Final
Our new homeI felt intense pain all over my body.
I could hear bones crushing and blood splattering out.
My heartbeat slowing down at a tremendous rate.
Then there was nothing.
I felt a little light all of the sudden and I stepped out of where I was lying at stared at the bloody mess.
The body was out of shape.
The limbs were sprawled in this weird manner and I couldn't even make out the face.
That body was once mine.
I then stared down at my own body.
There's no a single speck of blood on me.
I didn't feel any pain whatsoever.
Everything was fine.
But why is there still a heavy feeling weighing me down in my chest?
"ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"
A piercing scream filled the neighbourhood, disrupting its peace.
I whipped my head towards the direction of the scream, only to finding a middle aged woman running towards me, or rather, towards my dead body, crashing into me.
I fell down and landed on my bum then I got up almost immediately to check if the woman was alright.
However, she was already in front of the body, taking her phone out to call the police.
Suddenly, I felt very scared.
Was I supposed to be able to come into contact with things?
I thought I was a soul.
Or a wandering spirit.
WHAT AM I?!
I started running away.
Away from the woman.
Away from my corpse.
Away from everything.
"Hey!"
I froze in my tracks.
"Wait for me!"
This voice...
I kept sobbing to myself in one small corner of the alley after the drunkards left. My clothes were torn, and my hair was messy from being pulled by those monsters. Kris found me after God knows how long, it felt like eternity to me. Kris took off his jacket and used it to cover my body from the torn clothes and the cold. He hugged me and said, "Don't worry, I am here." but that didn't make me feel better. I carried on sobbing and sniffing in the arms of Kris, then something calmed me down.
It happened almost immediately.
Baby don't cry, tonight
当黑夜再次亮起来
Baby don’t cry, tonight
就当作没发生过一样
你永远都不会化成像泡抹一样
难道你不知道吗
So baby don’t cry, cry
我的爱守护你不分开.
This melody was foreign to me, but at the same time, it sounds as though I've heard it for a million times or more. Not that I was sick of the song or voice, but there was something to it that I could not explain. There was a burst of emotions when that song was sung. It sounded happy, like the singer really enjoys music and wants to share it with the whole world, yet sad, because he couldn't. The lyrics, I had no idea what it meant. Despite that, it not only calmed my nerves down, but it was also like a lullaby. In no time, I fell asleep.
In Kris' arms.
He tapped my shoulder and turned me around to face him. My eyes rounded.
Angel.
That was the first thing that came to my mind when I saw him.
"A-Are you an angel?" I stammered.
He laughed.
Even his laughter sounded like a melody.
"Of course not!" he exclaimed.
"I'm Luhan, and I'm just like you!"
"Y-You jumped off the building too?" I asked curiously.
He laughed again.
How could he laugh so freely, not a care in the world.
I need to learn from him.
"I'm like you because I'm dead, too."
He replied after catching his breath.
"I didn't jump off any building though."
"Then, how..?"
"In the hospital. I was comatose, battling with brain cancer. In the end, I lost the battle. But now, I feel that I have won instead. I'm free of pain, my parents' burdens are lifted off and they are starting to move on with life as well."
I looked around his face to see if there was any tinge of sadness.
None at all.
"And the best thing of all, my voice can finally be heard out loud. I've been singing in my head for the past 3 years when I was comatose. Hey, come to think of it, Sehun told me he could hear my singing before he was dead. Maybe you heard me too!"
"Sehun..?"
Luhan started singing.
This voice.
This song.
"How do you like it? I wrote it before I was diagnosed with cancer but I didn't manage to sing it out. This is actually the first time..."
He rubbed the back of his head.
My face lit up and I grabbed his shoulders and shook him violently.
"IT WAS YOU!!! I HEARD YOU A FEW TIMES WHEN I WAS SO DEPRESSED AND CRYING! I only heard this song once though, its amazing."
I went from hysterical to shy as I realised I might be over-reacting to the ange- boy in front of me.
There was silence in the air and I looked up.
Luhan was staring at me with wide eyes, a faint tinge of pink seen glowing around his cheeks.
Why was he blushi-
"You smiled."
I touched my face and felt it, I could feel the corner of my lips staying upwards.
I smiled.
For the first time in so long, I smiled.
"Come on, lets not waste any more time,"
Luhan grabbed my hand and interlocked it with his as I tried to hide my blush which I failed and earned a hearty chuckle from him,
"I've got a mission for you to complete."
I arrived in the mental hospital when I was once admitted.
I saw myself sitting in the corner of the room.
I looked around my surroundings.
As if Luhan knew what I was thinking, he said,
"We travelled back in time."
My mouth formed an 'O' as I nodded.
So many things happened that I wasn't feeling freaked out already.
I saw myself there, sobbing to myself.
Then I saw the doctors and nurses standing outside my room, looking at me worriedly.
The heavy feeling in my heart got lifted a little as I saw the scene in front of me.
Someone cared for me...
I appeared in front of a prison.
I felt a sudden surge of fear in me as I knew what I was in for and I begged Luhan not to enter.
Luhan looked at me sternly,
"We must go in."
Then his gazed softened and he squeezed my hand which was still interlocked, making me realise that and he reassured me,
"don't worry, I'll be here with you."
We entered a small room where a man sat there, handcuffed to the table.
That man, he was one of those who attempted to me.
He was going through counselling and he looked remorsed.
I slipped my hand out of Luhan's, feeling empty at the loss, and walked up the the man.
I gave a pat on his shoulder with all the courage I have in me for encouragement and the man smiled to himself, as if he knew that I was there.
"I will be a better man."
was all he said.
I walked back to Luhan who stood there shocked at what I did and I made the first move to initiate the intertwining of our hands and whispered,
"Let's go."
My heart skipped a little when Luhan hugged me and whispered into my hair,
"You were very brave."
Kris.
He was standing there.
With that girl.
I searched the area for myself.
I remembered I was standing at the direction that I was looking at, then I saw a shadow slipping away.
That must be me running away after that kiss.
My attention turned towards the girl when she mentioned my name.
"I know you loved her, everyone could see that, but I don't know why you're hesitating with her."
H-he loved me?
Like love kind of love?
I looked at Luhan helplessly for some kind of acknowledgement but he just gave a smile of encouragement.
Oh yea, he didn't know me before this.
Luhan pushed me gently towards Kris and the girl as Kris opened his mouth to say,
"I'm sorry, I don't think I can-"
My eyes widened as I knew what was coming so I grabbed Kris' hands immediately and he stopped his reply.
He couldn't see me, I knew of it, but it was as if he knew I was there giving my approval as he told the girl in front of him,
"I'll try. I'll give us a try."
The girl smiled.
Kris smiled.
And most importantly, I looked over to Luhan who was smiling at me, and I ran over back to his side, and I smiled.
"This is the last mission."
He said.
Mission?
The previous encounters were missions as well?
What for?
In a blink of an eye, we arrived.
At my house.
I turned towards the direction of the sofa.
There they were, sitting on the sofa solemnly.
I glanced at the calendar.
It was a day after it happened.
A day after I ran away that night.
Everything rushed through my mind.
That very moment before he committed the sin.
I was busy screaming and crying.
The look in his eyes.
Guilt.
Then he left.
I was so traumatized to realise that he did not do it.
My mum had tears in her eyes.
Tears of anger.
My step-dad, my dad, he was crying.
He never cried.
Luhan and I stood from afar watching.
They lost me.
It's just them.
They cannot lose each other.
Luhan spoke softly,
"Do you want me to go with you this time?"
I gave a slight nod and tugged his hand to follow me.
I walked towards my parents and stood in front of them.
I hugged both of them at the same time.
They can't feel me, and they'll probably look like they're just hugging one another.
Daddy cried even harder than before.
"I lost a daughter because I'm a monster, I don't want to lose you."
I broke away from the hug, just like they did as well, and to my surprise, Mummy and I spoke at the same time,
"You're not a monster if you feel sorry."
I wanted to ask Luhan about the mission, what was it about, then I stopped.
The heaviness in my heart, it was gone.
All gone.
Then I knew.
Forgiveness.
Letting go.
It was better for them, it was better for me.
"Hey."
I snapped out of my trance.
"We have to go now. The rest are waiting for us."
"Where?"
As he dragged me along gently.
We didn't let go our hands at all, other than some moments where I had to.
He smiled at me, his eyes twinkling like the stars that night.
"Our new home."
"I think it will be amazing."
"It will be. Since you're going too."
I returned a smile as I swung our hands a little.
Author's note:
LOL IDKANYMORE.
But yeah. Learning to forgive, learning to let go. One is brave to be able to do these.
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