human scientists think they know better, but they didn’t. I do not lie, and you know it perfectly well.

Sungjong does not budge. If they sync, he will have to take down his mental barriers and it would take less than a minute for the prodders to find them, though syncing only takes a few seconds. He wouldn’t have enough time to resurrect the barriers and if the sync fails, he would die and It would be captured.

We are compatible. I can make this work.

Sungjong clenches his jaw. He is not sacrificing himself for some AI’s nonsense.

My name is Hoya. It insists. You will sync with me, whether you like it or not.

Suddenly, everything was black.

--

My love, this is astonishing. Someone has successfully synchronized with Hoya! Oh, you dislike the fact that I have named it, but it gets confusing, really. But you should not be hung over such a trivial thing. This is amazing—someone has actually done it. Humanity could be saved, that is the new reality, darling.

Yes, I know you are bitter about what Hoya had done to your brother. He was not compatible, I had told everyone that, even you, but no one had listened to me. You all claimed that I was being selfish, that I didn’t want to separate from Hoya. Though I was attached to Hoya, I am not that person, I am no mad scientist.

My love, Elsa, humanity could be restored. Whoever this person is, they don’t even need to be a good soldier, so long as Hoya is in control the world can be saved. You do not seem pleased, Elsa. Tell me why?

Oh, you are silly. A personality of its own? Hoya is simply a program, it could never feel, no, don’t be ridiculous.

Hoya cannot feel, rest assured my dearest.

--

Sungjong blinks his eyes open, groggy for some reason. He immediately remembers where he is and straightens up. There was no one in the room. It was white, completely white. The projection of his apartment had gone away, as had Sungyeol and Myungsoo, or at least their imitators.

You are awake. Hoya states, sounding much clearer than before.

“Yes,” Sungjong responds before he can help it. He immediately places his hands in front of his mouth.

Do not worry, the aliens are accounted for.

“What did you do? Where are the other survivors?”

You and I were compatible so I began the synchronizing process. If you had allowed me access, I would have not needed to knock you out. There were no other survivors. That was all the aliens’ doing. If you had synched with me sooner I would’ve been able to tell you that.

“No survivors?” Sungjong’s heart plummeted. He was alone. “Are you sure?”

I did a scan. There are no humans within the building.

“What about outside?”

I can detect several life forms, but I cannot distinguish their origin at this distance.

“What’s going to happen?”

I do not know. There are no answers in my database.

Sungjong sighs, leaning against the cold white wall.

“Well,” Sungjong begins. It seems as if they’re going to be stuck together for a while, he might as well try to make it work. “For starters, how does saving the world sound?”

It sounds impossible.

“You’re honest, aren’t you?”

I was not programmed to be otherwise. Would you like me to be dishonest?

“No. How about we make the impossible possible?”

Are you talking about saving the world?

“Yes.”

The statistics say it’s highly unlikely, but the professor has always told me to have a bit of faith in humans. I do not know what that means but I will have faith in you. Let’s save the world.

A/N

a comeback from star? she's still relevant? you betcha i'm back.

anyway i was marathoning redvsblue because yes and i suddenly felt inspired and this happened. it sort of spiraled out of control, but i feel like this could become a series. who knows? for now, it's a oneshot, but you can definitely expect more from this universe. i have several other long!fics i'm working on so something else should be coming along. i guess that doesn't really matter because i don't have lots of readers anyway but whatever.

but wow, AFF has changed since the last time i posted. i am sorry i left on an unannounced indefinite hiatus with an exo fic. i sincerely apologize. but anyway, thank you for reading and i am sorry for being a poopbutt and not responding to your kind comments. know that i do read them, though.

anyway, see y'all soon with either a battle royale! au or a mechamagic!au (yes, i'm pretending mechamagic is a thing and that you are all aware of it)