I don’t know what great things I did in my past life, if there ever was a past life, but I was truly thankful for the events which took place the past two days. My heart curdles like eggs do once you beat them so much trying to rid of the lumps, as though I’m removing the pain.

It was supposed to be a regular Saturday, I had no clue I was being dragged to a hotel in London. I had only visited London twice, in my life. Though I live in England, it felt weird I hardly visited the capital. So, when I was told we would spend the very early morning travelling, I shrugged and accepted what my father told me.

I was only informed it was for a wedding occasion half way down the motorway, which wasn’t really helpful, but my mother informed me she had already packed for me. Great.

I remember pulling up at the Hotel and just thinking how crappy this whole weekend was going to be. But, damn, I was to be proved wrong.

I wasn’t feeling particularly great. I sometimes suffered car sickness on such long journeys. But, I said nothing as we settled into our room. I guessed I was just hungry. We ate a little and my family decided we should go out, shopping. But I had to protest. I seriously felt dizzy, as well as wanting to relay the breakfast I had just stupidly scoffed down. They were understanding and left me in the dining room, to our room, with the room key, stating they would be back pretty late since they would go to the pre-wedding party without me, if I went to see the in-house doctor.

I thought I’d be able to suffice and cure myself with a little tea. It helped, but only a little. A few hours of agony passed, and I finally dragged my feet along to the medical area, a nurse looking me up and down. My hair felt, and probably looked, like utter trash, like myself.

‘We have another patient at the moment, would you be kind enough to wait here?’

I gave a small nod, accepting her words. ‘Uh, would it be okay if I just walk a little, to help?’ I asked, but she was already on her way, walking in the complete opposite direction of the room. Well, there’s no harm in walking a little, it may help me get wind or something.

But, you know when you wish you just didn’t have such fantastic ideas? Well, this was one of those times. I slowly, but surely, made my way past the ‘taken’ room. But as I did, I noticed the door was left slightly ajar and there seemed to be no one actually in the room. I don’t know why I did it, but I needed to sit back down, and the bed, it looked damn comfy. So, I walked in.

At first, I didn’t notice anything, since the room was pretty dark, but as I turned to take a seat, I nearly fell off the edge. . There was a man sat on a stool, behind the door. His hood was lifted over his forehead, nearly covering his eyes. I stood up abruptly, ready to leave. But as I did, he lifted his eyes away from his phone screen, which he had just been tapping away at. I could not even believe my eyes.

I felt dizzy all of a sudden as I realised just who this man really was. He said nothing, but just looked at me.

‘T-Taeyang?’ I managed to whisper, keeping my distance. His head shot up and he just looked at me. . It really was him.

‘BIGBANG’s Taeyang?’ I asked, edging closer to him. I got my phone out of my pocket, and opened the camera app. But I stopped. He was here for a reason, something similar as myself, probably. As I finally became closer, I realised he was pretty damn pale and the right thing to not do was take a picture. He looked a little glad when I put my phone back in my pocket.

‘You’re really Taeyang.’ I whispered, my insides screaming as he nodded. I didn’t know what else to say. We looked at each other in silence. Damn, I felt crap. My hair was everywhere, and yet he looked neatly prepared to see the Doctor. I was just abouts to wish he recovered fast and leave, but suddenly, a nurse walked in the room, and furrowed her brows as she held her phone, initiating the flash.

‘No. Don’t do that.’ I hissed, walking towards her. ‘You can’t just invade someone’s privacy like that. He isn’t even well in the slightest.’ She looked at me with a glare and tried to push past me. But I wouldn’t let her. I had to protect his interests. I didn’t want his fans to see him all over the spread of papers back in Korea, and worry about his health. I didn’t even know if this woman knew exactly how famous Taeyang is, but I had to protect him. ‘Stop.’ I mumbled, and literally had to push her from the room. ‘You call yourself a nurse, yet you take pictures of your ill patients? That is wrong practice, just wrong.’ I shut the door, and took the precaution of locking the door, which I regretted as soon as I turned to see an anxious Taeyang.

‘Uh, I should leave, too.’ I mumbled, looking everywhere but at him.

‘Thank you.’ He said, smiling a little as I looked at him in horror. I seriously felt like sobbing everywhere.

‘Where – where did you learn….’ . I wasn’t aware if he knew as much English as I was speaking so I tried to form some kind of sentence with as much Korean as I knew. ‘Uh, English … language…why? How?’ He gave me a questionable look and shook his head.

‘Sit.’ He said.

‘Your English is pretty good.’ I mumbled, trying not to blush as I could tell he was staring at me. But I felt so bad that he was asking me to sit on the bed, when he looked in worse shape than myself.

‘Are you feeling okay? I mean, you – you look pretty pale.’ I mumbled, biting down on my lower lip as I flushed as red as the burning sun, or something.

‘Are you?’ He asked, ‘Are you feeling okay?’

‘Uh, I’m alright, I guess.’ I mumbled, trying to look him in the eye.

‘You know BIGBANG?’

‘Of course, I love you…guys.’

Taeyang chuckled as I flushed a deeper shade of red, which I didn’t think could be possible since I was burning up so much, already.

‘Lie down. Sleep?’ He said, sighing a little. ‘You may feel better.’

‘Uh, I’m alright. I’m actually… I’m hungry.’

He sniggered as I pat my stomach, just so I made sure he understood.

‘Yeah. Me too.’ He chuckled, getting to his feet. I kind of felt like I was now the one invading his privacy. So, as he rummaged through the drawers in the open plan Kitchen, I got to my feet, ready to leave. He turned with a chirpy grin, shaking a box.

‘No way!’ I gasped, running up to him. ‘You like coco pops, too?!’ But I stopped talking as soon as I realised I was fangirling over my favourite cereal, and the fact that Taeyang seemed to like them, too. He laughed as I ran my hands over my hot cheeks in embarrassment.

‘Sit.’ He pointed to the bed and I accepted his request. I sat and he brought a bowl full, with two glasses of milk. I was surprised they even had milk in the Doctors’ room. This was pretty much like my own hotel room, in a way.

‘Thank you.’ I whispered, taking my bowl. I began nibbling on the contents, hoping he would just let the silence be and let me leave quickly. But, I kind of felt stupid for wishing that as he took a seat next to me. Seriously, I was sat next to Tae-bloody-Yang, eating coco pops. I would’ve never imagined this in a million years.

‘You’re welcome.’ He finally said, smiling with a warm look. ‘Thank you, too.’

‘Oh. It’s okay.’ I tried to steady my nervous hands, as I held my glass of milk to my lips.

Taeyang burst out laughing as I set my glass down on the bedside drawer. ‘You have… a moustache.’ He sniggered, reaching for a handkerchief laid out on the drawer beside where he was sitting. I felt myself burning up once more as he held the handkerchief out, in front of me. Thank god he didn’t try wiping at my face, I most probably would’ve cried.

‘Thanks.’ I managed to say, as I pat away the remnants of milk. ‘So, why are you here? Well, I mean, why are you in London?’

‘I’m a singer.’ He smiled.

I knew that much, Lord help me. ‘Uh, yeah. So you’re here for a concert?’

‘No.’ He replied plainly. ‘Uh.. Wed – Wedding.’

‘Oh.’ I nodded in an understanding manner. ‘But you don’t seem to be looking pretty well.’

‘I will. I love these!’ He exclaimed, taking a handful of coco pops, shoving them in his mouth and chomping on them.

I laughed and found that he wasn’t that uncomfortable person to be around. ‘Me too. My father used to shout at me when I was little, because I did this.’ I took a hand full and literally shoved every last piece into my mouth. Taeyang burst into laughter as I almost choked. I had to stop laughing as I realised I looked really stupid at this moment, and quickly tried to eat them before I had to run to the bathroom, or something.

‘You’re okay, right?’

‘Yeah, ‘course.’

There was a knock on the door and to my dismay, well even to Taeyang’s dismay, we got up.

‘Well, thank you very much.’ He smiled, bowing to me. My eyes widened as this was the first time anyone ever did such a thing towards me. But I curved my lips into a bright smile as he met my eyes.

‘Honestly, it’s fine. I hope you get better so you can sing at the wedding. Good bye, Mr Young Bae, it was great meeting you.’

‘Good bye.’

I unlocked the door to see a male Doctor stood with a clip board. He looked at me questionably but I said nothing. I kind of felt a bit better after eating, and spending time with Taeyang, and so I returned to my room. I passed hours without contacting anyone. I didn’t believe what had happened. I wanted to tell my friend, one of my great friends’ whom I trusted but I couldn’t, not yet. I had to fight the urge because I didn’t want to compromise his health, even though I knew she wouldn’t tell a soul.

I sat under my cave like duvet, thanking the good lord for what had occurred. I gradually fell asleep and was woken the next morning by my sister who was talking on the phone.

‘Seriously, Dad? Yeah, we’ll be at the reception soon.’ She mumbled, turning to look at me. ‘Get up.’ She mouthed, throwing a pillow at my face. I mouthed a curse towards her and threw the pillow back. If I told her about last night, she would have cried or something, or most probably not believed me.

I shrugged those thoughts away and got to my feet. After chomping down on some toast, since no one bothered to order coco pops and I was far too hungry to wait for room service, I scanned the wedding invite, making sure we were going to the right place. As I was abouts to place it back down, a little card fell out.

‘Compliments to the Wedding couple on this beautiful ceremonious day, from

Special Guest – Tae Yang.’

I re-read and re-read the card until I had to sit myself down. He was going to be there?! .

I had to tell my sister but she locked herself in the bathroom, which I needed to use.

…

I decided to let her cry in public when she would see Taeyang in human form, that is if he made the stage. The ceremony passed in a blur and all I could think about was seeing Taeyang once more, just once to see him smiling at least. I needed to thank him for helping me recover a little, even if it was just a bowl of measly chocolate coated rice crispies.

…

I was right, when my sister realised, she nearly cried. I was laughing at how she held her tears in. I tried to act normal and not cry but I couldn’t. He performed Wedding Dress and I let out a tear, which my sister laughed at. I needed to tell her what happened yesterday, but I was afraid she wouldn’t believe me. No one would, not really. I mean, I didn’t even get to take a picture of him, since I felt bad about him being ill. Of course, I took plenty pictures of him performing, but that was from a far. I never imagined this would happen to me, though.

…

It was around 5 in the afternoon, the next day, and my father decided we would set off on Tuesday instead since he wanted to meet an old friend for dinner. I was in our room, on the laptop. My sister walked in, throwing a magazine at my face.

‘That car on the cover looks pretty y.’ She stated, ‘Don’t be taking the mag anywhere, Dad will want to read through it, too. Anyway, I’m going shopping for a bit, see you.’

I scoffed. No invite? I got to my feet, fixed my hair and left to go for a little walk, taking the magazine with me. I left the gates to the hotel and continued walking at a slow pace. As I did, a car pulled up beside me. I furrowed my brows and felt like running since I thought this was a little odd. Or it could have been someone asking for directions, I guessed. The driver did their window down and I gasped when I saw who it was.

‘Can I take you for a ‘thank you’ ride?’ Taeyang asked, grinning. I felt like I was stabbed in the chest with a carving knife or something, as he leant over to open the passenger side door. Without another thought, I got in. We drove in silence for a while, until he the CD player.

‘You listen to Bruno Mars?’ I asked, turning to look at him, who had his eyes on the road.

‘Yup. He’s pretty great.’

‘This is one of my favourite songs.’ I mumbled, trying hard not to blush as we came to a stop outside a desserted warehouse. I don’t know why he brought me here, but it was pretty peaceful. He turned to look at me with a smile.

‘You were at the wedding, right? I think I saw you.’ He whispered, letting out a small sigh.

‘Are you not feeling too well?’ I asked, a little worried about him.

‘No, I’m great. I just wanted to thank you, I hope you don’t mind.’

‘Would I ever?!’ I rolled my eyes at how quickly I responded. ‘But…’

‘But?’ He gave a questionable look.

‘I don’t mean to sound rude, I mean, this is going to sound rude but…’ He laughed at my rambling. ‘But my friend is going to think I’m crazy and won’t believe me if I tell her I actually met you. And.. and I just wondered…’

‘Yes?’

‘Would you mind? If I took a picture… just as a friendly memory?’

Taeyang shook his head and I felt my heart drop, until he curved his lips upwards, ‘Not at all. Go for it.’

I was literally beaming at that moment in time, taking my phone from my pocket. I selected the frontal camera, and felt slightly awkward as he looked at me, instead of the camera. ‘Wait. Can you take it? I’m not good at this kind of stuff…’

‘Sure.’ He smiled, taking the phone. I didn’t realise, but he became closer to me, our faces inches apart. My eyes widened but he just chuckled. ‘Smile.’ He said, and I did, and I held that smile. But Taeyang kissed my cheek in a matter of seconds, taking a successful shot and passed me my phone back.

I found it hard to speak as I looked at the image. My cheeks were burning and I felt like my breathing was constricted.

‘That was a ‘thank you’ kiss.’ He clarified.

‘Thank you.’  I mumbled, in an embarrassing state.

..

We exchanged email addresses, and he said if he had time, he would email me, one day. I’m still waiting as I listen to Bruno Mars’ Talking to the Moon, the song we both listened to on that last day. I think about that day, from time to time, thankful I met him, let alone got to speak to him. Though our time together wasn’t very long, I was glad. Sometimes, I think about him, and hope he thinks about me too, I just hope.