It was one of those nights where it was so clear, you could look into the heart of the universe just by turning your face to the sky.

You can never understand just how old and gigantic the cosmos is until you’ve lain in the grass on one these nights, back flat on the earth and weeds tangling in your hair. No clouds, no airplanes, no telephone wires in the way—just a deep indigo expanse of velvet and thousands of glittering stars. In the presence of stars who have lived millions of years, your lifetime becomes a blink of an eye. You came into the world unknown to them and you will leave unknown to them, and they will continue hurtling through black space hundreds of billions of miles away without ever knowing that you were here. With starlight kissing your face and your head to your toes awash in night, you have the whole entire universe between your fingers, and they will never know you were here to admire them. It’s completely and utterly divine, if it’s anything.

Nights like those came only several times a year. You would never know when the next one would come.

So why the hell was I spending one of those rare nights in someone’s basement, surrounded by sweaty guys, makeup-caked girls, beer and bad party mixes?

“This ,” Jessica said.

“Tell me about it,” I muttered, even though I knew that she wasn’t hating the party for the reasons I was—those reasons being the girls shaking their asses like they were in a rap video, guys grinding on anything with s, the gym locker smell of sweat and perfume, and Kesha’s autotuned voice turned up so loud the couch was vibrating under my . Jessica only hated it because she couldn’t get in on the action, thanks to her newly broken leg. If it weren’t for her slip and fall on black ice two weeks ago, she would be on the dance floor, painting the town red like the rest of them.

“Gosh, what I would give to be out there,” Jessica murmured. “First real party since break and I have to sit out. Donghae will never notice me from over here.”

I rolled my eyes. “There will be more parties, Jess,” I said, around a sip of Sprite. Even though I couldn’t wait to get out of here, I could understand Jessica’s frustration. It seemed like half of Westwood High had shown up, and the only type of parties that would get this many people were the ones thrown by the varsity lacrosse captain, Kris Wu. Kris threw a party whenever he had an excuse to, and this party’s excuse was the kickoff of the spring sports season. All the spring JV and varsity teams were here—and then some. I even caught sight of some freshmen hopefuls in the crowd.

The only reason I got invites to these parties was (1 my now-in-college brother Suho used to be co-captain of the football team and 2) I was on varsity tennis. The only reason I went was to play chaperon to Tiffany, Jessica, and Yoona and make sure to bring them home safe. Usually it was just me sitting on the couch and counting down the hours until curfew at 12:30, but this time Jessica and her broken leg was there to keep me company while Tiffany and Yoona grinded it out.

I guess you could say I was the boring one, or the plain one, or maybe even the sane one—but any way you choose to put it, I was still a wildflower in a garden of roses when I was with them. It was always Tiffany, Yoona and Jessica who were the life of the party, and then there was Seohyun, who sat in the corner and drank Sprite instead of beer.

“Look, Tiffany and Yoona’s back,” Jessica said, jerking my arm to get my attention. I looked up in time for the two to squeeze onto the couch.

“You’ve got to get out there,” Yoona panted, taking a sip out of my Sprite. “Boy, that Kris knows how to throw a party.” Her shoulder length cut had stayed glossy and lustrous even though she