Ch. 10
You're Not Something I Want To Lose
*Your POV*
You closed the door after sending your brother and his wife off.
“Tired?” Jackson asked me.
“You’re not leaving yet?”
“No, not yet. Want me to leave so you can sleep?” I nodded.
“But you can stay, I’ll just go to bed.”
“What that suppose to mean? Aren’t you suppose to keep my company because I’m your guest?”
“No, that’s my little brother’s job.” I said.
“Okay, I’ll leave. Get a lot of rest for tomorrow. See you at school.” He said and headed towards the door. “Also, make sure you locked your window. Stay safe.” He said and pecked me cheeks and ran out the door.
“Weirdo.”
“I saw that.” Chang Min said.
“I did too.” My mom said from behind Chang Min.
“I’m going to take a shower now.” I said and walked past them.
After my shower I went and lay down on my bed and thought to myself. I checked my window to see if it’s locked and yes it was. I then went to my desk and put my stuff into my bag that way I wouldn’t forget it tomorrow morning. I just then hopped into bed suddenly I received a text message. I ignored it the first time but then it went on again. I grabbed it and looked at it.
“2 New Messages.” I slide to unlock my phone and viewed the messages.
“Are you asleep yet? -Jackson”
“Can we talk? -Jackson”
Just then I received another text.
“I mean can we text. :) -Jackson”
I smiled.
“Was just about to sleep but then you texted me and yes we can text, aren’t we already. -____”
“Great. I was just wondering but did you remember anything at all?”
“No.”
“Then I guess you wouldn’t understand.”
“Understand what?”
“Nothing.” He texted back. “Are you tired? If so I’ll let you sleep. We both have school tomorrow anyways.”
“Okay, goodnight.”
“Goodnight. :D”
I put my phone away and then headed to bed. A bit after I drove off to dreamland.
I was in a dark room or just somewhere dark. I stood up but there was nobody. I couldn’t see anything except for my white dress. I kept walking around but everything was just so dark I couldn’t see anything. I sat down and just cried. Alone I cried.
“Who’s there?”
“Ka Yee?” His name suddenly slipped out of my mouth. “Why did I just say that?” I thought to myself.
“Who are you?” He asked.
“Ka Yee.” I repeated noticing it was him and smile.
“____? What are you doing here?” He asked me.
“It’s so dark and lonely here. But you’re so bright that I’m happy.”
“Come on, hold my hand. Don’t let go of me.” He said reaching out his hand to me. I held his hand as we both just walked to nowhere.
“Come on let’s go through here.” He said. I was still beside him but he looked shock as if I wasn’t beside him. It took only a second. I blinked my eye and he disappeared and again I was in darkness alone again.
“How come he left me just like that.” I thought to myself and cried again.
I woke up with tears streaming down my face.
“I’m crying?” I wiped away the tears. I ignored my dream and went back to sleep when I realized I still have about three more ours to sleep. But some how something just didn’t feel right.
It was time to get up and get ready for school. I made my way down the stairs quickly grabbing a toast with butter spread on it. I made my way out the door and headed for the bus stop. I sat down on the bus and then just waited for my stop. I got off my stop and made my way to school.
“____.” I was called as soon as I reached the front gate. I turned around to find Mark there.
“What is it?”
“Do you like Jackson?”
“This isn’t the kind of time to e talking about this stuff.” I said and turned around.
I suddenly felt my wrist being grabbed and getting dragged away.
“Yah!” I pulled my hand away. “Let me go. If you want to talk ask properly and do it properly.” I said and turned around to start walking away.
“How am I suppose to do that? You don’t answer my text, you won’t listen to me. You’ll just run off after seeing Jackson.” He said as I heard pain within his words.
“He’s hurt. Have I been doing that all along?” I thought to myself. “I did walk away from him in the library but that was because..my legs and mouth just did that on it’s own. I never received any text from him.” I thought to myself. I checked my phone and had five messages from him and two missed calls. “This doesn’t make sense. I checked my phone yesterday and this morning. I didn’t even see these or get notifications. Is my eyes and ears deceiving me?” I thought, a bit shocked on my own.
“And now you’re not even listening.” He said and walked pass me bumping into my shoulder. I stared at his back walking away.
“I’ve seen this before, but it wasn’t Mark’s back. Who’s was is.” I thought as I continued to stare at his back going farther and farther away.
“Why does nothing make sense at all?” I thought as I slumped down on my chair in class.
“____ is something wrong?” My teacher asked me.
“Yeah, something’s definitely wrong.”
“And what is that?” He asked as I sat in silence thinking.
“____? May I ask what is wrong?” He added after I went silent.
“Teacher you won’t understand.” I said and then left the room and headed to the rooftop.
“Nothing makes sense to me at all.” I sat at the rooftop in silence thinking to myself and ended up falling asleep there.
*Jackson’s POV*
I was sitting in class when I saw a quick flash of ____ at the corner of my class door. I blinked and then she disappeared.
“Why would she be here? She’s already back as ____.” I thought. “That look that I saw looked sad and lost as if she was waiting. Like the one I saw in my dream.” My eyes widen.
Suddenly the room became dark. This time she was bright.
“Ka Yee, it won’t take long until you disappear from my memories. ____ won’t remember them but I will. If you don’t hurry then these memories will not ever return. I won’t remember you. ____ will live on with the memories she have now, but not when I remember you. Ka Yee, please even as ____ let me be at ease. Let me be the soul and be me who remembers you. I don’t want to lose someone like you.” She said sadly and faded.
“____!” I suddenly yelled. Everyone in class looked at me all weird.
“Jackson is something wrong?” My teacher asked.
“M-may I go out for some air.” He nodded. I stood up and headed up to the rooftop.
When I arrived a I saw ____ asleep there.
I walked over to her and sat beside her right before she was a gonna fall. We stayed like that until I actually fell asleep with her too.
*Mark’s POV*
I was out of class because the teacher had to go somewhere so the class was released early. I then saw Jackson heading up the stairs. I followed slowly and silently behind him. until I figured he was heading to the rooftop. As I heard the door close I waited a bit and then opened it. I found Jackson and ____ sleeping up there.
“Did they plan to come up here?” I thought as I walked over to ____ and Jackson.
I gently touched her cheek. “I’m sorry that I forgot about you. If only I was able to keep my memories then maybe you would’ve came to me instead.” I said and then made my way down to the door and left them be.
*Jackson’s POV*
I woke up and found ____ still beside me when I suddenly felt something wet my shoulder.
“____?” I called her name gently. “Is she crying?” I thought as I brought my hand and touched her face.
“She is crying. Why?” I thought. I as I wiped away her tears.
“Don’t leave me.” She said.
“____. What’s wrong?” I asked her. Still letting her rest on my shoulder.
She then woke up and wiped away her tears. “Oh, Jackson.” She said.
“Why were you crying?” I asked her after she finished wiping her tears.
“I don’t know.” She said as tears continuously streamed down her face. I then hugged her and comforted her.
“It’s okay don’t cry.”
After a couple of minutes of her crying she then came to a stop.
“Did you dream of something sad?” I asked her. She shook her head.
“I wasn’t dreaming.” She said.
“Well it’s okay now, you stopped crying already.” I said and released her from my hug.
“Do you want ice cream so you’ll feel better?” I asked her.
“Yeah.” She said.
“Okay, later when we finish our classes meet me in the piano room. I know both Jung Hee and Eun Ji will be looking for me so I we meet there then they wouldn’t be able to find me.” I said to her.
“You’re hiding from them?”
“Yes, because they can do their own things. I don’t belong to ten, but I belong to you.” I said which made her laugh.
“Since when were you mine?” She asked me.
“Since we first met.”
“Jackson…what if I didn’t lose my memories? What if I remember everything clearly and stilled liked Mark, when we meet how would things be?”
“If you still remembered Mark, you would’ve met me. You’d probably focus too much on Mark that you’ll barely talk to me and for our feelings, it would probably be one-sided, I’ll be the only one liking you, you wouldn’t return those feelings. Anyways we should head back to our class. we’ve been out for awhile now.
“They probably already ended.” ____ said.
“That’s true.” I said and I looked at my watch. “Yeap, five more minutes before school ends.
We both laughed and after five minutes we just headed down the stairs and went to the nearest ice cream shop.
“____. Jackson.” Our names were called as we turned and found Mark there.
“What is it that you want?”
“____, how come you never see me?”
“I don’t know why I can’t see you unless you call me out.” I said and continued eating my ice cream.
“I guess Mark’s not the one who was able to help her, if not him then who was it?” I thought.
“Ka Yee.” ____ suddenly called out my name.
“Huh?” I looked at her.
“Your ice cream is melting.” She said and laughed. I looked at her and laughed then I realized that Mark was no longer here.
“What happened to Mark?” I asked her.
“He left.”
“Oh.”
“What are you thinking about so much you didn’t hear me call you?”
“Nothing, I was just spaced out randomly.” I said and continued to eat my ice cream.
“If it wasn’t Mark then who was it?” I thought while looking at her as she enjoys her ice cream.
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Okay I think this chapter might have been boring. I totally forgot what I wrote and I became clueless half way but I tried to make sense, so if you’re confused or what so ever ask me so I can explain.
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