"Doctor!" One of the nurses called in panic as I looked up from you. "The baby’s heart rate is dropping." The doctor’s eyes looked up and squinted to see the screen.

"W-What does that mean?" You questioned through your labored breath once the contraction was over.

"The baby isn’t handling this stress of the contractions very well." One of the nurses told you while they looked at your vitals and the babies. Your eyes turned to me and I just saw fear and concern filling your eyes.

"It’s going to be okay, the baby will make it." I tried to keep you positive but negative thoughts swirled around in my head. Wondering what would happen to the baby if it didn’t make it, yet I pushed them back and I knew that our baby and you were a fighter and both of you would make it.

"Sir, can I talk to you for a second outside?" The doctor asked me and I nodded, I leaned down and kissed your forehead gently before giving your hand to a nurse and followed the doctor outside.

Once the door closed behind us, he pulled his mask off and ringed it in his hands.

"I am just going to be honest with you." The doctor avoided my eyes while I tried to read his face for answers. "Your wife and baby aren’t doing very good. The baby’s heart rate has dropped, then your wife has a fever and her body isn’t handling the stress well either."

"What do we do?" I asked knowing that this wasn’t going how it was supposed to.

"We have to take them into surgery for any chance to save your wife and/ or child." The doctor proposed.

"Please do all that you can." I begged, looking into his eyes I saw fear and doubt behind them and I didn’t know why. He nodded his head and his fingers played with his mask while I saw him trying to form words.

"If we can only save one, which one would you like to save?" The doctor questioned looking into my eyes seriously. My heart dropped at the question and this time I was the one to look away. "This is only the worse case scenario." The doctor added.

"My wife please, just try and save them both." I pleaded with tears b my eyes.

"Be strong for her, she needs you." The doctor patted my shoulder, I held back my tears and followed him back into the room.

"Prep her for surgery." The doctor ordered, the nurses nodded and started moving around you. You looked over at me, tears already b your eyes from the pain.

"S-Surgery?" You questioned when I took your hand back into mine.

"They have to, it is the only way to save you and the baby." I explained while rubbing my thumb over the knuckles of your fingers. Nodding your head, I pushed some hair out of your face then brought my hand down to your stomach and rubbed your ballooned belly, for I thought would be for the last time.

"All ready doctor." The nurses called and stood awaiting orders.

"Very good, I’ll meet you down there." The doctor said before he left the room going to change into his surgical gown.

Pulling up the bumpers on the bed, I continued to hold you hand while they wheeled you out of your room and down the hall, with machines following you and beeping, the doors opened for the operating rooms. I continued to walk through with you but a male nurse held me back.

"Sorry but it is too dangerous for you to be in there, you will have to wait out here." The male nurse held me back. I nodded and looked down at you. The nurses stopped pushing and stepped away from the gurney to give me and you a little moment together.

I leaned over you and gently your cheek with my fingers, I looked into your eyes that were slightly relieved but still had a lot of worry behind them.

"Everything is going to be okay, love. The baby and you are fighters, you both will come out of this, okay?" My voice started to become soft as my emotions started to come to the surface.

"I love you, Hoya." You whispered and placed your hand on top of mine, I leaned over and kissed your forehead then your hand gently wrapped around my neck and pulled me into your lips.

My lips lovingly moved over yours, giving you all of my love in that single moment, you held onto my lips not wanting to let go. After a short but meaningful kiss. I pulled away and looked into your eyes.

"I love you too, baby girl." I smiled, using your nickname that you loved. "I’ll see you after okay, _______." With a nod from you, I kissed your lips once more before the nurses started moving you. I still held onto your hand until I couldn’t, your fingers slipped through mine and the white doors closed in front of me.

Tears quickly rushed to my eyes, heading down the hall a little there was a small window where the husbands could see the wives’ surgery. I stood there and watched you while the doctor stepped behind the blue green sheet. I watched the monitors to see you and the baby struggling. Glancing at the doctors and nurses, the nurses started to rush around and they laid you down on the table, I saw that your heartbeat was lost, you were flat lined. I pressed my hands against the window, ready to break in there at a moment’s notice.

The doctor started to do CPR on you upon my request to save you instead of the baby. The doctor looked up at the window and tried to revive you, but after several minutes of not getting your heart started up, and the electric shock panels didn’t work. He looked over at me and shook his head.

I leaned against the window and let the tears run from my eyes. Kicking the wall, I focused more on the pain in my food rather than the pain of loosing the two most important things to me. The doctor came out a few minutes later.

"I am sorry to report, but we couldn’t save your wife or your baby. I am so sorry." The doctor’s words began to slow as I felt the world around me crumble. Leaning against the wall, I slid down to the polished floor and just screamed at the top of my lungs your name.

—

I pushed myself to sit upright in my bed, my hair stuck to my sweat soaked body, my chest sharply heaved trying to catch my breath. Bringing my hand up to my face, I ran it through my hair then I remember the dream, it felt so real and so lifelike, the only way to know that it was a dream was to see you sleeping next to me.

Turning on my side lamp, I looked over to your side of the bed but saw that you weren’t there. Panicking, I threw the covers off of me and stood on the floor, running over to the bathroom, I looked inside, turning on the light, but when you weren’t there. I was almost convinced that the dream was real.

”_________! ________!” I yelled waiting for a response but one never came so I through the apartment and checked the new nursery and the guest bedroom to see if you were in there, but you weren’t anywhere to be found.

”_______!” I yelled once more.

"Hoya?" I heard your voice faintly.

”_______!” I called again.

"Hoya, where are you?" You called but I ran into the living room and saw you in the kitchen sitting on one of the bar stools. I quickly ran over to you while you slid down from the chair, holding your round stomach.

"Baby!" I wrapped you in a tight hug and nuzzled my face into your shoulder.

"What’s wrong?" You asked wrapping your arms around me while silent tears ran down my face.

"It was a dream." I choked out against your shoulder, your warm arms wrapped around my shoulders as you began to rock me gently.

"A bad dream?" You whispered while your fingers ran soothingly through my hair while I nodded into your shoulder. "What was it about?"

"Y-You and you were having the baby but there were complications so they had to take you into surgery but both of you died, then when I didn’t see you beside me I thought that you were really gone and it scared me." I said through my tears and voice cracks. Silence wrapped around us while I still held onto you tightly.

"Why were you out here anyways?" I questioned you pulling away from the hug.

"The baby was hungry, it wouldn’t stop kicking." You giggled, rubbing your large stomach lovingly. I looked at you and saw you safe and happy and then I looked at your stomach and placed my hand on your stomach too. I broke into a smile when I felt the baby kick and move inside of you.

"Stop moving, mommy needs her sleep and daddy needs mommy so daddy won’t get scared." I whispered before kissing your stomach then kissing your lips.

"Let’s get you two to bed." I wrapped my arm around your back and helped guide you back to the bedroom, turning off lights along the way, I helped you into your side of the bed. Walking over to my side, I slid under the covers and wrapped my arms around you, pulling my chest against your back.

"Tell me if you need something, I don’t want to let you go for a while." I gently brushed your hair behind your ear and you turned over to face me.

"Okay, sorry I wasn’t in bed." You yawned and closed your eyes.

"I’m just glad that you are safe and sound." I smiled while my fingers played with the ends of your hair then I looked down at your belly, "You too, baby." I moved against you and felt the baby kick against my stomach.

Moving my hand over your stomach, I drew little hearts and starts for the little baby boy or girl that we would be having. While my eyes stayed on your beautiful sleeping face.

Your lips were gently parted while your eye lids were gently relaxed over your eyes. My necklace hung around your neck and I didn’t want to take my eyes off of you for the rest of the night. The way that your eyelashes fanned from your eyes and your cheeks were gently blushing, I couldn’t help but smile and lean in for a kiss on your forehead.

"I’m going to take more days off to be with you and the baby." I whispered softly, before pulling you closer to me, I eventually fell asleep with you tightly wrapped in my arms.