It was so cold.

Jonghyun curled up into a ball as he hid in the deep, vast sea. Everywhere around him was black, black and black.

Pure darkness.

When was the last time he saw the light? When was the last time he felt the sun kissing his bronze skin? When was the last time he heard…laughter?

His silver eyes glowed in the blue water, staring up at the surface that was colored orange. He knew it was early morning.

When was the last time he ever got sleep? Ever since he was drowned, he received this life as a… as a…

“Monster,” he croaked out, his own voice hardly audible.

He looked down, eying his long, scaly tail. The length was almost remarkable, its shape of one that looks like a dragon. He reached down to touch it, feeling the smooth scales press against his fingertips.

Ever since he lived his life as a monster, he became lonely.

Never receiving the love from his own friends, nor his parents, he became lonely.

And that loneliness grew into hatred and jealousy.

Every time, he’d think to himself, every time I see them.

Them, being children.

Jonghyun grew envious of their happy smiles, their blissful laughter echoing in his head. He grew resentful of how their parents played with them, eyes full of love and care as they laughed together.

He never received any of that.

And it was seriously annoying.

That’s how the horror came to be when a little boy curiously approached him—him, whose face was half-covered in the sea, his silver eyes glaring at the human in front of him. Him, whose hands gripped onto the child’s shirt, ignoring its cries as he dragged him underwater.

Him…who killed the poor child by his own hands, rendering him alive as the water turned red.

That resentment then turned into guilt.

Every day, he would remember their faces: men, women, children alike, he can remember them. Their wide, scared eyes, their struggling arms, their crying faces before they turned into one that are hardly recognizable anymore.

Jonghyun would go down deep, deep into the sea, deep into the darkness to hide himself, so he could cry in silence.

He hated what he had become.

He knew that he will never find anyone who understood him.

He knew that he will never feel love – he probably doesn’t even know of it in the first place anyway.

Jonghyun stared up at the orange, rippling surface as he felt it.

Someone was coming into his area.

However, it puzzled him.

This presence…this aura…

Why was this person not scared of this place?

After a few killings, nobody goes around his area anymore. And when they do, it’s out of recklessness or curiosity.

This one was neither of the two.

He saw him.

He could see his distorted appearance on the surface as the boy looked into the water, staring out as if expecting.

Jonghyun was strangely intrigued by this…this boy.

Slowly, he swam up, his face appearing from the surface.

His silver eyes met brown irises. Deep, warm chocolate brown irises.

Jonghyun stared at the brunet in front of him who stared back at him, interest sparkling in his eyes.

His heartbeat was dead, but it was as if somebody had shocked them to life as he silently examined his features.

Beautiful, silky black hair. He had the most beautiful ebony locks that tousled gently against the wind. His face was smooth and rounded, and he had the cutest button nose. His lips were bow-shaped, plump and pink. His skin was milky pale, but that was what made him attractive.

Too attractive.

That human…the boy…he looked beautiful.

Jonghyun stared into his feline eyes. They shone brightly with confidence and it was something that he admired. They shone with interest, and that was something he didn’t expect.

Someone was willing to risk his life to see him.

Not to be eaten by him, not to be killed by him, but to see him. To make him believe that he was not what people thought him to be as? Jonghyun wanted to laugh, if he could, for he had forgotten how. He saw the pity in his eyes and he wanted to scream in joy.

For, at last, someone had finally noticed him not as a monster, but as a person who died a tragic death.

But he couldn’t.

And that’s the sad part.

Because everyone he sees reminds him of betrayal. And every laughter he hears causes his jealousy to grow. And when his jealousy grows, he get reminded of his guilt. It’s a constant cycle that he cannot get out of.

He feared that he might end up killing the beautiful boy in front of him too.

The ‘monster’ snapped his head to his hand that reached out hesitantly. He saw them. Those fingers that were eager to touch. The boy wanted to feel him. He wanted to feel his face, his body…everything.

He grabbed his wrist tightly in reflex, his sharp nails stabbing against his pale, beautiful skin. Jonghyun could feel the boy’s heartbeat start to quicken.

This wasn’t what he wanted. He didn’t want him to panic. He didn’t want him to be scared of him, not when he came here with a strong mind!

Jonghyun led his shaking hand to his forehead, feeling the warm fingertip press against his cold skin.

The boy no longer trembled. He watched with sparkling brown eyes now, as the boy opened his eyes to look at him.

Then he purred.

He closed his eyes and purred, that low sound vibrating in his throat when he felt his fingers trailing down his cheeks. They felt like butterflies fluttering against his skin, kissing him softly.

When was the last time he even felt butterflies on his skin?

He didn’t know.

How strange was that he could still remember his death like it was yesterday, when supposedly, when you’ve died, you no longer remember a thing of your past life?

It’s the completely opposite for him. He even remembers his own name.

Jonghyun looked at him and saw him grinning. Weirdly, he wanted to copy that expression. He want to do the same as him. He felt fingers exploring his face: his eyelids, his nose, and his cheeks. But then…

His lips.

Those were the most sensitive parts of all.

No one should touch them.

Jonghyun jumped back and snarled at him, sharp teeth glistening white. His brown eyes flickering to icy silver as he glared darkly at the boy in front of him before submerging into the water. His tail flexed as he swam away from the rocks, reappearing in a much safer distance.

He glared at the boy then, the upper half of his face shown in the ocean.

Disgraceful human, he thought to himself. Just disgraceful!

But the boy was not hurt by this action and instead, kept his hand out there in the air, waiting for him to return.

“Come on,” he whispered in a soft tone. “Don’t be scared.”

Jonghyun was lucky to have half his face submerged, because surely, when it’s impossible, he felt his cheeks burn. His soft voice was comforting and made him think twice.

Maybe he should have trusted him better.

Glaring at him again, he slowly swam back to him, his cheek meeting his hand once again. He even dared touched his lips again but he held back the urge to snarl at him. He, however, flinch back a little, but never made a movement against it.

He was attracted to him.

His dead heart was beating much faster and surely, he knew what this means.

The ‘monster’ cursed his luck, for he could only speak when underwater. And clearly, the boy cannot breathe nor hear him underwater, so it was out of the options.

He let out a small noise to attract his attention and stared into his eyes to convey his feelings.

He was in love.

Hopelessly in love with a human. A beautiful, young human that was full of life.

Jonghyun’s lips began to twitch as he struggled, the ends curving up before finally making a grin. It was awkward, he knew, for he didn’t know how long since he has last grinned like this. He grinned even brighter when the boy grinned back.

He purred when the brunet petted his head, his fingers gathering his silky white hair.

“You have been living in the sea for so long…” Jonghyun stopped purring, his movement frozen. “Without being loved…”

His eyes dimmed.

It’s true…he thought sadly to himself. A sudden constriction in his chest made him pull back, his face scrunching up in pain before diving back into the water, his face engulfed by the large pool of liquid as he dove down, going deep into the ocean.

His hand clutched onto his bare chest, trying to constrict the pain.

“It hurts…!” He whimpered, salty tears falling down his cheeks and escaping into the cool, vast area of the marine. He looked up at the surface to feel the disappointment of the boy radiating off from the surface.

“Love…”

Then he knew.

His chest wasn’t the one aching.

It was his heart.

His heart was the one aching to be loved.

And the boy was willing to give him that chance.

He knew he was.

With joy filling up his body and his want to go back to him, he swam up. He swam up in such speed, that he burst out of the ocean, creating a massive splash of water, landing onto a body.

Jonghyun saw him, his face so dangerously close to his. And without a second, he pressed his cold, blue lips against warm, pink ones.

He was kissing him.

His lips tingled due to the sensitiveness, but this time, it was the good kind of sensitive. It was pleasuring.

And he wants more.

His hands crept up to his neck, bringing himself closer to the human boy, not caring if his wet, bare chest was making him uncomfortable as he kissed him. And when he kissed him back, it all made sense now.

The boy was sent here to make him feel loved.

Was this God’s work of art? He thanked him greatly for giving him such reward.

It wasn’t long until he pulled away, the latter gasping for air. He felt his eyes on his tail, but they didn’t last long when his brown eyes met his. Jonghyun stared at his face with curiosity, confused of the feeling, yet he loved it. And he still wanted more.

Leaning in, he pressed his lips against the boy’s once again, and it seems that the brunet did not mind as he pulled him into a deep kiss.

After not having experienced any of this since his death at a young age, he deserved this feeling.

He deserved love.

After their kiss, the monster boy dragged himself across the rocks, slithering back into the ocean. Jonghyun turned in the water and gave him that same awkward grin, but he was getting more used to it, the action more realistic and human this time.

He pressed his finger his lips, mentally telling him that it’s a secret. Their secret. Nobody but him were allowed to know this side of the ‘monster’ they’ve always known. He was grateful when the brunet smiled and nodded, keeping it confidential.

Staring at his bow-shaped lips, he wanted one more. He pressed himself up to the edge, his hands on the rocks as he held his head up high, eyes closed. He expected him to do what he wanted—as he did, as he felt his warm lips onto his cold ones. However, it was only for a moment, but it was enough to satisfy him.

Jonghyun turned away and submerged into the ocean, disappearing into the darkness.

He smiled to himself, his hand over where his heart as he swam.

He knew that he had finally found love.

He got his deserved love that he has always longed for.

One day, it shall be repaid…