“Do Kyungsoo.”

 

Jongin looks up from his daze at the call of the name he grew to know. A name that he kept deep inside his heart. His eyes scans the rows ahead until they set on the short male. He watches him walk toward the stage, and scrutinizes his best friend. Kyungsoo’s face looks slimmer, dark circles under his eyes, and his eyes, themselves, look slightly puffy.

 

He remembers the day they met like it was just yesterday. Meeting Kyungsoo had changed his life completely.

 

It was the first day of high school when Jongin first met Do Kyungsoo.

 

“YA! Byun Baekhyun! Give me back my notebook!” Jongin hollers down the hall, chasing after the blonde boy. He watches his target run around the corner and misses a tall figure running right past him.

 

“Park Chanyeol, I swear, when I get my hands on you, you are dead meat!” another voice screams from around the corner.

 

Just as Jongin is about to turn the corner, he smacks himself right into someone. They both fall onto their bottoms, yelping in pain. Jongin sits up and looks up to see a boy with brown hair rubbing at a reddening spot on his forehead. Jongin chuckles a little at the image. Upon hearing his laughter, the boy looks up at him with large doe eyes. Jongin’s breath hitches as their eyes meet. Before a word could escape their mouths, they were interrupted by a figure looming over them.

 

“You two are in big trouble! No running in the halls!”

 

Jongin’s knees were hurting from kneeling on the ground; his shoulders slumped over from tiredness.

 

“Back straight, Kim.”

 

Jongin groans and straightens his back. He could swear the teacher had eyes on his forehead. How is he even seeing anything from behind the newspaper, anyway. Jongin hears a small snicker from his left. He turns his head and scowls at the smaller male.

 

“Do Kyungsoo, your arms are dropping.”

 

Do Kyungsoo. That was his name.

 

At the mention of his name, his face goes blank and raises his arms higher. Now, it was Jongin’s turn to snicker. Kyungsoo whips his head toward Jongin and glares. Jongin smirks back, eyes staring mischievously into his, as if daring him to make another response. The stare down continues for a moment before they both burst into laughter, forgetting that they were currently stuck doing a punishment. Least to say, they both spent an even longer time in detention than necessary.

 

From that moment on, Jongin and Kyungsoo were always together, joined at the hips, the best of best friends.

 

It was during second year when Jongin realized he had fallen in love with Do Kyungsoo completely. It came too sudden and there was no going back.

 

“Baby don’t cry tonight after the darkness passes

Baby don’t cry tonight it’ll become as if it never happened

You’re not the one who will turn into foam, something you never should’ve known

So baby don’t cry cry my love will protect you”

 

Standing at the threshold of Kyungsoo’s bedroom door was Jongin, leaning against the opening. He had been mesmerized by Kyungsoo’s sweet, chocolate voice. When the song had ended, Jongin clapped excessively. Kyungsoo turned toward his door with a very shocked expression on his face, cheeks turning a bright pink.

 

“That was beautiful, Kyungsoo hyung.”

 

Kyungsoo, still in shock, rambled something along the lines of, “When did you get here? You weren’t supposed to come until later. It wasn’t even anything. I-- I -- you weren’t supposed to hear that!”

 

Defeated, Kyungsoo covers his face with his hands, embarrassed.

 

“Why? It was beautiful. You should join the talent show,” Jongin says, while walking toward the slumped figure at the desk.

 

He removed Kyungsoo’s hands from his face and bends down to come face to face with the doe-eyed boy.

 

He grips Kyungsoo’s wrists and says, “I’m serious. Your voice is beautiful, hyung.”

 

Kyungsoo stares into Jongin’s eyes for any hint of ridicule, but only sees sincerity.

 

“I can’t. I have stage fright.”

 

Jongin lets go of his hands and places his palms against Kyungsoo’s chubby cheeks. Applying pressure until he cracks into a smile at seeing Kyungsoo’s distorted face.

 

“That’s why you have me, hyung.”

 

There were three more days before the school’s talent show, and Kyungsoo had been practicing, with the help of Jongin, for the past two weeks. It had taken at least four days before Kyungsoo could sing properly in front of Jongin; he’s not sure if he’s ever going to be ready to sing in front of a hundred people.

 

He was sitting on the edge of the stage, slumped over from exhaustion and frustration.

 

“I can’t do it, Jongin.”

 

“Yes you can. And, you will,” Jongin encourages.

 

He walks over to Kyungsoo and urges him to get off the stage. “Come here.”

 

He pulls Kyungsoo’s hand and leads him to a chair in front of the stage. Kyungsoo sits down and stares up at Jongin curiously.

 

“Wait here.” With that, he leaves to the back of the stage.

 

Jongin reappears again, but on the stage. Kyungsoo tilts his head to the side, waiting for Jongin to do something. He finds himself watching Jongin’s sneakers squeak across the floor as he steps into a twirl. He watches him sway and move with such delicate balance. Kyungsoo is stunned. He never knew Jongin could dance. And, Jongin was good, too. No. He was the definition of a dancer.  

 

As soon as Jongin ends his dance routine with a pose, Kyungsoo stands up and claps like a proud parent.

 

“Wow. That was amazing, Jongin!”

 

“Yeah?” he asks, and he steps off the stage and walks towards Kyungsoo.

 

“It’d be even more amazing if I could dance to your singing,” Jongin states, and nods over to the stage.

 

Kyungsoo follows his stare and looks up at the empty stage. Maybe, just maybe, Jongin was all the motivation he needed.

 

“Everyday, every night I am missing you...

Even if you are not by my side...

Even if I can’t see you now...

My heart is always... because I’m loving you and missing you.”

 

The audience erupts into applauses. Kyungsoo bows and exits the stage, adrenaline still pumping in his system. He couldn’t believe it. Do Kyungsoo had finally overcome his stage fright. Of course, he couldn’t have done it without Jongin. He had stayed up many nights a week helping him practice. The more he thought of Jongin, the more he wanted to see him. He hurriedly rushed to the end of the backstage. And, there Kim Jongin was. Standing at the end of the hall, waiting, with a bouquet of roses.

 

Kyungsoo had a sudden urge to run into his arms and that, he did.

 

Jongin wrapped his arms around Kyungsoo’s waist, lifting him up and twirling him around. They both had big grins on their faces. When Jongin finally lets Kyungsoo’s feet settle to the ground, his arms loosen around him.

 

Kyungsoo’s arms are still wrapped around Jongin’s neck, his breath ghosting across Jongin’s neck.

 

“I did it.”

 

And, suddenly, Jongin just wanted to pull him in closer, and never let go, because Kyungsoo fit right there, in his arms.

 

-----

It was the end of their second year when they decided to make a pact. A promise that they would be together forever.

 

After the biggest soccer match of their lives, Jongin and Kyungsoo laid down side by side on the damp grass. Sweat dried on their faces, and their hair was still sticky from the game. Their breathing falls into a slow, relaxed rhythm.

 

“Can you believe we only have one more year of high school left?” Kyungsoo sighs, “time goes by too fast.”

 

Jongin chuckles lightly. “Have you decided which university you were going to apply to?”

 

“I don’t know yet. Have you?”  

 

“Oh, I got it! We should both apply to S.M. Art! You will definitely get in with your beautiful singing.” Jongin compliments, as he faces the light blue sky and closes his eyes, a large grin spreading across his face.

 

“And, you will get in, too. Because you’re such a good dancer,” Kyungsoo says, turning his head to face Jongin. His eyes light up as he stares at the serene expression on Jongin’s face. His eyes trace Jongin’s perfect profile.

 

Jongin turns his head to come face to face with Kyungsoo’s. Their eyes meet and Jongin whispers, “yeah, I can be the world’s best dancer, and you can be the world’s best singer. And, we’ll be famous together!” Jongin grins down at Kyungsoo, making him smile along.

 

“Promise me.” Jongin says, raising his pinky toward Kyungsoo, who stares at the hand for half a minute.

 

“What?”

 

“Promise me! That we will go to college together and become famous together!” Jongin exclaims, shaking his hand, urging Kyungsoo to promise. He hesitates, but reaches over with his pinky to seal the deal. Jongin’s grin grows even bigger and he settles back to face the sky, fully content. Kyungsoo also turns back to stare at the fluffy white clouds and thinks, it wouldn’t be so bad, staying together with Jongin that is.

 

The day that Kim Jongin was going to confess his undying love for his best friend was a day that he spent days on end trying to pick up the courage left in him.

 

“Hey, Kyungsoo. I have something to tell you. Can you meet me at the park later today at five?” Jongin asks through his phone.

 

“Okay, I actually have something exciting to tell you, too!”

 

“See you then.”

 

When five o’ clock hit, Jongin’s heart was bursting out of his chest; his hands were clammy from the anticipation. His right hand went to his pants pocket, reaching for the musical note pendant necklace.

 

Jongin was pacing back and forth. He glanced at his phone. It was 5:16; Kyungsoo was late.

 

“Jongin!” he heard a name call out. Whipping his head around, he saw Kyungsoo running towards him.

 

He was breathing heavily when he finally stood in front of Jongin.

 

“Jongin. I have something really exciting to tell you!” he exclaims, when he caught his breath.

 

“Really? I.. actually have something to tell you, too.”

 

“Oh, what is it?”

 

“Um.. you tell me first,” Jongin says, nervously.

 

Kyungsoo’s face looks like it’s about to split in half with the big grin on his face.

 

“Jongin. I got into S.M. Art! They told me a representative saw me perform at the talent show! I can’t believe it! I know it’s kinda early, but they said as long as I send in an application, I’m guaranteed a spot!” Kyungsoo exclaims, hugging Jongin.

 

Jongin was speechless. When his mind finally comprehended what his friend was telling him, he grinned.

 

He wraps his arms around Kyungsoo’s waist, and leans into the embrace. “I knew you could do it.”

 

“Nope. It was all thanks to you. You really are my best friend, Jongin!” Kyungsoo exclaimed, arms still wrapped around his neck.

 

Jongin’s arms slacken, falling back to his sides.

 

Kyungsoo unravels from their embrace and asks, “So, what did you want to tell me?”

 

Jongin looks up at his best friend. “Nothing, just that you’re amazing.” And, Kyungsoo just grins back at him.

 

“Come on, let’s go get some ice cream to celebrate,” Kyungsoo says and begins walking toward their favorite ice cream shop.

 

Jongin lags behind, the necklace sitting at the bottom of his pocket remains ownerless.

 

In just one moment, Jongin’s heart shredded into a billion pieces, before he was even able to hand it over. Because, what if Jongin didn’t want to only be best friends?

 

It was finally senior year. The year they were anticipating; the year to make their dreams come true.

 

Soccer practice just ended and Kyungsoo was packing up his gear into his duffel bag, when Jongin runs into the locker room, screaming, “KYUNGSOO!”

 

When Jongin finally spots Kyungsoo, standing by his locker, he rushes toward his best friend.

 

“Kyungsoo! Kyungsoo! I got into S.M. Art University!” Jongin states excitedly as he bear hugs his best friend.

 

“Really? Congrats!” Kyungsoo says, his lips automatically shaping into a bright smile.

 

“Yeah! Didn’t you get into S.M. Art too? We can go to university together!” Jongin states as they untangle from their embrace.

 

“Oh.”

 

Kyungsoo’s expression goes gloom at the implication. Jongin notices and stares at him questioningly.

 

“About that, Jongin. I need to tell you something. I got accepted into C.S. Academy, too. My dad wants me to go there. He told me he was offered a job there, so I applied. After high school, I have to move there, Jongin.”

 

Jongin’s face blanks out. He stares at Kyungsoo as if he has grown an extra head.

 

“Jongin?” Kyungsoo says, grabbing onto his arm.

 

Jongin continues to remain silent and relieves a long breath.

 

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner? We said we were going to go to university together!” Jongin explodes.

 

“I’m sorry, Jongin! Please forgive me for not telling you sooner. It wasn’t my choice. I want to stay, too, but I can’t. We can still stay friends.” Kyungsoo pleads.

 

“But--” Just as Jongin was about to speak, he was interrupted by Kyungsoo’s phone.

 

“Sorry, Jongin. I have to go now. I’ll talk to you soon?” Kyungsoo quickly grabs his bag and leaves for the door. Jongin turns and watches Kyungsoo’s shadow fade through the threshold.

 

“But, C.S. is across the country...and you promised.”

 

It has been almost two weeks since then, and they have yet to speak another word to each other. Kyungsoo had tried to meet Jongin, but he was advertently trying to avoid him. He was really starting to miss his best friend, but he couldn’t look at him. He was too upset, too heartbroken. Now, it was the graduation ceremony. Once this was over, Jongin would never see Kyungsoo again. At least, not until they were out of university.

 

“Kim Jongin.”

 

The call of his name breaks him from his thoughts. He stands up, and walks towards the stage. Once on stage to receive his certificate, his eyes lock with Kyungsoo’s, who was in the crowd. Not a second longer, Kyungsoo’s eyes drop to the ground, avoiding Jongin’s intense stare.

 

Jongin walks back to his seat and awaits the rest of the long list of graduates.

 

“Now, all of you have grown through the years, may the rest of your academic career become a success! Congratulations class of 2013!”

 

At the ending speech, the crowd erupts into a cheering mass. Graduates throwing their caps, and running towards their friends and families. Among the crowd, Jongin sees his parents and walks over to them casually, giving them a bright smile. His father pats him on the back and leads them out of the auditorium. Jongin’s eyes linger towards the crowd again, hoping to get a glimpse of Kyungsoo.

 

Jongin walked down the halls of the school. As he approaches his locker, he sees a figure standing there.

 

“Kyungsoo!” he calls out.

 

The figure turns towards him as Jongin quickly approaches.

 

“Hey, Jongin,” he says quietly and gives a slight smile.

 

“What are you doing here?” Jongin asks when he was standing in front of the shorter male.

 

“I came to collect the rest of my things.”

 

“Oh, I see,” Jongin mumbles.

 

A slow silence soon followed. Jongin rubs the back of his neck, “So.. we finally graduated!” he states dramatically, to ease the tension.

 

Kyungsoo gives a slow nod, but smiles anyway.

 

“Will you be staying here for the summer?” Jongin asks, anxiously, looking at Kyungsoo with hopeful eyes.  

 

Kyungsoo’s smile falters and breaks the eye contact. His hand goes down to the ends of his shirt, fidgeting with the loose thread. “I’m sorry, Jongin, but my dad already booked the plane tickets in three hours. He wants to move there as soon as possible, to get ourselves settled in,” Kyungsoo mumbles dejectedly.

 

Jongin’s face becomes crestfallen, his shoulders droop, and eyes cast down to the floor. Kyungsoo steps forward, bringing the two of them less than a foot away from each other. His eyes gloss over as he leans in and wraps his arms around Jongin’s neck.

 

“I’m sorry. I’ll miss you, Jongin.” His tightens his embrace for an extra second longer before he let’s go.

 

“Bye Jongin.”

 

This time, Jongin isn’t strong enough to look back and watch his best friend, his long time crush, his everything, walk away, out of his life forever, so he doesn’t. He listens until the footsteps fade into silence. He turns to his locker, pulling it open. Out of the corner of his eye, he notices a blue envelope fall to the ground. He bends down and picks it up. Written on the front was the name Kim Jongin in a neat script that he knows only belongs to Kyungsoo.

 

Jongin,

 

I know it might be late, but I just wanted you to know that ever since that day we got caught running in the hallways, I knew we’d be best friends. We helped each other through all the ups and downs. And, you were always there for me when I really needed someone. I’m sorry I broke my promise, but I will really miss you. Jongin, I know you only see me as your best friend. A best friend. I really hate that label, because to me, you are more than that. I love you, Jongin. I know that it’s impossible, but I think I might have fallen in love with you. I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you directly. I’m really sorry. Please forgive me, for everything.

 

Sorry.

 

Love,

Kyungsoo

 

Jongin grips the letter in his hand. His mind runs thoughts one after another. Everything settles on one thing: Do Kyungsoo. He runs down the hall, toward the front, hoping to find the love of his life.

 

--

Here Kim Jongin was, standing in the same situation he had four years ago, receiving a certificate honoring his academic skills.

 

“Congratulations, you all are now ready for the outside world.”

 

Jongin stands from his spot and rushes over to that familiar face, who he knows is waiting for him.

 

“Jongin!”

 

“Kyungsoo!”

 

They reach for each other, falling into that familiar embrace. Jongin releases first and stares into Kyungsoo’s face. He looks brighter, more cheerful, nothing like how he looked four years ago. The best part of it all, was the shining music note pendant hanging from his neck.

 

“What?”

 

Jongin breaks into a smile. “I love you, Do Kyungsoo.”

 

“To tell you the truth, Kim Jongin, I love you too,” he says before standing on his tiptoes, wrapping his arms around Jongin’s neck, and connecting their lips. Jongin wraps his arms around his waist, pulling him closer, and smiles into the kiss.

 

“I already know that, you idiot.”

 

Friends. Best friends. Lovers. Boyfriends. These were all just meaningless labels, because they were just Kim Jongin and Do Kyungsoo.

 

And, Kyungsoo was going to become the world’s best singer, and Jongin the best dancer. They were going to fulfill their dreams.

Together.