It started off as a normal day. He walked through the doors of the SM Building as he did every day, and turned to greet the receptionist. Only there was no receptionist at the desk. That's odd. He thought as he entered the elevator, pushing the button for the 69th floor. That's when he out. 

---

Suho awoke hours later, laying on the floor of one of the practice rooms. 

"Gee willikers my head!" He exclaimed, clutching his forehead and blinking slowly, taking in his surroundings. He heard a groan from across the room. It was a small, cream colored llama.

"Amber!" he said as he ran to embrace his friend, only to be spit on by the animal. "I missed you too!" he replied, using his dad handkerchief to wipe the saliva off his face.

He heard noises coming from the adjoining rooms. Hopping onto Ambllama's back, he shouted "Onward my noble steed!" She let out a fart and ran out of the room.

---

In the room to the right, they found a man with giant sausages for arms named Taeyang, SM's/Bring Me The Horizon's lead screamer Jessica Jung, some dickhole Jackson, and a fedora wearing Eunji. The pair greeted them all with dad jokes and spit.

In the room to the left, they found only one person and his large member filling the entire room.

"Hi I'm P-Goon and this is my monstercock," he introduced himself, holding out his tip. Suho grabbed the head of P-Goon's and shook it gingerly. 

---

The seven of them went on to search for others when the first announcement happened. 

"Hello you bastards," Suho knew that voice, "I bet you'd like to know who I am or why you're here. I'll tell you! But first you have to report to the gym."

The group looked at each other, silently agreeing to follow the announcement. 

--- 

Once at the gym, all the idols were together. Along with the seven from before there was Memejae, Ken Me Boy, SLAAAAAAYJONG, a small bush baby, Park Bom, Hoya, and Shindingdong shindingdong shinadingdingadingdingding, and some white guy. 

"What are we all le doing he-" but before Troll Face could finish his question, someone wearing a black and white bear fursuit descended from the ceiling.

"No it can't be..." Suho said under his breath. He climbed off Amber and stepped closer to the figure. It was him.

"IT IS I DO KYUNGSOO AND YOURE ALL MY ES NOW," he screamed, his furry s shooting out confetti. 

"Ayo hyunger what the saranghae are we diggily doin' here?" Chad Future asked.

"YOURE HERE TO KILL EACH OTHER." 

The group gasped except for Sungjong who continued to glare at his arch nemesis. 

"Why why?"

"FOR MY ENJOYMENT UPUPUPUPUPUPU," he held his belly as he threw his head back, laughing. Everyone looked around at each other's faces of disbelief. Whispers of "this can't be real," "this has to be a joke," and "JYP" were the only things that could be heard as the news set in.

"LET ME EXPLAIN. IVE TRAPPED YOU IN THE SM BUILDING AND THE ONLY WAY TO ESCAPE IS TO KILL SOMEONE-"

"Yo that's it I'll kill someone right now someone fight me," Jackson ripped off his wifebeater and put on his snapback. 

"NOT SO FAST DOUCHEYMCGEE. TO GET OUT YOU MUST GET AWAY WITH MURDER. AFTER THREE PEOPLE HAVE FOUND A BODY WE WILL HOLD AN INVESTIGATION. AFTER THE INVESTIGATION IS A TRIAL TO FIND THE MURDERER. THEN YOU ALL VOTE ON WHO YOU THINK IT IS. IF YOURE RIGHT ONLY THE MURDERER GETS EXECUTED."

"And what if we're wrong?" Taeyang asked.

"HOLY WILL YOU JUST LET ME EXPLAIN? IF YOURE WRONG THEN THE MURDERER CAN LEAVE THE BUILDING BUT ILL EXECUTE ALL OF YOU WHO WERE WRONG."

Everyone was shocked. Could we really kill each other? Are there people plotting right now? 

"OH AND TWO MORE RULES FOR YOU MCSHIGGYS. YOU CAN HAVE ACCOMPLICES BUT ONLY THE MURDERER GETS EXECUTED IF CAUGHT. AND YOU CAN ONLY KILL TWO PEOPLE AT A TIME," Kyungsoo stopped as he realized something.

"WAIT A SECOND, THERES 15 OF YOU BUT ONLY 14 ROOMS. WELL I GUESS WE CAN START THE KILLING NOW. WELL VOTE ON WHO WE WANT TO DIE."

One of Kyungsoo's manslaves Chanyeol passed out paper and pens to all the idols. Each of them hesitated in putting down their vote, except for Sungjong who wrote it down immediately. Once the papers were collected, Kyungsoo began to tally the votes.

"THATS ONE VOTE FOR "THE GIANT THAT SMELLS LIKE MAYONAISE" AND 14 VOTES FOR CHAD FUTURE. LOL BYE CHAD." 

Suddenly, a stampede of Chad Future haters burst through the door. Their screams pierced the ears of everyone in the room. Before Chad could react, the stampede trampled him. When the scene cleared, the group gathered around what was left of him: a few strands of dyed hair and a pair of ty sunglasses. 

"THAT SOLVES THAT PROBLEM. YOUR ROOM KEYS AND ID CARDS WILL BE DISTRIBUTED BY CHANYOLO," Kyungsoo ed the buttflap on his fursuit and violently all over the stage, "HAVE FUN SMELLING MY POOP ES." And with that, he ascended back into the ceiling. 

Great googily moogily. Thought Dadho as Shindong farted on Chad's remains.