Would anyone like to hit me? 
With a rock? 
Anyone? 
ANYONE?!
... It doesn't have to be a large rock, a small pebble will do.

Anything to get me away from whatever it is that's happening in my living room right now. 

Tonight, I've learned quite a few new things.

The first being my aunt and uncle should really not have supplied the wine and champagne for tonight's festivities.

Even though we're all underage, there wasn't much thought put into reaching out for a glass of champagne when my uncle raised his for a toast. I mean, it's not like I haven't had wine before. Any time SM has had an event or dinner, it's no oddity to see the other idols who are also not of age yet, raise their glass before taking a sip. 

However, I think there's a line thats been crossed tonight. What I'm having to endure right now is NOT normal behavior, that much I know.

Aside from seeing some of the derps in a new light, the main and most important lesson I've learned tonight is that there are about five different types of drunks. 

To begin, we've got the loud drunks.
And by loud, I mean is that a cat dying or is that Chen and Baekhyun singing Come and Get It by Selena Gomez.

I don't even know how I managed to recognize the song, they're singing it with no music and I'm pretty sure Baekhyun's hit an all time record with his eyeliner... That smokey black color is up to his eyebrows man. 

Next, we've got the happy drunks. 
I don't think I even need to point out Chanyeol... But, there he goes. And yes, he IS wearing a skirt which I'm sure is Chen and Luhan's doing, but he doesn't seem to mind considering he's laughing... And skipping.
Somehow, Chen and Luhan convinced the happy giant that he was actually a girl for all of his life, so now he won't answer to anyone unless he's called CHANYELLA.   

Moving on, we've got the angry drunks. 
He thinks you can't see him, but that's Tao over there in that dark corner of my uncle's study. Yeah, that's him hiding behind that plant. And no, I don't think he's aware that the plant only covers his feet. 
What is he doing, you may ask? 
Well, I'm not exactly sure but I'm going to take a guess and say that he's silently waiting for someone to pass by his way. 
I saw him go off into that corner with a broomstick earlier, and he was muttering something about "wushu" and "you will all die today." 
It wasn't long before Kyungsoo ended up joining him, and now every time I look over their way, I can see them conspiring and laughing maniacally. 
So, there's that. 

We've got the sleepy drunks. 
... 
Lay. 

Lastly, we've got the "Wow is that me because I am so beautiful and wow again, I am so talented and oh my god out of my way peasants!" drunks. 

Example A: Sehun taking about a million drunk selcas of himself only to send them to all of us in a group text. It wouldn't be so bad if he at least changed his facial expressions from that blank, lost look... And if he stopped captioning each photo with "You're welcome." 
Also, I'm pretty sure I was the only one who received the photo of his bare chest with "This is all yours." written all over it in chocolate fudge. 
It's now my wallpaper. 

Example B: Kris going around the room to announce that everything from the snacks on the various tables to Tao, is NOT HIS STYLE. I think Suho tried giving him some water earlier but that didn't end well when Kris literally freaked out.  
Apparently, water is not his style. 

Annnnnnd then we have Example C, or Kai, currently in a high stakes dance off with a couch pillow that he swears is Lay. 
He keeps nudging the pillow and yelling, "Bring it, Yixing! Can't take the heat?! I'm Kiiiiiim Jongin!" 
What happens after is what I can only describe as a mating dance? At least that's what it looks like as he prances wildly around the pillow/fake Lay. 

The rest fall under some miscellaneous category of "normal" drunks, as in they either stay quiet or show small signs from all five different categories. 

For example, Luhan and Xiumin are currently head to head in competition. 

Arm wrestling? Nah. 
Food eating competition? Nah. 
Sparring? Nah. 
THUMB WARS. Because apparently, that's what real men do. 

Am I the only responsible one around here?

Oh no, wait. 
There's still Suho...
Oh but wait, I lost him about an hour ago when Chen and Kris convinced him to take JUST ONE DRINK and now he's going around calling himself S-Money. 
I'd say he's loooong gone now considering that he's currently standing over my aunt's sunflower plant and chucking it with the dollar bills that he's fishing out of his wallet. 

Now, at this point - you may ask yourself: what in the actual shrimp nation is happening? 

I don't know either el oh el

Well, this is a celebration. 

I'll admit that I'm slightly tipsy, but I'm nowhere near as intoxicated as the rest of the derps. 

Minah is watching them with the same look of disgust and horror as we both shake our heads and click our tongues. 

What started out as a normal party quickly turned into the rowdiest derpfest I have ever had the unfortunate luck of witnessing. 

I blame my aunt. 
She's the one who planned this whole thing and where is that woman now? 

I haven't seen her or my uncle in over an hour, and the last time I did see them, my uncle was chuckling and saying something about how "the boys deserved this break to cut loose."

All I know is, that I'm going to cut everyone in this room. 

"I have never..." Minah paused to step out of the way as Chanyeol suddenly darted past us - skirt flying and all. "... Seen them like THIS." 

Instead of responding, I silently nodded in agreement, wincing slightly as the room echoed from the loud sounds emanating from Chen and Baekhyun, who have now moved on to sing Taylor Swift. "I don't know about youuuu~ but I'm feeling twenty-twooooo!"

"H-Hina! M-m-mana!" 

We both turned to see Xiumin and Luhan waving us over, their hands beckoning clumsily as the two wore dizzy grins. 

Hina?... Mana? 

No. 

Minah and I don't even have to even look at each other to know that their calls will go ignored. 

A sudden piercing shriek sounds from the corner of the room and I already know that Tao and Kyungsoo have found their first target before I turned to look their way. 

Chanyeol Chanyella is on the ground, his face contorted into a wrinkle of pain as he wails loudly on the floor. 
He's clutching his ankle, and since he's wearing a skirt, I will NOT be going over there to check if he's alright. 
I don't want to see anything I do want to see.

I mean I don't want to see... I mean whut. 

Tao and Kyungsoo share a mischievous cackle before thumping the broomstick on Chanyeol's head once more before retreating back into their corner. 

I'm not even ashamed to admit that if I were as far gone as the rest of the derps, I'd probably fit into the category of angry drunks and be right beside Kyungsoo and Tao, attacking any who trespass our corner kingdom.

I shall rule them all. Pokemon!

Though all of the derps are making their own fair amounts of noise, Chen and Baekhyun are definitely the loudest and their sudden lack of "singing" is enough for the rest of the room to glance up in confusion. 

Apparently they've hit their limit, they're too drunk to even continue singing... Or whatever it is they were doing with their voices. 
Both are now giggling, still standing on my aunt's coffee table and poking the other on the nose before attempting to help each other up. 

Neither Minah or I move to help them, though I watch the stumbling pair carefully so that they don't accidentally knock over one of my aunt's vases. Minah is too busy shaking her head at Xiumin - who is now in a TOE war with Luhan, the two of them are literally waggling their feet at each other. 

Even Lay is now awake as he stumbles up from his place on the couch to find himself a bottle of water.
 
His path is cut short by Kai, who suddenly stops his dance and confusedly darts his eyes from the pillow he has propped up against his arm, to the real Lay now rubbing his eyes in front of him. 
I don't even try to hide my laughter as I watch Kai's eyes grow wide with fear, he quickly pushes the pillow away and backs away with quick head shakes. 

"Kai?" Lay yawns, stepping forward while sleepily blinking his eyes. "What's wrong?" 

We only hear "robot Lay" and "two Yixings!" before Kai wildly jumps back before scrambling up to run away in fear. 

I guess that in order for you to understand the shrimp-nanigans that's happening here, I need to back track to a couple of days ago. 

If you asked me what it had been like to be pushed up on that stage, all I remember is the bright flash, it was impossible for me to even see into the audience - though the noise was definitely there. 

Oh my shrimp, the SCREAMS. 

I can't even tell you what prompted me to begin to play, but once I began, it was easy to be lost in the music rather than panicking about the fact that I was on stage. I hadn't even realized the song was over until Kyungsoo's hands had lightly tapped my shoulders. 

Looking back on the recent events from the past few days, I can honestly say that being on stage wasn't the worst thing to happen. 

It was everything that came after. 

Take, for example - today. 

Forget the swarms of fans that had camped out of the SM building, demanding to know why I had been on stage with their precious Exo members. 

BECAUSE THEY IS MINE THATS WHY

Forget the reporters and the numerous online articles that had practically claimed that this was the confirmation the public needed, and that I was indeed, a rookie training to debut within SM. 

Forget even my parents, who had called right away after hearing from one of their friends that I was on TV. Though I hadn't technically done anything wrong, my recent decision to stay in Korea wasn't necessairly a happy one. 

Deciding not to continue wallowing in my frustrations, I sighed, raising my eyes to gaze upon the ONE thing I had been avoiding all evening. 

In the midst of all the various colorful decorations, a large banner hung from the ceiling - it was hard not to miss, which was why it had been so difficult to try and ignore. 

The banner itself was colored in a light blue, but the letters that ran across it were anything but subtle. 

"WELCOME TO SM, HANA!!!!!" 

...

A sudden arm slung over my shoulders, prompting me to snap out of my annoyance as I glanced up to meet Sehun's eyes. 

His lids are drooping, his breaths shallow. 
"Did you get my picture?" 

Yes I got all 671 of them. Thanks for that. 

Instead of waiting for me to respond, derphun suddenly lifts up his shirt and smiles proudly as my eyes widen at the sight of his chest. 

The chocolate writing has now rubbed off and what's left looks like... 

"EWWWWW!" 

Baekhyun staggers over, his hand over his mouth before he lets out a disgusted noise. 

"Ew!" He squeals again, now pointing to gesture towards Sehun's chest. "Sehun, did you poop yourself?!" 

...

"Did I?!" Sehun peers down towards the chocolate mess. "OH MY GOSH! I think I did!" 

...

My head hurts. 
This isn't a headache, though. 
This is a migraine. 

➳Author's Note:
If you are confused, don't worry! At first, I was thinking of just releasing this part as a prologue but it sort of became longer and longer and yeah, this happened. 

I will explain what's going on more in the next coming chapters :) 

****** This sequel will be about Sehun and Hana, not Kyungsoo. ******

I'm soo sorry this took so long to update, I'm sure most of you know it's a busy time for both readers & writers since there's schoooool and finals. 

On the bright side, now it's summer. And mama izzzz back y'all. Did you guise miss meh because I missed all of you sweets! ♥

Added: Guys just as a reminder, as much as I think the new story chat feature is cool, it only shows me that last TEN messages :( if I'm not online, it's likely I won't be able to see what's written.

Lastly, I have to just say that there will be no third installment to this hot mess, so I'm going to really have a lot of fun and go alllll out into making this the most cracked out comedy I can ^^
Hope I can get a few of you laughing along with me ♥

You know what to do. 
Group freaking hug. 

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥