Dear Mr. 12,

The first time I saw you once again after a year passed, I cant explain it clearly but I felt so elated and flabbergasted. I cant explain my feelings. I felt like jumping in front of the crowd. After a very long year of not seeing even just a shadow of you, I admit I completely forgotten you. You were lost in my mind like bubble which busted after it was blown. You completely disappeared in my mind like a blink of an eye. I focused my mind to KPOP, like what I did before I met you. I met Super Junior and it was the reason why you were out of my mind for those months that passed. I focused and gave my attention to them. I`ve gone crazy as I watch them. I wanted to watch all their live performances, variety shows, concerts and everything about them. But I dont know how to because they were too far away from me. They`re million miles away from me.

But time and destiny are really unpredictable. You came back. You played for our basketball team. I didnt praise you yet so here, "YOU ARE ONE OF THE BEST PLAYERS IN OUR TEAM!" , but if somebody would ask me I`ll definitely answer "YOU ARE THE BEST ASSET OF THE TEAM!" though you were not the MVP of the year.

I admit, I was not there to witness and watch the earlier games of the team against the other teams but when I heard you`ll be playing. I rushed on with my friends to the auditorium to watch you and of course to cheer the whole team. That time, among all my friends, I was the only one calm and quiet knowing that you still didnt arrive. I was watching peacefully but my friends almost gone crazy yelling the players they idolize, adore and infatuate. I noticed, our teams` cheer got louder. My friend who was beside me nudged me and pointed out the entrance gate. I saw you entering, I didnt know why but a smile was formed on my face especially when I saw you smile.

You played after you arrive. I cheered for you. I always yell your name like an insane fan girl. Every time you did free throws coz you were fouled by the other team. I yell your name like expressing how much I like you. Every time you shoot the ball, I always never forget to do the sign of the cross (like what you do before playing) and pray “YOU CAN DO IT!”.Luckily that time, our team won. I jumped like a crazy frog when our eyes met. I smiled, laughed, cupped my blushing face, hugged and pinched my friends like crazy, and i even hugged the wall. I was clumsy that time. I dont know what to do. You were sitting inside the store together with your fellow players, you are for sure having a rest after the game, you were drinking soda that time. While me and my friends were sitting on the table beside you. My eyes just wanted to see you so I keep on giving my attention to only you. My friends caught me many times but they cant stop me from adoring you. I scanned you from top to bottom. I smiled as I do that. The sweat of you I wanted to wipe, I shuddered doing that. When I looked at your eyes, “oh , , no, i m dead! OMG! What do I do? No way! Why? Gosh! Im really dead now. What to do?”, those words kept on replaying in my mind ot the fact that you were also looking back. At first, I didnt believe it. Im trying to convince myself that you are just cross-eyed. But NO. It`s impossible. If you`re cross-eyed, how can you shoot the ball perfectly? I sighed deeply, trying to relax myself. I may not be smiling physically that time, but mentally and emotionally, Im obviously smiling like an idiot.

The championship game has arrived, the first day of the month of May, year 2011. You were late again but you arrived on the right time before the game has started. Howls filled the auditorium. Everyone of us felt so nervous as the game continues. Both team did their very bests so the score were very close next to each other. The last quarter of the game came. I know you were very worried. I based that on your expressions. You were nervous so you cant concentrate that much. Unexpectedly, you suffered from cramps. Seeing you in pain made me worry a lot. Especially on hearing the howls of the opponent team which seemed to be a victory for them seeing you in pain. I cant do anything. I was sitting on the bleachers surrounded by crowd. I have no right to come near you and heal your pain. The team coach said you`ll be resting for a while but you insisted you`re okay so you played again. You did your best and made points for the last minute of the game. You were determined. Im so proud of you. JAll of you combined your efforts and energy just to make the title yours, and successfully our team made it. We`re the CHAMPION. I can see you were very happy that time. After the game was the awarding ceremony. Though you were not the MVP of the year. You still did your very best as a player of the team. You showed your sportsmanship. For that, you`re the Most Valuable player for me. You may not have the trophy, but you have me, you have a supporter like me. J

Picture time. My friend had the courage to ask you for a group picture. At first, you refused knowing that my BOY friend is a girl-hearted.. At the corner, I was like “WTH! How can my friend do that? I mean how can my friend ask you frankly?” you then later agreed for the group picture. My friends ran too fast to you. Though I felt so embarrassed that time, i grabbed the chance. Then my friend who was holding my camera suggested that I should be beside you since we`re both tall. I insisted “It`s okay.” Im really embarrassed that time. I dont know how to smile. My friend seemed not contented so I followed him and stood next to you. I felt butterflies in my tummy. I cant believe it. I cant believe that thing actually happened. My friend then later said to my friends, “You es, stay away from them! (he`s referring to me and you) The owner of the camera should have a solo picture with him.” I yelled at him. “Yah, dont be like that. It`s embarrassing.” Though I really I want it so much. Well, luckily we ended up having 2 pictures together. The first picture was a fail coz we look stupid and dumb. Before you left, you smiled to us and to me. I jumped like a crazy frog again. I felt so happy yet sad that time. HAPPY, coz you noticed me, we have pictures together and you smiled at me. But SAD for only one reason, I would not be able to see you again for 1 long year which seemed to be a decade for me. I can still remember when you said “GOODBYE” to us, it was last year. I just cant remember the exact date but I guess it was on April. You even waved at us with your smiling face.

But I know all of these were very wrong knowing that you have your own family already. You have your wife and daughter already. It`s funny right? I always ask myself why did I fall for you? There were many players of the team, but why you? Why does it need to be you? It`s so complicated. I want you but I know I can never have you. I miss you but I know you will never do coz you dont know how I feel. But though it`s like that, I just wanna tell you, thank you for being part of my teenage life. Thank you for the smiles and gazes you had given me. It happened to be like this and I feel so sad, but I know God has better plan for me. I may not have you, but expect me to always support you on every game. I may not be your girl, but I`ll always be a fan of yours. Go idol! Go #12! Take care always. I hope you`ll have a very happy family. May God bless you and your family.

I know i made the right decision. Take care always. Remember, I`LL ALWAYS BE A FAN OF YOURS. Thank you for inspiring me Mr. 12. Tsp.tsp.tsp. I dont wanna say good bye coz for sure I can see you again next year. Mwah.

From the avid fan of yours,

Ms. 22