Jongin wakes up at the sound of wind lightly brushing against the long flowing curtains. He sits up and rubs the inner corners of his eyes with his bawled up fist before he opens his eyes and inspects the whole room.

It was extravagant; from the rich colour of red than carpeted the floors to the golden embroidery which laced the sheets of the bed. Scattered on the floor were mountains of clothes, shoes, accessories and unnecessary necessities, all which were branded with the flashy tags and excessively high prices. To his left was a sliding glass door, slightly opened to let fresh breezes of air enter the room. The clear transparency of the glass overlooked the clear skies outside, white clouds painting the blue like light paint brush and tops of the skyscrapers peeking up to compete with the heights of the sky.

Everything was so strange yet held so much familiarity.

The glass door slides further and a figure enter through the space. A body of a tall boy appears; a loose pair of shirt hangs down his skinny physique as he stares at Jongin with intensity and plead. He stops and closes the door, the light hums of the wind disappears to be replaced by the eerie sound of silence. The boy continues to stare at Jongin with those dull eyes and Jongin feels the need to speak, the need to give him an answer to a question he doesn’t know. He felt sympathy over the boy standing with frail arms and protruding bones in all areas; he looked so weak, poor, the complete contradiction of the room he stood in.

“What happened?” Jongin asks while scratching his head. He notices the flash of olive skin under the thick duvet of the bed and blushes as he realizes that without the coverage he would be bare in display in front of a stranger.

The boy breaks contact and emits a hollow laugh. He buttons his shirt from the bottom working to the top then reaches for the black jeans which were in the scatter of clothes. Jongin watches as the boy insert his legs through one and then the other pulling up the jeans as he stood up.

While meeting glances with Jongin, the boy tantalizingly closes the zip of his jeans, “You wouldn’t want to know.”

Jongin feels a hollow emptiness at the pit of his stomach which made him feel both fear and curiosity.  An act like this wasn’t something Jongin would ever do so he doubted the situation, he felt scared, violated yet looking at the boy’s eyes made him feel calm. Jongin didn’t know why but the boy’s presence relaxed him and he wanted to know why.

“How would you know what I wanted to know,” Jongin says looking up at the boy who now sat at the edge of the bed putting his socks over his feet.

“Because you told me.” The boy slips his feet into a pair of Gucci shoes and stands up. He checks his appearance in the full body mirror before nodding and making his way outside.

Jongin wants to shout but he doesn’t know his name so instead he stands up, making sure to grab a towel to wrap around his waist before he followed the boy. He pushed the sliding doors wider and stepped through it only to face the figure of the boy standing on the ledge of the balcony. Panic shoots through his veins and Jongin instantaneously runs towards the boy, keeping his distance as he pleads him not to jump.

“What are you doing?! Get off the ledge. Don’t do it, please don’t do it!!” Jongin screams taking a step closer.

“It’s okay, Kai,” the boys whispers and Jongin freezes at the sound of the name, “It’s okay for me to jump now.”

“What?! It’s not okay! Why the would you think its okay-”

“Because..” the boy turns around and faces Jongin, “Because you told me.”

The boy tugs his lips upwards and for the first time since Jongin met him, he sees him smile; shy and genuine, like he was happy yet so afraid; not because of death but because of leaving.

He spreads his arms out and brings his left hand towards his head. With one last breath, he salutes him winking mischievously, “Goodnight, Kai.”

Then he let himself fall, leaning ever so slightly to the direction of his death and letting the city beneath swallow him whole. Jongin closes his eyes tight and finds his body unable to move as he watches the boy freefall.

His senses fail. His body freezes. His mind stops and so does the beating of his heart.

Jongin wakes up with a deep intake of breath then coughs as the rush of air suffocate him. He’s breathless, the palms of his hands are wet and there are beads of sweat running down his forehead to his neck.

He hears beeping machinery running riot as it tries to match the speed of his heart. Tubes and medical cord coming in and out of his body and he feels pain shooting at every part of his body. He’s not bruised, he has no scars or injuries but he feels pain and the intensity of it all drive Jongin to exhaustion. He fights the urge to close his eyes but it’s too late and soon he is drifted into a long slumber but before he sees a figure running towards him. Face frowning displaying both emotions of anger and worry, his desperate shouts of ‘Kai’ barely register in Jongin’s defected hearing but Jongin still faintly catches it.

And almost instinctively he whispers, “Sehun.”

“You’re awake.”

Jongin opens his eyes abruptly and he feels the familiar leather chair pressing towards the area of his back. He no longer feels pain, he is not attached to any machinery and the boy was nowhere to found.

“How do you feel?”  asks the doctor dressed in a white lab coat. He holds a pen with one hand and a notepad on the other.

“Fine.” Jongin answers.

“Can you elaborate?”

“I feel nothing; I don’t feel good but I don’t feel bad... I feel fine.”

“Okay. And how do you feel after taking the medication.”

“Fine.” The doctor eyes Jongin and he continues, “I feel nothing; I don’t feel good but I don’t feel bad-”

“You were panting when you were asleep. Are you sure you’re fine? Did you see or feel anything strange.”

 “No.” Jongin lies.

The doctor opens his mouth to retaliate but was interrupted by the knocking at the door. He stands up and opens the door while Jongin stays seated. He finished his conversation with the person at the door and then wraps up the session with Jongin bidding him goodbye but before he hands him a packet of medicine which Jongin accepts happily.

Outside Sehun was there to meet Jongin; hazy eyes, tousled hair and frail body – just like he always was but this time Jongin felt glad to see Sehun. He’s never dreamt something so vivid, so lifelike so dangerous before and it scared him.  He takes Sehun and engulfs him with his tanned arms feeling Sehun’s limbs against his and smelling that familiar scent only Sehun carries.

“Whoa there,” Sehun says as he pats the back of Jongin’s head, “Kai let go of me-”

He stops as he notices the stash of medicine the boy was holding. “There still giving you meds too, huh?”

Jongin nods as he steps away and starts to walk side by side with Sehun. Taking a pill from the packet, he places it in his mouth and washes it down with the drink Sehun was holding.

"You're getting addicted, aren't you?" Sehun scoffs taking back his bottle.

"No. They're prescription, we're suppose to be taking them."

"Yeah, twice a day. Its only 1pm and you've already had more than four pills." He opens the bottles and tips his head back as he takes a drink, "are you sure you feel nothing? I mean out of the ten of us, you're the only one not showing any difference."

"How do you know that?"

"Kai, just because the door is locked doesn't make it soundproof."

Jongin laughs, "So you were eavesdropping?"

"Yes." Sehun states bluntly, "If you were me, wouldn't you be interested? You're in an unknown programme with nine other people. You take medication not knowing what its for or whether its actually medicine or just a sugar pill. Then you meet a guy who in a group of ten people is the only one not showing signs of improvement or change of feeling but is constantly questioned and examined. You're their most valuable possession and you're asking me why I wouldn't be curious?"

Jongin stares at him blankly, "Maybe I'm just a placebo and they don't want to discourage the others by telling them my meds are fake."

Sehun shrugs, "No, you're more than that. There are five placebos. All nine of us believe we're on the drug, we are showing signs thats we are, apart from you but there's something more to you." He pauses. "You look so painfully oblivious but you've figured it out better than any of us. You're a puppeteer and you're controlling them from above, you've got them hooked on your strings because they're not giving you the drugs, you're taking it from them. So, so why do you take them, why has it caused this much sincerity to you. Your addiction, there's a reason behind it."

He smirks and walks ahead leaving a dumbfounded Jongin on the spot.

He stops but doesn't turn around, "You see things, you see.. dreams. Don't you Kai?"

Jongin's eyes widen in surprise and as if in response to Jongin's shock, Sehun answers. "Why? Because you told me."

a/n: hellur, this is confusing but bear with me

sorry for not updating, i got... lazy. 

thank.