Reviewer : Twinity

Title: 4/5:

The title is simple and links with the story perfectly. However, it won’t actually be considered “eye catching” as most readers tend to not be drawn to deep, meaningful titles. But either than it’s simplicity, it’s good.

Foreword/Description: 10/10:

There was nothing wrong with the description so I liked it. It started off like you would expect all stories should be like: calm and peaceful. But just as I had hit the last line, my curiosity went wild and craved for knowledge of the story’s content. Short but sweet!

Characters: 15/15:

Again, there was nothing wrong with this part of the story as the characters had stayed true to their role with Yi Xing playing a photographer who was quickly being suffocated in his gloomy world while Kris played his part in “breaking the window”. Love the paring, too ^^

Plot/Originality: 15/15:

I'm going to be completely honest, I had no idea what I was reading until I was done then found myself sitting on my bed thinking about the story for 5 minutes. There was something beautiful about the story that had caused me to over-think during that time and the more I’d thought about it, the more meaningful the story became. Definitely a unique plot.

Grammar: 15/15:

Even I'm getting pissed about the fact that you’re getting near perfect marks for every point and I can’t say much about your grammar either. Throughout the whole story, I've checked on the placing of your comas, your punctuations, your spelling and what nots and yet…There was nothing to point out besides a few minor typos.

Flow: 13/ 15:

Here is where I'm going to be deducting points – The flow wasn't bad and I can swear by that. But there was something about the story that seemed as if it shouldn't be a story at all – I think it would be better as a short movie or film, mainly because it requires the readers to adjust on what was happening and why there were so many different scenes scattered about like that. Honestly, I was confused for 75% of the time.

Writing Style: 9/10:

One word: Unique. As an author myself, I've found your style of writing to be different to the many that I've read in the past. It did, however, required a great deal of imagination but the result was beautiful in my opinion. It just took a bit of time for me to realize what was going on.

General Enjoyment: 12/15:

Despite your good marks, I have to admit that the story was a bit confusing for my taste and by reading your comments, I've realized that I wasn't the only one. The whole story was set in the past (as far as I know) and it was so metaphorical in a way that I struggled to understand what was going on. Your story brought beautiful, bitter-sweet meaning to the phrase, “You colour my world” but it would, like I said, require a great deal of imagination to read it correctly. Also, I was not very fond of the way you had explained the “Behind the scene” of the story in you're A/N. The thing that had happened to Kris, what had happened to Lay and all the things that was not part of the story. A skill of a writer is to hint out those little things to the readers through the story and not at the very end. That's like writing a whole love-story then suddenly adding, “Actually, she was a ghost” or some random like that.

Overall Score : 93/100

Reviewer’s Note:

This is actually the shortest review I've made since there wasn't much to correct and much to rant about besides the whole confusion from the plot. But yeah, the only tip I can give you is to not suddenly reveal the hidden plots in the author’s note. But either than that, it was an interesting experience ^^