As Jongin enters the room he shares with Kyungsoo, the same sight he sees every night welcomes him. The only light in the room is a little nightlight between Kyungsoo’s and Jongin’s beds, but it’s enough to illuminate Kyungsoo’s sleeping figure and enough so that Jongin can clearly see the glistening tears on the cheeks of the older man.

The young man sighs, sadness and concern filling his eyes as he sees the heartbreaking sight of the man he likes, crying and sobbing. He was used to it though, every night when he entered the room, he could see the exact same thing, sometimes also it woke him up during night. Jongin had assumed Kyungsoo had bad dreams and probably the same every night. He never talked to him about it though, the older didn’t even know he saw him cry and he knew the other probably wouldn’t like the thought of someone seeing him cry. So Jongin wouldn’t talk, he wouldn’t ask why Kyungsoo was crying, or what bothered him, he would just be there.

The first times it happened, he decided to do just as if he never saw anything, he would bury his face in his pillow and try to convince himself that his crush wasn’t crying right behind him. After some nights though, he wasn’t able to do that anymore. He decided to join the older in his bed. He would hold him tight in his embrace telling him everything was alright and he would always cup Kyungsoo’s face with his hand, admiring the other’s beautiful face – even when he was crying he managed to look stunningly beautiful – and with his thumbs he would wipe the tears away from the other’s eyes. After Jongin had done it so many times, he noticed some things, like how Kyungsoo would often cling to him like he never wanted him to go, or how the smaller man would calm down faster if Jongin said that he was there and that he wouldn’t go and how Kyungsoo would often whisper Jongin’s name between sobs while clinging to the other’s shirt desperately.

So tonight Jongin did just like usual, he quietly entered the room and closed the door just as quietly. He then slipped in the older’s bed, wrapping his arms around the smaller man. He moved his hand up and down the other’s back soothingly and heard the sobs getting a little quieter. He murmured comforting things to the other and after saying a few times that he was there and he wouldn’t go, the sleeping man’s breath became steadier and his tears stopped falling. Jongin then took the other’s face in his hands and admired it. Oh how badly he would like to get a taste of these plump red lips. He thought about giving it a try since the other man was asleep but then he realized he didn’t really want a taste of it if Kyungsoo was sleeping. Because if it didn’t mean anything to the other, then how could it mean something to Jongin ? The latter sighed and brushed the tears off the man’s cheeks and left a little kiss on the place where there were tears seconds ago. He then got up unwillingly and walked to his own bed, letting himself fall on the soft mattress and, after he wondered why his owl plushie wasn’t in his bed, he closed his eyes, already falling in slumber.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After a tiring day of practice, Kyungsoo went to bed early. He was exhausted and after taking a hot shower, the best idea he could think of right now was sleep. So he went in his and Jongin’s room, he changed in his pajamas and he went to his bed, took Jongin’s cute plushie from under the sheets and brought it to its owner’s bed. He then took a shirt lying on the floor beside Jongin’s bed and brought it to his bed instead of the plushie. It was a habit Kyungsoo had; he would take an object that belongs to Jongin so he could have his scent while he sleeps. Yes, Kyungsoo is aware that it can seem weird and he might seem obsessed with Jongin but... If someone accused him of the latter, he wouldn’t really deny it, he himself was aware that he might be a little obsessed. But that’s just what we call love, isn’t it?

Kyungsoo hopped in his bed and lay there comfortably, inhaling the shirt’s scent, Jongin’s scent. He thought it was weird how he would wake up some mornings and his bed seemed to smell even more than the object – in this case a shirt – itself. It was as if his bed was impregnated with Jongin’s scent, and Kyungsoo wasn’t going to complain.

After closing his eyes and turning the lights off, thoughts of Jongin started filling Kyungsoo’s mind. It wasn’t something new though; Jongin was always in Kyungsoo’s thoughts. And sometimes maybe it wasn’t the best for the older man. Since Jongin always filled his mind, Kyungsoo found himself dreaming of the younger every night. But unfortunately, it was only so seldom that Kyungsoo’s dreams were happy. Kyungsoo was always joyful and smiling during the day, his smile would never disappear on his lips. But it seemed that every night, it was his bad thoughts that dominated his mind. And since he was thinking of Jongin, it was bad thoughts about Jongin and also what you could probably call Kyungsoo’s biggest fears. His dreams were always implying Jongin leaving him. The most often, it would be about Kyungsoo finally gaining the courage and confessing to Jongin but the other would reject him in the worst ways possible. Sometimes also, Jongin would just leave him, saying he was bored with him and he had already found a best friend to replace him. And in the worst dreams, Jongin would leave, but not intentionally, he would just die. And these were the night when the most tears were shed.

After a while of just lying there in his bed, Kyungsoo fell asleep, hoping he wouldn’t have too much of a bad dream.

Kyungsoo was happy and nervous because today was THE day. Baekhyun had finally convinced him in revealing his feelings to Jongin and he was gonna do that right when Jongin would get out of his shower. Kyungsoo was smiling nervously, sitting on the sofa and watching impatiently for the bathroom door to open. He finally saw the handle turn and the door opened to reveal the most beautiful man in Kyungsoo’s eyes. Kyungsoo’s stomach seemed to flip and he wasn’t sure if it was the nervousness or just because Jongin looked so damn y with his damp hair.

Jongin smiled when he saw him, ‘’Hey Kyungie~’’

Kyungsoo felt something form in his throat, as if trying to prevent him to speak and now he was sure it was nervousness taking over his body. He didn’t back up though, he would do it.

‘’Hey Jongin! I-I had someth-thing to tell you.’’ Jongin looked at him with these cute curious eyes. ‘’And what is it?’’

‘’Well I’’ Kyungsoo swallowed before being able to continue his sentence, ‘’I r-really like you… more than a friend.’’ Kyungsoo looked at his lap and wanted to slap himself for confessing so clumsily.

After the never ending silence, he looked up to see his best friend’s face and all he saw was disgust and hatred, disgust and hatred toward him, and that was enough of an answer to Kyungsoo, he went crying in his bed. But after a while, he felt Jongin’s warm body against him whispering comforting words and it just felt so real, that Kyungsoo stopped crying.

In the morning, when Kyungsoo woke up, he felt the dry tears on his cheeks and he cursed himself for being so weak. But then he also smelled Jongin’s scent on his sheets and on his mattress and he remembered how real it had felt when Jongin hugged him in his dream. Oh how he wished it would really happen one day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kyungsoo had decided to go to bed later than usual tonight so that he could stay with Jongin to watch a movie. Kyungsoo didn’t even know how it happened, he just remembered the words coming out of Jongin’s mouth: ‘You are such a good best friend, Kyungie!’

Even happy words like these had the power to pull Kyungsoo down and he told his ‘bestfriend’ that he was too sleepy and he was going to sleep. It was just a lie though; he wasn’t going to sleep, he was going to curl up in his bed and cry. Cry because the ‘best friend’ label was always so painful to hear. Because even though he was close to Jongin, he was never close enough. And he thought he was selfish to think this way; after all, he was the closest person to Jongin, why couldn’t he be satisfied with that? But no, it wasn’t enough to Kyungsoo because Kyungsoo wanted more, he needed more. But even though he was always taking good care of Jongin, even though he was the closest person to him.. At the end of the day, Kyungsoo was nothing more than his best friend. And that made him cry silently while inhaling the scent of Jongin on the younger’s shirt. He wasn’t sure if it comforted him or if it made him cry harder but he didn’t care because he needed Jongin’s presence right now. And just as the thought crossed his mind, he felt his mattress move and he realize someone was getting in his bed. He didn’t want the other to know he was awake so he just kept on crying – it’s not like he would have been able to stop anyway. He felt strong arms embrace him and he instantly relaxed a little. And that’s when Jongin started murmuring comforting words in his ear and that’s also when Kyungsoo decided he was most likely dreaming. But it wasn’t a dream and deep within himself he knew it well enough. It was Jongin comforting him, and it felt so much like when he was dreaming that he realized it wasn’t the first time the younger came to wipe his tears. It felt just as if the other knew exactly what he was doing, like it was natural to take care of Kyungsoo in such a state.

He hadn’t even realized he had stopped crying until he felt warm hands on his face and a kiss being pressed on his forehead, followed by a ‘Goodnight my lovely Kyungie’. And then the warmth was going away, Jongin was going away and he was leaving Kyungsoo there, when he had just whispered in his ears that he wasn’t going to leave him. So Kyungsoo did what he could, he grabbed Jongin’s shirt and said weakly, ‘’I thought you said you wouldn’t go away.’’ And Jongin immediately froze at the voice. Kyungsoo wasn’t sleeping. The thought difficultly made its way to Jongin’s brain. But when he heard Kyungsoo swallowing a sob, he directly went back to him. He gained back his previous position beside Kyungsoo wrapped his arm around the sobbing man again. ‘’Shhhh, stop crying, it’ll be alright, I’m here.’’

At this Kyungsoo only scoffed, ‘’You’re here but you’re gonna go as soon as I fall asleep, right? Is this what you’ve been doing for some days ?’’

Jongin cleared his throat, ‘’Well actually I’ve been doing this for more than a month now… But I’m sorry, you’re probably disgusted of knowing I’ve been hugging you in your bed while you were asleep and I have to admit that said like that, it doesn’t sound so right… I’m sorry, I just wasn’t able to watch you cry without doing anything.’’ Jongin said the last sentence a little more quietly. Kyungsoo’s eyes widen cutely and then he just laughed. He freaking laughed and Jongin didn’t understand what he had said that could be funny.

Kyungso finally said something, ‘’So you’re the one who wipe my tears away every night, but you’re also the reason why I cry. How ironic.’’

And now it’s Jongin’s time to widen his eyes. ‘’I’m the one who makes you cry?! Oh my God, Kyungie I don’t have any idea of what I’ve done but it must be so bad for you to cry every night. I am so so so sorry!’’ Kyungsoo chuckled softly, ‘’Well it isn’t really your fault Jongin. It’s not your fault if you’re so handsome, so cute and so y. So kind, so funny and so smiling. So hot, so attractive and so beautiful, so you. It isn’t your fault that you make my heart beat faster and butterflies in my tummy appear. It’s not your fault that you make me feel so happy and weird but sometimes you make me feel sad too because I’m nothing special to you. It’s not your fault that I fell in love with you. Or maybe it was your fault, but I’ll blame it all on love. Because that’s what it is.’’

Jongin’s mouth fell open and he didn’t know what to say. All these words Kyungsoo had said to him, they were even better than in his dreams. Kyungsoo’s confession was way cuter than the 50 times or more he had imagined it to be.

And now he couldn’t hold it back, he did what he wanted to do for so long and locked his lips with Kyungsoo’s. It was a tender and gentle kiss, a kiss filled with love and unspoken words, a kiss that had Kyungsoo’s and Jongin’s hearts beat in synch. And when they separated, out of breath, that’s a genuinely loving smile that appeared on both of their pair of lips. Jongin’s eyes were sparkling with love – his emotions had always shown in his eyes – and he said these words he repeated so often in his mind, ‘’Kyungie, I love you.’’

And they shared another love-filled kiss before letting go. Kyungsoo was resting in Jongin’s arms and they stayed like that for a while before Jongin asked what he really wanted to, ‘’But Kyungsoo.. What were your dreams really about?’’ Kyungsoo slightly turned his head to look at his lover and smiled sadly, ‘’It was mostly rejection; I would confess and you would hate me. Or you would just get bored of me. A-and sometimes… you died. And today I wasn’t sleeping but… the ‘best friend’ label was really painful to me.’’ Kyungsoo admitted while searching for a reaction in the other’s eyes.

The younger boy looked at him, ‘’Then now you can stop having those bad dreams because you already confessed and we surely aren’t only best friends anymore. And me hating you and getting bored of you is the most stupid thing I’ve ever heard! If you knew how addicted to you I am, Do Kyungsoo. And I promised I won’t leave you. Never. I’ll stay by your side. You’ll fall asleep in my arms and when you will wake up I will still be here. I promise I’ll make your tears disappear and they will never come back.’’

As if to seal the promise, Jongin leaned to Kyungsoo’s face and left lots of lights kisses everywhere – on his nose, on his cheeks, on his forehead, on his chin, on his temples – and then ended with a kiss on the lips, the most passionate of the three they shared. And they fell asleep peacefully, Kyungsoo in Jongin’s embrace, promising to never let go.

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Finally wrote it! :D

Please don't hate me if it's bad! I really don't have any idea if I failed or if it was kinda fluffy at the end? And angsty at the beginning? 

Please tell me what you think of it!! =D

Thank you for reading~ ♥