This one's for you, Candice :)

December 25^th. Christmas Day has always been my favourite day of the year. I even enjoy it more than my own birthday. Even if Christmas was spent almost the same as the previous year, I just loved celebrating it with the people who I loved the most. They are my beloved parents, best friend and boyfriend. I’m the only child in my family, hence I didn’t have siblings to share presents and turkey with, but I guess my boyfriend’s siblings and my cousins made up for it. However, my parents are away on a holiday in Bali this year. So, I’ll just have to send my wishes through FaceTime on my MacBook. Technology does wonders in life.

So, I open my laptop, only to admire my desktop wallpaper. It’s a photo of my boyfriend and I posing with a gigantic and sparkly Christmas tree outside Lotte World Shopping Mall last year. Opening the FaceTime application, I scroll down my contacts list to find Umma.

“Merry Christmas Umma! Merry Christmas to you too, Appa!” I said with my best smile. Seeing my parents wearing loose, tropical-patterned clothing and coconut hats, they seem to be having the time of their lives away from home, away from the brutal winter.

“Merry Christmas to you too, our lovely daughter!” My parents said, while forming a heart shape with their arms. It’s a little embarrassing for grown adults to do such action but they’re my parents so it’s okay. I reluctantly return the favour with my own heart.

“Thank you! Are you having fun in Bali? It must be burning hot over there.” I asked.

“Ah, it is indeed hot but it’s really beautiful here. Everyday the sunshine is nice and relaxing. The beaches are clear, fresh and cooling. Oh, and the resort that we’re staying at is huge.” Umma explained. I’m envious. If only I didn’t have to do my work experience at the law firm during this week, then I could’ve tagged along with them. Well, at least I had today off.

“Aw, I’m jealous. You guys are having a hot Christmas while I’m stuck here alone to spend yet another White Christmas. Let’s go on holiday together next year.” I said.

“Okay, we’ll take you on a trip next year. Hah, don’t kid with us. You’re never alone. You have Wooyoung remember? You guys always spend Christmas together and leave us oldies at home.” Appa said. That is true. Jang Wooyoung and I have been best friends for a decade, since the start of high school. He’s also my boyfriend of three years. To put it short, we have spent the last nine odd Christmases and birthdays together with the last few being a little different. Two words - couple dates.

“I know, I know. He’s great but it’s just not the same without my lovely parents.” I nagged. I miss them already and they’ve only been away for three days. It’s lonely being the only one in the house. Wooyoung has been busy recently so he doesn’t stay over often.

“Our little daughter, we’ll be back in a flash! Don’t be grumpy pants on your favourite day of the year. Go out with Wooyoung and enjoy yourselves. Eat some scrumptious turkey at that restaurant you always go to and your favourite vanilla ice cream and waffles at Haagen Dazs; then you’ll be happy!” Umma suggested. That is my ritual with Wooyoung for Christmas, along with skating at the ice rink near Han River. Despite doing the same things each year for the last decade, we never got bored of it. As long as we were together, that’s all that matters.

“Alright then. Thanks Umma, Appa. The doorbell is ringing, so I better head off and let you two enjoy your romantic date ahead. I love you!” I said, as I stood up from the couch.

“Bye, dear. Have fun and be safe! Don’t drink too much like last year! Send Wooyoung our greetings. We love you too!” Appa said, before waving their hands rapidly in front of me, like two children. I quickly log off and shut my laptop before running towards my front door.

I opened the door, only to see a deliveryman holding a beautiful bouquet of purple tulips in his hand.

“Miss. Kim Cece? You have a delivery. Please sign here.” The deliveryman said, as he handed me his touch screen device. I happily sign it. The aroma from the tulips is lingering through my nostrils. This is the purple that I loved the most.

“Yes, thank you. Merry Christmas!” I greeted with a slight bow before taking the bouquet out of his hands and closing the door.

Taking these gorgeous tulips to my dining table, I look at the small red and white envelope that is stapled onto the green wrapping. Like I predicted, or rather expected, these are from my Wooyoung. That chingu may not be perfect, but he is at least sweet enough to remember things like this. Maybe that’s why I love him so much.

The message reads:

To: My Cece

Merry Christmas, babe! Ah, it’s been another year already. Time flies by quickly, doesn’t it? I’m sorry for being so busy that we haven’t seen each other a lot these days. Let’s spend today like how we always do. I’ll make you the happiest woman in the world tonight so please look forward to it!

You know that I love you like there’s no tomorrow,

Your Wooyoungie ^.^

Jang Wooyoung is a man of kind, cheesy and infectiously honeyed words. I should be used to it by now, since he’s always been that silly and loving boy from day one. But just because he has been my best friend for longer than he has been my boyfriend, it doesn’t mean that I don’t feel all giddy and spoiled like a young teenager when he sweet talks me. So no matter how mad I am with him, no matter how badly he upsets or disappoints me, he definitely knows how to cheer me up and make me happy again. I love him for that, but of course, being a strong-willed 23-year-old woman, I will always remember those hurtful times.

Still having a goofy grin on my face, I take out my phone to thank my Wooyoungie. I pressed #3 on my speed dial.

“Merry Christmas, Wooyoung-ah!” I said cheerfully.

“Merry Christmas to you too, my Cece! Did you receive my flowers?” Wooyoung replied with his husky tone, which I can never get sick of.

“I sure did. Thank you, Woo. They are my favourite. I’m surprised that you actually remembered.” I teased.

“No worries. What kind of boyfriend would I be if I couldn’t even remember what my girlfriend likes?” He said.

“A bad one who I won’t stick with.” I joked.

“Good answer, I probably wouldn’t stick with a guy like me either. Anyway, I got to head off to do some errands now. I’ll see you tonight at the Cloud in Han River. I love you, gorgeous.” He said.

“Okay, I’ll see you at our usual place! I love you too, Wooyoung-ah.” I said, before hanging up our call.

…

It is 5pm in the afternoon, and I’m meeting Wooyoung at the restaurant at 6:30. So, it’s about time that I start getting ready for our date. Two days ago, I bought this mid-length, rose coloured lace dress just for today’s occasion. I decide to style my hair in soft curls and in a side ponytail, tied with a red ribbon. Applying some light foundation, concealer, eyeliner, mascara and some peach flavoured Juicy Tube lip-gloss, my make-up is done. I don’t usually wear a lot make-up, but I guess I’m still a girl who likes to dress up nicely. Putting on my skin-coloured stockings, and taking out my black kitten heels and navy blue trench coat from my wardrobe, I’m almost set to go. I then walk into the living room to lock up the doors and to get Wooyoung’s present from the coffee table. With one last look at the mirror in the corridor, I then take my leave.

Since it’s Christmas, there are carols and winter-themed songs being played on the radio. As I’m switching from one station to another, I come across the song that’s being played in my head during this winter. That is, ‘Miracles in December’ by EXO. It is a rather sad and depressing song. The lyrics are meaningful and actually relates to my feelings too. My relationship with Wooyoung may seem perfect and great because we are best friends whose platonic feelings blossomed into love but sometimes, it’s not all that merry. There are times where I doubted our love, doubted our trust and it was difficult to go back to when we were the happiest. I guess that relationships in general are hard to form, yet are even harder to maintain. But it’s Christmas, and all I want to do is forget about the things that are bothering me and just enjoy this date. I switch the station again, saying goodbye to D.O’s smooth voice. Now it’s ‘Smoky Girl’ by MBLAQ playing.

After a fifteen-minute drive, I arrive at the Cloud Café. Outside the café, there is a small, silver coloured Christmas tree with light blue decorations and flashing lights. Next to the tree, there is an adorable snowman that has reindeer ears and a warm green scarf. Seeing couples snuggling up to each other on the way into the restaurant and those already sitting inside while staring at each other intently with loved filled eyes, I myself is feeling excited to seeing my own partner.

“Hi, I made a reservation under the name of Kim Cece for two.” I said to the manager at the counter.

“Hello, please come through, Miss. Kim.” She said politely, before leading me to my table with the window view.

I walk towards to the table, which is the same table that Wooyoung and I sit at every year. It was in the centre of the row of window seats, and the luxurious view of Seoul city can be seen clearly.

“Would you like to order any drinks before your guest arrives?” The waitress offered.

“Water is fine, thank you.” I said with a nod. I didn’t want to be drunk by the time Wooyoung comes. That would just spoil the night and I knew better than that.

I flip through the menu to see what Wooyoung would like to eat. Of course, the roasted turkey with caramelised cranberry relish is a must. Maybe the special Busan lobster dish with crab salad too. Wooyoung loves seafood, especially if it’s from Busan, his hometown. He was the guy who would always worship his birth town.

Unknowingly, time has flown fast. It has already been twenty minutes past 6:30, the time that we were meant to meet. Wooyoung never used to turn up late to anything, whether it is for a Uni lecture or our dates, but recently, he’s formed this bad habit. He’s busy these days with his dance academy, or so he tells me. But sometimes, using that or ‘bro trouble’ as an excuse just doesn’t cut it. He probably thinks that I don’t mind about these things, but I do mind. I hate it, in fact.

I finally take out my phone to message him. I’m beginning to worry if something bad happened to him. Like if he left his keys at the academy or his car broke down. If it does happen, it wouldn’t be the first time and I would obviously have to go over and help the clumsy guy.

To: Wooyoungie

Hey, Woo, where are you? It’s already been half an hour and you still haven’t come to Cloud. Did something happen? I’m worried.

I sent the message before calling him. Wooyoung doesn’t check his messages often these days.

Hi, this is Jang Wooyoung. Sorry for not being able to answer your call. Please leave a message after the tone.

Message bank. Well, this is great, fantastic even. Jang Wooyoung, you really are one of a kind.

Where are you, Woo? I’ve been waiting for you for ages now. Please call me back.

Instead of calling me back, it would be even better if he’d just appear in front of me right now. Looking back and forth in the dining room and it seems like the restaurant is packed. It’s almost a full house in here, filled with couples. It looks like I’m the only one who is alone, at a table that is meant for two but still waiting for their date. I can see many stares from others who are whispering and giggling to each other. Yeah, that’s awesome for you guys who have your dates there on time. Though, at a glance, I see that there is one guy who is also alone at the furthest table towards the right. Or maybe he was waiting for someone just like me.

I check my phone for the nth time and there was nothing. No new notifications with ‘Wooyoungie’ written on them. There were only notifications from Facebook where people posted their greetings on my wall. Most of them hoped for me to spend a ‘lovely and romantic Christmas with Wooyoung’. All I can do is reply ‘Thank you, and yes I will indeed!’ It’s not like I wanted all of my 850 friends on social media to know that I am about to get stood up for about the sixth time this month.

After twenty unanswered calls and ten unresponsive texts, a painful hour has past, and my boyfriend still hasn’t shown his face. When or if he comes, I’m going to do more than punch that handsome face of his. At this rate, the waitress must be on the verge of kicking me, being a lonely and highly angered woman out of their fully reserved restaurant. She isn’t on the verge; she is about to jump off it.

“Miss Kim, my apologies but unfortunately your table has been reserved for another couple at 8:00 and it appears that they have arrived early so—“ The waitress said in the nicest way possible before I cut her off to save me from my embarrassment.

“Okay, I understand. Sorry for wasting these seats. I’ll pay for my jug of water.” I said. I tried not to come off as annoyed right now, though I wasn’t anything but annoyed. Yes, I even drank a whole jug of water. How awkward and pathetic is that.

“Don’t worry about it. Merry Christmas Miss Kim! I hope you still get to enjoy the rest of tonight.” The waitress said kindly. Ah, this girl was sweet and had great customer service but her kind words aren’t helping my rush of bad temper.

“Thank you. I’ll try, and Merry Christmas to you too.” I said, without adding ‘See you next year’ like I would usually say because well right now, I’m pretty sure I won’t be back and I’m going to make sure Jang Wooyoung doesn’t either.

I step out of the restaurant without the present and I looked around for one last search and chance for Wooyoung. He is nowhere in sight. Yeah, I’m officially that girl who had been stood up on her favourite day of the year. It just had to be today, our day. I should’ve at least eaten something but no, I have immaculate dining etiquette so I will never eat before my guest. And who eats turkey and pudding by themselves anyway? I’m probably the only person in Seoul who is alone. Well, except for that guy at the restaurant but I assume that his partner or date or whoever must’ve shown up. No one is as unlucky or unfortunate as I am.

I walk along the bridge on top of Han River with light steps. There are couples everywhere. The girlfriend had their hand held inside the boyfriend’s pockets to beat the frosty chill. Wooyoung likes to do that and I would pretend to refuse him but I secretly liked it. His hands were always so warm, opposite to mine being cold. But he obviously isn’t here to do that so all I can do is to put on the grey gloves that he coincidently bought for me last Christmas. I keep walking forward, and I then see families, holding the hands of their young children, walking so happily together. My parents aren’t even here when I want to hold their hands the most. Yes, even a grown young woman like me still loves holding onto my good old parents. I notice another couple were probably around 50 years old, so around my parents’ age, embracing each other ever so lovingly. It was a beautiful sight, a beautiful moment that I could have also been sharing with Wooyoung on this cold, wintery night.

My legs are beginning to freeze because of this stupid, short dress and thin stockings are failing to give me enough warmth. Having cold hands, and a cold heart isn’t enough but my body is about to turn into ice. But you know what, to beat the cold air and to warm up my body and heart, I am going to try to enjoy the rest of this year’s Christmas. Like how the waitress suggested so. Who needs a man whose whereabouts are unknown and whose phone is not the only thing disconnecting, when I can have just as much fun by myself. I’ve always been an intrapersonal character. It’s only with him when I open up a little…

Things aren’t getting any better for a lost soul like me. I could feel my eyes watering. Soon enough, tears are falling down my cheeks and my nerves on my face were numbing. So, I start to run and run as fast as I could. I’m crying, I’m screaming, I’m running my way to the ice rink. It’s the first or possibly second time in my life that I have felt like a hopeless, naïve and love struck idiot who is completely selfless.

I arrive at the ice rink nearby the restaurant and as expected it was full of people who are, or think they are in love. It could not be avoided, so it is about time I forget about these people around me and just let loose. I paid the ahjussi fifty won for the ice skating shoes in exchange for my kitten heels. Then I head off onto the rink and as I make twist and turn after another, all the mess and distress in my mind is slowly disappearing. I skate around the ice rink with my right arm loosely threading the bitterly cold air. Reminiscing to every other time I come to this ice rink, the position next to me, the opened hand would be filled with Wooyoung. We used to learn ice-skating during the ninth grade just as a new hobby. The lessons didn’t last long but it was then where we grew fond of the sport. That is why; we’d always come here during each winter season.

Wooyoung would wrap his arms around my waist from behind, as we would glide together. Sometimes he would hold my hands and twirl me around in circles while skating in the centre of the rink. When I was tired, he would even piggyback me. But in reality, we haven’t ice-skated like that in a while.

I attempt to twirl myself in a circle like how Kim Yuna does it, but without Wooyoung’s help, my shoes got caught and skidded along the ice, causing me to fall over. I’m taking this fall, because I want to knock myself real hard in the head if possible so I could forget about this even happening and maybe, just maybe, he would come and save me. But just before I collapse onto the hard ice, an arm pulled me back up from doing so. Wooyoung, you’re finally here, you bastard.

“Are you okay, Miss? Please be more careful. The ice rink is very slippery.” A tender, yet deep voice called. It isn’t Wooyoung’s husky voice. Of course it isn’t.

I slowly open my eyes to face the man who saved me from falling and a few bruises, most likely near my backbone. He, with dark brown hair and bangs neatly styled to his left side and with a unique eye smile, was strikingly good-looking. He may be a stranger that is kind enough to help a dazed and abandoned girl like me, but I think that I’ve seen him from somewhere before.

“Miss, are you alright? Are you hurt anywhere?” The young man said.

“I-uh, I’m alright. T-thank you for catching me.” I stuttered nervously. I shyly avoid any eye contact with my savior. He helped me to stand straight with his strong arms. Now we are facing each other. I guess it could not be helped.

“No worries. Merry Christmas, and enjoy the rest of your night.” He said with a tender smile. This guy had a very attractive smile, a smile that could kill a girl’s senses. And my own senses are eating away by the second. His face really looks familiar and I definitely know that I’ve seen him before. Staring at him blankly, it finally came to me. He was the guy who sat alone at the restaurant.

Just as the guy from the restaurant begins to part from me, I call out to him.

“Wait!” I yelled, while following behind him. Why am I calling this stranger? I don’t even know him. Just because he was alone at the restaurant, it could be very likely for a handsome guy like him to be waiting for his girlfriend. Not every is as unlucky as I am.

“Yes?” He asked in surprise.

“Um, sorry, it maybe just me but you look very familiar for some reason. Were you dining at the Cloud Café earlier? I think I saw you there.” I asked curiously. I hope I am not coming off as some crazy stalker.

“Oh, so you did notice me.” He laughed. It really is him. I suddenly feel a burst of relief. Is it the relief of knowing that I’m not alone? I know that is very selfish of me to think that, but I just have a desire to comfort the guy. That is, if he needed it.

“Hi, I’m Junho. It’s nice to meet you.” He greeted with his lips curved on the ends into another sweet smile. He offers his hand out for a friendly handshake. I willingly place my hand into his and shook it twice.

“Hi, Junho-ssi. I’m Cece. It’s nice to meet you too.” I said in the friendliest way possible. Am I flirting with this guy? I don’t think I am. All I want to do is to show my gratitude for him saving me.

“So, Cece-ssi, what brings you here? Are you waiting for someone?” Junho asked. Someone, that someone is my frustrating boyfriend. Within the past five minutes, I can confidently say that I almost forgot about him. I’ve been overly drawn to the dashing guy in front of me.

“I, well, unfortunately got stood up today. So I’m trying to spend my Christmas happily, regardless. Like doing the things that I had planned.” I confessed rather bitterly but still with a smile on my face. The last thing I want is for Junho-ssi to pity me.

“Boyfriend issues, I see?” Junho said while nodding like he understood everything I was feeling at this moment.

“I guess you can call it that. Today, I am just one of those girls who doesn’t know where the hell their boyfriend is and is fed up with waiting for a reply or an explanation.” I said.

“It to be you. We are on the same boat then. Call me crazy for asking a stranger this. Would you like to spend Christmas with me, Cece-ssi?” Junho asked sincerely. I can see it in his eyes. They seemed perfectly fine on the outside, but deep inside, I can see that he was just as lost and flawed as I was.

“Hah, you cannot be serious. We just met, buddy.” I laughed, brushing of his question.

“I am dead serious. Why not? Since we are both lonely souls who just want to celebrate this wonderful holiday without a care about anything. So what do you say? I saw how you were staring at those couples in envy.” Junho chuckled. We really are crazy. I’m crazy to be convinced by him. I slap his arm for his remark. How did he know I was staring?

“Violent are we now? That’s not a good way to treat a guy you just met.” Junho teased. So he is the kind of guy who loves to joke around. He’s just like him.

“Okay, fine. Let’s do it. Let’s spend Christmas together, Junho-ssi.” I agreed. I am beyond crazy. I’ve lost it, but I like this feeling of being set free. It is the first time that I don’t feel suffocated in a long while.

Junho nodded happily and offers his hand. I hesitate a little.  Technically I am certainly not single. I have Wooyoung. But right now, he isn’t here. He is probably too drunk at some bar again, waiting until the clock ticks 4am just to call me to pick him up. It’s about time that I loosen up my shoulders and have some fun. I place my hand shyly into Junho’s. We begin to skate together with his hand gripping tightly onto mine. His hand was cold, unlike the warm hands that Wooyoung had. Both of our hands are cold. That way we can make our own heat.

“Do you want to spin like the couple over there?” He asked as he points to a young, teenage couple towards my right who are spinning in a circle ever so gracefully.

“Sure.” I answered, as Junho grabs onto my other hand and pulls me around in a circular motion.

We were spinning in 360 degrees. Junho spun me fast and all our surroundings began to blur. It’s like we are in a world of our own, forgetting about all our stresses at that moment.

Suddenly, I found myself falling into Junho’s arms, with my head hitting his hardened chest. Junho let out a small gasp in shock, as I reached for his waist for support. I didn’t want to fall over again; I didn’t think I needed to smash my head onto the ice to regain my senses. Suddenly, I feel Junho’s arms tugging around my shoulders. He is hugging me.

Thirty seconds later, Junho was the one who spoke out first.

“Sorry, Cece-ssi. This is awkward isn’t it?” Junho whispers into my ear.

“It’s okay…Surprisingly, I don’t feel awkward at all.” I said. It’s strange, but I felt safe in Junho’s arms. So safe that I don’t want to let go of his embrace.

“Are you sure?” He asked again, while loosening his grip around me.

I nodded, as I hugged him tighter.

“Just imagine me as him.” He stated, and I followed. I close my eyes and begin to imagine that Wooyoung was holding me. I tried really hard to, but I couldn’t. This feeling, this warm, fuzzy feeling that I am having right now is like electricity running through every inch of my body. I never felt like this when I was with Wooyoung. Sure, I would be flustered but I was comfortable because Wooyoung is just so familiar to me.

I bury my face into Junho’s neck, as he my hair lovingly. Maybe he is imagining that I am his girlfriend. He doesn’t know that I am not thinking about my own boyfriend.

“So, what do you have planned next, Cece-ssi?” Junho asked as he let go of me reluctantly.

“I would like to go to Haagen Dazs.” I said. Junho nods in agreement.

Leaving the ice rink, we start to walk to the ice cream shop. Arm in arm.

…

We arrive at Haagen Dazs after a short walk. Walking into a place with someone next you is definitely better than walking in alone, especially on a day like this. Junho looks at the menu to see what ice cream he wants.

“Aren’t you going to look, Cece-ssi?” Junho asks as he leaned closer towards me with his menu.

“I’ve already decided. I always order the waffles with vanilla ice cream.” I answered. Classic vanilla ice cream is my favourite. I know it’s the most boring flavour but I like the simplicity of its taste. Wooyoung, being the strawberry lover he is, would always refuse to share vanilla with me. Even when we would order a waffle and have a scoop of each, he would never touch mine.

“Oh really? I love vanilla too. I don’t eat anything other than vanilla.” Junho said. We are similar in so many ways.

“Hah, I guess we are the same then,”

“Hi, can we please order two large waffles with a double scoops of vanilla?” I said to the waiter at the counter.

“Is that all for tonight?” He asks. I nodded.

“That comes to 19,000 won thank you.” I scramble for my wallet in my bag, until I felt Junho’s hand on my shoulder.

“Thank you.” Junho said after handing the waiter the exact amount. He is such a gentleman.

“Junho-ssi, you didn’t have to. It’s meant to be my treat. Here, please take it.” I pouted while trying to pay him back the amount. It was great enough of him to prevent me from falling and accompany me tonight.  Shouting me ice cream has already gone beyond what a stranger would do.

“Don’t even try. Just say thank you, and treat it as my Christmas gift to you. Merry Christmas, Cece-ssi.” Junho said. He is not only funny and considerate. He is also manly for a guy who looked younger than me.

“Ah, okay. Thank you, Junho-ssi. Next time, it’s my treat!” I said rather awkwardly. Why did I say next time? How do I know if I’ll see this guy again? How do I know that he would want to see me again? I probably am coming off as some creep.

“Sure.” Junho answered willingly, like it wasn’t the first time that we’ve eaten together. I smiled in delight because maybe we could be friends after tonight.

I lead Junho to my usual table. Before reaching the table, I see that it’s occupied. He is here.

“Wooyoung.” I frowned. Junho is smart enough to grasp the tensed atmosphere between Wooyoung and I. He took several steps back.

“Cece, baby, I can explain! I am so, so sorry that I couldn’t make it to dinner, or for ice-skating. Something came up with my mother…. But I’m here now. Please forgive me.” He grabs onto me. I give in for a moment. No, not again, not tonight, not ever.

“Let go, Wooyoung.” I said calmly. There are more meanings to my words than intended.

“You’re mad, of course you are. I’m the bastard, the jerk that stood you up again. I am so terribly sorry. I had an emergency. I’m not lying to you, Cece-ah.” Wooyoung confessed as he held my hands with his. He looks so pitiful at the moment. He looks like a mess and the smell on him tells me everything.

“You had an emergency. An emergency that made you reek in alcohol. Good try, Jang Wooyoung. You’re truly jjang. You don’t even try to cover up that disgusting smell. All you do is get drunk every night and go to the bar in Hongdae to get laid with some s. You don’t even want to sleep with me. Hell it’s been a year since our last time. You’re one sick bastard who knows it too.” I said angrily. This is the first time that I have faced the problems that we had in our relationship. Despite my teary eyes, I feel like the mount of pressure on my tiny shoulders has fallen off. I have never felt so free. I can finally breathe.

“Okay, I admit it. I just got carried away before I was meant to meet you. My friend was having a hard time and she called me over to comfort her. I’ve always wanted to make love to you. Hell, I want to every single day. But you just seem so hesitant.” Wooyoung defended. I don’t know who is more pathetic, him or me. He would always be too tired or intoxicated to do anything for that matter. No matter how hard I tried to embarrassingly seduce him within the last year, he would refuse me. It got to a point where I doubted myself as a woman.

“She. Yeah, at least you’re honest and not using Chansung as an excuse again. You’re the one who didn’t want to. You were always too drunk to want it. Hell, you even called another woman’s name in every drunken episode that you made me deal with. I don’t want to do this anymore, Wooyoung-ah.” I cried. Our relationship is not healthy at all. We’ve been suffering way too much and I just can’t handle it anymore. No matter how much I loved him.

“Babe, don’t say that. I love you, you love me and there’s no one else. We’ve been in love for a decade. You need me.” Wooyoung said with tears streaming down his face. I’ve seen him cry many times before, but this time it is different. Even though his arrogant words are making me want to strangle him, they are right. Too right.

“You don’t love me like you did. You’ve changed. I don’t even recognise the goofy, gentle and loving Jang Wooyoung who used to be mine anymore. We’ve dragged this for too long. It’s over Wooyoung. This time, it really is, chingu-ah.” I sobbed, as Wooyoung’s tears kept on falling. It pained me to death to see him like this. It pained me to see him at all.

“No. You can’t do this to me. Even after all we’ve been through, I still love you. I know it may not seem like it, but you are the only woman in my heart. I can’t live without you, so it’s not over. It never will be.” Wooyoung exclaimed.

Wooyoung then holds onto my cheek and smashes him lips onto mine. I try to use all my strength to push him away but his grip just tightens onto my body. All I can do is to bite his lip as hard as I can. He finally pulls away at that instant. He knew that I didn’t want it. He might be semi-drunk, but his senses are still inside his foolish brain. I look at him with hurtful eyes, as he softens his expression. He isn’t as aggressive as before. He looks guilty.

“Cece-ssi, are you ready to go?” Junho comes in between us and pulls us apart. He drags me over to his side and naturally drapes his arm over my shoulder.

“Who the hell is this, Cece?” Wooyoung grunted, while grabbing the collar of Junho’s plaid shirt. How dare he lay a finger on Junho-ssi?

I immediately pushed him off of Junho. Wooyoung stared at me with that infuriated expression of his.

“Oh, who is this guy? Let me tell you Jang Wooyoung. He’s the sweet, handsome and considerate guy that I’m spending my Christmas with. We ate dinner together at the restaurant we used to go to, we went to the ice rink and skated in each other’s arms like how we always did and we are just about to eat vanilla waffles too. He loves vanilla, unlike you. Hm, I guess he just replaced you. Replaced what you should’ve done with me tonight. Junho-ah, this is Jang Wooyoung…my best friend that I had loved for a whole, entire decade. Caution; he may bite.” I said with conviction. I held onto Junho even tighter. I’m not making Wooyoung jealous. I am proving to him that I didn’t need him so that he can let go. We can both let go. I just hope that Junho would understand.

“Hello, I’m Lee J—“ Without finishing his greeting, Wooyoung pulled the trigger and punched him. He didn’t deserve this. I gave Wooyoung the biggest slap across his left cheek, venting out all my anger.

“YAH, JANG WOOYOUNG! HOW DARE YOU?” I yelled, as I slapped him again, just as hard as he punched Junho, who is on the floor in an injured state. I bent down to caress Junho’s bruised cheek. I’ve caused so much harm to this guy who I just met.

“Junho who is a stranger, and doesn’t know a thing about me, offered to make my night less lonely because of you. And you actually had the nerve to punch him.” I said seriously. Wooyoung pulls out his sorrowful face. It is not going to work on me this time.

“Cece-ah…” Wooyoung whispers. I must resist him.

“Please shut up, Jang Wooyoung. I don’t ever want to see your face in front of me again. I don’t want to listen to your lies, your sweet talks or your songs. I don’t want to even touch you. You disgust me. I don’t even want to be your best friend anymore. I want nothing to do with you. It’s over. Our relationship, our friendship, us will no longer exist after this moment. Goodbye, Jang Wooyoung. Don’t even try to contact me anymore, if you don’t want me to kill you. Junho-ssi, let’s go.” I cried. I’ve decided. There will be no Wooyoung and Cece after tonight. It’s not a sudden decision. It’s the result of many months of contemplating, or tolerating. My stress bubble has popped. Erupted in fact.

“Yah, is it because of him? You’re just as bad, chingu-ah.” Wooyoung spat. I really hope that it was his drunkenness talking there. Or at least his jealousy. He has never spoken to me like this before.

“ off, Jang Wooyoung-ssi. You have no right to say that to Cece-ssi. You don’t need to worry or pretend to worry about her anymore, because…I will care for her more than you ever did,” Junho assured as he stood up from the floor to face Wooyoung with a death stare. Did he mean it?

“Let’s go, Cece-ssi.” Junho said, while gripping onto my hand and dragging me out of the shop. I look at Wooyoung one last time, and I mentally bid goodbye to him with my eyes. I just hope that he understood my intentions.

I owe this guy. I owe Lee Junho with my life even. What he did back there is way beyond what a stranger, a friend or even family would do. I’m glad that he was there for me, but I feel forever indebted to him.

“Sorry for not getting your ice cream, Junho-ssi.” I apologised.

Junho turns around to face me. He totally ignores my apology.

“Whatever you do right now, don’t look back. Just look ahead. You can even look at my handsome face if you want. He’s not worth it, Cece-ssi. He’s the biggest bastard in the world and guess what? He’s going to have the most miserable and lonely Christmas because he just lost one gorgeous and warm-hearted girl who’s like any man’s treasure.” Junho comforted. I’m deeply touched by his words. Junho is good with his words but he says it like he means every single one of them.

“Thank you, Junho-ssi. I really appreciate it. You didn’t have to confront him… you could’ve just left and live on like how you lived yesterday. But you stayed and you even suffered from a punch. So I owe you one.” I acknowledged. In awe of how this perfect human being is, my tears begin to form again.

Junho leans closer towards me and uses his thumbs to wipe away my tears from the sides of my eyes. His soft touch is making me melt in my spot, making my tears to fall even harder instead of stopping. It took a half-lonely Christmas and losing my love of ten years to meet such a perfect man like Lee Junho. I guess I’m not completely unlucky. Junho is the one on the losing end of this Christmas. He met a shattered woman like me.

“Don’t worry about it. Just because we just met today, doesn’t mean that I won’t be the better man and help a broken princess,” Junho said as he tousled my bangs.

“With that favour, will you give me time to think about it?” Junho asked with a cheeky grin.

“As long as you like.” I said with a small smile.

“Good, that would be nice,”

“Hey, could you wait for me here for five minutes? Thanks, stay still okay?” Junho said as he squeezes my hand and bolts off.

I cannot help but to feel flustered at his touch. It Seems like I’ve known him for years. The closeness and excitement I’m feeling is really something new. I like this new feeling.

After two minutes, Junho returns and jumps in front of me, holding two ice cream cones in his hands. This is very nice of him. Everything he did for me tonight was nice.

“Since the fireworks will be starting soon, how about indulging these vanilla waffle cones while we wait?” Junho said brightly. He passed a cone to me. I gladly accepted it.

“Perfect, thank you, Junho-ssi.” I thanked.

We chose to sit on the grass hill behind a Haagen Dazs, not caring if Wooyoung had left already. Not caring that I am sitting here next to some stranger who is devastatingly handsome and polite. Not caring about my smudged eyeliner and mascara. All I wanted was to watch the fireworks in peace, with the guy beside me.

“So, Junho-ssi…I don’t know if it is okay to ask you but…” I asked, breaking our sudden silence.

“Go ahead.” Junho said with his tender gaze.

“Why were you spending Christmas alone? How about your family…your girlfriend?” I asked in the nicest way possible. I hope I’m not pushing things too far. But I guess after what he went through with my difficulties tonight, I think he’ll be all right with me asking.

“Well, both of my parents passed away when I was young, so I’m used to not having them around. My girlfriend…well ex-girlfriend had moved overseas two years ago. She’s now engaged to some filthy rich CEO of a mining company who is ten years older than her,” Junho explained. I let out an awkward gasp when he revealed his ex-girlfriend’s engagement. He must have been so terribly hurt. I wondered who would have helped him through those tough times? His parents are no longer with him, and he didn’t mention about other family. I just wished that I could be there for him like he was for me.

“So why did I decide to spend Christmas outside of my home this year? I wasn’t sure, but I guess I just couldn’t stay indoors, all by myself and with four walls forever. So I stepped outside to have fun, to enlighten myself. I guess it was the right decision…” Junho continued, as he stared into my eyes. I could see the hurt, the slight pain in his eyes. Sure, he seemed like a confident guy on the outside, but for the second time tonight, I saw how damaged he is on the inside. We are more alike than I thought.

“I’m sorry to hear that. I didn’t know—“ I quickly apologised, but Junho cut me off.

“Ah, it’s fine. Don’t stress over it. I’m already over everything. I’ve let go…and I want to take the chance to find happiness again. Do you get that feeling?” Junho assured. Did I feel that too? I did, especially after tonight.

“Yes, I do indeed.” I admitted.

With my response, Junho suddenly leans closer towards me. Dangerously closer. Is this happening?

The gap between him and I is just barely a toothpick worth. His eyes weren’t smiling, nor are they dark like a minute ago. They are passionate. His eyes trailed down to my lips before covering them with his own for a short, tender kiss. The touch of his lips is as smooth as velvet. I could still taste the vanilla from before. Junho slowly pulls away from me and avoids my eyes nervously.

“I-I am so sorry, Cece-ssi. I didn’t mean to kiss you like that. It was just in the spur of the moment. I’m sorry. We can just forget that this has ever happened. Please forgive me for my silly actions.” Junho mumbled. He’s just like a little, shy yet cute boy behind that manly and well-built body. He is pure and I liked it.

“Junho-ssi.” I breathed.

“Yes?”

Without waiting for a further response, I placed my lips onto his for another kiss. I kissed him softly and shyly, waiting for him. Shortly after, Junho started to dominate. He is kissing me with much more power and passion than our previous kiss. I opened my mouth slightly, allowing him access to explore the walls inside. I could taste the sweetness of vanilla bean lingering from the ice cream. Though the taste was much stronger. I reached for his neck as his hands moved slowly in a circular motion on my back, then to my waist. I can hear the fireworks popping loudly behind us. At the crackling sound, Junho pulls away from our heated encounter. I’m left disappointed and dazed. It hit me. We just kissed. Twice, in fact. So now I am one of those girls who celebrate Christmas by getting stood up, then breaking up with their long-term boyfriend and goes off kissing a guy they just met. I’m much classier than I thought.

“Look.” Junho said, as he intertwined his fingers with mine to point towards the fireworks, featuring Santa Claus and his reindeer sleigh, with ‘Merry Xmas’ spelt underneath. It’s unique and beautiful. A smile grew onto my face. This is what Christmas is all about. Watching enchanting fireworks with someone special to you. Who would’ve guessed that it would be a guy like Lee Junho? I sure didn’t.

“It’s beautiful.”

“Merry Christmas, Cece-ssi.” Junho said for the last time with a light kiss on my forehead.

“Merry Christmas to you too, Junho-ssi.” I said.

“Oh, I’ve got something for you.” Junho said. He pulls out a small wrapper out of his pocket.

“A candy cane?” I giggled. How childish of him.

“It sure is. I bought it earlier when I bought our ice creams. I just thought of your name, and it kind of reminded me of this.” Junho said, as he places the red and white candy cane in my hand. He really knows how to treat a girl well. He is one true gentleman.

“That’s really sweet of you, Junho-ssi. Thank you.” I wrap my arms around his neck for another hug. The feeling is breathtaking. Lee Junho is breathtaking.

“No problem. Would you like me to gift you a candy cane for next year’s Christmas too?” Junho said sincerely, showing me his gorgeous eye smile. He’s thinking about the future too? So, I’m not the only ambitious one.

“For every Christmas, Junho-ah.” I answered, with my brightest smile, before resting on Junho’s broad shoulder.

No one deserves to spend Christmas alone. It is a special day for people to celebrate with their loved ones. Making memories of joyous, exciting and maybe even miraculous times is why I enjoy December 25^th so much. I used to anticipate for big gifts, a day following the same ritual as the year before and aromatic purple tulips but nowadays, I prefer to receive sweet red and white candy canes.