***

THIS is not easy.

This IS not easy.

 This is NOT easy.

This is not EASY.

          It seems easy when actually it is not at all. He wondered how people has the courage to jump from a high place. Especially, this one. It must be hard for them, facing all the fear alone, with nobody beside them to hold onto their cold trembling hands.

          Some people may choose a very high place to calm their messed up mind; a hill maybe. How they manage to place themselves in such situation, he would always wondering about that. They said the warm breeze that caressed their skin will help them to calm their twirling mind but why he didn’t feel any of it now? Only the fear that accompanied him now.

          He felt like his heart will give up and jump out from his ribcages anytime soon. Standing at the edge like this didn’t help at all. It’s really scary. He tries hard not to look down but it is impossible. There’s nowhere to look except at the water below. A small yelp escaped his lips when arms sneaked around his waist.

          “ this Myung, you scared the out of me!” Sungyeol squeezed his eyes shut. His heart is beating crazily and he felt faint already. The sound of water from below didn’t help him calming down  at all. Slowly he felt Myungsoo turned his body so that they are face to face.

          “Open your eyes, Yeol.” There is no water anymore in his peripheral of sight. The first thing he saw is Myungsoo’s handsome face. Myungsoo is smiling warmly at him, showing his cute little dimples. “Don’t be scared, Yeol.”

          He launched himself into Myungsoo’s arms, hugging the latter as tight as he can. The fear is eating him slowly from inside and he can’t do anything to block it. He hated how coward he is. They had promised to do this together. No matter what, they’ll be together. He felt how Myungsoo’s arms s around his waist and he tightened his hold. The warm breeze embraced both of them tightly and it is calming him down a little bit.

They’re so ed up. Maybe not Myungsoo, only him. Many possibilities came into his messed up mind.

“But I’m scared Myung.. What if I died?”

“Then I’ll go after you.”

           Myungsoo joined their forehead together, giving him an eskimo kiss before kissing his lips ever so softly. Sungyeol gazed into his boyfriend eyes befo