Kai and Kyungsoo met for almost a month but it felt like they have known each other for ages. They were inseparable.

Every one adoeres Kyungsoo. He's handsome, has an angelic voice, smart and talented. He's an epitome of perfection, but he also has diificulties. Kai is very lucky with his friendship with Kyungsoo, who helps him a lot in everything. Eventhough he already graduated, the latter still makes time just to keep in touch with his friend. Kai, on the other hand, is the total opposite of  Kyungsoo. He false short of Kyungsoo's intelligence. He always depends on the ability of others and he's unfortunately out of the tune-- his low grades in his Music subject prove it so.

 

 

 

 

"You look horrible, Kai! Spill it." Kyungsoo exclaimed. They were at the caef near the university, having a good time and filling up the days they haven't seen each other.

 

"Look Hyung, I got a low grade in my Music subject that I somehow wished to kill my professor now. You know what he told me? It was because of being out of tune! I can't even look up because he told me that in front of the class. They even laughe at me! I'm such a failure!" Kai cried out. Every one in the cafe looked at them suspiciously.

 

"Breath in. Breath out" Kyungsoo said and Kai followed.

 

"ssh,  don't cry Kai. Maybe your professor doesn't know what music is. he hardly appreciate great voices like yours. let me sing a song for you; it's my latest composition. You're lucky to be the first to hear it," Kyungsoo said smilingly showing his heart shaped smile while poking the side of Kai's cheek. 

 

Kyungsoo always has earphone connected to his ears that make him listn to different kind of songs to improve his singing talent. He  started. Slowly and smoothly, it soothed Kai's stressed mind and body. Kai, on the other hand, relly envies his Hyung; how he wished he could be also like him. He did'nt realize he was spaced out for a while that he did'nt  noticed that Kyungsoo has already stopped singing.

 

 

"Hey! You know? I hate you. You were not listening to me." Kyungsoo was half joking,

 

"No. it was really great! I really envy you, Hyung"

 

"Don't be, Kai"

 

"But why?"

 

"Just... Don't be."

 

---

 

It's monday and it's damn music class again. Kai uncomfortably sat on his usual place. He felt all eyes were on him, digging holes inhis body.He even took a bath, his uniform was well-ironed , too.

"But why? Crazy people." He thought. 

Anxietty kept his palms sweating really hard. "What the hell?" He mouthed to himself.

The professor came in and discussed their lesson for today and also left an assignment. They were given a piece and they need to match it to the pitch. That is how their final exam is going to be. He immediately called Kyungsoo to help him out. Of course, Kyungsoo can't say No to his friend so he accepted it. Kai didn't not mentioned taht it was for their final exam. After Kyungsoo was done, he already passed it with confidence that he will passed that subject. But fate was against him. The professor said that the pitch don't match the piiece given. His world crushed into pieces;  he failed again.... Anger and hatred filled his heart toward Kyungsoo. He doesn't want to see him anymore.

 

 

 

After a month of thinking things over and with Soo stopping his constante texts and calls. He tried to talk to him in person too but Kai just made alibis and excuses. Kai realizes his fault. Why does he need Kyungsoo work on his assignment when he should be the one bearing all the hardships just to get through his studies. Guilt hit him hard. He decided to visit Kyungsoo and reconcile with him. He wouls be saying sorry for the stupidity of blaming his friend. He realized he missed him, he felt like a brother. 

 

He knocked the door softly. Kyungsoo's mother opened and welcomed him.

"Aunt, is Hyung at home?" Kai asked politely. 

 

Sadness filled up her eyes. He can even see some tears threatening to fall from those eyes. He was confused. Was there a problem? It took minutes before she spoke. 

 

"He left.... a-and we don't know where he had gone to. We have done everything to find him but..." She broke down. Seeing her like that made Kai's throat dry and his knees weakened by the revelation. It was all his fault. He started crying. 

 

"He left this in his room,." she said, carrying a small box a nd handing it over to him. "He also left a note for you"

 

Kai accepted the box and opened to ee Kyungsoo's MP3 player. He remembers his friend bringing it whwerever he goes and doen't let anyone touches it. Pressing the play button but hearing no sound. Tears fell down from his eyes.

 

"Kyungsoo was very special. He was deaf since he was born." she said

Kai was taken aback with the news. He didn't even know....

"...but he was truly an achiever, and pursued his dreams despite of his disability. You are really special to him, and he only wants to make you happy even tho-.."

"... but how?.. how he can still understand me?" Kai cut her off, his voice became hoarse of too much crying. 

" he has the ability to read lips."

 

 

Kai left, and ranas much as he can. He can't understand why these things were happening to him, to Kyungsoo. He's helpless piece of junk who always depends on Kyungsoo, but now he's gone. Kai reached the end of a cliff and shouted.

 

"HOW MUCH LOUDER DO I NEED TO SCREAM WHEN YOU WON'T EVER HEAR ME?"

He cried louder and louder. No one will ever hear him; Kyungsoo will never hear him.

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a/n: 

thank you for reading ^^

angst