this is a shytt ton of dialog btw.. so get ready.

Annoyed. "Like you really don't know. Like you don't know how much he loves you and is hurt that you are off with your other friends all the time and not paying him any mind."

"That's a load of bull," he grits his teeth. "But I guess it wouldn't be surprising for you to believe in everything he says. You've always been his favorite hyung after all."

The older males grip loosen just a little. "What are you trying to say?"

"What I'm trying to say is, you honestly don't have a clue what's really going on, who he really loves and who he really cherishes. The person he loves and cherishes is you hyung."

In disbelief. "What? That's not possible."

He scoffs. "then tell me hyung, have you ever noticed how he looks at you and smiles at you throughout these years? How whenever it is you, he acts like a kid and loves to be spoiled? He even seems to glow when he's with you, or whenever you are around. Normally he hates to get close to people and doesn't like to be touched, but with you, he get's more touchy-feely."

"Isn't it normal? We've known each other since we were in diapers. Don't tell me it's because of these things. I don't want to hear bout useless things like these. You know me and him are close. So, what do you actually mean?"

"What I mean is, he smiles this very fond smile that is exclusively towards you. Throughout all these years that I've known him, he has never directed that to me. I've known you guys since middle school hyung, and I've never seen it. Not even when we started going out till now. You know why? He only loves you hyung. He's never loved me." He rants.

"That's not true, he loves you very much. He's always came to be and told me that himself and he has always cried over the lack of affection, attention and neglect you have towards him."

"Don't you know why he's been coming to you more often? Do you really not know? Can you really not see it hyung? How long have you broken up with your boyfriend for? How long has he been going to you and complaining? Think about it. Like I said, it's easier for you to believe him than it is to believe me. What I'm saying is true though, hyung. If you think about it hard enough, you'll see that he always has that smile whenever he's with you. He's not like that to the rest of us. Not even me, his boyfriend."

There is no response from the older male, so he continues.

Tears slowly make its way down his cheeks. "You might not have known this but let me tell you something. I've been chasing him for the last decade trying to get a glimpse of that smile directed towards me. That same special smile that has his eyes twinkling with affection. Sadly, it never appeared once for me. I tried comforting him every time he went through the heartbreak of seeing you with someone else. I tried asking him out countless of times, getting rejected and laughing it off. I tried buying his favorite foods, drinks and mangas. I tried making him fall in love with me ever since he unwillingly agreed to go out with me because he wanted to distract himself when you got with your most current boyfriend a year ago. Have you noticed that we went out not shortly after you guys started dating? It wasn't by coincidence. It was me who asked him out countless of times for so long, still afraid of getting rejected, but I still tried. I was most surprised when he finally agreed, albeit reluctantly. You know why he finally agreed to go out with me? It was because the relationship with you and your boyfriend lasted longer than he thought and he needed something else to occupy his mind. I willingly let myself be his escape."

Eyes wide, the other tries to speak but nothing comes out of his mouth. Still trying to process everything that he just heard coming out of the younger males mouth.

Shaking his head, he continues. "Throughout that time, I've tried so many things hyung, so many things. Honestly, I'm tired of everything. I'm sick and tired of playing this game of cat and mouse with him. I'm tired of having to fight for his attention whenever you are around. I'm tired of fighting a losing battle. I'm tired of having to hold him close to me but all it does is suffocate him being with me. I'm tired of trying to gain his love. I'm tired hyung. I really am." 

"I don't.. I don't understand Yixing. You're lying to me aren't you? To make it seem like it's my fault he's breaking apart when it's you. You're the person that he has been complaining about. You're the person that made him break down in front of me. He who normally doesn't show his weakness. Showed it in front of me."

Shaking his head again. "That's where you're wrong hyung. He's always happy when talking about you. He's always happy whenever he is able to see you, talk to you, to be close to you. Anything that relates to you makes him happy. I can't give him the happiness he wants because I'm not the person he wants. I'm not the person he wants to hold. I'm not the person that has his heart. You're the person that always had his heart without realizing it. You're the person who's been slowly breaking his heart. You're the person that he'd tell his secrets to. You're the person to hold his heart. I'm sure he broke down in front of you because he wanted comfort from you. He needed your attention."

"I don't believe you. Stop telling me all these lies just because you decided to leave him alone, that you picked your friends over your own boyfriend."

He forces a laugh. "You've got to be kidding me. When have I ever, ever, chosen my friends over him? Not when we were normal friends and definitely​ not when we started going out. I dedicated my whole time to him." He let's out a sigh. "Hyung, I've always thought you were smart but I guess I was wrong. You're so naive hyung but I get it. He's your favorite dongseng and you'll do anything to protect him. You've always been close friends, even without me around. But hyung, what he's been telling you have been lies. The person leaving him isn't me. It's you. You left him the moment you got yourself a boyfriend. The moment you began to neglect him. The moment you had someone else that took your attention away."

"That's not-"

"True? It's true hyung. And I'm tired. I'm really tired. I'm tired of trying to catch him when he was never within my range. I'm tired of chasing after something I knew I couldn't have from the beginning. I'm tired of wasting another second, another minute, another hour, another year, another decade. Desperately trying to get his attention, desperately trying to get his time and even more desperately to gain his love. It hurts you know? It hurts trying to keep something knowing that all you're doing is suffocating it. In order to gain his attention and his heart, that's exactly what I've been doing. Whenever I try to take his attention away from you. Whenever I try to erase the presence you created beside him. All I feel is that I've been suffocating him with my unwanted presence. I've been suffocating him by tying him down to me."

"But that's-"

"Listen hyung. I know he's your favorite dongseng and that you'd do anything to protect him from being hurt. But let me ask you, how will you protect his heart? His heart that has been slowly ripping, cracking, shattering to pieces unknowingly by you for the longest time. How will you be able to heal and mend his heart when all you've ever wanted to do was to protect him, to shelter him, to keep him safe. Knowing that the reason behind his pain and heartache, is you."

"I.. I don't. I don't know how I'm supposed to do that. What I know is, he has you. He has you to mend his broken heart. He has you by his side to patiently cure him of his heartache. I can't take on the role to heal or mend his heart when all I can see in him is a little brother."

"Don't you think you are being selfish hyung? For you to tell me that my presence will help mend his heart would be a lie. If that was the case, I would have been able to mend his broken heart a long time ago. Look at how messed up everything is. Look at how broken I have become trying to hold on to something that has never been mine. Look at how our relationships have changed."

Showing a sad smile. "I don't know, Yixing. I really don't know."

Letting out a sigh. "Look, just talk to him. You are the only one he will talk to. You're the only one he will listen to. Ask him what is really going on. Hear what he has to say. Tell him thank you, for accepting the proposal of going out with me and tell him, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for suffocating him for the duration of the time we've been together. Also, tell him this. Tell him, I'm letting him go. Tell him, he's free and doesn't need to pretend to love me anymore. Tell him, he doesn't need to force himself anymore. Tell him, I knew from the beginning that his heart was never once mine. And that I'm sorry his heart was never on the path to be shaken by me."

"What do you think you are-"

He shakes his head and silences the other with his finger, fresh tears flowing down his cheeks. "Just tell him for me hyung, okay? But most of all, tell him that you'll try and love him as more than just a friend. More than a little brother. Tell him, you'll try. For me."

"You know I can't do that. Don't you love him? Are you telling me that you'll be able to let him go? Just like that?"

He lets out a weak chuckle. "Hyung, have you not been listening to anything I've said to you? It's okay though and to answer your question, yes. I do love him. I've loved him from the beginning. Honestly, I think I'll continue to love him for the longest time. It's not easy letting him go, but it's easier to see him breathe after being suffocated for so long with someone he never loved. Someone who was never able to distract his wounded heart. Even so, I've loved him for the longest time knowing all this but it's time. It's time to let go, it's time to move on. I don't want to waste our time anymore, hyung. I don't want the both of us to be hurting. I don't want the both of us to suffocate. I don't want the both of us to live in a world of lies, so I'm letting him go."

"No, Yixing. I won't allow you to do that. I will talk to him and ask him for his side of the story but I will not let you give up like this."

"I can't hyung. I can't do this anymore. I really can't. I'm tired. I'll talk to you later hyung, bye." He pushes himself away from the wall and away from the older male and heads inside his apartment complex.

uhmmm.. yeah.. don't kill me x.x
im marking this as a one shot/complete
there might be a sequel later i guess -shrugs-
the sequel have the names to clear things up
like who the 'hyung' is in here nd who xings 'bf' is :P

bro, pirateninja209 told you this lawl

wordcount: 1979~