They met for the first time during Chinese class. The girl was taking out her books from her bag when he barged in, out of breath; apologizing for coming late because of soccer practice. She remembers thinking ”he plays soccer?” when he sat down beside her. Mostly because of his messy hair and slightly chubby appearance, no, he’s not even close to her ideal type. The whole lesson passed without a single word between them.

 

They met again during a county dance for graduating classes. Perhaps it was too awkward and weird, but she went up to talk to him when she saw him, and perhaps it was awkward when he asked her to dance with him as well. It should have been awkward when he took her hand in his and put his other hand on her lower back, yet nothing about it was. They were almost the same height and his hair was still somewhat messy. Her friends were giggling in the back and she turned to look him in the eyes, definitely not her ideal type.

    

They met for the third time in the airport, forth time on a party held by the school they had both managed to get into.

       

She stopped counting when they started taking Chinese classes together. It was odd, the comfortable feeling she had with him. Chinese class took place on Tuesdays and she remembers how tiring it was. She remembers how after each class she would go to her lockers before meeting him at his. Walking in the snow to the train station together and riding the bus together as evening came became a routine for every Tuesday afternoon. And it was odd, how she seemed to always look forward to those days.

     

Their train rides were often filled with teasing, jokes and laughter. Maybe it was one Tuesday afternoon on the train back home, when they were cramped in the middle and their faces were centimeters apart that she realized how perfect the situation would have been. If only he was her ideal type.

    

 Another time was when he was at her place and they were laying in bed, just talking about things. Talking about the girl he liked. And she didn’t think too much when he hugged her, explaining that this was the way he hugged the girl he liked.

       

Only afterwards, she remembers the time he took her hands in his when she said they were cold, the time he held her hand when they were walking to the train station. Those times he hugged her tightly, when she was about to get off the bus, when they bumped into each other around school or simply because she needed it. Confusingly, she doesn’t even know what her ideal type is anymore.

 

They never bumped into each other at school after their last Chinese class together ended and she didn’t know that they would only meet again the day of graduating freshman year.

 

 Another summer passed and they started sophomore year. But nothing was like freshman year anymore.

 

The only time they met was in the hallways, a quick hug before both going to their separate classes. He started to get more friends around school, he started working out and perhaps she thought, that she had gone blind. For she saw him one day with his hair styled up and not as chubby as before and she just couldn’t resist going up to him. Once again letting him hug her and she wished that he wouldn’t let go so soon.

 

Perhaps she truly realized how much it has changed between them when he came over to help her with math at her house. She realized how far away he was when he told her he only came over to help her with math. And only then she came to understand their past.

 

They are on their way to the train as she asks him to hold her hand. He tells a joke and she is looking down as she laughs. Like this, she fails to see the way he is bending forward slightly to look at her with a smile on his face. If she had paid him more attention, she would have noticed him doing that every time she is laughing.

 

She keeps telling herself that she doesn’t like him, she can’t like him.

He likes another girl and he barely cares about her anymore. He has his friends and parties to attend to now, and she has another boy that cares about her and does everything she has expected from a boy.

 

But somehow, everything the other boy does makes her think about him again, because no matter how kind he is, he’s not him.

 

Too bad the other boy isn’t her ideal type.

 

 

 

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i i'm sorry i just have so many exams i should go study now. kay bye this was written so quickly and it can be.. id unno maybe it's too personal idk maybe i'll delete it later