There Chanyeol lies on the hospital bed. Machines are surrounding him, beeping every now and then. The doctor had just checked him a few minutes ago. He had been in a coma for the last three months. And earlier, he started showing signs of consciousness. Finally.

 

I want to go in there. I want to hold him in my arms again. But I can’t and I shouldn’t. just looking at him through this glass window is breaking my heart, little by little. How much more if I’m nearer? My heart would probably stop then completely break. It’ll be impossible to put the pieces back together again. I’m not strong enough. To get my heart broken again. I don’t think I’ll ever be.

 

I just stay in my position, watching him through the transparent barricade separating us. I observe him carefully. From head to toe. Even his breathing. It’s been on constant. Then I see his fingers flex. At first the movement was barely visible, and eventually became stronger. Hope starts to bloom in my heart.

 

But then his whole body shakes, almost uncontrollably.

 

His eyes are still closed.

 

A tear drops from my left eye. Followed by continuous flowing from both eyes.

 

Hope is replaced by fear. I panic.

 

I scream. “Nurse! Nurse! He needs a doctor right now!” my voice beginning to crack due to the tears. A medical team rushes into Chanyeol’s room. I turn around just as they start to perform the necessary medical protocols for immediate situations like this.

 

I can’t watch. It’s too much for me.

 

“Clear!”

 

I lose my strength to even stand up. My knees start to feel like jell-o. I quickly find my way to the chairs just outside of Chanyeol’s room.

 

I feel like I’m gonna explode any minute. I’m all wet. Tears and lots of sweat despite the air conditioning. And I’m panicking. I think I’m gonna lose my mind. But regardless of everything, I’m doing my best to stay as strong as I possibly can.

 

The noise coming from the room, it’s so loud—pounding in my ears. It’s not helping at all. Just making everything worse. But I still try to keep myself together.

 

I close my teary eyes. Everything goes white. Then a road appears. At the end of it is a person. It’s Chanyeol, giving off a glow that I can never mistake as anyone else’s. I run. Towards the glow, towards him. I just run. And run.

 

As I’m nearing him, I realize that this road leads to the edge of a cliff. Suddenly, the earth beneath his feet crumble. He reaches out his hands. I grab them just in time. I hold on to him tightly. Gripping his long slender arms with all my might.

 

I look at him. His face. It’s blank, expressionless. Nothing like the Chanyeol that I know very well of. But he’s crying.

 

“Don’t give up. You can get through this. Fight! For yourself. For me. For us.” I cry. I try to pull him up.

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

He lets go.

 

 

 

All the loud noises coming from Chanyeol’s room fade until only one sound can be heard.

 

“No. it can’t be.” I walk to the glass window.

 

After I looked at the monitor, I dropped to my knees.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The line. It’s flat.

He’s gone.

Again.

 

 

“You know I love you more than I always say. Wake up. Fight.”

 

 

 

---

A/N: Loosely based on Jose Corazon de Jesus’s poem entitled “Pakikidigma”. Also, I used some lines from one of 2Yoon’s songs from their Harvest Moon album.

My first angst. FAAAAAAIIIIIILLLLL!!!!! TT TT IT’S F.ING TOO SHORT. OTZ

comments please... thank you! :3