title: 4.5/5

It sounds okay for me; sounds like a name of a drama or book.

Not my favorite kind of name but that's okay.

foreword : 6.5/10

Sorry but the forword doesn't make me interested in this story at all.

Well,it's not really match the title,which seems to be a story of the girl and her boyfriend

while the forword seems to be a story that focus on the girl,her life in Korea and Kris.

Second,I'm confused;Is this story is about their idol life?

There's a sentence says that 'she doesn't have any interest with idols'

but the plot make me think that it is about highschool life or something.

Plus,if it's idol life,Kris was in Vancouver but why is this girl from LA.

Another reason I take off much point is the introduction.

appearance: 8/10

Hmm.. this is in between of nice and not for me.

It's your first fanfic so I won't take off much from the layout or kind of that.

Well,I don't like the fonts and colours in the character introduction part,

the fonts in chapters and etc. 

The poster and background are really nice,I like that. 

I suggest you not to use some neon colours,it hurts my eyes 

even in the writer's part.

plot : 9/10

It's not like perfect plot;

not original,just something that you can find in teenager's movies

or normal fanfics. Highschool life,fangirling blah blah.

But that's classic,I can't write something so refreshing like this.

One mark really lost for not being so original.(But I love this lololol)

writing style : 11/15

I know,you just started writing these kind of things right?

I don't mind reading a fanfic that switch POV very often,

but just don't confused yourself,neh?

Chapter 1,example : you said 'I'm her sister.' - it's Iseul talking;

so it should be I'm HIS sister since Kris is a boy. 

Chapter 2: '50.000 won' well,if you're new to Korean thingy;

50 won worth like nothing. It's like 0.01 Dollar or something.

I'm a bit confused with the characters; so are Jung sisters idol too?

How old are the characters? 

flowing : 17/20

This is kinda okay. Things goes flow this happens after that,I can easily

understand the scene you describe. BUT still, things goes too quickly

and makes me feels quite weird like when they meet their future spouse;

they went crazy- something like that... 

realistic : 5/10

It isn't realistic at all; something doesn't make sense.

People engaged too easy and everything seems unreal;

Iseul hate Luhan,if I was her no matter if he saved me from a hungry crocodile

I won't risk myself going to a party with him without telling Kris.

Why didn't Luhan tell Kris and who would drink 5 bottles of WINE.

Seriously,WINE? That's expensive (well everyone in the story seem to be rich

but that's doesn't the point) If I wanna get drunk I would drink something like

beer or Soju,not wine. Plus,if EXO are idols in the story,

I'm quite sure that they won't have time to do all these things....

enjoyment : 19/20

Well I enjoy this :D This is a good and refreshing story.

It's not really my favorite genres;(and I'm kinda bored of EXO.

EXO fans are everywhere ._.) but this story makes me feels so happy.

It's cute and filled with feelings. It's your nice start for fiction world,

with the age 14 you still have much time to improve your writing!

You'll become a great writer soon. 

total : 80 /100

     ( Shinigami ) -

Nice and refreshing one.

Recommend for non-grammar nazi who likes 'highschool' life fanfics.

I need to add 5 points for enjoyment and flowing since it isn't complete yet.

(you can ask for a redo after you complete; it's okay to be more than 15 chapters

since I already finished 13 chapters)

It's my fault didn't write that on the rule ;A; mianhae.

I really really like the story! Fighting!