Youngbae woke up before his alarm went off and he shivered as he took the blankets off of his shirtless body. He got out of bed and sauntered sleepily into the bathroom. It looked like it was going to be a nice day but he was dreading being up earlier than noon. His eyes were crusted shut and he needed to wash his face. The cold water coming in contact with his skin woke him up fully and he stared at himself in the mirror while water droplets fell from his face to the counter. He continued staring at himself, hoping that maybe he’d find something, an answer, in the face staring back at him. Hoping that maybe he could look into his soul and have an epiphany. It was hopeless and he felt ridiculous staring at himself while he was half dressed and his face was dripping wet.

He finished washing up and ate breakfast, a sweet steamed bun and a glass of milk, before he got dressed. He wasn’t one to put a lot of thought into his wardrobe choices but he had to pick something slightly professional to wear.

“Jiyong, wake up” he said as he walked into his friend’s room and gently shook him awake.

“What the ,” the pink-haired boy yawned as he opened his eyes and an expression of discontentment painted itself on his face.

“You’re supposed to give me a ride to that restaurant I told you about, remember?”

“Oh yeah… I didn’t know you were being serious. You’re really gonna work there? How did you even get a job at such a nice restaurant?” asked Jiyong as he got out of his bed and stretched.

“Yeah. I feel like I’ll regret it if I don’t, and I know one of the waitresses there, Jihye, she got me a job.”

“Your parents are gonna kick your , you know that right?”

“That’s why they don’t know.”

“So, what are you gonna do about school?”

“What, I can’t work and go to school at the same time? It’s my last semester anyways.”

“You’re doing this to yourself, Youngbae.”

“Doing what?” he asked; a slight defensive pang in his voice.

“Your dream is to be a chef, but your parents want you to be an accountant. Why would you want to get a job working in an environment that will only make the harshness of reality more difficult to deal with?”

“Because maybe I wanna be happy for a while before I have to be miserable for the rest of my life.”

“You don’t have to be miserable, grow some balls” Jiyong laughed and tried to lighten up the mood “I wish you were my real brother. You know my parents don’t care about what I do or how I am as long as I’m happy and healthy.”

“So why didn’t you tell them that you’re gay?”

“I’m a fashion student; I think they’ve figured it out.”

The two laughed and Jiyong finished getting ready. He had to look put-together everywhere that he went. Youngbae tried to make himself look as professional as possible despite his discontent at having to dress up. He wore a white dress shirt and black slacks, pairing them with his favorite black sneakers.

“They’re not gonna let you work there with that mohawk, you know that right?” Jiyong said from his vanity table as he filled his eyebrows in.

“I’ll be working in the kitchen, I don’t think it’ll matter” said Youngbae as he stood behind Ji and mindlessly primped at his hair in the mirror.

“Wow, look at you. It looks like you may have learned a thing or two from me after all,” Jiyong stood up, “It’s not great but it sure as hell is better than a tank top and sweats,” he said as he dusted off Youngbae’s shoulder and looked him up and down.

“Alright, let’s go. I can’t be late on my first day.”

“God, you need a car.”

“That’s part of the reason why I want this job.”

The two friends walked to their apartment complex’s parking lot and Jiyong spent a few minutes checking his hair in the rear view mirror before they left. Youngbae felt his heart beating faster with each mile that they drove, and he wasn’t quite sure why. He was genuinely excited, but he was also afraid that what Jiyong had said was true. Could he have a taste of what he loved and then give it all up just to please his parents?

~

“Thanks for the ride, see you tonight.”

“Tell me how it goes, and you better invite me to this place sometime, okay? It’s nice as hell,” Jiyong said as he drove away.

Youngbae walked into the restaurant and was greeted by his friend, the waitress Jihye.

“Hey! I’m so glad to see you. For some reason I thought you weren’t going to show up,” she laughed awkwardly as she grabbed his hand and led him through the restaurant and to the kitchen.

“I’d never make you look bad” Youngbae smiled at her.

“Okay, so we don’t have much time until we open,” Jihye said as she led him through the different stations in the kitchen. Youngbae stood in awe as he looked around at all of the equipment that was so shiny and clean it was sparkling with magic. His eyes examined every nook and cranny of the counters and cupboards; of the gorgeous plates and silverware. He looked at the different stations and felt a rush of joy. He would love to own a kitchen as beautiful as this one was. He tried to imagine all of the dishes he could make with all of the different tools and ingredients that the grandiose kitchen held within its walls. His fantasy was interrupted by Jihye pulling him by the arm.

She led him over to a man who was chopping onions, “This is Chef Park! He is the sous chef here in this kitchen and you’ll be working as a line cook under him!”

The man turned around and wiped the hand that wasn’t holding a knife on his apron before extending it for a handshake “I’m Park Hongjun, but you can call me Chef Park,” he said.

His chef’s jacket fit him like a glove and Youngbae couldn’t help but to run his eyes over the stranger’s body. He was tall. He didn’t look very friendly but he had mysterious brooding eyes that complemented his face well. Youngbae tried to avoid eye contact and shook his hand and bowed, “I’m Youngbae, pleased to meet you.” He was intimidated by the knife in the man’s hand and by how firm his handshake was, although his hands were unexpectedly soft.

Chef Park chuckled at how polite the new hire was being “You don’t have to bow. Go get an apron and proper head wear.”

Youngbae looked around the kitchen aimlessly before staring back at the older man.

“Oh, right. Towards the back, first door on your left,” Chef Park said.

Jihye grabbed him by the arm again and led him to the back room where she helped him pick out an apron and a bandana. “Wow, Chef Park must like you! He’s being kind of nice.”

“Oh , is he an ?” Youngbae asked worriedly.

“No, not really. He just takes his work very seriously. You’re in for some hard work!” she said as she tied Youngbae’s apron “I have to go, good luck!” she said before scurrying out of the kitchen.

Youngbae walked out of the back room and made his way back to Chef Park’s station.

“Don’t wear those shoes tomorrow, they aren’t regulation,” the older man said as he continued to chop onions.

Youngbae looked down at his sneakers, “what should I wear?”

“Anything that can stop a knife from hurting you if it falls on your foot,” he said in a morbid tone “dress shoes are fine.”

Youngbae laughed awkwardly. “So, what would you like for me to do for you?”

“Anything and everything that I tell you to do,” he responded.

Youngbae looked at him perplexedly.

“You’re my line cook, you do whatever needs to be done and I’ll tell you what it is when it needs to be done. I need to see what you’re best at first, and then I’ll assign you to a station.”

Youngbae bowed “yes chef.”

“I told you not to bow. Now wash your hands and go get a knife,” he said as he pointed to a steel table with dozens of knives set up on it, “you’ll be showing me your knife skills.”

Youngbae went to the sink and thoroughly washed his hands before he went to the table and grabbed a french knife. He walked back to where the older man stood “I didn’t know what you wanted me to cut so I grabbed a chef’s knife,” he said.

Chef Park placed a red onion in front of the boy, “do a brunoise,” he said.

Youngbae peeled the onion and immediately went to work, feeling a bit smug knowing that his brunoise would be better than Chef Park was anticipating. Chef Park was completely straight faced as he watched the younger man chop the onion. A few tears began rolling down Youngbae’s cheeks and he tried to keep his composure. He felt the older man's eyes on him and he tried to ignore whatever it was that he was feeling so that he could chop the onion perfectly.

“Not bad,” said Chef Park as he placed a head of lettuce on the cutting board “now do a julienne.”

Youngbae grabbed the lettuce and began to work his hands skillfully at it, carefully slicing it into thin strips. He finished and placed his knife next to the cutting board, “how is it?”

“Better than I was expecting,” Chef Park bluntly replied, “where did you learn this stuff?”

“I taught myself. I really love to cook.”

“We’ll see if that’s what you think after you work the line,” the older man gave a slight smirk “I’ll work the line today and you’ll observe what I do. Come in early tomorrow so I can give you more training. You’re good, but working in a kitchen with other people is hard and takes time to master.”

“Yes chef” the younger man replied.

“You in school?” Chef Park asked as he cleaned up the station where he was working.

“I’m almost done with college.”

“So why exactly are you here?”

“I don’t know… but I think I’m about to find out.”