Not proof read...because I'm its too long and I'm lazy

Hope you like it though

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Siwon was dancing the tango by himself in his room, his arms stretched out in front of him, head tilted as he swung his body side to side, jiggling his hips like a worm doing an African war dance when Sungmin barged in, eyes wide, blond hair flying randomly. He stopped short when he took in the sight of Siwon, boogying to jazz.

“What are you doing?” he asked deadpanned, eyeing the tall handsome man as though he had lost his mind when he himself looked like a deranged bunny on the loose.

“Dancing?”

“Okay.”

…

…

…

…

…

“So…was there something that you needed hyung?”

“Oh! Yes! Did you see the new fanpics from our concert?”

No. Why?” Siwon asked as he eyed the man who looked like he was about to go into a frenzy. “Donghae. He is going to murder Donghae!”

“Wae?”

Sungmin shoved an iPad in his face, making him cross-eyed as he tried to see what the man was trying to show him, “Hyung, can you move back a little. I can’t see a thing!”

Sungmin clucked his tongue and Siwon heard something about stupid horse being stupid but he didn’t know of any horse and Sungmin had moved back and Siwon could finally see the iPad screen instead of being impaled by it.

“Oh Jesus!”

“Yes exactly!”

“Where is Donghae?”
 

“I don’t know. I was hoping you would know.”

Siwon pulled out his phone, fingers nimbly swiping the touchscreen and punching in random numbers that was his unlocking code and then dialing a number. He listened to the electronic voice telling him that the number was busy and he hung up, shrugging his shoulders as he looked at Sungmin.

“We have to find Donghae. It’s for his own safety.”

“Let’s call everyone and see who else is around, ne?”

Sungmin nodded, his own phone now out and started dialing numbers, “You take the one’s on this floor and I’ll contact the ones upstairs, “ he mumbled as he lifted his hand, phone now plastered against his ear, “AND DON’T SAY ANYTHING ON THE PHONE.”

That command may sound weird but seeing as who and what they are, this was normal. Stalker fans were like ninja piranhas, silent and deadly when tailing their biases, hungry and insatiable for new information. They did everything to know what the stars were up to, camping outside their dorm building day and night, causing accidents, holding up traffic, tapping their phones, hacking their emails. It was horrible and extremely terrifying to the innocent boys when they had first become an idol.

They had learnt their lesson the hard way when Leeteuk was followed to his girlfriends place and almost got her murdered by a crazed fan who had found out where he was going by tapping his phone. SME had hushed it up by paying off the girlfriend and institutionalizing the fan, and SJ had come up with a code. It was actually Heechul who had come up with it while watching Yesung playing with his turtle and they all agreed to it. It was simple, yet brilliant.

“And DON’T call him” Siwon nodded his head frantically, eyes wide with fear, acknowledging Sungmin’s warning like the bible because he himself had suffered from his wrath many times over and he wouldn’t wish such a fate on little innocent Donghae.

“Yeoboseyo,” came a groggy voice from the other side of the line and Sungmin quickly uttered, “The turtle is hungry.”

Beside him Siwon bellowed the same words, hands flying dramatically as if he was reenacting a hungry turtle and if the situation were not so grave, he would have laughed at the thespian man who had now shoved almost his whole fist up his mouth.

“Are you on crack?”

“Hyung. The turtle is hungry!!”

“So? Feed it or something”

“THE TURTLE IS HUNNNNNNNGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRY!”

“Oh. Right. I’m coming.”

“Heechul is coming”

“So is Ryeowook” Siwon whispered beside him as he dialed yet another number

Sungmin too dialed another number and placed the phone to his ear, “Yeoboseyooooooooo~~~ Hyungie…hihi,” came a singsong voice from the other line and Sungmin almost cried as he thought that maybe this was the last time he would here that voice.

“The turtle is hungry.”

“Eh? Turtle? Yesung hyung’s turtle is hungry?”

“Donghae-ah…THE TURTLE IS HUNGRY!!!!!”

“How come no one fed Yesung hyungs turtle?”

“DONGHAE-AH~”

“Neh hyung?”

“……Just come home okay?”

“To feed the turtle? Okay hyung. I just have to do something before coming. Kyuhyun was calling me too.”

“NO! Don’t go to Kyuhyun! Just come home! Come to the dorm. The turtle is hungry you damn fish! It’s hungry! COME HOME!”

“Okay. OKAY! I’m coming! No need to yell hyung.”

Sungmin sighed as he disconnected the call, feeling extremely exhausted after that small conversation.

“Hyung. Yesung and Hyukjae hyung are also coming. I’m guessing that was Donghae,” Sungmin nodded tiredly, “should I call Kangin hyung?” Sungmin again nodded as he once again pulled the phone nearer and dialed their leader’s number.

“The turtle is hungry.” “Where are you?” “Dorm” “I’m coming. Stay there.” “Okay.”

~

The members all sat on the floor, circling the coffee table where Sungmin’s sleek white iPad was laying along with a batch of lettuce that Donghae had bought.

“He is going to kill him.” Leeteuk muttered as he stared at the picture displayed on the screen. “He is going to kill him and we won’t be able to do anything about it.”

“The picture is blurry.”

“We can still see the face.”

“And everyone knows who those abs belong to.”

“Why did you do it Donghae? Why?” Donghae pouted as Leeteuk asked, his voice stern and a little hysterical. “It looked like waffles and I was really hungry hyung.”

“Damnit Donghae. I told you to tone it down! You barely survived after the SJ-M comeback this year! What are you going to tell him when he finds you?”

“I don’t know…” Donghae sulked, bottom lip poking out and watery eyes wide and looking even more pitiful than a kicked puppy, “but the management wants us to do fanservice,” he whined, looking at all the members one by one while flailing his arms and throwing his feet like the manchild that he was.

“Yes! Fanservice! Not THIS!! This is !!!”

Everyone stared at Leeteuk who was gulping down air like he was being suffocated. Donghae pouted furiously and sulked more, his head hanging down and chin quivering slightly at being scolded. “I didn’t mean to. I was hungry,” he whined in a soft low voice and Hyukjae who was sitting next to the sulking fish hugged him, trying to comfort the tearing boy.

“You are not blame free too Hyukjae!”

“What did I do? I was just putting on a show! We are supposed to take off out t-shirt for Rockstar!”

“Who told you to make you abs look like waffles.”

“Hyung! All abs look like waffles!!!!!! Or washboards! They are supposed to look that way!”

“Do you know how royally screwed we all will be because of your stupid abs?”

“Your abs are waffle-y too!!!!”

“This isn’t about my abs! It’s about yours!”

Siwon who had been so far sitting there all quiet, head moving from one side to the other as the leader and Hyukjae argued, like a dog following the tennis ball during a game, when he heard the beep come from the door. It could be no one else except him and perhaps their managers.

He coughed, trying to get their attention without arousing suspicion from whoever it was at the door. Seeing as he wasn’t getting any attention he coughed again, nearly hacking up a lung as he did so.

“What?” chorused the members and Siwon almost shivered under the united stares of the members. He pointed at the doorway which could be heard opening slowly and then there was sounds of shuffling and shoes being taken off.

And then there was a frenzy. Members jumped to their feet and vaulted in all directions, some sitting on the couch while others heading for the bedroom or the bathroom. Yesung dragged Donghae by the hair to his own room and shoved him in before locking the door from the inside. Sungmin and Ryeowook ran to the kitchen banging pots and pans loudly and spilling the entire cutlery on the dish drainer in their