Kyuhyun's POV

Running towards her direction, my cheekbones are probably bursting because I'm smiling to wide just seeing her infront of me.

" Yah! Cho Kyuhyun! Slow down." she yelled at me but I can see a smile is forming in her beautiful lips, too. I run faster than before and engulfed her tiny body with mine.

" I miss you." I muttered as I bury my head on the crook of her neck. I sniffed her a little bit and she smells like vanilla.

"Mwoh? We just saw each other yesterday at school and technically, we were on the phone last night, talking for hours." she said to me and I just wiggled my body playfully and a smack reached my head.

"Seo Joohyun!" I yelled. Did I introduce her to you already? Well, she is the love of my life, the ice cream near my pie and technically, she is the reason why I smile every morning and the reason why I want to live longer. She's my everything. Pretty strong word to use, right? Lots of my friend told me the same thing too, but I just couldn't imagine life without her. It's just...hard.

"You know, I love you...right? she muttered and cups my cheeks in her soft hands to make me look at her.

"What kind of question is that, Hyun?" I laughed and looked at her brown eyes. There was something that I noticed in her eyes lately. Eventhough she smile at me, her eyes...they were telling a different story. Like it was in a jar and it has a label of 'Do Not Open.' I tried not to ask her, because I'm afraid of what she will say but today, her eyes, I just cannot even describe what it is. It's far from sadness and devastation, it was something more.

"Just answer me." she said sofly and I just nodded and smiled at her.

"I love you more than anyone in the world. Always remember that." I said and rub our noses together. She chuckled and for a second, it was like an interval of a second, I saw her eyes brighten the way it used to be but that moment ended too fast, too quick.

"I love you, too." she whispered and place her lips on top of mine and smiled shyly as soon as she pulled away.

"It's Saturday, do you want to do anything?" I asked as I put my arms over her shoulder. I looked at her and she put on her thinking face. She squints her eyes and her lips form a small pout whenever she does that. It was beyond cute, and if I can take a picture or a video of this, I will replay it over and over and over again.

"Do you want to play a game with me?" she said and I was rather taken aback by her sudden suggestion.

"It depends. What kind of game is it?" I joked and lightly pinched her slim waist. I saw her flinch a little and bit her lips to stop herself from screaming, I think. Did it hurt? I didn't even pinched her that hard. Seo Joohyun, are you hiding something from me?

"It's like a 'challenge' game. You up for it?" she beamed happily at me and I just couldn't help but smile along with her. There's something about her smile that melts my heart.

"When did GameKyu ever said 'no' to a challenge?" I said and she patted my cheeks and looked straight ahead, moving her attention away from me.

"Don't talk to me. Just for today." her words came out rather serious, but I tried to shrugged off the idea that came to my head.

"In second thought, I don't like this game anymore." I chimed playfully but her face remained the same. That serious and unreadable face.

"I'm serious, Oppa. If you can prove to me that you can do this, I will love you...forever." when she said that last words, her big eyes looked at mine and I was sure for a moment that there was pool of tears forming in her eyes until she blinked it away.

"Forever? Until we die?" I said seriously. This wasn't a game...I think? Was this some kind of test to prove to her how much I love her? Because if it is, then I accept this challenge.

"Yes, until we die." she said and pursed her lips into a thin smile. She inched her body away from me and removed my arms that was just a moment ago, wrapped around her shoulder.

"But, I miss you already!" I whined and tried to put my arms over her again, but she created a distance between us.

"Don't text me or call me, okay? This is a test for you, Oppa." she said and kissed my lips one more time. It was longer than before. Both of us didn't move. Our lips are just placed on top of each other and neither one of us didn't want to move. Until she moved away and my lips were empty once again.

"I love you..." with that, she turned her back away from me and I saw her wipe her cheeks. Was she...crying? I wanted to move and hug her again but she said this was a challenge, I just cannot break my promise to her, and that is to not call nor text her.

Putting my hands on my pocket, I headed home. What's the point of being alone in the streets without her, right?

----

"Kyuhyun, wake up." I heard my Umma said as she shake my body lightly. I groaned a little bit until I heard her sniffled a little bit.

"U-umma..." I said as I sat up on my bed and looked at her.

"S-seohyun...she..." she broke into tears and I felt my eyes start watering, too. The worst part is, I don't even know what's wrong.

Standing up from my bed and grabbing my hoodie, I ran out of the house. I couldn't careless wether I'm wearing a Keroro pajama set that Seohyun gave me, I ran, and ran. The road seems endless and I feel myself going in a dark forest trying to find my way out. I reached their house and I noticed a bunch of her relative are there, crowding over one place. Mr. Seo came to me and I looked at his bloodshot eyes and he patted my shoulders softly.

"S-she's...I... it's better if you see it for yourself." he said as he handed me a small letter that is placed in a pink envelope. Her relatives moved out of the place and it was just me, and a white coffin. 

My lips trembled and my shaking hand moved to them, to cover them. I made slow steps and all I can hear is my deep breaths and my steps as I went closer. As I made it near to the coffin, my tears fell. Placing my hands in the coffin, I slowly opened my eyes. In there, I saw my Seo Joohyun, lifeless. Dead.

I released a painful scream and held the coffin tighting to support my weak knees from falling in the cold hard floor. I bit my lips too hard that I can taste my own blood, but at that moment, I was numb. It was like a part of me, a lot of me, went to that white coffin with her. My tears were falling endlessly as I stared at corpse in front of me.

"No...H-hyun... please don't do this to me." a soft whispered escaped my lips as I run my fingers in the glass that's showing me her bloodless face.

"You promised...right?" I looked at the hand that was holding the envelope and with trembling hands, I opened it.

To: Cho Kyuhyun, GameKyu, Kyu, yKyu

You did it Oppa. I'm soo proud of you. You have no idea how much
this hurts me right now. I'm sorry. I once told you that my purpose in life was
to love you and bring you happiness, right? I'm probably doing the opposite
right now...but I just didn't have the courage to say it to you yesterday or
any other days, because I wanted to spend my last days with you with
joy and not sorrow. You have no idea how much I want to say 'You did it...
can you do it everyday? For me?' but, that's just wrong. Oppa, find someone
that will love you more than I did and be happy with her. I will cheer for you,
here. In heaven. I love you...forever and always.

From: Seo Joohyun, GogumaManiac, Hyun, Seobaby

---

Five years have now passed since her death and the day that I found out that she had a Stage 4 cancer, and until this day, I tried to convince everyone, including myself, that I am fine. I'm not sad, I would repeat those words over and over again because I'm hoping that one day, I would be able to convince myself--or fool myself that I really am not sad. I just get sadder because I try soo hard to convince them, but just like a glass house, they can easily read me. They know that I am sad eventhough I try soo hard not to be.

I'd wake up doing the same thing, but my body just seems to get weaker, my smiles became more forced. One day, I hope my heart would just stop beating but it won't. It just keeps on beating harder, getting heavier but getting weaker. It's still alive.

It happened too fast, that sometimes I hoped it was dream. But it wasn't and I hope I owuld just sleep forever than waking up in this nightmare.

I'm Cho Kyuhyun, and this...this is my story.