Sometimes Jeremy gets tired of being happy all the time. He wants to go a day without smiling, but with press conferences and interviews it’s just not possible, and it wears him out. He doesn’t always have to be bubbly, he doesn’t always have to be cracking jokes or having fun or throwing parties. But when he doesn’t people ask questions and think he’s upset, and that’s not the case at all.

 No, he just likes the quiet sometimes. And sometimes he likes to rest and not jump around full of caffeine. Truthfully, always being this happy wares him out. It’s like he can never just be mellow or chill, he always has to have a smile on his face, for the fans and for the paparazzi. The only time he can really relax is when he’s in his room, when people think he’s napping or plotting something. 

 It’s late at night, well into the morning, when he walks into his room, having just got back from a photo shoot where he had to stay longer than the others because for some reason he wasn’t putting enough ‘energy’ into it. After hours of walking down the runway in clothes too tight for him he was finally allowed to come back to the dorm. 

 He’s slipping the vest from off his shoulders as soon as his door closes behind him, eyes closed and a hand massaging his neck. His shoulders ache, his head hurts, he’s pretty sure he twisted his ankle at one point, and he’s just exhausted. 

 “They kept you long,” the voice rings out loud in the quiet room, and Jeremy knows without opening his eyes that it’s Shin Woo walking towards him. He takes his hand and leads him to his bed, gently sitting him down on the edge. “You look exhausted,” he tells him, ing his shirt and slipping it off his shoulders. “You should tell them when enough is enough next time, okay?”

 Jeremy nods his head a little, looking up at him through half lidded eyes that are almost completely dull. He lies back as Shin Woo s his too tight pants and slides them off his legs, depositing them on the floor. 

 “Are you sore anywhere?” Shin Woo asks, sliding his hand through his blonde locks.

 “Mm, neck and shoulders ‘lil bit,” he mumbles back, grabbing onto his wrist and pulling it down so he’s cupping his cheek. He leans up a little bit, looking at him expectantly. 

 Shin Woo meets him for a soft press of the lips, brushing his lightly against his and pulling away. “How about a massage?” He asks him, running his hand over his shoulder and collar bone. “It’ll help. You know we have a mini concert tomorrow, right?”

 “Yeah, I know,” Jeremy pouts a little bit, but moves into the middle of the bed and lies on his stomach. He pulls a pillow under his head and burrows into it.

 Shin Woo settles on top of him, legs on either side of his waist. His hands are soft on his back, gentle as they knead into his shoulders. His thumbs dip below his shoulder blades before his hands slide down his back, fingers gently pushing into his muscles. 

 A small groan escapes Jeremy’s lips when his hands brush over a particularly hard know in his shoulder. Despite how little strength he had left, he managed to roll over under him so he was on his back with his boyfriend still straddling him. “Can we sleep? You’re probably tired, too, Shin Woo hyung.”

 Shin Woo leans down onto his elbows and stares into his eyes. “Are you in pain?” When he gets no reply he cradles his head with his hands and leans so close to him that their breaths mix. “Jeremy-ah, are you hurting somewhere.”

 “Aish,” Jeremy makes a face at him and reaches up to his shoulders, pulling him down a little more. “Just a tiny pain in my back. No need to worry, hyung. It’ll be gone by tomorrow.” He sloppily pecks his mouth and leans back against the pillow. “We both need some sleep.”

 The older nods, knowing not to push it because Jeremy really is tired and even if he is in pain it probably isn’t as serious as when he fell off stage and gave himself a concussion.

 “Hyung,” Jeremy cups his face, a bright –fake- smile take up his lips. “I’m really okay. No concussion or anything. We’ll sleep, okay?”

 Shin Woo nods his head and presses his lips to the younger ones, deepening the kiss by angling his head and pushing his tongue into the others warm mouth. He pulls away and kisses his cheek, smiling. “Sleep sounds nice.”

 He lies down behind him and wraps his arm around his waist, pulling his back flush against his chest and burying his head in his neck. 

 “Hyung,” Jeremy laughs, throwing his arm off him. “The lights still on.”


 When he wakes up the next morning his back still hurts and he feels like he’s barley slept, but there’s a mini concert and he knows he has to get up. Shin Woo is gone, probably to take a shower, but there’s a cup of tea on his bedside table and he smiles warmly at it before wincing. 

 Tears prick his eyes and he rolls away from it, pulling the comforter up over his head. The bed dips behind him and he feels a hand rest gently on his waist and he doesn’t want to see who it is because he already knows. 

 “I want to be alone, hyung,” he whispers, pulling the blankets up further. 

 Shin Woo ignores him and slips under the blankets behind him, curling his arm around him and pressing a kiss to his neck. “Concert was cancelled,” he tells him, “You can let your guard down.”

 And the way those words were said –or who they were said by, he doesn’t really know- just tugs at him and he doesn’t know why but it comforts him. Maybe because only Shin Woo knows the pain he faces or the exhaustion he feels and how hard it is to hold a smile. 

 He turns around in his arms and presses his face into his chest and sighs brokenly, wrapping his arms around him and clinging to him. He lets himself fall apart in his arms and it feels good to just be held through out it all.