People said we need to grow maturer to understand love, to get what it means, to know how should  you act towards someone who you love.

"Please save me, Seunghyun..." I still remember how she's begging at me. While her tears were nonstop flowing from, that black eyeliner color ruined because of her tears. She's holding my hands, I didn't know it because too tight or because my heart stop beating and did not flowing the blood properly to my veins. I couldn't feel my hand that turn into the cold died hand. 

"Save me... I love you" 


"I can't, Bommie..." That's short words as replied,  I didn't give an explaination why I had to be so selfish, only wanted to help my own self out from her problem. I should have explain to her how much I love her, how much I hurted by heard her problem. 


That day, my first love that I love so much, told me she had to marry with someone else because her parent forced her to do so. I could not do anything, I just here being so stupid like an useless guy who said 'I can't' instead 'I will because I love you', that made me hate myself so much. I scared I couldn't help her and I will just bring her to even worse life instead. He deserve someone who could make her happy, while I only a student of doctor major who should work part-time after my classes.    

"Why?" She's asking with her trembling lips which parted make an 'o' shape, surprised of my replied.


"I couldn't. I don't love you anymore..." That what I said to her. I thought my pride too precious for I explain to her how difficult to live without enough money. I couldn't treat her well without enough money. I was afraid I would lose her because I don't treat her that well, then I chose to let her go so I'll not lose my pride, so stupid wasn't I? 


I could feel her grip loosen after I told her about that stupid lie. Her hands fall weakly on her sides, her beg gazed slowly gone. Her stares completely blank. I couldn't help myself, a tears escape from my eye.

"Now please go..." I said with my deep voice didn't dare even to peek at her stare. 


She was standing up from the seat next to me, while trying to manage herself from falling because her weak knees. I held her arms when she's about collapse.

"Okay Seunghyun, kenchana..." She said while tried to smile at me. "I will cheat for the rest of my life start from my wedding day." Those was the last words I heard from her, before she went away from me,


and my life. 




Until today.

I'm running to the emergency unit to checking up some patients.

"Please check his blood pressure." I commanded to a nurse while I'm checking a patient in front of me, as a doctor I have to do it carefully and quickly because another patient since they need to got treatment as soon as possible, I could heard some of other sides of room whining, whimpering while waiting to get their turn. Every patients in this room needed to be handle quickly.

"Okay Dr. Seunghyun." The nurse responded while handling the patient.

I moved fastly to another patient at another side of the room, she's laying down on the bed while gripping the bed sheet while closes her eyes tightly. She tried to fighting against her pain.