On the Days that I Missed You

 

  The cold breeze of autumn was tickling my skin as I was writing a letter, a letter to my beloved Jessica. Nevertheless, I knew myself I would not send that letter. Why did I break up with her in the first place? Now my heart is aching and she would not know that.

 

  I looked outside the window and watched as the red leaves were falling from the trees. I remember the day we spent together during the autumn. Memories that I loved so much… My Ice Princess, Jessica, I miss you so much.

 

  My thoughts were interrupted by a few thuds on the door. And before I knew it Yesung and Eunhyuk hyung had entered my room. I smiled at them.

 

  “Hae… it’s time for dinner,” the both of them said to me, trying to drag me outside.

 

  “Nyeeeh… I’ll go out in five minutes,” I said and they all walked out of my room. I put down my pen and paper on my desk and sat down for a bit. I saw a blank piece of canvas and took it out.

 

  I remember those days when I would ask Jessica to stay still for a few hours just so I could capture each and every mesmerizing detail on her flawless face.

 

--Flashback--

 

  “Donghae oppa, are you done with that portrait of yours already? It’s been like two hours you know…” Jessica said without looking at me.

 

  “Just a little bit…” I mumbled. I sharpened my pencil a little bit and added some on my drawing. A bright smile formed on my lips and I showed her the portrait. “All done, princess!”

 

  Her eyes beamed with happiness and excitement. “Oppa, it’s so pretty~” she said, which made me sit next to her and kiss her forehead.

 

  “But you’re prettier Sica-yah,” I complimented her. I could see a faint crimson shade form on her face. ‘So pretty,’ I thought.

 

  She scoffed. “You drew me. What’s the difference?”

 

  I looked to the sky and closed my eyes. “Babo…” I muttered under my breath.

 

  I felt her small, soft fingers on my face. I chuckled. She always liked to touch my face. I opened my eyes and looked at her. She smiled.

 

  “You’re prettier in person.” I said and kissed her on the lips. We parted and I smiled at her. “Do you want to keep this drawing?”

 

  She shook her head. “I already have you, I don’t need anything else.”

 

  I put the drawing aside and lied down on our picnic mat. She pinned me down, her lips just inches away from mine. Many people around us were watching. It practically looked like a PG-Rated scene.

 

  I smiled at her aggressiveness and trailed my index finger from her nose to her lips, and then closing the gap between us with a small peck on the lips.

 

  Then… some very distinct voices ruined our moment. “YAH GUYS YOU SHOULD GET A ROOM!” It was the others, as in Super Junior and SNSD.

 

  I sat up and let Jessica sleep on my lap. ‘So innocent… my angel Sica…’ I thought.

 

--End of Flashback –

 

  I let out a huge sigh as I realized I was staring blankly at the bare piece of canvas. “Jessica, I miss you…” I muttered under my breath. “I’m not over you.”

 

  I cupped my own cheeks. I could still feel her warm hands on these very cheeks…

 

  Maybe I never should have broken up with her. Aish…

 

  “LEE DONGHAE COME DOWN HERE OR ELSE!” I heard Leeteuk hyung’s stern voice from downstairs. I put the canvas on my bed and went downstairs to eat our dinner.

 

  I could see everybody else was happy with their love lives – the smiles on their faces could be evidence. I rested my chin on the table as Leeteuk hyung distributed the ramyun to all of our bowls.

 

  “So, how are you doing with your Seohyun?” Leeteuk hyung asked our evil Maknae Kyuhyun. He grinned from ear to ear. Even gamer Kyuhyun has a better love life than artist Donghae does.

 

  “Aigoo…” I mumbled before eating my bowl of ramyun. Actually, I had no appetite to eat that evening. But I didn’t know why. Maybe it was because I remembered about Jessica. Maybe it was because I was out of inspiration to draw. Who knows, because Jessica would always give me inspiration?

 

  One by one, the members left the table for the SNSD dorm and/or to their girlfriends, leaving me behind, alone with Yesung hyung. You see, he likes someone but has not confessed yet.

 

  I went upstairs to my room and looked at the blank canvas on my bed. I held it in one hand and sat down across my table.

 

  I stared at it blankly, not knowing what to draw. Without realizing, I started to it gently with a 5b pencil. I snapped back to reality when I realized what I was drawing. The light on the canvas were forming into someone’s eyes; eyes that I missed so dreadfully.

 

  “Yah.” I looked for the voice’s owner and detected Yesung hyung, standing in front of my bedroom entrance. “I see you’re drawing portraits again. It’s been so long.”

 

  I stared at him unintentionally and closed my eyes. “May I see?” he asked in a slightly lowered voice. I swallowed my own saliva and hugged the canvas. Tears started streaming down my cheeks.

 

  “Here” I said, handing him the canvas.

 

  He looked at it with a bright expression on his face. “You haven’t seen her for months but you still remember her face…” Yesung hyung said with a salutation for me. “Can you draw Yuri after you’ve finished this one?”

 

  I took in a deep breath processing his words and lied down on my bed. “Sure.”

 

  Yesung hyung sat on my chair and looked around my room. “Where do you keep your drawings?” he asked.

 

  “Next to my wardrobe, there’s a room, I keep everything in there.” I responded a little lazily, closing my eyes lightly. I miss my Jessica…

 

  A few seconds passed by without a single noise. What happened? Yesung hyung is usually very talkative. I walked towards the said room to look for him. It was a pretty big room, considering I was into drawing portraits for about four years now.

 

  “Hyung…?” I called for him but I stopped in front of a big picture hanging on the wall. I remember drawing that one. It was Jessica and I, our selca. I cannot believe I still kept it. On the bottom right corner, Jessica had signed it.

 

‘Donghae oppa, this picture is so big! Keep on drawing~ your drawings are jjang!

-       Your Ice Princess Jessica’

  My Ice Princess Jessica… Her voice always echoes in my mind. I snapped back to reality when Yesung hyung patted my shoulder, handing me an old portrait. “You remember this?” he asked.

 

  I nodded my head. Tears streamed down my cheeks. Jessica… Why did I break up with you?

 

  “Jessica… I love you…” I mumbled. I positioned my hand on my chest to feel my heartbeat. Wait, where is it? Ah, there it is…

 

  I hung the portrait I was holding beside the big one.

 

‘Donghae + Jessica = HaeSica Forever~ Saranghae oppa~’

 

  I went back to my bed to sleep while Yesung hyung still stood there, in the room, probably admiring my portraits. Most of them were Jessica, and some were SNSD, Super Junior, SHINee and f(x).

 

  “Bye Hae…” He exited my room with a smile of awe on his face, probably going to Yuri’s place or something.

 

  “Ah.” He turned around and stuck his face in the entrance. “Yuri’s birthday party is next week. Can you finish it by then?”

 

  “Meh…?” I looked at him, slightly opening my sleepy eyes. “Sure… anything for you…”

 

  Finally, I dozed off after a few minutes, dreaming about my ever-beautiful Jessica Jung.

 

--The following week—

 

  Yesung hyung was ecstatic today, probably because today is Yuri’s birthday and tonight all of us are going to celebrate it.

 

  “Here,” I said as I handed a portrait of Yuri to him in the living room. He was watching surfing the internet for… how can I say this… undergarments. y hyung is y.

 

  I looked at the computer screen. “Why… are you buying… underwear? Is it for Yuri?” I asked him, patting his shoulder.

 

  “What? No…” He trailed off, but I could see the obvious blush on his cheeks. I shook my head and went to my room to get ready.

 

  “It’s so obvious…” I whispered to no one in particular.

 

  I stopped at the entrance to my room. There it was, hanging on my wall, the last drawing that I drew of Jessica. ‘Maybe I should give it to her’, I thought.

 

  I shook my head furiously. “What am I thinking…?” I mumbled and proceeded to change my outfit to a casual one for Yuri’s birthday party.

 

  I went down wearing a blue tee and a pair of acid-washed jeans. My favorite pair, to be exact; Jessica had given them to me on my birthday last year.

 

  “You look dashing.” Eunhyuk hyung commented, munching on some fried chicken. “… Yesung hyung is going to be mad…” I heard him say under his breath.

 

  I just ignored him and headed straight to Yesung hyung’s room. He was playing with his pet turtles, how cute.

 

  “Hyung,” I said, trying to get his attention. He turned his head and smiled.

 

  “Wow, my dongsaeng looks handsome~” he complimented me.

 

  “You ready yet?” I asked, ignoring his remark. He smirked at my impatience. Yesung hyung is Yesung hyung. No one can change him.

 

  He put Kkoming down and fixed his tie so it was neater. “Trying to woo Yuri, eh?” Now it was my turn to smirk.

 

  “This kid…” he mumbled. “Come on, let’s go, the other guys will go later.” He said.

 

  We arrived at the SNSD dorm at 7.30 sharp. Yesung hyung rang the doorbell and the door was opened by Yuri – the birthday girl herself. She was really happy to see him.

 

  They both hugged but I kept a straight face when I saw Jessica inside. If I saw her alone maybe I would run up to her and kiss her but – but she’s with some tall buff daddy. Aish…

 

  Therefore, just to ignore them, I just sat down on the sofa watching TV.

 

Jessica’s POV

 

  Aish… Taecyeon and I just went on a friendly date last week in Japan and he is already this clingy? I knew I should have listened to Yuri and stay at our hotel. This is such a nuisance…

 

--Flashback--

 

  “Jessica-sshi, would you like to get some coffee tonight?” Taecyeon asked me; I was having fun with my best friend Yuri at an amusement park.

 

  I turned to her. She shook her head, signaling that I should not come. But me, being the stubborn and stupid Jessica I was, agreed to the offer. And since then he would call and/or text me for reasons I don’t even want to bring up.

 

--End of Flashback--

 

 

  After Donghae oppa broke up with me I had a hard time adjusting to my life, but thanks to my eight sisters, I learnt to hide all my pain. Not that I already moved on from Donghae oppa, I just learned how to mask everything. Only Yuri knows all my deepest, darkest secrets.

 

  Bored seeing Taecyeon (not being rude though) I just left him and sat down on the couch in our living room. I knew someone was beside me, I just didn’t care. I flipped my phone and – get this – browsed Yuri’s blog out of boredom.

 

  Anon: What do you think of Jessica?

 

  Yuri_Kwon: Sica is like my soul mate. But ha-ha, she already found someone else T^T So I should find someone too… kekeke Sica’s boy, you’d better take care of her or I’ll make your life miserable~ I love my pretty best friend Sica~ ^^

 

  I smiled and scrolled down a little bit; I knew I had commented on that particular post. I just kept searching for it.

 

  And there it was, my comment.

 

  Sergeant_Sica: Yah, Kwon Yuri~ I love you too~ Always remember that… kekeke don’t worry Yuri-yah you’ll find a guy that’ll love you~ ^^

 

  My grin got wider and I giggled a bit. Then, without realizing, I leaned my head on the shoulder of the person beside me. Those broad shoulders. I knew those shoulders.

 

  Then I realized I was leaning on Donghae oppa’s shoulder! I missed him so dreadfully. I didn’t want to move. To my pleasant surprise, he didn’t move either. Donghae oppa was still Donghae oppa. The one who was cheesy, romantic and loving.

 

  My blissful moment was ruined by a fake cough from guess who – Taecyeon. One more time ruining my life I swear to God someone is going to the emergency room.

 

  I glared at him. “Jessica-sshi, you’re my date, why are you with him?” he asked coldly.

 

  Ok. Taecyeon. I still love him. Don’t you understand that?

 

  However, I couldn’t speak up. At first, we dated just as friends, but when Mr. Lee Sooman found out, he made a deal with JYP to make us the “rumored couple” so that the sales would go up. Aish…

 

  I sighed and excused myself to the toilet. But truthfully I was going to my room. If I cannot be with Donghae oppa, I might as well just go to sleep.

 

  I slammed my body onto my mattress. Thank god, my mattress was soft, or else I might have broken my back.

 

  I stared at the ceiling, not being able to fall asleep, which was weird. I usually fall asleep in a few minutes. I realized my mind was drifting towards Donghae oppa again. As if that wasn’t enough, I had to just remember our first date.

 

--Flashback--

 

  “Sica-yah,” he said my name gently when I spaced out, yet again. I felt guilty. What kind of girlfriend am I?

 

  I rested my head on Donghae oppa’s shoulder. Sitting next to your date in dinners, really does have advantages.

 

  He held my hand tightly. “Even though this is our first date, I don’t feel like letting you go,” he said in his oh-so-cheesy ways. But that was one of the things that had charmed me.

 

  I lightly closed my eyes and sighed heavily. “The feeling is mutual.” I muttered.

 

-- End of Flashback--

 

  I heard a knock on my door and I saw Tiffany enter my room, her arm linked with Siwon oppa’s. “Yah, your seobang Yuri is looking for you.”

 

  “Hmmm,” I responded idly and went outside with the couple. I saw Donghae oppa glancing at me with a relieved face for a split second but turned away when our eyes met. He still kept a cold face, I wonder why.

 

  “Jessica-sshi, I’ve been looking all over for you,” It’s that voice again. Aish… Taecyeon-sshi, when will you stop bothering me…?

 

  “Mianhae Taecyeon-sshi, but I need to look for my Yuri,” I glanced at him and went on to look for Yuri after he responded with a nod.

 

~Third person view~

 

  “Yuri-yah,” Jessica approached her supposed “Seobang”. She was with her favorite oppa, Yesung. “Tiffany said you were looking for me…?” She asked hesitantly, thinking that maybe it was Tiffany’s plan for revenge after they pranked her the week before.

 

  “SICA~~” Yuri burst out in happiness and hugged her “waifu”. “Everyone is doing a performance later, so you’d better not fall asleep.” She chuckled.

 

  Jessica looked around to look for a seat. She was quite frustrated though, everyone in the party seemed to have their own date – or at least friend to accompany them.

 

  Yuri had Yesung; Krystal had Minho; Tiffany had Siwon… everyone had someone. Then she noticed a shadowy figure leaning their back on the wall beside a tall buff daddy figure.

 

  She could have guessed the buff figure was Taecyeon but who was the one beside him? Could it be Donghae oppa? She wondered.

 

  She walked towards the figure but was interrupted by an announcement.

 

  “Thanks all for coming to my party,” Yuri said from the stage. “I really appreciate it.” She flashed a bright smile and looked at Yesung.

 

  “None of this could be done without the help of my waifu Jessica, so thank you very much, I love you Jessi~” she announced and Jessica smiled, mouthing “I love you too” to her.

 

  “So, as agreed, the Dino Brothers are going to perform tonight, let’s give a big applause to them,” Yuri gave over the stage to said people.

 

  Jessica sat down where she could see the stage clearly. The Dino Brothers – consisting of Donghae, Jonghyun and Amber – went up the stage and Donghae took over the microphone, holding onto his guitar.

 

  They do look alike, she thought. He started to strum his guitar in a perfect melody.

 

 

The day that I thought of you

(I miss you so much)

The day that I missed you

(Come back to me my girl)

I thought of you all night

I broke down, cried

Laughed, and called your name

 

The day I thought of you

(I want you back, but)

Seems like I’m going to die

(Comeback to my world)

I wrote your name on the sky

My love, this pain hurts me

Again and again

 

  Tears started to run down Donghae’s cheek as his voice cracked a bit but luckily, he was covered by his fellow Dino Brother Jonghyun. Meanwhile Amber at the back was busy beat boxing her heart out.

 

Today is a remarkable day

It was snowing

I tried to write a letter

That I can’t send to you

 

I still remember the day

That I let you go

You were speechless,

Only tears were flown

 

Love made me cry

Farewell made me hurt

That road that has our shadow…

I really don’t know

The one thing that remains

Is a deep-rooted wound

 

  Jessica felt the emotion behind Donghae’s voice. She felt the sadness behind his cold face. Well, duh. He was tearing up. Jonghyun took over the next chorus brilliantly.

Today is a remarkable day

It was snowing

I tried to write a letter

That I can’t send to you

 

I still remember the day

That I let you go

You were speechless,

Only tears were flown

 

Love made me cry

Farewell made me hurt

That road that has our shadow…

I really don’t know

The one thing that remains

Is a deep-rooted wound

  Yuri noticed her best friend getting emotional over her ex’s song and looked apologetically into her eyes. Jessica just smiled softly at her. Deep down inside, she knew that Yuri knew she was in deep pain. She focused to the stage when it was time for the next Dino “Brother” to belt out her short rap, and then both Donghae and Jonghyun took over the stage.

 

Because I can’t go back again

The distance when you’re gone

Standing without any hopes

I want you back girl in my world

 

Where are you? I miss you

Do you feel the same?

I’ll always miss you

 

Love made me cry

Farewell made me hurt

The road that has our shadow…

I really don’t know

The one thing that remains

Is a deep-rooted wound

 

The day that I thought of you

(I miss you so much)

The day that I missed you

(Come back to me my girl)

I thought of you all night

I broke down, cried

Laughed, and called your name

 

The day I thought of you

(I want you back, but)

Seems like I’m going to die

(Comeback to my world)

I wrote your name on the sky

My love, this pain hurts me

Again and again

 

  Donghae looked at Jessica with his watery eyes. She knew he was hurt, too. The only thing holding them back was Taecyeon’s presence. Should Taecyeon catch them kissing or whatever, their asses were toast. Damn this harsh reality. The Dino Brothers finished their song with Amber’s rap and a few lines from the other two performers.

 

Thinking of you, again and again

Baby girl you are the only one

Even if I die, I won’t forget you

Call, call me girl

I can’t erase you from my mind

It’s all pain

Everyday is the same as today

I can think of only you

Even when my eyes are closed

 

The day that I thought of you

(I miss you so much)

The day that I missed you

(Come back to me my girl)

I thought of you all night

I broke down, cried

Laughed, and called your name

 

The day I thought of you

(I want you back, but)

Seems like I’m going to die

(Comeback to my world)

I wrote your name on the sky

My love, this pain hurts me

Again and again

 

  “Wow~ that was… an emotional performance~” Yuri clapped her hands. She looked at a teary-eyed Jessica, looking a little lost. Yuri approached her best friend with hopes of helping her.

  “You okay?” she asked. Jessica nodded her head slowly and her best friend smiled at her. “Cheer up jagiya~ the Dino Brothers are performing another song,” she tried to coax her “waifu”.

  Jessica turned her attention to the stage as she eyed her beloved Donghae and sighed. She leaned on Yuri’s shoulder affectionately. Not to be a nuisance on someone’s birthday, she just needed some moral support.

  Yuri caressed Jessica’s hair playfully with her other hand. She knew Jessica was still in so much sorrow. “Thanks Kwon Seobang,” Jessica muttered under her breath but it was loud enough for Yuri to hear it.

  Meanwhile, at the stage, Donghae observed Jessica’s actions with Yuri. She was still the affectionate Jessica he loved. Still the sensitive Jessica he loved. Why did he break up with her…?

  Aish…

  Donghae shifted his front hair so it wasn’t covering his forehead. “Hyung, you okay?” Jonghyun asked. Donghae glanced at his dongsaeng and nodded. “Next we’re going to sing Only You,” Jonghyun announced, looking at Taecyeon. “Taecyeon-sshi, do you approve?”

 

  Taecyeon nodded his head.

 

  Donghae shifted his seat position uncomfortably and fixed his brown hair.

 

~About three weeks later~

 

  Tomorrow was Christmas Eve and both Donghae and Jessica were restless since it was a tradition for all SM Town members to sleep over every Christmas Eve.

 

  What if I see her again? What would I say? Donghae wondered. If it weren’t for Taecyeon he and Jessica would’ve been back together. Aish…

 

  Donghae looked at the partially drawn canvas that he started a few weeks back, which he didn’t have the chance to finish due to his hectic schedule.

 

  He laughed to himself before breaking down in tears. He was falling apart. He was going crazy. “Jessica…” he whispered to the cold wind blowing behind his neck. “I need you…”

 

  “Yah, Donghae’s still not moving on,” Yesung said to Eunhyuk downstairs in their living room. The former was surfing the internet looking for Christmas gifts for SME members.

 

  “Hmmm…” Eunhyuk bit his spoon, his eyes closed, worried about his band mate. “I don’t know, hyung, both of them being stubborn is one thing, but Taecyeon being in the middle of this is another.”

 

  Yesung turned to Eunhyuk with an astonished expression. Never did the former think that Eunhyuk would turn out to be a smart-.

 

  Yesung sighed. “Let’s just leave everything for the three of them to settle this thoroughly…”

 

  Eunhyuk looked above Yesung’s shoulder and asked him, “So what are you going to get everyone?”

 

  --At the SNSD Dorm—

 

  “Yuri-yaaaaah~” Jessica slapped Yuri’s back lightly. The latter looked behind her shoulder mumbling a reply.

 

  “Yes, Jagiya? Can I help you?” she asked and smiled beautifully.

 

  “Let’s go shopping… I need to buy Christmas gifts…” Jessica pouted.

 

  Yuri chuckled. “You know, you should really use your charms for boys.”

 

 

-------

 

  “Yah… did you pack everything for the sleepover?” Donghae heard Leeteuk’s voice from behind him. The former looked above his shoulder and barely mumbled a ‘yes’ and nodded.

 

------

 

  Both Donghae and Jessica didn’t sleep well that night, thinking of what might happen the following night. Both still loved each other. Both still wanted to be with each other. Both still wanted to kiss each other. What were they to do?

 

  That afternoon, everything was decided. All of them were to sleep over at SNSD’s new dorm.

 

  DING DONG~ Donghae rang their doorbell. He and Eunhyuk with Yesung and Kyuhyun were early. The others went to get stuff, movies, and whatnot.

 

  No response. DING DONG~

 

  “Yeah, I’m coming…” they heard a delicate voice from behind the door.

 

  Donghae’s eyes widened at his sight of his beloved one. Her hair was ruffled and her clothes were… as if someone just lied down on her. “Donghae oppa?!” she yelled and her eyes were widened, too. What was he, and, uhh – his band mates – doing there at 5 pm?

 

  She looked at herself, called for Yuri to greet their guests while she ran into their dorm, and went straight to the bathroom.

 

  The four men went in and sat down in their living room, all bringing their stuff. Yuri smiled enthusiastically at Yesung. “Oppa~” she said with her fail aegyo. Donghae and Eunhyuk eyed their hyung carefully while Kyuhyun was looking for Seohyun in the kitchen.

 

  Donghae scoffed when he saw Eunhyuk, too, was occupied with Hyoyeon. Lonely Donghae was really lonely. He walked to the fridge to get something to drink. Being the person who always visits his hoobaes, none of the girls stopped him from drinking a certain someone’s bottle of milk. Well, none of them noticed him anyway, so that’s why they didn’t stop him.

 

  He choked on the milk when he heard someone mumble, “Why is he drinking my milk??” He turned around to see a pouting Jessica with wet hair and pink fish pajamas; similar to his, only his was blue. Jessica froze before him. She realized, too, that they were wearing “couple” pajamas.

 

  Unfortunately for her, all of her other pajamas were at the laundry so she hadn’t any other left. Unfortunately, for him also, he didn’t bring any other so he couldn’t change.

 

  ‘Awkward…’ the both of them thought.

 

  “Is this your milk?” he asked, trying to break the silence.

 

  She pouted in a way he found really cute. “Yeah, but how could you drink it?” she yelled.

 

  ‘How could I… drink her… milk…’ that thought echoed in the back of his mind as he looked down and tried to hold back a small chuckle. (Yeah, Donghae, how could you drink her milk?)

 

  “Mi… Mianhae, Jessica-yah…” he said, finally lifting his head up and looking into her eyes. Jessica, on the other hand, felt like her head was going around, it’s been a while since Donghae was staring into her eyes like that.

 

  Donghae felt a pat on his shoulder. It was Evil Maknae Kyuhyun. He smiled ominously. “You know hyung… drinking Jessica’s milk… that’s indirect kissing.” He continued to laugh but Seohyun, who was the innocent one, just stared at her boyfriend not knowing anything.

 

  Donghae and Jessica looked away from each other. ‘Indirect kissing!’ he echoed inwardly. He glared at Kyuhyun coldly and proceeded to the living room, still holding onto the bottle of milk. “I’m taking this, thank you very much,” he mumbled as he passes by Jessica.

 

  Donghae sat facing the wall and grinning ear-to-ear at the bottle. Occasionally he chuckled like the five-year-old he was inwardly.

 

  Suddenly his phone rang.

 

  My, my, my sweet delight… Darn, he forgot to change his ringtone. It was still Jessica’s ‘Sweet Delight’. And to top it all off, the ringtone was so loud the whole dormitory was filled with it. He put the bottle down and answered his phone.

 

  “Yes, Teuk hyung, the four of us arrived already, okay, come quickly… yeah, I won’t do anything to her. I’ll take things slowly. Okay, annyeong.” He said into the phone that he pressed on his ear.

 

  “Umma got you this time,” Yesung said followed by a hearty laugh from Eunhyuk and Kyuhyun.

 

  Jessica, who was sitting on the sofa right in front of the television, smiled to herself. DING DONG~

 

  “Yuri-yaaah~ someone’s at the door~” she said, absent-mindedly browsing through the TV channels.

 

  Soon everyone arrived at the SNSD dorm – from their sunbaes TVXQ to their hoobaes f(x).

 

---------

 

  It was almost three in the morning and everyone was asleep, except for Donghae, and Jessica who was pretending to sleep, which was weird for someone who sleeps a lot. But how could they sleep when their hearts were pumping fast, both sweating profusely as though the AC system was broken.

 

  ‘This is my chance, I know she’s only acting,’ Donghae said inwardly, glancing at her at least once every minute while watching some TV. He had to be careful with the TV though, too loud and he’s dead meat.

 

  “Jessi~ca…” he mumbled, to which Jessica responded with an unintentional smirk forming on her lips.

 

  Jessica, Donghae, Seohyun, Kyuhyun, Eunhyuk, Hyoyeon, TVXQ and f(x) were in the living room while the others were doing their thing, or maybe they just wanted to be alone. At first, Yuri and Yesung were there, too, but somehow they disappeared in the middle of all that chaos.

 

  “Jessi~ca…” he mumbled again in a slightly raised voice, this time leaning into her face and breathing into her beautiful Barbie-like features. But frankly, he thought she was prettier than a Barbie doll.

 

  Jessica tried really hard to hold back her laughter, obviously Donghae still knew her. Even after all those months of not talking to each other.

 

  “Jessi~ca…” he paused and trailed his index finger from the tip of her nose to her lips, “I miss you… hehehe,” he chuckled.

 

  She was on the verge of bursting into laughter but tried to hold back. This was hard. And by “hard”, I mean “really hard”. Because Cute Donghae was cute. Moreover, who doesn’t love a 25-year-old act like a 5-year-old just to make her… uhh, kiss him?

 

  Jessica just pretended to be oblivious and slapped his face playfully (but softly), opening her eyes slowly to take in every detail of his handsome features.

 

  “Are you trying to me?” she mumbled, but it was loud enough for Donghae to hear.

 

  He smirked. And I mean that jerk kind of smirk. “Please. You can’t the willing.”

 

  She gasped. “Why am I even talking to you? You broke my fragile heart…” Jessica looked away. Annoyed by his remark. You can’t the willing…

 

  ‘Lee Donghae, you bastard. I wasn’t even willing.’ But she knew that she was just lying to herself. She knew so damn well herself that she wanted to feel the pleasure of kissing him again.

 

  She stood up, trying to keep a straight face, headed to the kitchen and went through the cabinets and fridge for food. “Aish…” she mumbled.

 

  Donghae followed her and back-hugged her, just like he used to when they were together. “Yah!” Jessica pushed him away.

 

  He hung his head low and stayed that way. Afraid that Jessica might explode.

 

  He held onto her shoulder and turned her around so she could face him. He stared at her eyes and her face was reddening like a ripe tomato.

 

  “Can’t we at least be friends?” he asked, still not shifting his sight from her.

 

  She tried not to look back into his eyes, but couldn’t resist it. His eyes were alluring. It had a sense of childishness and innocence but also a touch of seriousness and… uhh… adult-ish…ness.

 

  “Jessica, I regret everything that I did to hurt you. I really am. And I don’t expect us to be together again. I know you’ll find this really creepy but if I can’t kiss you anymore, if you’ll be happy with buff daddy, I’m content if I can just see you. I’m content if we can just be friends.... I’m content…” he broke down in the middle of his charismatic speech.

 

  “I drive myself crazy everyday thinking about you. I made the biggest mistake when I let you go a few months back. And I regret that. But if you hate me, that’s okay. I understand that. Let’s just be friends, okay?” he pouted.

 

  ‘Lee Donghae, you bastard. It’s already so hard trying to resist you.’

 

  She smirked and mumbled “babo”. Oh snap. Wait a minute. Donghae knew exactly what that smirk meant. Jessica was in “evil mode”.

 

  Jessica kissed him and he widened his eyes in shock. ‘What the-’ he wasn’t even finished thinking when everything registered in his mind and he kissed back.

 

  “Oppa, I don’t want to be just friends.” Now it was her turn to pout. He looked into her eyes, again.

 

  “Stop doing that. Looking into my eyes and melting my stomach.” She giggled. “And then making me kiss you.”

 

  She crashed her lips onto his again, but this time a little longer. Lee Donghae was certainly enjoying it, judging by the way that he was smirking a little into the kiss.

 

  They parted after what felt like forever. “What about Taecyeon?” he asked.

 

  She giggled like a giddy schoolgirl. “Babo fishy… We ended our contract last week when he was getting too clingy.”

 

  His mouth fell agape. But he kissed her. Again. For the umpteenth time that night. He didn’t want it to end. He wanted it to last forever.

 

  “Are we friends?”

 

  “I guess not.”

 

  And with that, they kissed. And it wasn’t an innocent kiss. It was a French kiss. They were kissing in the middle of SNSD’s kitchen. At half past three in the morning. How romantic.

 

 “OMONAAAAAAAAAAA JESSI AND DONGHAE OPPAAAAAAAAAA” They heard a scream. Damn. Yuri had caught them making out.

 

  “Yah Kwon Yuri-” Jessica was about to scold her dongsaeng but Donghae had cut her off with another chaste kiss.

 

 

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Author's Notes: Hehehehehe sorry for the delay guys I was really caught up with preparations and our exams. Important exams to be exact. ): Mianhae...

 

Word Count (excluding AN and lyrics): (5,699 - 511) 5,188

Wow this is the longest fanfic I've written to date. I'm thinking of writing a sequel and a Super Generation one-shot collection. So look forward to that! :))

 

Comments are loved and appreciated~! ^^