Yuri took a sip of her morning coffee as she was accompanied by the sound of the calm rain pouring outside her apartment. She allowed the bittersweet liquid linger on her tongue for a quick moment before gulping it down on and knocking the back of her head lightly back on her seat, frustrated… as usual; but most importantly, heartbroken.

 

 

I want to forget you…

She muttered; tears clouding her vision once again, her grip on the mug tightened with anger.

 

 

She placed her mug on the coffee table before she slouched her back lazily, her bottom sliding slightly away from the couch with her head tilted upwards to stare at her living room ceiling.

 

 

She covered her eyes with her right arm, darkening her vision.

What have I done to deserve this?

She spoke in a mad and loud tone; a tear escaping her eye.

 

 

It’s been two months, Yul… Pull your together.

She spoke to herself as more tears flowed down her tan cheeks.

 

 

She wanted to forget her  looks...

 

Her  eyes...

 

Her  smile...

 

Her  voice...

 

Her  smell...

 

Her  touch...

 

Her  taste...

 

Everything…

 

But how could she, if she was the only thing in the whole universe that made sense to her? Without her… she was lost.

 

 

—o—

 

 

Yuri grabbed her wrist tight before she could ever leave her presence.

Don’t do this to me!

Yuri yelled; her grip on the latter’s wrist tightening.

 

 

She was answered with bloodshot eyes and an icy cold glare.

Yuri gritted her teeth shortly as she sighed; the sound of her uneasy breathing echoing in the apartment.

 

 

W-Wae?

Yuri asked the latter; her voice trembling as she still tried her best to hold back her tears.

 

 

Because…I’m not happy with you anymore…

She finally answered poorly; her eyes full of pity.

 

 

Yuri’s grip weakened.

Her face turned pale.

But most importantly, her heart weakened.

 

 

She lowered her hand to fall back to her side as she bowed her head; her eyes full of sorrow and pain. She couldn’t even bare the sight of her leaving. She heard the sound of her footsteps walking away from her and a loud slam on the door that wrapped up their relationship.

 

 

—o—

 

 

Yuri grabbed her half-filled mug from the coffee table angrily before throwing it to the wall in front of her at the thought of that scenario repeating itself in her mind more than once; more than she could handle.

 

 

She blankly stared at her now shattered, baby blue-colored mug lying on her wooden floorboards along with the creamy brown coffee that stretched out and flowed slowly away from her mug. It was perfectly broken… like her.

 

 

Her lips trembled with agony with more tears staining her face. Just like her coffee mug, she cracked. She slowly stood up from her couch and walked towards her broken mug, kneeling in front of it, continuing to stare blankly at the shattered glass. She took a piece of her broken mug, rubbing its sharp edges on the tips of her fingers and held it against her neck.

 

 

She finally lost it.

 

 

She moved the sharp object gently along her skin, trying to look for her pulse point. She suddenly remembered when she kissed her on that spot on a summer night. Yuri just chuckled off the memory, imagining that her broken mug piece was, and insanely, her lips.

 

 

M-Maybe if I cut it deep enough… the pain will go away; maybe you’ll finally find your way back to me again…and maybe, just maybe, for the first time in a while, I’d finally be at peace with myself after this insanity you’ve put me through…

 

 

She sliced her neck lightly, feeling numb rather than hurt. She rubbed her fingertips lightly over her cut and pulled it back for her eyes to see…

 

 

Jessica…

She whimpered.

 

 

Her fingertips were red…very red.

But for her…

 

 

It’s not red enough…