It was because of the phrase ‘Let’s break up’ from her voice through made her life gloomy. True enough, she was the one saying those harmful words, but, there was a reason that made her say those words which had hurt him as well as her ever since… That ‘him’ replied her with a trail of words that never stopped repeating in her brain like a broken recorder and those words were ‘It was because of him, you broke up with me right?’

 

She wanted to reply to him then, telling him the reason, but no, she did not reply to him, the male with deep eye bags which looked like a panda. Instead, she dragged the Mohawk hair male and walked away from him, the panda guy.

 

She was afraid that she might hurt him in a way whereby it’s more painful way, more heart aching, as she vanished from the surface of the earth. She sighed as she leaned backwards on the hospital bed. She wished that if only she did not have that brain tumour of hers, she would not suffer the pain with him, without her panda guy. It was because of that, she left him, hurting him by hanging out with that Mohawk hair guy, Youngbae. She could not actually imagine that panda guy, Seungri to cry at her grave. Though she knew that she would not die instantly, she does not want him to suffer as she started to loss her beautiful memories that she shared with Seungri…

 

Another stream of tears streamed down her cheeks with her eyes shut as she flashed this scene in her mind. True, she was that cat-eyed lady who through those hurtful words ‘Let’s break up’ to Seungri in which in jaw landed on the ground in disbelief. Though they both truly love each other, words break them apart.

 

She shook her head and opened her shut eyes. She then fidgeted with her mobile phone messages, emails, all her messaging applications, wishing that he would had contacted her. She gave out a loud sigh. It was a good thing as it had been two months; yet, Seungri had yet to found out about the cat-eyed lady health condition. She wanted to keep it a secret from everyone but well, she failed as Youngbae had found out as he was her best friend after all.

 

Once again, Chaerin was sent to the hospital again. Her stay in the hospital began to increase, every time she fainted. “Chae, are you alright?” A panting male voice entered her thoughts. She then saw the Mohawk guy, Youngbae. Youngbae was sweaty and he seemed to run all the way here. Chaerin nodded her head, not wanting to worry him and be a burden. However, Youngbae knew Chaerin too well, he immediately saw through her lie in which he responded her, “Lee Chaerin no, you are not alright… I know that you are thinking about him again. You know what; you should tell him the truth.”

 

Immediately, Chaerin responded with as she shook her head and pleaded him, “No, Bae oppa… He shall not know and I shall not be his burden…” Another stream of tears slipped out of her cat eyes as she grabbed Youngbae’s arm tightly. Youngbae pulled her close into an embrace and patted her back gently as he assured her, “Chaerin, I respect your decision and I would not tell him…”

 

Chaerin shut her eyes tight while she was in his embrace. Her thoughts were on the first time she heard the three words she wanted which were none other ‘I love you’. The first time when those words were presented to her were none other from the panda guy she loved, Seungri. That crazy panda guy said those words to her at a place whereby she feared the most, the haunted house in an amusement park.

 

She remembered clearly that she protested, “Seungri, I don’t want to enter that haunted house!” Seungri just smiled and carried Chaerin in the bridal style as he walked towards the haunted house. “Let me down you rat!” Chaerin exclaimed as she hit his chest. Seungri ignored her and continued walking until they were in the haunted house, he playfully placed her down on the floor in which she shouted as she shut her eyes in fear, “No, why you put me down!” “Say ‘I love you’” Seungri teased Chaerin. Without a second thought, Chaerin said, “I love you!” With that Seungri carried Chaerin in the bridal style. Before, he took another step, he whispered in Chaerin’s ears, “I love you… From this moment onwards, you are mine and I am yours.” Chaerin eyes were shut with fear but her lips were opened as she smiled a foolish smile. True, Chaerin hated Seungri that he dragged her into the haunted house but she loved the fact that she heard the words ‘I love you’ from Seungri, the guy she loved.

 

Chaerin opened her eyes, bringing herself back to reality with more tears after finding out that the one that patted her was Youngbae and not Seungri. Youngbae continued to pat Chaerin’s back continuously and whispered in her ears like how Seungri did, “Hush, Chaerin, hush…” The comforting method was the similar but Chaerin did not feel convinced as Seungri way of comforting her was more comfortable… However, Chaerin nodded her head sniffling her tears. However, tears controlled her which made her to cry continuously. 

 

When Chaerin stopped crying, Youngbae started another topic, “Chae, you should go for therapy…” Chaerin shook her head violently and faked a smile to Youngbae, “See Bae oppa, I am alright!” Youngbae said directly, “Yeah, you are alright… If you were alright, you would not be lying here. If you were alright, you would not paste that fake smile on your face. If you are alright, you would not be crying here because you mean him.”

 

Silence engulfed the room. Youngbae hit the bull-eyes already. She knew what he meant, he knew who the ‘him’, he was referring to. “Bae, I don’t trust those therapies, they were the one which made my dad suffered more. It is costly but I have the kind of money to afford it, but no I don’t want… You are right Youngbae, I am not alright; not alright at all. I do miss him a lot, but I don’t wish to make him suffer…” 

 

“Lee Chaerin, stop thinking that by not telling him the reality you are facing, he would not suffer! He suffered more instead! Ever since the day when you broke up with him, he had not been himself… He had been drinking ever since then and he does not look human, he does not look like Seungri or Lee Seunghyun… He looked like a beggar! He looked pathetic!” Youngbae said.

 

“Youngbae… What you want me to do? Do you think that he will forgive me? I don’t think so… I know he is a stubborn creature…” Chaerin replied with tears in her eyes.

 

“I know you had been writing diary entries to make you remember things… But other than that, I also know that you do write letters which meant for him. I know you wanted me to give it to him after you disappear, but please… Let me give it to him now and pull him back to reality!” Youngbae said.

 

“Arraso, Bae oppa…” Chaerin said and passed Youngbae one of those letters which meant to give Seungri.

 

Youngbae left Chaerin after she fell into a deep slumber and he went to Seungri’s apartment. “Seunghyun, stop drinking!” Youngbae shouted as he snatched the can of beer away from him.  Youngbae could clearly see that Seungri’s apartment was in a mess. Clothes were scattered all around. Empty cup of cup noodles were all around his house.

 

“Why are you here hyung?” Seungri asked Youngbae.

 

“I am glad that you still recognised me. I am here today because Chaerin wanted me to pass you a letter,” Youngbae said. 

 

“What that woman wants? Why are you helping her to pass things to me when she already chose you! Why? I don’t understand you people!” Seungri exclaimed.

 

“Ri, I am not the reason why Chaerin broke up with you… The reason is in the letter,” Youngbae said and passed Seungri the letter before he walked off.

 

After Youngbae left, Seungri opened the envelope that contained Chaerin’s letter. He read the letter.

‘Dear Baby Ri, 

I am sorry… Sorry for breaking up with you though deep down in my heart, I don’t wish to. Okay I thing you may be thinking that I am talking nonsense; I might be saying those because I want you back. You are wrong, I am not talking nonsense, but you are right, I want you back. Recently, I found out that I had been suffering the terminal stage of brain tumour.  I don’t wish to be a burden on you so I decided that breaking up is the best decision because I love you.

From your Baby Rinnie’

 

“Chaerin, Seungri is coming over already…” Youngbae said to Chaerin which was sleeping soundly.   

 

 

The sun rose and it was morning again. Chaerin woke up. She saw no one else but Seungri… “Seungri?” Chaerin asked in which Seungri nodded his head and embraced her tightly. 

 

Ever since that day, Chaerin stayed at Seungri’s house… Seungri became the old him again, the guy who would listen to whatever Chaerin said. Chaerin on the other hand was still as stubborn as ever, she did not wanted to get the therapy at all no matter how both Youngbae and Seungri tell her to but she was not convinced. Everything was perfect until, the day Chaerin did not wake up from her sleep. Seungri supposed that it was okay for her to sleep a bit more but he didn’t expect that she did not wake up the next day. Seungri sent her to the hospital. For the next month, Chaerin was in coma and every day, both Seungri and Youngbae will be there beside her in case she woke up.

 

“Ri! Chae eyes are opening!” Youngbae exclaimed at the sight upon seeing Chaerin’s eyes opening. He was squealing in joy in his mind but no, he did not expressed out. He composed himself because he was not her lover nor was he a teenage girl. Sometimes, Youngbae wished that he did not hide the fact that he loved her as a male. But no, he hid the fact because he knew that Seungri liked her when he wanted to confess to Chaerin his love for her. Since, he had hid it once, he intended to hide it forever from everyone and burry that feelings deep down in his heart.

 

Seungri ran to the side of Chaerin’s bed and he waved at her. “Who are you?” Chaerin said. Tears streamed down from Seungri eyes as Chaerin already did not recognised him… Youngbae walked over smiled as Chaerin in which Chaerin blinked at him as she responded, “Who are you?” Youngbae did not cry but his face turned bitter.

 

 On that same day, Chaerin said her last words, “I am sorry if I failed to recognise you. But whoever you were to me, I will still love you in whatever ways…” Before the system beeped as Chaerin’s heart stopped beating.

 

That night after Seungri went home, he sighed after he lied down on his bed upon seeing his house was nothing but empty with darkness... There was nothing in his house, in his room but loneliness. Moreover, there weren't a sound other than those from the fan and the vehicles downstairs, nothing was there but silence.

 

‘If only, she didn’t die…’ He thought. He personally knew that if she did not die of that sickness… They would have a happy ending…

 

Chaerin, Seungri and Youngbae, these three friends, all of them suffered pain in different ways. Chaerin suffered pain as she was physically, mentally tortured by the brain tumour in her brain while knowing the fact; she was also emotionally tortured as she decided to keep it mum from Seungri but Youngbae helped her cure her emotional tortures by telling Seungri the truth. Seungri on the other hand was emotionally torture before and after knowing that Chaerin was suffering from brain tumour. He suffered emotional torture before he knew Chaerin’s secret as he guessed Chaerin’s reason for breaking up with him. After knowing Chaerin’s reason for breaking up with him, his heart ached as Chaerin health condition worsens day after day and after she died. As for Youngbae, he suffered emotional tortures as he gave Seungri the chance to confess to Chaerin, patch up with Chaerin. Youngbae gave away the lady whom he loved away to his best friend and suffered the emotion torture all alone and kept the fact that he liked Chaerin from the surface of the earth…