Waking up alone.

Some people hate waking up alone. Some people hate it so much they make sure to bring home a warm body just so they won’t have to wake up alone. Some people wake up to chip crumbs in their sheets from when they feasted on Doritos and a Subway foot-long in bed last night.

Kyungsoo never wakes up alone. He wakes up every morning to a beautiful face beside him on the pillow, sleeping peacefully.

His cat.

Soapy.

Soapy the Ragdoll Snowshoe mix.

Or as Kyungsoo likes to call her (more frequently than he should, especially in front of company, which gets a little uncomfortable), Her Royal Highness Baby Queen Soapy: Ruler of the Universe, this Apartment, and All Things Precious. That’s her official name. But Soapy for short.

Soapy yawns and stretches next to Kyungsoo in bed. Her razor sharp claws graze Kyungsoo’s cheek, waking him up with a start.

He jolts awake with a small cry, immediately putting fingers to cover his stinging, scratched cheek. He turns wide eyes on her, looking rather hurt and upset (possibly wondering if she had lashed out at him on purpose for some crazy reason… He’s always been so good to her… Why would she do this to him?), but when he realizes she must have done it on accident in her sleep, his fears vanish like Soapy’s warm puffs of breath on a cold winter day and he forgives her without a second thought. Kyungsoo rubs her furry white chin and smiles.

“Soapy,” he whispers. “Soapy? Are you awake?” He a hand down her side. “It’s time to get up. Are you awake?” He boops her little pink nose several times and Soapy flexes her front claws and growls deep in . Maybe she hadn’t scratched him on accident. “Okay, little cutie, you can sleep,” he says fondly and gently scratches her head. He rolls onto his back and flings the covers off himself in a grand sweeping motion, startling Soapy, whose blue eyes widen as big as Kyungsoo’s. “I, on the other paw, must work today.” Kyungsoo sits up, yawning and stretching, and stops to itch his belly over the black t-shirt he’d slept in. A shirt that has somehow become a favorite to sleep in since Christmas time. An oddly familiar black t-shirt with big block letters which read F.B.I. and y silhouettes of busty girls…

(When did he switch careers to become a Female Body Inspector?)

He scoots off the edge of the bed and stands by its side, swiftly pulling the much too big shirt over his head and tosses it on the bed to join the rumpled mess of sheets. Kyungsoo pads across the plush carpet of his bedroom to the bathroom and Soapy watches as he goes. The moment he steps onto the tiled bathroom floor he halts, throws a coy look over his shoulder at his cat and, shaking his petite at her says, “No peeking, Soapy~” before shimmying his black boxer briefs down his hips. He steps one foot out from them where they have fallen around his ankles and with the other kicks them off his foot and the black underwear fly across his bedroom. Soapy’s sharp eyes dart to where they land on the carpet and tenses up, alert now, and looks like she’s considering a surprise ambush on them but should she? Would you attack a pair of dirty underpants if you were a cat? The shower turns on and Kyungsoo sings to himself as he steps in.

A lot of people like to keep an extra toothbrush in their bathroom, new and unopened, in case of friends staying over unexpectedly so they have something to use the next morning. Some people like to keep an extra toothbrush in the cup beside theirs for their significant other when they want to spend the night so the next morning the couple can happily brush their teeth together in front of the bathroom mirror, grinning and bumping hips. In the toothbrush holder in Kyungsoo’s bathroom there is an extra toothbrush next to his. It’s bright pink with a thumb grip in the middle of the handle in the shape of a cat paw. Hey, cats need to have good dental hygiene, too.

After Kyungsoo neatly combs his damp hair fresh out of the shower he brushes his teeth and gurgles, clinking the toothbrush back in the holder before picking up the pink one.

“Soapy!” Kyungsoo calls and approaches the cat lying on the bed. “It’s tooth brushing ti-”

Some people think cats aren’t very smart. They can’t learn the kinds of things dogs can. They can’t pick up on the same words and the meaning behind them. Those people haven’t met Soapy. Her keen eyes dart to the pink toothbrush in Kyungsoo’s hand and her ears point forward, listening intently to the words coming from her owner and even his cheery tone can’t fool her. At Kyungsoo’s next step closer Soapy jumps to her feet and bolts out of the bedroom. The wrestling match that ensues is too graphic for most audiences, but Kyungsoo likes to think Soapy would thank him (if she could speak) for putting so much effort into her dental care. She scratches out of love, he’s convinced himself.

Sehun sometimes prods Kyungsoo at work asking him why he treats his cat like precious royalty while he treats his employees like some form of legal slave. Why that kind, nurturing, forgiving, caring attitude doesn’t translate to the workplace. (No one dares speak of the time Kyungsoo requested Ryeowook buy him a lemonade from the food court and was given the silent treatment for the rest of the day for bringing back a drink with too much pulp when Kyungsoo had clearly said NO. PULP. “Those were sour times,” Kai reflected. “Get it, Sehun? Get it?”)

“Because my cat is cute and you’re not, Sehun,” Kyungsoo would answer flatly.

“OH, well.”

“Is your cat cuter than me, Kyungsoo?” Kai had piped in from the sweater display across the shop. An older woman browsing racks nearby looked like she was about to say NO, cat unseen.

“You’re the Least Favorite of Everyone in This Store and on Earth, Kai. What do you think?” Sehun answered in Kyungsoo’s place. (“Oh, is that my official title, Sehun? Is that it?”)

“Kyungsoo?” Kai ignored Sehun.

Kyungsoo ignored Kai.

It’s a vicious circle of everybody ignoring everybody else. This is a very professional atmosphere. It’s a wonder they get any work done, really.

Kyungsoo finally departs for his mid-day shift at Miss Junior Plus after hugging a struggling Soapy for the fifth time. Slinging his messenger bag over his shoulder he steps outside and pops the collar of his coat to guard against the chill of the afternoon air and pauses at the top of the stairs outside, under the apartment’s awning, and opens a black umbrella with a whoosh.

It’s lightly misting out. In the car, the windshield wipers screech and drag across the glass – the rain not light enough to not have them on but still steady enough to blur the view. Kyungsoo turns up the radio and sings loudly over the obnoxious sound.

Kyungsoo scurries through the parking lot, weaving through aisles of poorly parked cars, and jumps over puddles onto the sidewalk lined with thick shrubs up to the main entrance. The mall is deserted outside due to the weather. Kyungsoo is alone in his walk with the sound of his crunching footsteps and mist hitting the umbrella but as he passes by a bush he hears a faint, weak, and familiar sound. He stops dead in his tracks and strains to hear.

“Hello?” he calls to the small shrub, droplets of rain clinging to the dark green leaves. He takes a step closer. “Hello?” Kyungsoo reaches out a hand and gives a branch a shake. He hears the noise again, louder this time. “Is anyone there?” He leans over the bush to peek behind it, in the space between it and exterior wall. “Oh my god!”

Kai is diligently working* folding up a table of sweaters waiting for Kyungsoo’s arrival (*the only reason he is diligently working. Otherwise he’d be playing internet pinball).

“Kai!”

Kai jumps in surprise and spins around to find  Kyungsoo rushing in.

“I wasn’t doing anything wrong this time,” Kai blurts, but notices Kyungsoo is awkwardly holding his bulging coat around his chest. “Um, what’s up with your…?”

“Come with me to the back, hurry!”

Kyungsoo plows through the door to the back office, making Ryeowook, who is innocently working on the inventory list at the desk, shriek in surprise, sounding very much like a young lady getting robbed.

“Watch the front for a second, Ryeowook,” Kyungsoo orders, and Ryeowook nods and scurries out the door past Kai, clutching at his heart over his smart maroon knit sweater.

“Does the company offer him health insurance ‘cause I’m pretty sure you just induced some kind of heart condition,” Kai asks Kyungsoo, peering out at Ryeowook’s heaving shoulders as he slumps against the counter behind the register.

Kyungsoo rushes further into the office, eyes wide and darting about the space, searching for something. He tsks. “Ryeowook is scared of everything. He has the constitution of…” he pauses to think, gaze landing upon a stack of small boxes, “…of  an old, crazy woman who lives alone and who’s seen too many horror films.”

“O…kay, but what exactly are we doing back here, Kyungsoo?” Is he about to be disciplined? But what’s with the coat? Surely this isn’t about to turn into a steamy, forbidden love scene between boss and innocent employee (of course not because Kai is anything but innocent but a boy can dream).

“Get that box off the stack and dump it out,” Kyungsoo says, pointing with one hand while the other still holds his bulging coat to his body. A small, squeaky cry sounds from underneath.

Kai grabs the box and reads the label written on front. “This one? This one that says ‘Accounting, Payroll, Deposit Records’? Isn’t this stuff kind of… important?”

“YES, just dump it out, hurry!”

“Where?”

“ANYWHERE.”

Kai in a hesitant breath,“You’re the boss,” and dumps the boxful of important records and files in a huge heap in the corner of the office, stray papers flying in every direction, skating across the floor. He hopes he won’t regret taking this order, in case Kyungsoo changes his mind and forces him to clean up this mess later, blaming Kai for wrecking the office as if it weren’t his own command (not unusual). “Here you-” says Kai, handing over the empty box. Kyungsoo fiercely grabs it out of his hands. “-go. You’re welcome.”

Kyungsoo places the box on top of the desk and carefully begins ing his coat.

“So. Whatcha got in there? Are you cradling a baby alien that’s popped out of your chest or…?”

“Shhh. You’re going to scare it,” Kyungsoo whispers, hunching over the desk.

“I don’t think baby aliens are easily frightened, especially of humans,” Kai whispers back. “I mean, you’ve seen the movie, right? Aliens? It’s classic sci-fi.”

Kyungsoo tsks and exhales loudly. He slowly s his coat down to his waist and reaches in with one hand, gently lifting out a tiny kitten, its long fur dirty and matted, wet and shivering from being in the cold rain of the afternoon.

“That doesn’t look like an alien at all.”

Kyungsoo sets the crying kitten carefully inside the cardboard box. “I found this little baby in the bushes outside,” Kyungsoo says in a soft, sweet tone Kai has never heard, with an expression to match. How odd, Kai thinks. He didn’t know Kyungsoo was capable of feeling compassion. “I didn’t see any other babies or the mother, so I snuck it inside. I couldn’t leave it.”

“Ooh Kyungsoo, breaking the mall rules? This isn’t a service animal,” Kai jokes, leaning over the desk to peek in the box. The kitten looks up at them with scared blue eyes and meows, wobbling around the empty box on unsteady legs.

Kyungsoo glares at Kai, who smiles back uneasily and shoves his hands in his pockets. “Grab that damaged sweater from the returns box,” he orders. “There’s no way on earth I’d leave this kitten outside. I’ll risk running into a stupid mall cop for it,” Kyungsoo says, holding up the baby cat in one hand while he places the sweater inside the box to keep the kitten warm. He sets the kitten down and creates a cozy nest around it. “Listen, Ryeowook is about to get off shift. I’m going to keep the kitten but I can’t leave now to take it home and I certainly can’t leave you here alone for that long.”

“Thank you for trusting me, Kyungsoo,” Kai deadpans.

“So here’s what we’re going to do.”

We? We? Oh no.

“Before Ryeowook leaves I’m going to run down to the Dollar Store to buy a few things for the cat. You’re going to stay back here and keep an eye on it. When Ryeowook clocks out I’ll watch the front* (*since you can’t be trusted to run the store by yourself, Kyungsoo means. Sehun told him about the makeup incident where he was in the dressing room getting dolled up for twenty minutes instead of watching the store. Kyungsoo also considered banning Baekhyun from the shop somehow) for the rest of the day while you stay back here to babysit and keep it company, alright?”

Kai looks into the box again at the kitten, who’s settled down into the sweater, looking five seconds from falling completely asleep.

“Okay,” Kai consents. Watching a sleeping kitten should be a breeze. He can catch up on internet pinball on the office computer while Kyungsoo deals with whiny customers for five hours. Has a work day ever been so perfect? (No!) “Alright, Kyungsoo. I’ll watch the kitten for you.”

“Great,” Kyungsoo beams at Kai (who has to do a double-take. That’s never happened before) and checks on the kitten a last time. It’s fallen asleep and he covers it up with the sleeve of the sweater. “I’ll be back in ten minutes.”

“Great.”

*

“Oh, great. Yeah, this is great.”

Kitten sitting was going pretty well. Kyungsoo had brought back cans of wet food and set out plastic dishes from the breakroom for food and water on the floor of the small office. It was going pretty well. The kitten had been asleep for the last half hour. While it slept Kai had ruthlessly clawed his way to the top and earned the much coveted position of New High Score in pinball. (Would he remember all those little people he stepped on to get here? Not a chance.) It was going pretty well till the kitten* woke up. (*Rosemary’s Kitten, Kai called it. And for damn good reason, he’d defend to the grave, even with Kyungsoo staring daggers into his eyeballs.)

“Son of a…” Kai gets up and rushes to grab a roll of paper towels from the breakroom. “Kyungsoo?” he shouts out the door. “Your dumb cat just ran through the water bowl and spilled it everywhere.” He pauses at the office door before going back in, hand on cocked hip, completely fed up already (but he’s only seen the tip of the kitten iceberg), staring expectantly at Kyungsoo. “On the carpet.”

“So? Clean it up,” Kyungsoo says, turning a cold shoulder to him.

Kai makes a stink face behind his back and pretends to hurl the roll of paper towels at his head.

“So? Clean it up~” Kai mimics in a high-pitched, nasally voice, dropping to his hands and knees to sop up the spilled water. “You,” he scowls at the kitten, who has perked up considerably after napping and itself clean. It sits nearby, flipping its tail back and forth, just… watching. Probably feeling pretty smug watching a silly human clean up after it. “You…”

Kai is only out of the room for five minutes, throwing away soggy napkins and replacing the roll, when he comes back to find something new: the kitten standing in the middle of the plate of food, digging through it like it was searching for the prize inside a cereal box. Kai about-faces to grab the paper towels again. When he comes back there’s mushy, chicken flavored wet cat food tracked all over the carpet in the shape of cute, little kitten footprints. Wet food cakes the kitten’s feet like tiny shoes and specs cling to its chin and whiskers. Rosemary’s Kitten sits happily by the mess, a paw to swipe over its head for a bath, but ends up smearing food all over its face and ears.

Aww, this would be pretty adorable if it were happening to somebody else. But it’s not somebody else and who has to clean up after this monster again? Kai groans.

“Kyungsoo!”

“For heaven’s sake, Kai, watching a kitten isn’t that hard.” Kyungsoo stands at the doorway to the office and pops his head in. “Oh my gosh!”

“Yeah, look at this mess-”

“Little kitten footprints everywhere, oh my god!”

“All in the carpet… It’s going to smell like chicken in here for weeks.” Kai sniffs the air. “That doesn’t even smell like real chicken, eww. Kyungsoo, this is really nasty-”

“THEY’RE SO CUTE! Look at the cute little kitty tracks!”

Kai heaves a sigh. “You’re kidding me, right?”

Kyungsoo is consumed by giggles and squees, kneeling down to pet the cat where it’s not covered in smelly “chicken” food. “Do you know how cute you are right now, you little fluff ball? Waaaa, so silly!”

“Uhh, Kyungsoo?” Kai needs to know something but he’s scared to ask. Too scared of the truth.

“Hm?”

“You’re not one of those Crazy Cat Lady types, are you?”

The type who dedicates a daily style blog to what outfit they’ve dressed their cat in for the day? The type who accidentally hoards cats and gets trapped underneath a pile of them for a week? The type who collects their cat’s fur after months of brushing to spin the hair into yarn and knit a sweater with it? Kyungsoo seemed so normal before… To an extent, anyway.

He looks up from the purring cat with a hard glare. “No. And frankly, that term is offensive.”

Whew, maybe he is normal. Maybe he just has a soft spot for cute baby animals.

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

Kyungsoo stares at Kai  but quickly returns his attention to the kitten, patting its head. “No, I’m not a crazy cat lady. I’m just crazy IN LOVE WITH THEM, AHHH LOOK AT IT! EEEEEEE~” Kyungsoo squeals and picks up the baby, shoving it in Kai’s face. “Isn’t it cute?”

“I never should have asked.”

“Here, I’ve got to get back out,” Kyungsoo says, somehow sounding sane again, and pushes the cat into Kai’s arms. “Clean up the mess or else you’re paying for a cleaning crew.”

“Ahh no! It’s covered in food, Kyungsoo, don’t make it touch me! This is a clean shirt!”

The door slams shut. Kai plops the kitten on the ground and it sniffs the food tracked into the carpet.

“Clean up this mess, devil cat, or you’re paying for a cleaning crew~”

*

“Kyungsoo!”

Kai strides from the office holding up his hands in front of his chest. If there was a cactus in Miss Junior Plus you’d think he’d been trying to get fresh with it back there in the office.

“Yes?” Kyungsoo doesn’t even bat an eye at the bleeding scratches covering his hands and forearms.

“Where’s the first aide kit? Do we have one? Where the hell is it?”

“In the breakroom in the cabinet by the sink. What happened?”

“Did you know the action of moving your arm around, cleaning up the carpet, is easily mistaken for playing? And my hand easily mistaken for prey? And when you try to wipe off smelly, disgusting, dried up cat food it’s misunderstood as a full-blown attack on its life and must defend itself at all costs?”

“Ah. Well, the first aide kit is back there. Don’t get blood on the clothes.”

*

“Kyungsoo!” Kai yells from the back. “KYUNG! SOO!”

Kyungsoo keeps a smile plastered on his face as he finishes ringing up a customer. “Have a good one, ma’am,” he says, handing over the bag.

“KYUNGSOO?!”

The customer peeks past Kyungsoo with a strange expression. “Is… is someone shouting?”

“Thank you, ma’am, see you next time,” Kyungsoo smiles and shoves the bag across the counter at the woman.

She hesitantly takes it and hurries out, glancing back over her shoulder when Kai yells again.

Kyungsoo keeps his professionalism and smiles, waving goodbye as the customer leaves. “She’s never coming back.”

“KYUNGSOO.” Kai bursts from the office and brings with him a rather unpleasant scent.

“What now?” Kyungsoo catches sight of Kai’s jeans. “What is that stain?” And then the smell drifts to his nose. “What is that?” Kyungsoo whiffs the air and plugs his nose. “That doesn’t smell like cat food. What did you do now?”

“Me? What did I do?”

Kyungsoo wafts the terrible smell away from himself.

“I didn’t do anything. I was in the middle of fixing a makeshift litter box since you neglected bring one when your demon kitten climbed on my lap and went number three all over my pants.” Kai angrily points at the mess on his jeans.

“Number three?” Kyungsoo asks in a chipmunk voice as he pinches his nose shut.

“Diarrhea, Kyungsoo. That thing diarrhea’d all over my pants.”

“Ohh…” Kyungsoo bites his lip. “Um.”

“I have nothing to change into! I can’t walk around with all over me, Kyungsoo! What am I supposed to do?” Kai shrills. He catches a whiff of the terrible odor and gags.

“Okay, um, just… Wait in the back-”

“WITH THAT POOPING MONSTER?”

“-and I’ll figure something out,” says Kyungsoo, pushing Kai away, mostly to get away from the smell. (Kitten poop ain’t no joke.)

Kai is grumbling obscenities sitting in the office chair pantless when Kyungsoo walks in with several pieces of clothing draped across an arm. He’d stripped them off, careful to avoid touching the poopy areas, and stuffed them into a plastic shopping bag, tying it up tightly and throwing the bag in a far off corner.

“Here’s some-” Kyungsoo offers the new, clean clothes to Kai, but pauses, looking around the space. “Where’s the kitten?”

Kai points to the box Kyungsoo had set the cat in originally; the box that now has a lid placed firmly on top with a shoe weighing it down. The kitten meows from inside.

“Kai! You can’t trap a living animal inside a box!” Kyungsoo yells, throwing the clothes he brought in Kai’s face, followed by the shoe which Kai narrowly dodges.

“What the hell did you bring me to change in to?” Kai asks, holding up a pair of black and white vertical striped leggings and a floral print sweater better suited for Kai’s mother.

“The leggings are the smallest size we have in stock. Nothing else would fit you from the store.” Kyungsoo had grabbed a few things from their own store for Kai to wear. “I picked out an extra-long sweater, too, just in case you wanted to, um, wear it… to cover up your… I mean, the leggings might be pretty fitted…” Kyungsoo clears his throat and busies himself petting the cat.

“First I get pooped on,” Kai complains, pulling the leggings on. “Now I have to wear women’s clothing in public. That don’t even go well together, might I add? You have no taste.”

“We’re closing in an hour, calm down. Um-” Kyungsoo gapes when Kai suddenly pulls his shirt off over his head, tossing it to join his soiled jeans in the corner. “You’re…?”

“The bottom of my shirt was, ugh, smeared with poo. I hadn’t noticed before,” Kai explains, pulling the large, loose fitting sweater over his bare chest. “This is the worst day of my life,” he moans, face in hands. When he looks up he finds Kyungsoo staring at him, at a space somewhere just below his neck. “Kyungsoo?”

Kyungsoo jumps. “What? Yeah, we’re-we’re closing in an hour. If you get those clothes pooped on it’s coming out of your paycheck.” Kyungsoo stalks out in a huff.

“Why is he so pissy? I’M the one who got CRAPPED ON!”

*

Kyungsoo takes charge straightening and closing up the store on his own while Kai remains locked up with the kitten, sitting hunched with his legs up in the rolling chair to get away from the small beast who has turned his life into a smelly hell in just a matter of hours.

The steady drizzle has continued into the evening, the low hanging rainclouds glow with the colors of the city. Kai is forced again to help Kyungsoo with the cat as they walk out together to Kyungsoo’s car. On their way out Kai spots two familiar figures standing at the curb – Chanyeol holding his extra large umbrella over himself and Baekhyun, arm around the shorter’s shoulders. Kai hides his face with his shoulder and picks up the pace in case Chanyeol and Baekhyun catch him in this embarrassing get up. Those two would never let him live this down.

Kai snickers softly to himself. “Is that how he ‘moves on’?”

“Hm? What did you say?” Kyungsoo asks from his side, skipping over a puddle.

“I said, why do I have to carry this stupid box of cat when you get to hold the umbrella?”

“Because,” Kyungsoo half-smiles up at Kai, “it’s my umbrella.”

“Yeah and your cat-”

“There’s my car!” Kyungsoo shouts and jogs away.

Kai follows Kyungsoo to the drivers side as Kyungsoo opens the door and throws his messenger bag in the back seat.

“Alrighty guys, have a good night,” says Kai, mock chipper, trying to hand the kitten’s box over to Kyungsoo. “Bye little kitten, I hope I never see you again.” Except Kyungsoo isn’t taking the box. Kai pushes it towards him twice more. “Uhh Kyungsoo?”

“Hey um, I have a favor to ask you.”

“No thanks. The last time I helped you I was attacked and on, so, no. See you later!”

“Kai, wait, please,” Kyungsoo pleads and grabs him by the flowery sleeve of the borrowed sweater. “Can you help me get the kitten back to my apartment? Just hold the box while I drive, please?”

“No thanks. I’m pretty hungry and I have a ways to walk home, so-”

Kyungsoo tightens his grip on Kai’s sweater. “I have to make sure it stays in the box, otherwise it could escape and get hurt inside the car,” he says with wide, worried eyes boring into Kai’s. “I didn’t bring a shoe to trap it inside.”

Kai groans.

“Come on. You just have to hold the box while I drive. I can drive you home after I drop the kitten off so you won’t have to walk in the rain. Please?” Big brown glimmering eyes working overtime. “Kai? This is the only time I’ll ask you to do anything. You know, outside of work.”

“Fine. FINE.” Kai stomps around the side of the car and juggles the box while climbing in. The small overhead light illuminates the interior and he glances over to watch Kyungsoo sit down on… something. “What are you sitting on?”

Kyungsoo quickly slams his door shut to turn the light off. The keys jingle as he struggles to fit the key in the ignition in the dark. “I can’t see over the steering wheel so I need-”

“An old lady booster cushion?” Kai snickers. “Yeah, my grandma has one of those, too.” Kyungsoo growls deep in his throat in annoyance which only makes Kai laugh more. “You need an old lady cushion. Oh man, what are you, like, five feet tall?”

“Shut up, Kai,” Kyungsoo warns.

“Or what? You gonna hit me with your old lady cushion? But how will you see to drive?”

*

“Okay, let me just set the kitten up with some food and I’ll drive you home,” Kyungsoo says to Kai, trailing behind him as they walk into Kyungsoo’s apartment. He thanks him as Kai hands the box over. “Um, you can just… hang out for a second? I’ll be right back.”

He disappears with the kitten down a short hallway and Kai is left alone in his living room. And when Kyungsoo said ‘hang out’ Kai must have thought it meant ‘wander and snoop all over this apartment’. He meanders into the kitchen where Soapy is crunching over a small bowl. He approaches with caution.

“So you’re the good cat, huh? Can I,” he tiptoes closer, “pet you?” he asks Kyungsoo’s fluffy princess, slowly extending a hand but Soapy sees it coming, immediately stops eating, and skitters down the same hall Kyungsoo disappeared to. “No, wait, I want to pet you!” Kai chases after her with grabby hands like a little kid and follows until they end up in Kyungsoo’s bedroom. Kyungsoo and the new kitten are nowhere to be seen. “Well we’re alone now, cat. Let…me…pet…you.”

Soapy trots past a pair of black underwear lying on the floor, Kyungsoo’s from that morning, and when Kai sights them he suddenly pauses and frowns, realizing where he is. Realizing he’s in Kyungsoo’s bedroom. His manager’s bedroom. Staring at his manager’s dirty underwear. Kai pulls a face and sidesteps them. “I’ll just pretend I didn’t see that.”

Yet still he tiptoes further in, creeping up on Soapy on the other side of the room, but something else catches his attention on the bed, and not the horrible mess of sheets and blankets. “Guy doesn’t know how to make his bed?” He squints at Kyungsoo’s pajamas, inching closer to the bed. Familiar graphics on a black t-shirt. “F.B.I. Is this seriously…” He picks up the well-worn shirt to look at it. The inked graphics have cracked and faded slightly, the result of multiple washings. “My Christmas present?” He lets it fall back on the bed, feeling his heartbeat quicken. “He’s been wearing the shirt I gave him? Does this mean… What does this mean?” Kyungsoo hated the shirt enough to never wear it in public but he liked it enough to sleep in every night? “I’ll just pretend I didn’t…” he drifts off, slapping a hand over his pounding heart. “Oh god.” Butterflies? Kai? Getting butterflies? Because of Kyungsoo? “I’ll just…” he says, backing away from the bed, glancing around the room. There’s a door on the opposite side, near where Soapy is sitting, cracked open barely an inch. There’s a light on inside and he assumes it’s the bathroom. “Kyungsoo?” he calls, rounding the bed, guessing the bathroom is where he’s setting up the kitten. Soapy starts and sprints toward the cracked door. “Kyungsoo?”

“Just a second,” Kyungsoo answers from inside the bathroom.

As Kai comes closer, Soapy wants to get further away and runs to the only place she has left.

“How’s the kitten?” he asks at the same moment as Soapy barges her way through the cracked door with enough force to send it swinging wide open. “Oh my.” Kyungsoo is standing in front of the toilet, mid-pee. Very, very exposed.

“Soapy, what are you-” says Kyungsoo, but upon realizing Kai is right outside… “Oh my- Kai!”

“I-I’ll just- just pretend I didn’t see, um… everything.”

Kai zooms from the room and makes a beeline for the front door, ready to tear out and run home, rain or not. He can’t even remember the last time something had made him feel this frazzled – made him lose his cool. He just had an eyeful of Kyungsoo’s… everything. His manager’s everyTHING. That probably shouldn’t ever happen, right? His hand is on the doorknob when Kyungsoo runs into the living room (zipped up, thank god). Kai makes a point of all points not to look down anywhere below Kyungsoo’s neck.

“Hey, I’m going to um, walk home or catch the bus, so it’s-”

“Do you still want a ride home-”

They both blurt out in a rush simultaneously and Kyungsoo flushes.

“Oh, yeah okay,” Kyungsoo replies meekly, very much unlike his usual assertive self at work. “Uh hey, about what just happened-”

“I’llseeyouatworktomorrowKyungsooGottagoeatdinnerByyyeee,” Kai shouts (why is he shouting? Kyungsoo is right there) in one breath and slams the door behind him. Kyungsoo’s framed photos hanging on the wall rattle from the force.

Kyungsoo sighs and double-checks his fly.

*

Kyungsoo walks into work looking like he’s seen a hospital in the last day. It must have been a rough night in Soapy’s Kingdom (official name of Kyungsoo’s apartment).

“I’m here.” Kyungsoo sounds tired and flat.

“Hey, how’s the- woah, did someone make an attempt on your life?” Kai asks, alarmed when he notices the bright red scratches and white bandages on Kyungsoo’s forearms. The sight makes him feel queasy; he can almost feel the claw marks pulsing in pain.

“No.”

“That Hell spawn you call a kitten got to you, too?”

Kyungsoo sighs and gently runs his fingers over a bandage. “No, the baby is actually really sweet and well-behaved.”

“Um, no it’s not.”

“It was… it was Soapy,” says Kyungsoo with downcast eyes, appearing utterly betrayed and crestfallen. “Soapy attacked me last night. She’s never attacked me before… I don’t… I don’t know why.”

Is this the kind of thing you say a sympathetic Oh I’m so sorry for ‘cause Kyungsoo looks like he’s five seconds from tearing up.

“Um, do you want to talk about it?” Kai offers. Wow this is awkward. Is this the appropriate response? He has no idea. He’s never had to deal with this kind of emotional trauma.

“She didn’t react very well to the kitten, so I had to lock her out of the bedroom. But I went out to the kitchen before bedtime to feed her and when I bent down to pet her she just… attacked me,” Kyungsoo says with the tiniest of trembles. “I think she may be jealous that I brought a new cat into her kingdom and took it out on me. She seemed really… vindictive.”

Now he’s a cat whisperer? Kai wishes he never found out about this part of Kyungsoo’s life.

“Gee Kyungsoo, that sounds awful. And… scary. Scary awful. Scawful.” Is that an appropriate response?

“Kai? Can I ask you a favor?”

"No."

“I really want to try and work things out with the kitten but I don’t think I can. I don’t think I can keep it. Soapy hates it and now she hates me.”

Kai in a breath to prepare for what he knows is coming, to prepare to say NO NO NOOO to what he knows Kyungsoo is about to request of him.

“I asked Sehun if he could adopt it but he’s allergic to cats. And something about how his mother said he’s not mature enough to take care of a live animal.”

Sehun’s full of , just like that damned kitten.

“I don’t want to drop it off at a shelter. It’s just a baby.”

“Uh huh,” Kai responds flatly.

“So I was wondering if you could,” Kyungsoo gazes into Kai’s eyes with a desperate sincerity, “take the kitten? To keep, I mean. It would really mean a lot to me, Kai. Really. Please?”

Wait, it would mean A LOT? To Kyungsoo? Kai could do this one thing that Kyungsoo would appreciate?

“I thought you weren’t going to ask me for any more favors?”

Kyungsoo takes a small step forward and stares even harder. His chin quivers for a fraction of a second. “Please. It’s just a baby, Kai.”

“…Fine. FINE.”

*

“Hi Kai! How’s the kitten?” Kyungsoo asks brightly a couple weeks later, when Kai strolls into work for the afternoon.

“Oh it’s great! We’re getting along great!” Kai grins, not missing a beat.

“See? I knew you’d love him.” Kyungsoo pats Kai on the shoulder with a sweet smile.

*

“Hey,” Kai calls Chanyeol that night. “How’s the kitten?”

a/n: wheeeeew that was a lot of nonsense. I hope you liked it a little bit at least :)